[guest post by Dana]
The answer to the question “What makes a good man?” depends on who you are asking. For one ardent feminist named Lana, her answer would unarguably be that to suggest a man could be good is itself a contradiction in terms and thus, the question is moot. Never the terms shall meet. Because of her misandry, Lana refused to allow her baby boy entry into the world where he would have had the opportunity to prove his mother wrong:
In the spring of 2012, I found out that I was pregnant. I had a good idea who the donator was, but money wasn’t really an issue, and I knew that I would be a good mother-like figure for the child by myself. I have always believed in the right for all women to have a choice in terminating their pregnancy, but when I confirmed the diagnosis about a month into into it, I decided that I WAS ready to have this child.
My journey has taken me to many different places fighting for women’s rights and carrying the banner of the Feminist Movement, even to the point of eschewing a career. One of the more prominent themes that I saw in these places was that men generally would look down on us, refuse to help us, or hardly even lend an ear so that we could air our grievances. This didn’t surprise me, the patriarchy has been well entrenched since the dawn of time, but here I was, here I am, ready to change it.
Seeking to justify her growing distrust and dislike of the patriarchy, she describes an incident early-on that happened on a plane. As she informed a male passenger sitting next to her that she was flying to an Occupy Wall Street rally, he told her “B****** like you need to learn their place”. Lana describes feeling as if “His words had violated both my feelings, and my trust, perhaps as much of a violation as actual physical touch.” Upon being told by the steward that he could not move the man because no violation had actually occurred, Lana reacted:
I was flabbergasted, and then betrayed as they recommended that I move to one of the empty seats. This left me in tears. I knew the only way to get away was to move seats so I did so tearfully and having felt as though I had been verbally and emotionally raped.
By the time we landed, my outlook had changed, I could no longer depend on men to be an ally of the cause.
Of course, Lana had automatically assumed she would have a girl. When she was informed by her doctor that an ultrasound determined she was instead pregnant with a little boy, she was horrified. Her reaction to her “body’s betrayal”? She had an abortion a few days later. Of her decision:
I stand by my decision to abort my baby because it was a male.
I don’t hate men, I hate the patriarchy, what men, and even some women, turn into, I wasn’t going to let that happen with my offspring. The chances were greater that it would with a male, it was unacceptable.
If the curse returns, I would do the exact same thing all over again.
And her response to her critics:
To me, the experience was liberating, the emotions I felt when deciding what I should do, and after learning my fetus was male was something I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Coming out of it a liberated woman though was more than worth it. If I had to do it all
over again, I would do it in a heartbeat.
In her eyes, it was a noble sacrifice: Killing her son was a way to literally become part of the change she wanted to see: the end of the patriarchy.
While most mothers would lay down their lives for their babies in a heartbeat to protect them, no questions asked, this paragon of selfishness instead told her baby, You must die for me so that you don’t become what I don’t like.
With that, Samuel Forrest eloquently demonstrates what a good man is and what the power of love looks like:
“This pediatrician walks out of the room with a little bundle — that was Leo,” Forrest said. “She had his face covered up and hospital authorities wouldn’t let me see him or my wife. When the doctor came out, he said ‘there’s a real problem with your son.’”
Forrest followed doctors and nurses into a room where he’d finally get to meet his baby.
“When I walked into the room they all turned to me and said ‘Leo has Down syndrome,’” he told ABC News. “I had a few moments of shock.”
After the news had sunk in, Forrest held Leo for the very first time.
“They took me in see him and I looked at this guy and I said, he’s beautiful — he’s perfect and I’m absolutely keeping him.”
Soon Forrest walked into his wife’s hospital room with Leo in his arms.
Her reaction was unlike one he ever expected.
“I got the ultimatum right then,” he said. “She told me if I kept him then we would get a divorce.”
Forrest chose his son.
Forrest is a good man. A fine and decent person who likely doesn’t have time to consider the patriarchy or whether some feminist had her feelings hurt by a man, because Forrest chose life. Real life. Diapers, night-feedings, colic, a perfect precious life in an imperfect little body. And Forrest chose sacrifice – a life time of it. And he chose it lovingly, gratefully and with arms and heart wide open.
Thankfully, in one little baby boy’s life, love conquered all.
–Dana
