Patterico's Pontifications

4/2/2015

Meanwhile, in Unimportant and Whimsical News [Updated]

Filed under: General — JVW @ 1:24 pm



[guest post by JVW]

We interrupt the earth-shattering news that a pizza parlor in a small Indiana town doesn’t want to be forced by law to cater a gay wedding to announce something far less vital to the survival of society: it would appear that our capitulations to – er, sorry, negotiations with – Iran have concluded and that the Mullahs of Nuke have gotten almost everything they wanted from our crack team led by decorated war hero John Kerry. The one silver lining is that Iran has agreed to transfer most of their enriched uranium to our staunch, reliable, steadfast ally. . . uh . . . Russia.

Would it be too gauche of Iran to celebrate the deal by publicly executing one of its citizens who has been convicted of engaging in homosexual acts? Has anyone bothered to ask Tim Cook how this nuke deal might help sales of Apple products in the Islamic Republic?

Update: When a Democrat administration has lost the Washington Post editorial board . . . .

– JVW

63 Responses to “Meanwhile, in Unimportant and Whimsical News [Updated]”

  1. we can’t have an oil pipeline but Asia gets a convoy of enriched nuclear uranium?

    it’s NOT FAIR

    happyfeet (a037ad)

  2. right in time for Passover

    seeRpea (181740)

  3. Not only do we need an oil pipeline, but we also need a water pipeline

    bald01 (9cd062)

  4. Well, for you low information voters out there, they’ve agreed to a framework for further discussions which could lead to a formal agreement.

    daleyrocks (bf33e9)

  5. Well, for you low information voters out there, they’ve agreed to a framework for further discussions which could lead to a formal agreement.

    And this we are assured will be done by June 30, with no delay or tarrying on the part of either side.

    If Obama plays his cards right he may drag this out so far that submitting it to Congress becomes a moot point and the mess can be foisted off on President Hillary! right as she’s setting up her new email server and re-directing Bill’s lifetime subscription to Penthouse to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

    JVW (a1146f)

  6. We are so screwed.

    JD (1a849b)

  7. “We are so screwed.”

    JD – Good thing Iran pledging not to destroy Israel is off the table, so we’ve got that going for us, which is nice.

    daleyrocks (bf33e9)

  8. In addition to his bullsh*t, Obama believes his own lies re: the IranNukeStankDeal. What Kabuki theater…

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  9. This debacle almost makes one long for the days of Madeleine notat Albright. Maybe it’s wishful thinking on my part because I remember I sure was glad to see her go off the stage, but I highly doubt she’d be presiding over this dangerous charade with Iran.

    elissa (acc2fe)

  10. . . . I highly doubt [Albright would] be presiding over this dangerous charade with Iran.

    You’re undoubtedly right, if for no other reason than she is the daughter of Josef Korbel, a man who understood the danger of totalitarian regimes having been chased from his home country first by the Nazis and then by the Soviets.

    JVW (a1146f)

  11. Update: When a Democrat administration has lost the Washington Post editorial board. . . .

    JVW (a1146f)

  12. from JVW’s link:
    The agreement is based on a theoretical benchmark: that Iran would need at least a year to produce fissile material sufficient for a weapon, compared with two months or less now. It remains to be seen whether the limits on enrichment and Iran’s stockpile will be judged by independent experts as sufficient to meet that standard.

    So…after all of the smoke and mirrors, combining that with this: daleyrocks (bf33e9) — 4/2/2015 @ 2:39 pm, we’ve bought 8 extra months before Israel is annihilated??
    Am I reading that right?

    Bigot in Philly (not in Philly at the moment) (deca84)

  13. JarJar says the agreement is historic. Prolly the same sense that of an affrimative action spokesmodel might garner.

    DNF (9ddaea)

  14. says the agreement is historic.

    True that. Neville Chamberlain’s agreement was historic, too.

    Bigot in Philly (not in Philly at the moment) (deca84)

  15. Neville Chamberlain is in the process of losing his place in history.

    htom (4ca1fa)

  16. Obama wanted to get the deal done before the NCAA Basketball Title game. He was a smashing success. Finished early even!

