Gaetz Wingman: You Bet He Paid for Sex with a Minor
The age of the 17-year-old was suspected before but now it has been confirmed, to some extent anyway:
A confession letter written by Joel Greenberg in the final months of the Trump presidency claims that he and close associate Rep. Matt Gaetz paid for sex with multiple women—as well as a girl who was 17 at the time.
“On more than one occasion, this individual was involved in sexual activities with several of the other girls, the congressman from Florida’s 1st Congressional District and myself,” Greenberg wrote in reference to the 17-year-old.
“From time to time, gas money or gifts, rent or partial tuition payments were made to several of these girls, including the individual who was not yet 18. I did see the acts occur firsthand and Venmo transactions, Cash App or other payments were made to these girls on behalf of the Congressman.”
Roger Stone is involved because of course he is.
The letter, which The Daily Beast recently obtained, was written after Greenberg—who was under federal indictment—asked Roger Stone to help him secure a pardon from then-President Donald Trump.
A series of private messages starting in late 2020—also recently obtained by The Daily Beast—shows a number of exchanges between Greenberg and Stone conducted over the encrypted messaging app Signal, with communications set to disappear. However, Greenberg appears to have taken screenshots of a number of their conversations.
Always take screenshots when incriminating yourself! It’s a lesson Trump’s “destroying phone now” fans have learned well.
This is slightly different and more believable than a mere proffer after one has been indicted. But only slightly. We still await more evidence.
At least they apparently did the gentlemanly thing when they found out she was underage – breaking off contact until after her birthday was truly the classy thing to do here.
john (cd2753) — 4/30/2021 @ 9:22 amI’m not hung up on was she a day under or a day over. It’s hard to imagine a 17 or 18 year old that’s taking money for sex when she has any other good choices. A 35 year old man with millions in family money paying an 18 year old for sex is gross and immoral, if not technically criminal.
Time123 (d1bf33) — 4/30/2021 @ 9:36 amI’m pretty certain that in most of the United States, excluding certain parts of Nevada, it is indeed technically criminal to pay anyone for sex.
Manotaur (0c90cd) — 4/30/2021 @ 9:50 am@3, do’oh! you’re right.
Time123 (cd2ff4) — 4/30/2021 @ 9:52 am“From time to time, gas money or gifts, rent or partial tuition payments were made to several of these girls, including the individual who was not yet 18. I did see the acts occur firsthand and Venmo transactions, Cash App or other payments were made to these girls on behalf of the Congressman.”
So much for the days of ‘free love’… gosh-darn those “free market,’ enterprising young lady capitalists:
Reaganomics!
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 10:03 amI gather that the stout Republican defense of Gaetz, that what he did was technically not illegal, and thus purely an issue for his voters, is starting to crumble. I’m not sure that that would not have been a bad defense – if it’s a question of sleaziness instead of illegality, it’s not something really worth a national interest. I just wish that that hypocrisy and lying were not so shrugged at. I.e. next time Gaetz makes some sort of pronouncement regarding morality, or demanded that his credibility be respected, he should simply be mocked.
Victor (4959fb) — 4/30/2021 @ 10:31 amSo that what that fist bump by Liz Cheney with joe Biden was about!
nk (1d9030) — 4/30/2021 @ 10:51 amToo bad Cheney isn’t a recently re-elected senator and in for 5.75 more years like Ossoff.
urbanleftbehind (d0a46f) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:27 ammay they throw the book at gaetz, and unlike epstein it’s not a checkbook
JF (e1156d) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:27 amLoyalty, to Trump, is a one-way street with sh1t flowing the other way.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:42 amVictor, I’m pretty sure the age of consent in FL is 18.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:43 amIt’s hard to imagine a 17 or 18 year old that’s taking money for sex when she has any other good choices.
But some 18 yo women do imagine it.
I’m pretty certain that in most of the United States, excluding certain parts of Nevada, it is indeed technically criminal to pay anyone for sex.
