Patterico's Pontifications


Ted Cruz: Maybe I’ll Burn John Boehner’s Book

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 8:29 am


But Cruz, who ran for the Republican presidential nomination in 2016 and may well do so again in 2024, is nothing if not a bomb-thrower himself, as well as a nimble opportunist.

“John Boehner doesn’t like me much,” his fundraising email said. “That’s fine, I’m not a big fan of his either.”

Calling the speaker-turned-lobbyist a “Swamp Monster” and accusing him of “an unhinged smear campaign”, the email told supporters Cruz had “put this trash right where it belonged, in my fireplace”.

“But I didn’t finish it off just yet,” it added. Instead, the Texas senator announced a “72-hour drive to raise $250,000”, in which donors would “get to VOTE on whether we machine gun the book, take a chainsaw to it or burn the book to light cigars!”

Were they always like this and I just didn’t see it?

P.S. I have a lot to say about the Adam Toledo shooting — more than I have time for this morning. It may be the subject of the next newsletter, which I will be resuming this weekend after a vacation. I also hope to resume the podcast soon. All coming up!

51 Responses to “Ted Cruz: Maybe I’ll Burn John Boehner’s Book”

  1. Well machine gunning books, perhaps in a large festive night time event lit by torches, would be an innovative American update on an old tradition.

    Victor (4959fb)

  2. His supporters will eat this up and he will make bank off of the stunt. That makes him a grifting yet savvy and cynical politician. My question is, what does it say about those who take the bait and write him a fat check?

    I think that he probably always had these tendencies but until Trump became the president and not only approved of these cheap tactics but welcomed all like-minded grifters, Cruz accepted and worked within longtime norms. But like most in his position, he saw that he had a decision to make, and he chose what would increase his political futures.

    So many before Trump, after Trump in Congress. That’s a lot of power and sway for one individual to have over so many elected officials. And that’s a lot of self-serving, easily influenced cynics in Congress.

    Dana (fd537d)

  3. May be Cruz should wait for the next “Unite the Right” rally and torch parade.

    Rip Murdock (d2a2a8)

  4. i think mr. cruz is a big silly

    that’s what i think

    what do you think?

    nk (1d9030)

  5. I think that there is something to be said for manners and decorum. On all sides.

    But that doesn’t sell clicks.

    Simon Jester (b44756)

  6. If contacted for a donation to this charade, I’m going to say, “Tell Ted Cruz I want the $1,000 I gave him in 2016 back.”

    Gawain's Ghost (b25cd1)

  7. Instead, the Texas senator announced a “72-hour drive to raise $250,000”, in which donors would “get to VOTE on whether we machine gun the book, take a chainsaw to it or burn the book to light cigars!”

    The economics of imbecile Ted Cruz:

    So he gets a signed copy of Boehner’s book dropped off to his office which deservedly roasts the idiot Senator from Texas. Then, rather than just putting it up on eBay and donate the $ from the sale to shooting or power failure victims he abandoned in his state, Cancun’s Frito Bandito tosses the book in the fireplace and posts the pix on Twitter to fundraise. If he had any brains at all, he’d have waited to toss it into the fire at home the next time the heat and power goes out in Houston. Thank God he’ll never be POTUS; a bullet dodged. Speaking of which…


    Toledo shoot; cop in the clear; WTF was a 13 year old kid doing running away down a dark Chicago alley at 3 AM w/a pistol anyway; where were the parents?! Multiple police shooting incidents caught on video on top of 45-plus mass shootings in the past 30 days [Indianapolis FedEx facility, 9 dead, including shooter at night], the common denominator is clear: GUNS.

    America’s impotence at manning up and dealing with this domestic terror is an embarrassment to the world. A nation that cannot lead, and will not follow isn’t told to get out of the way– just left behind.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  8. cruz even called boehner “lucifer in the flesh” and put “p.s.: go f**k yourself” in his memoir

    such a child, that ted guy

    oh wait, boehner did that

    JF (6fcdbe)

  9. Here’s the thing about public opinion and police shootings: the press is unwilling to actually let people see the event. Instead they describe it, even if they themselves haven’t seen it. It makes the narrative more consistent.

    I’d prefer however that they let people make up their own minds instead of shaping opinion for us. Sure, it may be inflammatory, and sure some sick people would watch them over and over, but sometimes things need to be public. If they had shown the actual footage at the towers on 9/11, we would have won the Afghan war by 2004, although it would have gone much harder on the Afghans.

    Kevin M (ab1c11)

  10. Back in his heyday, it was said that Cruz was despised in the Senate. Now that he’s thrown caution to the wind, we know why.

    Kevin M (ab1c11)

  11. Well machine gunning books

    I vote he machine-guns them in D.C. After all, Heller legalized machine guns in D.C., right?