    K9Ranger (1bcf6e)

  17. The Huffington Post is in full celebration mode. It would be a shame to interrupt the ball with The Red Death.

    Mike K (90dfdc)

  18. 12.
    Ten months, not eight. But you are correct on the basic point.
    The essential point of this agreement is that Iran now has Obama’s blessing to become a nuclear power, just as long as they wait until he is no longer in office. Before they were doing it in secret and risking war. Now they can do it safely and openly.

    kishnevi (91d5c6)

  19. Having that proclaimed as a victory sounds like cynical dark humor from a “Dr. Strangelove” movie.

    And there is something about the Iranians saying Obama is mischaracterizing it, that it is not as limiting as he claims…

    Bigot in Philly (not in Philly at the moment) (deca84)

  20. If only the mullahs refused to deliver pizza to gays folks instead of simply beheading them. Now THAT would provoke serious consequences form The One.

    Bugg (bd9445)

  21. Chamberlain for all his faults at least grew to acknowledge he had made a serious mistake.Such circumspection will never happen with Obama.

    Bugg (bd9445)

  22. News you can use: It is cheaper to get Matthew McConaughey to speak at your college function than Hillary! Clinton. Given a choice, and entirely putting looks aside, I’d certainly rather hear what Matthew has to say.

    The University of Connecticut paid Hillary! 251,000 for a speech that was not even commencement. Clinton was also paid $300,000 to speak at the University of California at Los Angeles and $225,000 to speak at the University of Nevada at Las Vegas.

    Matthew on the other hand is giving the upcoming commencement address at the University of Houston for $135,000 and will donate the money to a charity.
    http://www.washingtonexaminer.com/its-cheaper-to-get-matthew-mcconaughey-to-speak-at-your-college-than-hillary-clinton/article/2562446

    elissa (acc2fe)

  23. I’m inclined to believe the mullahs over the president. How awful and sad is that.

    Dana (109251)

  24. Dana@23
    If there is no firm written text, both sides can say what they want. As I believe someone here said. Can’t remember who, so please step forward and claim credit. But it may also be simply propaganda for home consumption, like Obama’s claims.

    Of course it will not be the first time in history both sides have read an agreement in different ways.

    kishnevi (91d5c6)

  25. Headlined on Drudge:

    LAUSANNE, Switzerland — Just hours after the announcement of what the United States characterized as a historic agreement with Iran over its nuclear program, the country’s leading negotiator lashed out at the Obama administration for lying about the details of a tentative framework.

    Iranian Foreign Minister Javad Zarif accused the Obama administration of misleading the American people and Congress in a fact sheet it released following the culmination of negotiations with the Islamic Republic.

    Zarif bragged in an earlier press conference with reporters that the United States had tentatively agreed to let it continue the enrichment of uranium, the key component in a nuclear bomb, as well as key nuclear research.

    Zarif additionally said Iran would have all nuclear-related sanctions lifted once a final deal is signed and that the country would not be forced to shut down any of its currently operating nuclear installations.

    Following a subsequent press conference by Secretary of State John Kerry—and release of a administration fact sheet on Iranian concessions—Zarif lashed out on Twitter over what he dubbed lies.

    http://freebeacon.com/national-security/iran-accuses-u-s-of-lying-about-new-nuke-agreement/

    elissa (acc2fe)

  26. Albright ‘ s deal with Kim was the template for this one.

    narciso (f0a3aa)

  27. Elissa, thanks. But the details there strengthen my suspicion that we are faced with a vaguely worded agreement that allows each side to claim it means what they want it to mean.

    kishnevi (adea75)

  28. Kishnevi,

    I did a post about it. Of course it’s malleable this way. Both sides can claim whatever they want and their people are none the wiser. But given the players, it’s fairly safe to say our best interest were not served.

    Dana (5fc867)

  29. It’s gonna be hard for anybody to know when they cross that red line, kishnevi. Because nobody even knows what the red line is. Brilliant statesmanship. Just brilliant. This is even worse than the “we have to pass the bill so you can see what’s in the bill” idiocy.

    elissa (acc2fe)

  30. But given the players, it’s fairly safe to say our best interest were not served.

    Dana (5fc867) — 4/2/2015 @ 8:27 pm

    We have a frontrunner for Internet Understatement of the Year.

    kishnevi (adea75)

  31. Elissa @ 29
    Can we even say there is a red line?

    kishnevi (adea75)

  32. Iranian Foreign Minister Javad Zarif accused the Obama administration of misleading the American people and Congress in a fact sheet it released following the culmination of negotiations with the Islamic Republic.

    OMG.

    It’s like a bad novel or movie come to life.

    I’d never thought I’d live to see a moment as absurd as this one, in which the main character (eg, the “US president”) and the heavy or villain are such grotesqueries, the viewer can’t figure out who to root for, who to root against.

    The script was written by the portion of the America electorate who believes that if the fall of the Roman Empire was good enough for Rome, it sure as hell is good enough for the USA.