But you can buy them dinner and it’s something else.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:47 am12.It’s hard to imagine a 17 or 18 year old that’s taking money for sex when she has any other good choices.
Like a minimum wage, burger-flipping job.
Ketchup Soup!!!!!
Reaganomics!
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:52 am@7. So that what that fist bump by Liz Cheney with joe Biden was about!
You’re kidding, right? Nod, nod; wink, wink: ROYALISTS:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSpOjj4YD8c
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 11:59 amRoyalists and Reagan. It’s so obvious guys!
Why does Ronald Reagan keep doing it?
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:02 pmPresident Plagiarist is in Philly blowing his horn about Amtrak.
“It’s a bargain; it’s economical!” -President Plagiarist, 4/30/2021 3:05 PM EDT
IDIOT.
‘Amtrak has lost money every year since 1970.’ – source, businessinsider.com
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:08 pmHe’s got a point. Gaetz’s sex crimes are really, at root, about Joe Biden’s plagiarism. We should focus on that… it’s definitely the best way to stop another Trumpy sexually abusive nutcase. Shine that light on plagiarism, for maximum justice.
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:17 pm@16. Evildoers gotta evil do, Dustin; idle hands are the devil’s wokshop- and his have been idle for over 20 years.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:37 pm“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to change the subject.”
Trump should have had no chance, and he didn’t until the subject was Obama being secretly from Africa and Russia flooding the world with whatabout nutcases. And because of Trump, America is in steep decline. Anyone who tries to flip that causation around is unclear about what leadership is.
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:40 pmWhat’s really weird is that the shrugging at hypocrisy and lying and sleaziness on the right has been done, in substantial measure, in the name of protecting the “religious values” that are being cruelly mocked by Coastal Elites.
People who claim to be deeply concerned about moral decay and the scourge of secularism decided that the one true champion of their values was a sociopath who exploits religion and morality as instruments of self-aggrandizement. And they told us that if we tried to hold that person to the moral standards they claim to cherish, then we are part of the devil’s army (as Adam Kinzinger’s relatives put it). No wonder that Trump-loyal pols think they shouldn’t need to be decent people themselves while they pose as defenders of conservative values.
Trumpism basically turned hypocrisy into the cardinal virtue of conservatism.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:40 pmPlagiarism is the root of all evil. Didn’t we learn that in Sunday School?
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:42 pm@22. Plagiarism is the root of all evil. Didn’t we learn that in Sunday School?
You should have: Exodus 20:15– The Eighth Commandment; Thou Shall Not Steal
Certainly a stumble-bummed, Irish-Catholic should have ad it smacked into him by ruler-wielding nuns or priests eyeing him over for some backdoor choir practice.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 12:52 pmI think I’m going to set up a DCSCA-bot.
Reaganomics! Plagiarist! Uh, I’m trying to think of something else he says.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:08 pmDustin, what elected Trump wasn’t Putin or birtherism, it was Hillary collapsing and pretending she hadn’t.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:10 pmI would rate stealing someone else’s words as less serious than what Donald Trump has done to other people with his fake charity, or steering public funds to his properties at inflated cost, or cheating other people out of money he agreed by contact to pay (sometimes ruining their livelihoods in the process), or pushing the cost of his failures onto other people in bankruptcy, or the way his campaign tricked people into making recurrent payments, etc.
There’s also no virtue in stealing credit for other people’s work. Trump wants people to give him exclusive credit for the work that other people did to develop vaccines, e.g.
Joe Biden is not without sin. Neither are you, I reckon. But Joe Biden’s sins are small by comparison with Donald Trump’s. I could replace Biden’s name countless others and it would still be true.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:12 pmGaetz is a Congressman. No year goes by without at least one of them with his, um, hand in the cookie jar. Prediction: His district will elect someone just like him. Unless he’s the candidate in which case his opponent serves for 2 years and then they lelect someone just like Gaetz.