    Kevin M (ab1c11)

  12. I think Senator Cruz used a machine gun to fry bacon once.

    Simon Jester (b44756)

  13. Now that he’s thrown caution to the wind, we know why.

    Why not– the Cancun Canadian threw his kids under the bus.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  14. I just hope 26th street isn’t baited into protest…they will actually need the good will of the CPD if there are far more voracious George Floyd hung jury protestors invading from North Lawndale as in last May 31 and June 1 2020 in neighboring Cicero. Best for neighbors, friends and family of this kid to just write this off as an interrupted gang initation rite gone awry.

    urbanleftbehind (0b8900)

  15. Were they always like this and I just didn’t see it?

    Yeah… politicians were always like this. Maybe not at the level on national psyche like Cruz, but they all engage in this political nonsense.

    whembly (ae0eb5)

  16. I’m trying to imagine Ted Cruz carrying a machine gun and 500 rnds of ammunition for a few days in defense of his country. That’s what these guns actually are. They are symbols of how brutal war is, and how hard it is. I think they are cool, same as anybody, but they are not bumper stickers or toys.

    Shooting a book because it made you feel bad is pathetic. It reminds me of the daisy duke-drop holster fashion statement from women who have guns for selfies.

    Dustin (4237e0)

  17. No wonder he took himself out…he knew the arse-bleating Nimrata Haley’s peeps would have put on him if cornered and out of ammo:

    So now is this an Asian hate crime?

    urbanleftbehind (0b8900)

  18. 16.I’m trying to imagine Ted Cruz carrying a machine gun and 500 rnds of ammunition for a few days in defense of his country.

    He’s carrying quite a load already, Dustin– he’s passed the Texas bar once and the salad bar repeatedly. 😉


    Were they always like this and I just didn’t see it?

    Temporary blindness is a common malady amongst ideologues at all points of the compass. 😉

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  19. Ted Cruz: Maybe I’ll Burn John Boehner’s Book

    Mein Gott! What is it with zealous, extremely, ideological-driven, facial-haired politicians and book-burning.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  20. he’s passed the Texas bar once and the salad bar repeatedly. 😉


    Dustin (4237e0)

  21. #16
    You’d also have to be able to imagine him at the age of 20, two years into PT.
    But yes, as of today, the only bright spot would be that he carries his own supply of calories

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  22. Maybe someone should have told young Toledo that when you get told to raise your hands, do not use that same motion to bring up the gun and toss it. Cop + sees gun moving = bad day for you.

    Gangs should invite the local community colleges in to teach seminars on gun disposal in a variety of scenarios

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  23. How many of these did you fall for?
    I know I thought two were possible

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  24. @22. Weaponless Ashli Babbitt would agree. Oh. Wait. She was murdered by a Capitol Cop. OTOH, remember unarmed Daniel Shaver on his hands and knees in a well lit hallway reflexive hitching up his shorts murdered by cop in Mesa, AZ.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  25. Good for Senator Cruz. Boehner insulted h last week and expected himself to go unscathed. This is not Boehner’s party anymore. Get results or get out.

    NJRob (573a20)

  26. Well said Steveg. I wonder how many on here would apologize for falling for the leftist disinformation campaign.

    I’m sure they’ll just whatabout instead.

    NJRob (573a20)

  27. Cruz was always like this. Same with Jim Jordan.

    Paul Montagu (26e0d1)

  28. #24
    Black (addict) George Floyd died while being restrained by cops. Over a call for a fake $20. Yelled for his “mama”.

    White (schizophrenic) Kelly Thomas was beaten to death (beaten to the point where his airway became obstructed and he choked to death on his own blood) by Fullerton cops after one of them told Thomas they were going to “f*** him up” Thomas called out during the beating for his dad to help him. Cops found him to be in possession of other peoples mail. Cops were acquitted.

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  29. #28…Ah yes, with the assistance of the 2nd most famous LEO named Ramos. Honestly I’d be cheering like the cholos in the Sant-Ana taquerias when that verdict came down.

    urbanleftbehind (bb0e93)

  30. At least this gun punk with a badge did his own shooting unlike the Broward Coward, and while the kid was facing him instead of trying to get away like in Kenosha and Brooklyn Park.

    Did I say “gun punk with a badge”? Why, yes. Yes, I did.

    Adam Toledo’s family says the kid dreamed of being a cop when he grew up. You should believe them. You really should. Because, you see, the reason that we are having all these questionable police shootings is that gun punks who manage to stay out of prison go on to join the police.

    nk (1d9030)

  31. A machine gun, Tedtoo? Really?? With bodies on a cold Indianapolis FedEx floor? With bloodstains by the Fruit Loops in Boulder? With fresh graves dug in Atlanta?? Is this incredible idiot, this insensitive imbecile really this tone deaf to the world around him?