    Mark (5a635c)

  33. I’m practicing self-restraint, kishnevi. To see what it’s like.

    Dana (5fc867)

  34. At least they have some red-blooded young men o’er in Ireland… http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=2c2_1427996287

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  35. Why in the world do we care anymore? The left has won. We’re just sitting in the fourth quarter waiting for the time to run out.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  36. re #35: not just the left, the degenerate left. and every time they do, you are correct, it is game over. There is a tradition (i think shared by many religions) that the Revelation of G0d that brings “peace upon Earth” will happen because everyone is so good or because the situation has hit bottom and the preponderance of people no longer care.

    The Muslims just might be preventing Messiah by mostly still caring.

    seeRpea (c1462d)

  37. elissa (acc2fe) — 4/2/2015 @ 3:48 pm

    I 2nd narciso’s mention that Ms. Madeleine’s efforts with the NorKor’s 2 decades ago are the prototype for the “framework” shoved up our arse by Lurch, and will lead to the same disaster.

    askeptic (efcf22)

  38. Both Mr. Obama and Secretary of State John F. Kerry

    does the wapo style guide seriously dictate the failmerican secretary of state’s middle initial has to be printed

    that is very punctilious

    happyfeet (831175)

  39. Israel may yet make a liar of him

    happyfeet (831175)

  40. Islamic violence and savagery continues daily around the world, most of which goes unnoticed by the MSM.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  41. National Soros Radio, earlier this morning

    The pulse of the U.S. job market will be revealed Fri morning when the government releases employment data for March. Economists expect employers to have added more than 200,000 jobs.

    It’s been quite a run for the U.S. job market. Over the past year, the economy has added more than 200,000 jobs every month. That level of job creation hasn’t been seen since a 13-month run back in 1994-95.

    Economists predict that the economy added 245,000 jobs in Mar. They also predict the unemployment rate remained at 5.5%.

    uh oh sghettios:

    The U.S. economy added 126,000 jobs last month, the Labor Department reported Friday. The unemployment rate remained unchanged at 5.5 percent.

    That was a big miss: Economists had expected job creating of about 250,000.

    happyfeet (831175)

  42. The Colonel non-Haikued:

    Islamic violence and savagery continues daily around the world, most of which goes unnoticed by the MSM.

    But not by everybody. It seems that insurance companies in Belgium refused to insure a Jewish kindergarten because they assessed the risk of terrorist attacks against a Jewish institution was just too high.

    The left claim that being concerned about Muslims and their potential for terrorism and Islamic fascism is “Islamophobia;” I call their willing blindness Islamodementia.

    But businessmen, on the other hand, don’t have the luxury of thinking with their hearts; they use cold, hard facts in assessing their decisions, because if they don’t, they are very likely to fail in business. And when businessmen in much-more-liberal-Europe won’t sell insurance to a Jewish kindergarten, because the risk of a terrorist attack is too high, you know that that was the result of a cold assessment of the risks.

    The shamelessly self-promoting Dana (f6a568)

  43. They also revised Jan and Feb job growth figures downward, as is usually the case.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  44. they must get bootlegs of the dark night rises, over there:

    http://www.cbsnews.com/news/yemen-prison-break-aqap-senior-commander-saudi-bombing-campaign/

    narciso (ee1f88)

  45. The last ruler of a “world power” that was as incompetent as Obama was Charles II of Spain. There are some remarkable similarities. Charles led a scandalous life as a young man. As a King, he was indecisive and apologetic. He left no heir. English pirates ransacked his Empire, establishing their base in the Caribbean island of Jamaica from which they preyed on Spanish colonies at will. Instead of adopting a rule that allowed more local autonomy, Charles kept to the old ways and staffed his colonies with bureaucrats whose “loyalty” was to the Crown. When the pirates paid a visit, these fellows found ways to be otherwise engaged and left the cities and port wide open for plunder. He was obsessed with religion.

    Obama will leave nothing of use for the Democrat Party, he is obsessed with political ideology, he is intentionally ruining the middle class and fostering division on the basis of the most ridiculous lies and falsehoods. He began his term in office wandering the world apologizing. He believes he has a “gift”, but it turns out that gift is reading a teleprompter and not much more. His first instinct is always wrong.