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:12 pmGood luck with that.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:13 pmJoe Biden’s sins are manifold, since his worldview is completely wrong. But as far as theft is concerned Biden’s desire to steal trillions and trillions from younger generations, going further and further in hock to the Chinese to pay for pre-K and other non-urgent “needs” is far worse than anything Trump or Bush or Obama or any of them did.
DCSCA will talk about Reagan, but when Reagan left office the debt was about $2 trillion. Biden has borrowed that in his first 100 days.
W double the debt over 8 eyars from $5T to $10T. Obama doubled it again in 8 years from $10T to $20T. Trump only added 35% in 4 years, to $27T. Biden is off to the races.
At some point it must stop. One way or the other.
You cannot
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:24 pm*
Kevin M (ab1c11) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:25 pmYou cannothttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7BNMrybHO4&t=85s&ab_channel=stylernyc
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:57 pmKevin,
I think we’re agreed. If the age of consent is 18, and the woman was over 18, it’s sleazy not illegal. I think the current question is whether she was under or over 18 when the sex happened. But I still think sleazy should be enough to scorn Gaetz.
Victor (4959fb) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:19 pm@29. Cash in any Gulf War bonds lately?
Reaganomics.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:36 pmKevin,
I think we’re agreed. If the age of consent is 18, and the woman was over 18, it’s sleazy not illegal. I think the current question is whether she was under or over 18 when the sex happened. But I still think sleazy should be enough to scorn Gaetz.
Age doesn’t matter if Gaetz transported the woman, or paid for her transportation, across state lines:
Rip Murdock (d2a2a8) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:42 pm@24. Facts are stubborn things. The “conservative” Republican who admits trickle down was totally fvcked up, takes responsibility for the Reagan Wreckage– and for creatin the cesspool that spawned Trump,is the party future. Until then, they’re swamp cretins in denial. Next phase, flipping Texas to wholly purple then full blue.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:43 pm@32. Ah, hell, in France he’d be a top contender for President.
Who cares who he screwed and was sucker enough to pay for it. It’s like sleeping with Herman Munster. Unless those who do care are jealous.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:46 pm@26. I would rate stealing someone else’s words as less serious…
Really…hmmm. Then no doubt you wholly supported the Biden presidential bid in 1988 even though plagiarism killed his candidacy.
Character is supposed to count with “conservatives.” Squinty, swampy, President Plagiarist has none.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:54 pmYou are changing the subject from sexually exploiting a teenager, DCSCA. You’re saying that Biden stealing some words he used in 1988 is more important. You don’t actually believe that.
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 2:59 pmPeople who claim to be deeply concerned about moral decay and the scourge of secularism decided that the one true champion of their values was a sociopath who exploits religion and morality as instruments of self-aggrandizement.
So true, and so well put.
norcal (01e272) — 4/30/2021 @ 3:17 pmReaganomics! Plagiarist! Uh, I’m trying to think of something else he says.
Good luck with that.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 1:13 pm
I don’t know if I’ve ever laughed so hard while reading this site.
Radegunda, you’re on fire today!
norcal (01e272) — 4/30/2021 @ 3:18 pm@26 biden supporters naturally want to focus on the personal sins of a president which impact virtually no one rather than policy sins that impact everyone
cuz who wants to defend the intentional mess on the border, a federal government dressed as santa, and performative social distancing and mask wearing while a mutant strain is allowed to enter from india with no travel restrictions
these can’t be sins of course, because you voted for them
JF (e1156d) — 4/30/2021 @ 3:42 pm@38. So you’re striking a blow against the morality of commerce; free market capitalism. Got it. 😉
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 3:43 pmI don’t know if I’ve ever laughed so hard while reading this site.
You’ll laugh harder sohard, you’ll cry when you listen to President Plagiarist tout the financial success of Amtrak today.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 3:45 pmyes, laughter is basically the most fundamental form of plagiarism, if you think about it.
BTW Gaetz is still a creeper.
Dustin (4237e0) — 4/30/2021 @ 4:10 pmConfirmation of the evidence seems ongoing or that investigators are holding what they have close to vest.