    Oh. Wait. Cancun.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  32. It wasn’t so long ago that Cruz was making good arguments, as demonstrated in this encounter with the Indiana Trump supporter:

    I wonder if that’s when Ted had his Trumpian epiphany, thinking to himself, “Wow, nobody supports me like that. I need to get in on this.”

    I can’t think of any other politician who fell so far and so fast.

    norcal (01e272)

  33. 32, you are correct, but I think it’s just that Ted got crap scared by that experience and decided to “show out”, not unlike a black cop excessively cruel to black interacting with, from that point forward. He does a terrible job of hiding his crush on AOC as well.

    urbanleftbehind (bb0e93)

  34. @30. Didn’t you see the ‘Hey, I’m just 13 years old’ emblazoned on Toledo’s t-shirt as he bolted down a dark alley at 3 AM clutching a pistol? Was it written in Spanish or English? Can’t cops even read these days?? Don’t all Chicago parents send their kids out at night to play with guns in dark alleys at 3 AM? This wasn’t baseball, where a tie goes to the runner. Cop is safe at the plate on this on.

    Memo to Toledo family: Homer has a message for you–

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  35. He does a terrible job of hiding his crush on AOC as well.

    I’ve never heard of this. What happens when Trump attacks AOC? Cognitive dissonance?

    norcal (01e272)

  36. That was not a machine gun.

    And I did not see enough shots fired to heat the barrel enough to crisp bacon. I question if it’s even possible with a magazine-fed semi-auto.

    Can you say “frying pan and stop action photography?”

    There has always been less to Cruz than meets the eye.

    Like a helium balloon from a party store that deflates when you take it outside on a cool day.

    nk (1d9030)

  37. There has always been less to Cruz than meets the eye.

    That would be news to his tailor. He wears that special kinship to the Capitol Rotunda on his sleeve among other places… what a ‘waist’ of space.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  38. @32. He fouled out with two words in Indiana: “Basketball ring.”

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  39. 34. All that tells me is that you shouldn’t be a cop, either.

    That’s why civilian review boards are really a gyp. They bring hairdresser-level standards of courage and judgment instead of police officer standards.

    nk (1d9030)

  40. @39. ROFLMAO. Believe it or not, the ACT test in HS recommended applying to be a state trooper. No joke. When we moved to the UK back in the day and had had our first social gathering w/some Brits, one of them asked us, ‘ So where do you keep your guns?’ Thought they were kidding; but no- dead serious. Said one young lady,”All Americans have guns.” That perception this country projects has only gotten worse since then. America is an embarrassment to the world on this.

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  41. America is an embarrassment to the world on this.

    And yet people still come here, visitors and immigrants alike.

    norcal (01e272)

  42. @41. Somebody has to pick the crops.

    “… because no one but a Mexican would stoop so low.” – Tom Lehrer

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  43. #40
    I think the only answer to that question is: “Excuse me while I whip this out”

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  44. @41. BTW: ‘Bangkok, Thailand’s capital, frequently holds the top spot as the world’s most visited city. It attracts around 22 million visitors each year.’ – source, The ‘bang’ there isn’t lethal– if you’ve had your shots; like penicillin. 😉

    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  45. “This is a nation of immigrants! You know what’s written on the foot of the Statue of Liberty, don’t you?” -Chris Cuomo, CNN 9:35 PM EDT

    Yes: Made in France.


    DCSCA (f4c5e5)

  46. Ted Cruz’s accusation of Speaker Boehner of being a “swamp monster” is amusing given that the former spent the last 4-5 years sucking up to POTUS 45, who pretty much embraced the “swamp” by virtue of his actions on many policy matters, the latter’s rhetoric notwithstanding.

    Boehner’s time as congressman and House Speaker certainly isn’t perfect and is fair game for criticism. Interestingly, the guy Cruz calls the “swamp monster” never engaged in earmarking during his entire time in Congress.

    HCI (92ea66)

  47. @43 🙂 I knew a guy in high school who wore a T-shirt with the words “If in doubt, whip it out” on it.

    norcal (01e272)

  48. #43
    Concealed carry

    steveg (ebe7c1)

  49. @48 Funny!

    norcal (01e272)

  50. Tom Lehrer = 2016 White Bernie Sanders Voter

    urbanleftbehind (57b327)

  51. “ Were they always like this and I just didn’t see it?”

    This is why I never quite understood never-Trumpers hatred of him as compared to other politicians. He is not an extraordinary case of a lying, greedy, dumb, corrupt politician. He is just really bad at hiding it.

    kaf (748c6d)

Powered by WordPress.

Page loaded in: 0.0982 secs.