Rocker Assumes Responsibility For Her Rape; Outrage Follows
[guest post by Dana]
For daring to suggest that women can play a role in contributing to sexual violence by their actions and how they dress, Chrissie Hynde, front woman for the Pretenders, is now facing a backlash from the sisterhood.
During an interview published this weekend, Hynde, 63, openly discussed being raped by a biker gang at age 21. What is causing the feminist rancor isn’t the fact that Hynde was raped while a student at Kent State, but rather it’s that she assumed responsibility for the rape. Hynde, who was drunk and high at the time, freely climbed onto the back of one of a biker’s motorcycle and was subsequently taken to a vacant house and forced to perform sexual acts. Assuming responsibility for this, according to Hynde, is just “commonsense”:
“Technically speaking, however you want to look at it, this was all my doing and I take full responsibility,” she told the Times.
“You can’t f— about with people, especially people who wear ‘I Heart Rape’ and ‘On Your Knees’ badges,” Hynde added.
“Those motorcycle gangs, that’s what they do… You can’t paint yourself into a corner and then say whose brush is this? You have to take responsibility. If you play with fire, you get burnt. It’s not any secret, is it?”
She then pointed to women’s presentation in provoking attacks:
“You know if you don’t want to entice a rapist, don’t wear high heels so you can’t run from him.”
“If you’re wearing something that says ‘Come and f— me’, you’d better be good on your feet,” she continued.
Hynde offered this distinction:
“If I’m walking around and I’m very modestly dressed and I’m keeping to myself and someone attacks me, then I’d say that’s his fault,” said Hynde. “But if I’m being very lairy and putting it about and being provocative, then you are enticing someone who’s already unhinged — don’t do that.”
The blowback came quickly:
“Victims of sexual violence should never feel or be made to feel that they were responsible for the appalling crime they suffered, regardless of circumstances or factors which may have made them particularly vulnerable,’’ said Lucy Hastings, the director of the group Victim Support.
A columnist for Britain’s Independent newspaper, Holly Baxter, added, “This persistent belief that men are naturally inclined towards rape and that women have to dress or act or behave accordingly . . . is one that prevents so many assaults from being reported or prosecuted every year.”
Jackie Fox, lead singer of the Runaways, and rape victim, offered this:
“It bothers me, because I don’t know that she’s gone out there and talked to [other] rape victims. If you had seen the messages that people sent me, so many of them were about ‘I’ve always thought it was my fault.’ We already think that anyway. So this is just telling people who’ve recently gone through this experience of being raped or abused, ‘Yeah, you’re right, it is your fault.’ But there’s no such thing as asking for it. And poor judgment is not an invitation to rape, nor an excuse for it.
“I know so many women who were raped while they were drunk or high, and they all blame themselves. To say that a woman can’t misjudge how much she’s drinking, or dress in a way that makes her feel good about herself for fear that men aren’t going to be able to control themselves, or that she has to be able to know who is dangerous and who isn’t, is asking an awful lot of men and women — especially young people.”
Offering another perspective is Julia Hartley-Brewer, who recognizes that Hynde lives in the “real world” and understands people do not act the way we hope and believe they should:
Hynde was simply suggesting that women have to live in the real world, as it exists, and not a utopian paradise where sexual violence is a thing of the past.
There will always be rapists, just as there will always be murderers and thieves.
Pretending they don’t exist doesn’t make them go away.
You have every right to leave your front door wide open while you are away on holiday and assert your right not to be burgled, but most people (including your insurance company) might advise against it. Similarly, you are entitled to walk into an opposing football team’s local pub wearing your own club’s shirt and demand not to be punched in the face, but you probably shouldn’t be surprised if it happens.
In the same vein, telling a young woman she can wear what she wants, drink as much alcohol as she wants, go off with any strange man she wants and to hell with the consequences, is not a victory for modern feminism. It’s just irresponsible.
All Chrissie Hynde has done is recognise that the world is not always as we would like it to be.
That does not make her a rape apologist. It just proves she is the one living in the real world and it is the Sisterhood who are the pretenders.
Hynde is not excusing her rapists nor condoning what they did. She is not saying that rape should be decriminalized or that those who commit such a heinous act should not be legally prosecuted and face serious consequences. Rather she has attempted to learn and grow from her own personal experiences. Whether one refers to it as self-blaming or self-responsibility, she is using the opportunity to empower other women by reminding them that behaving responsibly is one of the greatest protections against those would seek to harm them. It should go without saying that this isn’t foolproof and I don’t think Hynde is foolish enough to believe it is. But what she is doing is using an ugly event in her life as a cautionary tale for women: To a great degree, you have the power to protect yourselves, so take care not to diminish that power by allowing yourself to get into an out-of-control situation where vulnerability is increased and decision-making becomes clouded. As much as is within your power, remain in control.
–Dana
Hello.