However, how much stock can you put on someone admitting to a crime who’s also fingering a powerful figure culpability? Could it be a defense tactic to lie about that in order to seek a favorable deal with the Biden justice department?
whembly (ae0eb5) — 4/30/2021 @ 4:17 pmYou are wholly wrong in making that assumption.
Character doesn’t count with Trumpist “conservatives.” For the last five years they’ve been deeply hostile to the people who still think character matters in leadership. Any Trumper complaint about Biden’s character flaws is laughably hollow.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 5:18 pmAnd it took only four words! There might be a lesson in that.
Radegunda (ebfa91) — 4/30/2021 @ 5:22 pmOnly Donald Trump could have gotten Joe Biden elected President.
PS I wouldn’t mind if Kevin wrote a bot of me saying only that.
nk (1d9030) — 4/30/2021 @ 5:23 pm44.yes, laughter is basically the most fundamental form of plagiarism, if you think about it.
LOL, actually, Dustin, if you think about it, sex is.
So Gaetz is a fundamental, base level plagiarist. 😉
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 5:57 pmHe’s a jerkoff who has to pay for it. Like his role model.
nk (1d9030) — 4/30/2021 @ 6:44 pm@51. Everybody pays for it, nk– in one way or another.
DCSCA (f4c5e5) — 4/30/2021 @ 7:34 pmI can understand the attraction to teenage girls. I just think access to them should be limited to teenage boys.
I dated a lot of girls when I was in high school, a lot. But I had an ironclad rule: only date girls from other high schools. The reason for this rule was because on the first day of school freshman year I got to sit at the drama and band table with the cool kids, the in crowd. I’m sitting there, listening to them gossip. Do you know who so-and-so went out with? She’s such a slut! Do you know what so-and-so did to his girlfriend? He’s such an asshole! I thought, these are the cool kids? I had already seen the list of tournament the drama squad went to every year, 30 in all, so I figured I would just meet girls from other schools and go out with them.
See, I had a distinct advantage. For my fourteenth birthday, I had taken the money I had earned over seven years of grounds keeping and pool cleaning at the apartment complex, and mowing lawns and cleaning houses at my mother’s listings–it was a lot of work, but I had saved a lot of money, a little over $3,000, which is a lot a lot of money to a teenager–and bought myself a motorcycle. I figured I should reward myself. It was my money, after all.
I picked the nicest motorcycle on the show room floor, a red Honda 100cc on-off street-dirt bike. But I went all out, added extended front forks, chrome wheels, big knobby tires, and a custom black leather seat with a passenger seat and a back rest, and two red helmets. Then I rode to the military supply store and bought a brown leather flight jacket and aviator sunglasses. Next I rode to the boot store and bought brown leather boots, with square toes and ankle buckles, and a brown leather belt with a bronze buckle. Just add faded jeans and a black t-shirt, and I was South Texas Fonzarelli.
Of course, I didn’t ride my motorcycle or wear that outfit to school. The kids would have all laughed at me, like who do you think you are, the Fonz? But I could meet a girl at a tournament and simpley mention something about the pool, like I have get up early in the morning and clean the pool. You have a pool? Well, there’s a pool at the apartment complex, and I have to maintain it. You’re perfectly welcome to come over go for a swim. I’d have to have my parents drop me off. Or I could pick you up on my motorcycle. You have a motorcycle? Yeah, I’d be happy to give you a ride on any Sunday.
It’s the ultimate bad boy date. A motorcycle ride with the Fonz, and afternoon in the pool, then back to my apartment. She would shower and change in the bathroom, while I changed in my bedroom. She would come in, all fresh and smiling. Let me just grab my jacket, and I’ll take you home. We don’t have to leave right now! No, we don’t. Pleas have a seat. I had cleverly put a loveseat for two in my bedroom. Lock the door. Do you like the Beatles? Put on some music and sit down beside her to make out.
