Morton’s – R.I.P. [Gratuitous Name Dropping Alert]
[posted by Justin Levine]
In the past, when friends from out of town visited me in L.A., they often asked where they could go to see famous people. I told them they can always buy the ‘Maps To The Homes Of Hollywood Stars’ and see if lightning strikes for them with that method. There were also certain areas and shops that provided an increased chance of seeing somebody famous if they hung around there long enough. Having lunch at the Ivy would give you a better than 50-50 shot of seeing somebody famous. But if you wanted a 100% surefire guarantee of seeing somebody famous – I knew of only two options:
1. Go to a home NBA Laker game close to or during the playoffs. You are guaranteed to see Jack Nicholson there.
2. Go to Morton’s for dinner on a Monday night. You are guaranteed to see Ben Stein.
Actually, I don’t even know if method # 2 is still valid these days. But it certainly was for a long stretch in the late 90’s. That’s where I met Ben Stein. I only went to Morton’s on Monday maybe 6 or 7 times in my life. But each time I did, I saw Stein there every single time. Eventually, I spoke with him, and he was kind enough to give me advice about getting through law school.
Ben Stein was having dinner at the time. Normally, its rude to walk up and interrupt someone of Stein’s stature when he is having dinner. But at Morton’s, such table hopping was expected – provided that you had at least a modicum of Hollywood street cred. That’s what made the place so great.
Fortunately, I had the Hollywood mojo on that evening. I had worked briefly at a talent agency where we represented an actress who often turned heads when she walked into a room. She was with me for drinks that night, and was kind enough to accompany me to Ben Stein’s table, subtly conveying the message that it was OK for me to interrupt people’s dinner at Morton’s (although Stein himself is such a cool dude that I’m not sure I needed the ‘Hollywood street cred’ to come up and ask him a question).
Anyway, my drinking date was a trooper as she just quietly hung by my side as arm candy while the great Ben Stein and I geeked out on law school talk. [She was from Europe, so I’m not sure she even knew who Ben Stein was.] It was a magical moment, and I’m proud to say that I resisted temptation and didn’t embarrass myself by saying “Bueller?…Bueller?” in front of him.
Sadly, another L.A. icon is set to die a slow death. [I mean the place – not Stein.]
This is becoming a city of ghosts. A wake is definitely in order. I will miss it.
When I was living in Thousand Oaks, there was a coffee shop on T.O. Blvd that seemed to get a lot of local celebrity residents as customers.
SPQR (26be8b) — 11/26/2007 @ 3:05 pmIs the Morton’s referenced here the same as the chain Morton’s steakhouses? If so, they are one of the best chain steakhouses, only narrowly behind Ruth’s Chris.
JD (33beff) — 11/26/2007 @ 3:25 pmJD –
In a word, no. The Morton’s steakhouse chain has nothing to do with Morton’s on Melrose (as Ben Stein’s NY Times article that is linked to in the post also makes clear).
Justin Levine (20f2b5) — 11/26/2007 @ 3:58 pmHence my asking. Justin, I tend to avoid links to the NY Times, they make my computer run slow and they make me feel kind of dirty. Kind of like reading the LA Times.
JD (33beff) — 11/26/2007 @ 4:13 pmUnderstandable JD.
Justin Levine (20f2b5) — 11/26/2007 @ 4:50 pmWhat a great post, and I’m glad you also resisted the urge to ask him about the Laffer Curve and Voodoo economics.
DRJ (a6fcd2) — 11/26/2007 @ 5:12 pmAre you the Keymaster?
Karl (823ce6) — 11/26/2007 @ 5:34 pmKarl –
Not the Keymaster. Nope. But upon coming face-to-face with Gozer the Gozarian, the thought quickly flashed into my head that Gozer was a stunning model/actress. Sure enough, The Goz dumped the Stay-Puff image and transformed into her.
Justin Levine (20f2b5) — 11/26/2007 @ 6:38 pmI suppose in the future, we will be limited in our celebrity viewing to more pedestrian fare. Perhaps watching Mayor Antonio scrub toilets.
Another Drew (8018ee) — 11/26/2007 @ 7:59 pmLA is becoming a ghost town, of sorts. Sure, places like Morton’s are…were full of celebrities, but they needed civilians coming in on a steady basis to make a profit.
I live in OC–we used to think nothing of going to the Music Center, or to lunch on Melrose or drinks in Beverly Hills on the spur of the moment. Traffic makes that impossible now. So they lost all the customers who live over 10 miles away.
The other cause for LA’s demise is demographics: half of our population does not share our culture, does not wish to share our culture, and prefer to eat, drink, and attend the arts in their own ethnic enclaves.
Patricia (f56a97) — 11/27/2007 @ 8:27 amI suspect L.A. is going back to its old ways. Back in the Studio era the big plus was that stars could live as they liked in complete privacy. L.A. wasn’t a social fishbowl like New York, Chicago or San Francisco, and there was rpecious little of the “night life” of the sort found in other major cities. That gradually changed, but now it’s changed again. Add to it the plethora of paparazzi and you’ve got an excellent reason for everyone to want to stay home
David Ehrenstein (4f5f08) — 11/27/2007 @ 8:56 amto entertain.
I’m sorry if this is a bit rude, but are you going to watch Mr. Stein’s new film?
I know I will, though it’s not exactly my style– I very much admire the guy.
Foxfier (d50fce) — 11/27/2007 @ 9:58 amNice post Justin, and thanks for the link love.
You weren’t the gentleman who set up that interview with me, were you?
Related story – I was attending the E3 convention a number of years back and went out to dinner with a publisher rep. Not knowing the city that well, a restaurant was choosen visually, at random. “How about that one?” The door screamed Awesome Steakhouse, but it when they wheeled a trolley of cuts to select from, that I knew we were putting a dent in someone’s expense account – and loved it!
Sad to hear it’s riding off into the sunset.
castewar (6860e7) — 11/27/2007 @ 2:17 pmcastewar –
I’ll fess up. I’m the guy who got you the interview with Slavitza. However, in your anecodte, I think you are confusing the Arnie Morton’s chain of steakhouses with THE Morton’s which is not a steakhouse per se (though they do serve steaks there). It’s a common mistake since they are both owned by members of the same family.
Justin Levine (394d19) — 11/27/2007 @ 2:39 pmYou’re probably right – I didn’t know there was a distinction. Damn – you mean we could have made Disney pay more?
Cool running into you again after all this time! It’s truly a cliche regarding the relative size of the plant, indeed.
castewar (6860e7) — 11/27/2007 @ 7:06 pm