Patterico's Pontifications


The Funniest Thing I Saw All Day

Filed under: Movies,Scum — Patterico @ 7:58 pm

Was this, which is honestly for real and not an Onion parody:



  1. Epwj commences idiocy in 3, 2, 1 …

    Comment by JD (306f5d) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:01 pm

  2. Does it include a nude centerfold? I wouldn’t spend $15.51, but maybe when it ends up in the remainder bins I’d be willing to shell out a few bucks to see more of him…

    Comment by Milhouse (ea66e3) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:08 pm

  3. Utter perfection…

    Comment by Scott Jacobs (d027b8) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:26 pm

  4. It’s not out yet but you can pre-order

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:28 pm

  5. it reminds me of that bit in Hot Shots! where the copilot gets dropped into the forrest in dear hunting season, with branches that look like antlers.

    later we learn that jon cryer’s character’s family shot the hapless pilot and mounted his head on their wall, with a very funny pic of it.

    he tells the pilot’s son something like, “if its any comfort to you, I didn’t ask for seconds.”

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (73a7ea) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:29 pm

  6. er, deer hunting, even.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (73a7ea) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:30 pm

  7. That was exactly the image I was thinking about,AW, if he was really in her crosshairs, well remember
    the ‘dressed caribou’ in the pic with Piper

    Comment by narciso lopez (79ddc3) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:32 pm

  8. Not that I would ever wish violence upon anyone, but sometimes I wish our education system were better so young people like Bristol learned more about figures in American history, such as Lorena Bobbitt.

    Comment by daleyrocks (bf33e9) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:33 pm

  9. This guy is such a completely scummy guy that it does cross into comedy (so long as you don’t focus on his child). If they wanted to make a movie out of his life story, they’d be hard pressed to find a comic who could pull it off. Even Adam Sandler would be hard pressed to convince an audience he’s this evil.

    Oddly enough, Charlie Sheen is available and effective, Aaron.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:38 pm

  10. Mr. Levi has had many adventures

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:45 pm

  11. Levi Johnston reminds me of Carlitos………Probably the same guy.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:53 pm

  12. Carlitos is a very nice person I think and you should temper your enmity with graciousness I think Mr. Biden

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/11/2011 @ 8:54 pm

  13. Carlitos does not like me and has tried to get me off this website so um no.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/11/2011 @ 9:11 pm

  14. Awesome. Pure awesome. If Levi Johnston were John Kerry, he would still have the hat.

    Comment by carlitos (1596cc) — 5/11/2011 @ 9:14 pm

  15. I don’t think you should be so mean to carlitos. But I have hard edges.

    Comment by JD (306f5d) — 5/11/2011 @ 9:24 pm

  16. Levi Johnston and happyfeet are kindred spirits . . .

    . . . as happyfeet cannot help but be hypnotized by Sarah Palin’s ‘headlights’.

    Comment by Icy Texan (c84ca9) — 5/11/2011 @ 9:56 pm

  17. Emersome, to be sure.

    Comment by JD (306f5d) — 5/11/2011 @ 10:09 pm

  18. I beg to differ Mr. Texan personally I am he who is over the whole Sarah Palin thing my feeling is her fifteen minutes are over and her misadventures aren’t as interesting as they used to be… maybe if she got a talking dog or became a vampire she might could make it work for awhile, but how likely is that, really?

    Not very.

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/11/2011 @ 10:13 pm

  19. Agreed. Based on one of your posts in another thread, Bachmann is now your “hoochie” of choice.

    Comment by Icy Texan (c84ca9) — 5/12/2011 @ 12:38 am

  20. If by accident, he were fully castrated in a horrible accident our gene pool would be better off.

    Comment by Sponge Bob Square Pants (fccc6f) — 5/12/2011 @ 5:10 am

  21. I would laugh at the jerk, but he has willingly caused so much pain to the Palin household, who welcomed him with open arms, when his own family
    situation fell apart.

    Comment by narciso lopez (79ddc3) — 5/12/2011 @ 5:14 am

  22. meanwhile in real life Meredith Baker goes Full Palin and quits her job to whore herself out for sweet sweet media dollars

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/12/2011 @ 7:47 am

  23. Check out Yahoo news, Sarah’s got a new look, a new TV show, more money, and she’s movin’ to LA.

    Comment by ropelight (3ac26a) — 5/12/2011 @ 8:32 am

  24. Oops, not Sarah, Bristol.

    Comment by ropelight (3ac26a) — 5/12/2011 @ 8:33 am

  25. Still trying to make money off of the Palin’s – what a scummy little conman.

    Comment by SPQR (26be8b) — 5/12/2011 @ 8:35 am

  26. Some people just aren’t cut out for college Mr. ropelight

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/12/2011 @ 8:36 am

  27. Twit.

    Comment by Mike Myers (0e06a9) — 5/12/2011 @ 8:36 am

  28. EPWJ is awaiting this book with baited breath!

    He will read it as soon as he finishes counting all of the Jews in Iran.

    Comment by Icy Texan (c84ca9) — 5/12/2011 @ 11:43 am

  29. Still trying to make money off of the Palins – what a scummy little conman.

    Comment by SPQR — 5/12/2011 @ 8:35 am

    And he’s got a kid involved in this. At no point has his behavior made sense from a father’s point of view. If he simply tried to be a dad first and grew up, I think most people would forgive him for a lot. Then again, he’s done quite a lot to forgive.

    If someone did this to a major democrat’s family, I don’t think they would do so well.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/12/2011 @ 11:46 am

  30. A Levi by any other name is a Kennedy.

    Comment by Ed from SFV (4a7c52) — 5/12/2011 @ 1:24 pm

  31. Hi Mr. Johnston I been waiting in line for four hours! Can you please make the inscription “to my friend happyfeet thanks so much for all you do you make America better” hah thank you that’s perfect and good luck in all your endeavors ok bye.

    Comment by happyfeet (a55ba0) — 5/12/2011 @ 2:45 pm

  32. “Ass in the Headlights” would have been a better title.

    Comment by Cynic (ba7756) — 5/12/2011 @ 6:17 pm

  33. Somehow, I can see happyfeet wanting an autographed copy. Happyfeet, do you have the Playgirl photos too?

    Comment by SPQR (26be8b) — 5/12/2011 @ 7:11 pm

  34. no I don’t have the Playgirl photos but I saw some of them on the internet once I think and damn – he didn’t have no clothes on in them Mr. SPQR. Not a stitch! I think somehow he must’ve been tricked into taking off his clothes and they didn’t tell him they had a camera. Poor guy he’s really had a hard time of it.

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/12/2011 @ 7:17 pm

  35. Poor guy he’s really had a hard time of it.

    Do tell.

    Comment by Milhouse (ea66e3) — 5/12/2011 @ 11:21 pm

  36. Better title: “DIRT IN THE HEADLIGHTS”

    Comment by sherlock (9f7b7f) — 5/13/2011 @ 8:09 am

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