It was so easy. There wasn’t a high school girl in America who would turn down a date like that. Meanwhile, the kids at school, especially the girls, kept trying to get me to date this or that girl. She really likes you. They were playing matchmaker. But I would just make up an excuse. I have a lot of work to do at the apartment complex, between that and rehearsals and homework, I don’t have time to date. Don’t you like girls? Are you gay? Psst. I was dating fifteen girls from five different high schools before the end of my freshman year. I just didn’t want anyone to know it. Where we go, what we say and do together is our business and our business alone. It is not the subject of cafeteria gossip.
Then on my fifteenth birthday, my father took me to the DMV, got me a hardship driver’s license, gave ,e a car. It was his old Toyota; he had bought himself a Corvette Stingray. He dangled the keys in mace, and said, son, if I give you this car, I want you to promise me that you won’t get married until you’ve graduated from college and gotten a job. I promise, Dad. I had to work for it, of course, drive my sister and brothers to and from school, run errands for my mother, cook breakfast and dinner every day, but I didn’t care. I had a car before my sophomore year. Two-thirds of the senior didn’t have a car. This greatly expanded my dating range.
On the first day of drama in came these three girls. I knew them, they were friends of my sister. They had been coming over to swim for years. I never dated or touched them, because I was like an older brother to them. At the first tournament, we were sitting in the cafeteria, when one of them said, that girl is looking at you. I turned around and saw this gorgeous girl, then I turned back around and said, what would a girl like that want with a guy like me? Don’t be silly, and they all three got up, walked over and brought her back with them and introduced me to her. Okay, I got to get a plan working on this.
When we got back to school, I offered to give them a ride home. Along the way, we made an unspoken agreement. I was to be their personal chauffer. Anytime you girls need a ride somewhere, just give me a call. Then it was, can you take us to the mall? Sure. Can you take us to the live stock show? No problem. Can you take us to the beach? Absolutely. No matter where I took them, and at every tournament, they would find some cute girl and introduce me to her. Their idea was to keep me occupied, so they could run around and chase boys, which was fine by me.
By the end of my junior year, I had a black book with over 300 names, addresses and phone numbers, divided by high schools, in thirty cities in South Texas, including Austin, San Antonio and Corpus Christi, south east to the Rio Grande Valley. So I packed up my best clothes, told my mother I was going to visit my grandparents, stopped by the bank and withdrew a couple thousand dollars, then hit the road. I had everything I needed, money, clothes, a car, maps, and a black book. If I came to a city, I didn’t have maps for, simply stop by the Chamber of Commerce. Hey, free maps and brochures.
My plan was simple. Drive into town, check into a hotel, start making phone calls and going on dates. Usually, it was just for dinner, sometimes for lunch, but there is always someplace interesting to go and have fun. I would go over the brochure, saying I’m on vacation, think of me as a tourist, what’s the best place to go? Or maybe there was a party at one of her friend’s house.
As it began to get dark or it was already nightfall, she would say, I don’t want you to dive at night. There’s an extra bed in my brothers room. Thank you, but I checked into a hotel. You have a hotel room? Yeah, I don’t like driving in the dark. I want to see it, as if she didn’t believe me. It’s just a hotel. I want to see it! Okay, let’s go. We would walk into the room. She would look around and immediately went to the phone. Mother, I’m staying over at whosever’s house for a sleep over. Then, she would call her friend and say, if my mother calls, tell her I’m in the shower and call me back at this number. She would turn to me smiling, with open arms. It was so easy. Wake up in the morning, take her to breakfast, then drive her home.
On to the next town, check into a hotel, start making phone calls and going on dates. I was the baddest bad boy in the state, the summer of 78. Of course, I called home once or twice, so my parents would know I was safe. My mother demanded to know, where are you? Well, I’m in this or that city. I thought you were going to visit your grandparents. I am, but along the way I thought I would stop by and visit some friends. Come home this instant! I will come home eventually, but I’m on summer vacation. Call you in a few days.