Dana (86e864) — 9/3/2015 @ 6:09 ami like her a lot
she was married to that one guy what sang la
lalalala
lalalala
lalalalalalalalalala
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 6:19 amProvocative. Just like their first LP. I see both sides on this, but err on the side of reality, and, as most of us know, reality bites.
Colonel Haiku (dc1411) — 9/3/2015 @ 6:37 amhere is a linker link for #2
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 6:44 amAnd she will always carry on
JVW (ba78f9) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:02 amSomething is lost but something is found
They will keep on speaking her name
Some things change, some stay the same
What, Mr. Feets? Wasn’t she married to the dude who sang, “El-Oh-El-Ay, Low-Lah, La-La-La-La-Loooow-Laaaaah”?
JVW (ba78f9) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:04 amyes yes she married me both!
got a smile for everyone she meets, that one
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:06 am*em* both i mean
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:06 amI found a picture of her.
nk (dbc370) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:12 amBut if young women start taking responsibility for their actions, and growing up, the Feministas won’t have a class of perpetually adolescent young fools to lord it over. Why “Gender Studies” parasites all over the country might have to go out and get real JOBS!
C. S. P. Schofield (ab2cdc) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:14 amgot a smile for everyone she meets, that one
I guess she made them see
JVW (ba78f9) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:37 amThere’s nobody else there
Nobody like Chrissy
She’s special, so special
The reality is a chaotic system managed through risk management. The cultural revolution created an unreconcilable, unstable state, that is not limited to the consequences from fanciful flights of sexual libertinism. Women, and men, have been poorly instructed and served by its poorly conceived doctrines.
n.n (60df76) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:55 amA common problem is to try to explain a complicated issue too simply.
The heart has its reasons, reason knows not thereof.
Some people inappropriately blame themselves for something as a defense mechanism, if they think they caused an event, then they can always do something to control their existence so that it can never happen again,
that is pathological and those people do need to be helped to cope by seeing maybe they did indeed have no significant responsibility for an event, but to learn to live life where everything is not guaranteed to go the way we want.
Likewise, I guess, if one thinks one can always put 100% of the blame on “that man the criminal”, there is an illusion that somehow one can force all of those men to comply with a new attitude.
Women marching down the street in NYC topless and saying “breasts have nothing to do with sexual attraction” can do it not only 7 but 70 times around the city and accomplish about as much as I can by claiming that ice will no longer be cold.
What she said is pretty obvious common sense as displyed in the quote by Hartley-Brewer.
Put it this way,
MD in Philly (f9371b) — 9/3/2015 @ 10:00 ama guy goes into a bar and pulls out a thick wad of $50’s to pay for his beer and buys a round for everybody there, continues to drink the night away, pulls out a wad of $100’s from another pocket, and then asks for a ride home from a biker gang.
Yes, the biker’s still broke the law when the robbed him and should be held accountable,
but who would say the guy didn’t have a large role in his plight?
Shorter version: actions have consequences. For all parties involved.
navyvet (c33501) — 9/3/2015 @ 10:07 amShe shot her mouth off and he showed her what that… er… never mind.
Colonel Haiku (dc1411) — 9/3/2015 @ 12:44 pmShe was also married to Ray Davies, so don’t hold that simple-minded guy agin her…
Colonel Haiku (dc1411) — 9/3/2015 @ 12:47 pmSeriously, it doesn’t get any better than that first Pretenders album, off-key voice or not.
Colonel Haiku (dc1411) — 9/3/2015 @ 12:48 pmI (sort of) get what the feminists are trying to do.
But it’s arrived at the point where one of them will take offense at even the most timid suggestion of risk reduction strategies. Like that helps women.
scrubone (c3104f) — 9/3/2015 @ 1:51 pmAmazon Prime has four pretenders cd for free btw
i need to bet me an echo though
i been here a year and my sound bar is still in the corner
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 2:34 pm*get* me an echo I mean
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 2:35 pmHynde is the composer of “My City Was Gone,” which is used as the theme for the Rush Limbaugh program.
Hopefully, Rush will stop humping Trump long enough to talk about this.
L.N. Smithee (e750c1) — 9/3/2015 @ 2:54 pmChrissie Hynde left the country after the rape. Ran to London to become a rock star. So that worked out.
I prefer the Learning to Crawl album, where she wrote the Rush Limbaugh theme.
That’s shows me something. Most of those rockers, like Jackie Fox (who swallowed up and took the rape by Mr. Big record producer on th chin. Never mentioning it until the dude was dead and buried.) are so terrified that they’ll never work again, that they would try to arm twist a Rush Limbaugh. Force him to stop using their music.
Not Chrissie. That girl is tough. What you going to do to scare her into an Ann Wilson type “Don’t use my song, or the meanies will call my house again” take down order?