    And now, realizing that his tenure is lapsing, and his accomplishments to date negligible, he strives to square the circle to right his sinking ship and achieve immortality. The beauty of the morning call to prayer beckons.

    bobathome (ef0d3a)

  46. The French ?

    htom (43b82d)

  47. Sheesh. These guys make Neville Chamberlain look like George Patton. Cheers –

    agimarc (324b03)

  48. warning Noonan column ahead:

    http://pjmedia.com/richardfernandez/

    narciso (ee1f88)

  49. The Tim Cooks of the world better enjoy this while they can.
    When Shari’a is imposed world-wide, they’ll not be relevant any longer, except as a “rope stretcher”.

    askeptic (efcf22)

  50. they don’t think this through, what did they mostly use cell phones, for when they were introduced in Iraq,

    narciso (ee1f88)

  51. #52: askeptic, or as a target for rocks thrown by members of a howling mob. Their target being buried with only their head above the ground. Or is that for adultery? Perhaps Steve can provide the governing sharia scripture.

    bobathome (ef0d3a)

  52. The punishment means seem to be transitory, a will-of-the-wisp, as it were.
    Hanging, dropping from tall buildings, stonings, having a wall pushed over on you…..whatever suits the mood of the mob at the moment.
    And then, there is always Old Faithful: Beheadings.

    askeptic (efcf22)

  53. I like B. McQuirk’s description of Kerry’s negotiating skills:

    Picture Clint Eastwood, Mike Tyson, and Samuel L. Jackson playing poker, and then Aunt Bea sits down at the table. That’s how the Iranians view John Kerry, he’s Aunt Bea.

    I think it’s time to start spending those IRAs!

    Patricia (5fc097)

  54. How is this going to prevent war? Israel isn’t going to sit by and watch Iran go nuclear. Why should they? Why would they?

    hadoop (657247)

  55. clearly not, but proactive operations, pose a problem similar to North Korea,

    narciso (ee1f88)

  56. 25. Headlined on Drudge:

    LAUSANNE, Switzerland — Just hours after the announcement of what the United States characterized as a historic agreement with Iran over its nuclear program, the country’s leading negotiator lashed out at the Obama administration for lying about the details of a tentative framework….

    elissa (acc2fe) — 4/2/2015 @ 8:14 pm

    They do this every time. They did the same thing after the Freshman Dorm got them to sign the JPOA. The Freshman Dorm put out a memo about how tough they were with the Iranians and how much harm they did to their nuclear program. The Iranians called them out. They laughed. They said Obama was full of, uhh, excrement and they were able to prove it.

    I could turn this into a lengthy, link-heavy indictment but do I really need to go through the drill?

    The amazing thing, to me, is that these people keep making announcements about how good a deal they extracted when their Iranian prison rapists just aren’t going to let them have the least bit of dignity whatsoever. Plus they have pictures.

    Steve57 (b69525)

  57. The last ruler of a “world power” that was as incompetent as Obama was Charles II of Spain. There are some remarkable similarities. Charles led a scandalous life as a young man…. And now, realizing that his tenure is lapsing, and his accomplishments to date negligible, [Obama] strives to square the circle to right his sinking ship and achieve immortality. — bobathome (ef0d3a) — 4/3/2015 @ 7:55 am

    That’s a stunning analogy, but we in the US do come off worse in the comparison. Unlike the people in a monarchy forced to accept their ruler, we the American people voted into office (moreover, not just once, but twice) the horror that is Obama.

    “The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, But in ourselves, that we are underlings.”

    Mark (9e5f05)

  58. I think it’s important to remember that Obama’s national security adviser, Ben Rhodes, has a master’s degree in fiction from New York University.

    Not that he’s any good at it. Just because you engage in something a lot doesn’t mean you’re skilled at it. Look at his boss and his lying. The mark of at least adequate fiction is that it enables you to suspend your disbelief and Obama and crew have just never managed to achieve it.

    Just saying, taking Obama’s Nowruz message to the Iranian people (as if they live in representative democracy) as a sign of what’s to come they have a whole edifice of fiction prepared to unload on us about our new regional partner that we’re supposed to swallow unthinkingly.

    Steve57 (b69525)

  59. It does read like the spec script for Hudson Hawk, Vox bought it, but they’re like Mikey in the Life cereal commercials,

    narciso (ee1f88)

  60. If anyone is interested John Kerry wrote an op-ed about the nuke deal. It’s in the Boston Globe, and no doubt elsewhere.

    I’m not going to link to it because it’s vile and insulting. It’s notable only for the fact these people can’t even lie well.

    They lie a lot. They lie all the time. You’d think they’d be better at it. But before Kerry is through with his op-ed his later lies are conflicting with his earlier lies. Not just conflicting. Contradicting.

    If you had been keeping up with the negotiations over the years, it’s even worse.

    Steve57 (b69525)


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