I just kept executing my plan, going from town to town, making phone calls and going on dates. Finally, I made it to my grandparents in San Antonio and called my mother from there. I told you I was going to visit my grandparents. Come home immediately! I’ll come home when my summer vacation is over. I slept at my grandparent’s house that night, then checked into a hotel. I still had San Antonio and Austin to do, and the long trip back on my itinerary. I just kept going and going, till the money ran out.
When I did make it back home, after two and a half months, my mother was really, really pissed. I had never seen her so mad. Where have you been? What have you been doing? Then my father said, son, explain yourself. Can we talk in private, Dad? So, we went into my bedroom and closed the door. I showed him the maps, with my itinerary drawn in ink, and the black book. He was the only one besides me who ever saw the black book. These are towns I went to and these are the girls I dated, checked of with a pen. (I didn’t tell that the little stars were for the ones I had sex with, but I think he knew.)
He looked at me in astonishment and said, I’m proud of you son. Then he took the black book and walked out the door, down the hall, across the living room, down the hall, out onto the patio, where he started a fire in the barbeque pit. I went running after him, hey that’s my book! When I realized what he was going to do, I pleaded with him, c’mon Dad, there’s a lot of girls in that book. He gave me the look and threw into the fire. He burned it. He kept adding lighter fluid, until there as nothing left but ashes.
Oh, man! I watched in horror as every girl I knew went up in flames. I don’t know what he told my mother afterwards, but she was mad with a fury, because I basically wasted my college savings, driving around the state, getting laid by drama girls. I don’t think she ever forgave me, but she sure knew how to punish me. More work around the complex, more and more houses to clean, and I had to get an after school job, constant work until I made all the money all the money I had spent and more. This continued through the next summer.
Needless to say, that was the end of my high school dating career. My mother made damn sure I didn’t have time for girls. It was torture.
But I’d do it again, damn right. That was the greatest summer of my life.
In furtherance of my advice to norcal on how to date a young woman and get laid. Be the guy who is not like every other guy. Be a man and let her come to you.
Gawain's Ghost (b25cd1) — 5/1/2021 @ 12:11 amSerendipity! And just when I thought Gawain’s Ghost had been intimidated into sealing the history books!
Awesome story.
I was like you when it came to working as a teenager, Gawain’s Ghost. I started working full time during the summers when I was 13. I worked at a hospital where my dad was an accountant. He arranged for me to be a groundskeeper. Because I was underage, I was paid out of petty cash. I made $10 a day (for about nine hours of work on average). This was in 1977.
I did the same thing at another hospital in southern Utah, only this time I was on the payroll, and it included time in the fall (and maybe spring, too).
When I graduated from high school in 1981, I had almost $10,000 in savings. It was a lot of money for a teenager back then.
Unlike you, I didn’t spend it on any girls. I was raised Mormon, so that stuff was verboten.
Thank you for sharing your history and insights.
norcal (01e272) — 5/1/2021 @ 12:54 amMy response to Gawain’s Ghost is in moderation. Why?
norcal (01e272) — 5/1/2021 @ 12:56 amI see it, norcal. Maybe the ‘I made money’ reference.
Dustin (4237e0) — 5/1/2021 @ 10:47 amThe worst part of it, norcal, was my mother said, no more drama tournaments for you. So I couldn’t even start over with my plan. Nothing but work for me. I couldn’t even try out for the one act play, because the rehearsals where held at night, when I was working. All day Saturday, all day Sunday, and during the week, hours working at my after school job. My senior year was tortuously boring. I was limited to school plays, during school hours. What fun is that? I wasn’t about to go out with any girl at this high school, because of my iron clad rule, and because I didn’t have the time. I couldn’t go on a date, even if I wanted to. This was my mother’s severe punishment, and it got worse over the summer. Since I wasn’t in school, I had graduated, she worked me all day long every day, and I still had my evening job. Work, work, work, work, work.
I did manage to escape from this tortuous regiment one day and go on one date. But you won’t believe how.