Because if you can
papertiger (c2d6da) — 9/3/2015 @ 2:59 pmdrink ram’s piss[survive gang rape], fark, you can drink almost anything.Tough to replace a guitarist as talented as James Honeyman-Scott. First one can’t be beat, so fresh, vital and jumping out of the speakers
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 9/3/2015 @ 5:40 pmChrissie Hynde is cooler than me and after 93 therapy dog sessions I’ve learned to accept this
it is what it is
happyfeet (831175) — 9/3/2015 @ 5:42 pmI think it’s telling that leftists are so about being safe, being careful on every other part of life: wear your seat belt, don’t drink soda, if someone robs you don’t fight back, always wear a life vest, wear a bike helmet–it goes on and on. But safety advice to women to help them avoid rape? That’s completely out of bounds. They even go postal if someone suggests that a woman carry a gun to prevent rape.
It’s almost like they want women to get raped.
Cugel (4b3d0c) — 9/3/2015 @ 6:49 pmIs there any proof, anecdotal or otherwise, that this “gang rape” actually happened??
Gus (7cc192) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:50 pmYes, I’m a victim too. But it was my own fault. It was. You see, back in the 80’s, The entire crew of Dallas Cheerleaders, FORCIBLY BOINKED ME OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
I couldn’t get from THE CAB TO THE CURB without some little CHEERLEADER on my BACK.
True story. Just ask me.
Gus (7cc192) — 9/3/2015 @ 9:53 pmGus – Forget Brass in Pocket, but read the lyrics of the other songs from The Pretenders first album.
Particularly “Precious” – “The Phone Call” – “Up the Neck” and “Tattooed Love Boys” –
She wrote those songs.
What are they about?
It’s a poetical description of a girl who was gang raped, threatened with worse if she talked, then ran to London to escape the situation.
papertiger (c2d6da) — 9/3/2015 @ 11:06 pmPapertiger. Believe whatever nonsense you like.
Gus (7cc192) — 9/3/2015 @ 11:17 pmI’m starting to doubt your cheerleader story. Here is a picture of the ’73 Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.
Kind of a woof brigade. Any of them look familiar?
papertiger (c2d6da) — 9/4/2015 @ 12:09 ampapertiger,
Rather rough don’t you think? That’s someones grandmother your talking about.
Gerald A 11/2006 (2c96c6) — 9/4/2015 @ 4:55 amYou have every right to leave your front door wide open while you are away on holiday and assert your right not to be burgled,
I had a similar discussion with my local police department several years ago when the city I lived in published a newsletter stating that “youths” in the neighborhood were entering garages in broad daylight on weekend afternoons and availing themselves of people’s items. Mostly this was beer, which some people keep in refrigerators in their garage (this being in central Florida). The flyer stated that if we expect to be doing work in our back yard we should close our garage doors because by not doing so this was, and I quote, “an invitation to commit crime”. I contacted our PD to ensure that this is really what they meant and not some mistranslation by the city’s newsletter publisher, who incidentally blew up at me when I asked about this and thus threw the PD under the bus. The nice police PR officer stood by the wording. I asked, purely hypothetically and not that I would do such, if by entering my garage without permission and touching my stuff while not wearing any sort of helmet or other head protection, that such was an invitation to have one’s head bashed in with a Louisville Slugger. He gave me the distinct impression that such would be quite problematic. I asked if a woman paraded down the street stark naked was an “invitation to commit rape”. He reacted as if this was something he hadn’t considered before. Things got awkward after that.
Now were Ms. Hynde to have been presented with the opportunity to bash in the heads of her attackers or pull a knife or a gun and kill them, where would the law be? To some degree she would not be in a position of HAVING to kill them but if she did, what happens?
WTP (4090b3) — 9/4/2015 @ 6:27 amSay, that pic of the ’73 DC cheerleaders… isn’t that Jermaine Jackson, middle row, second from the left?
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 9/4/2015 @ 7:23 amI think that, yeah. I was going to guess Tito, but sure. Jermaine. And there’s a pre M*A*S*H Loretta Swit, back row, far right.
papertiger (c2d6da) — 9/4/2015 @ 11:13 amThere are rape victims who blame themselves unnecessarily. And there are rape victims who take no responsibility for foolish and risky behavior.
It is wrong to say that men cannot be expected to control their impulses – but some cannot or will not, and ignoring this possibility is foolish.
In a perfect world, all drivers would be highly skilled, completely able, and strictly obey all traffic laws. In the real world, we are urged to “drive defensively”.
In a perfect world, hackers would never use easily guessed passwords to break into corporate databases and steal customers’ personal data. In the real world, we condemn IT staffs who don’t replace default passwords.
Incidentally,
WTF? I have never heard of anyone being assaulted for wearing the wrong team jersey… in the U.S. And we’re supposed to be the violent brutes?
Rich Rostrom (d2c6fd) — 9/4/2015 @ 10:36 pmThat brilliant first Pretenders album definitely helps one forget that Chrissy is one of the biggest PETA loudmouths in the biz, almost as much as This Years Model detracts from Elvis Costello’s insipid “anti-Zionism.” Meat is Murder and The Queen is Dead played back to back repeatedly will never in a century overcome what a twat-waffle Morrissey is.
Minister Jack X Klompus (51e48d) — 9/4/2015 @ 11:15 pm