Those three girls, the ones would find girls and introduce me to them so they could chase boys–that was over–they came to school one day, really pissed. One of them had found out that her boyfriend was going out with a girl from another school. So? She was going out with like ten guys from other schools she met at tournaments. That didn’t matter. Her boyfriend was cheating on her, and she wanted not just revenge but total humiliation.
Pick us up at after school. I can’t. I have a job, and I won’t get off work until 10:00. Pick us up at 10:30 then. I had to, because that was our secret agreement. I was their personal chauffer, would drive them wherever they wanted to go, and they would introduce me to girls. I had no choice, because that was our pact. Even though I was practically out of drama, I had to honor our agreement.
So, I got off work at 10;00, drove to the one girl’s house, got there around 10:30. They were waiting for me outside. When I arrive, the scrambled into the car and said, drive! Where do you want go? Nowhere, just drive! Okay. I didn’t know what was going on, so I just drove around, taking the back roads mostly.
See, my car was there secret hiding place, where they could plot there devious revenge. Hey, what is said in the car stays in the car. I asked them what they were talking about. Shut up and drive! Okay. I didn’t home till 12:00. This went on for several weeks, and you cannot possibly imagine how vicious their revenge plot became.
They were talking to their friends, spreading rumors, forming a conspiracy, and every night I drove them around, listening as their plot unfolded. This was their plan.
She would invite her cheating boyfriend to meet her in the cafeteria, because she had a special surprise for him. Everyone had told him so. Once he sat down beside her, BAM!, she would smash him in the face with a lunch tray, knocking him over. The other two would scramble over the table, and all three would kick him, hit him, slap him, scratch him, pull his hair, then they would grab squirt bottles of ketchup and mustard and squirt them all over him, keep kicking, hitting, slapping, scratching, pulling his hair, then they would take little bags of chicken feathers and dump them all over him, keep kicking, hitting, slapping, scratching him, pulling his hair, then walk away.
Friday was to be the day. I heard it all when I drove them around Thursday night. I couldn’t sleep. I just lied in bed, shaking my head, thinking my God, what a nightmare. So I got up early, made breakfast, c’mon, c’mon, I got a lot to do today, so let’s get started early. I drove my brothers and sister to school. I arrived at the school at around 7:30, and sat down alone in the auditorium.
I kept thinking, this is really going to happen, because these girls are determined. I got to get ought of here. So I wrote the most obviously fake excuse letter ever. Please excuse my son from school for the day. He has a doctor’s appointment. Then I forged my mother’s signature. I went to the office and gave the secretary and said I have a doctor’s appointment. Are you sick. No, it’s just a routine physical, and I need to make sure I have all the required vaccines for college admission. But you know how long the waiting line is at the doctor’s office is. I don’t know how long it will take, could be all day. I understand, she said, unbelievably stamped approval on the letter, and gave me a day pass.
Oh, thank God. As I was walking toward the parking lot, who should come out of the back of a car? The cheating boyfriend, of course, his parents were dropping him off. Hey, dude, he said. I wanted to tell him. I wanted to warn him. But I couldn’t, I was sworn to secrecy. Hey, man, I got a day pass and I’m going to the beach. Want to come? I tried to save him. No, my girlfriend has a special surprise for me at lunch. You poor dumb fool, I thought, got in my car and left.
I drove to Harlingen and walked into the auditorium. What are you doing here? she asked. She was one of the drama girls in my now burned to ashes black book. One of my favorites actually, she had two stars by her name. Let’s just say we had enjoyed an intimate date together the year before.
Well, I got a day pass, and I’m on my way to the beach. Just thought I would stop by and say hello. You’re going to the beach? Can I go? I don’t want you to get in trouble for skipping school. Don’t be silly, she said, and sat down and wrote a much better fake excuse letter than I ever could. She went to the office and came back in less than ten minutes with her own free pass. Okay, let’s go to the beach.
I drove her to Padre Island, stopped by a gift shop. I bought us both swimwear and souvenir t-shirts, and a beach towel of course. We changed in separate showers, then went frolicking in the surf. We swam and laughed and played, splashing each other. Then we walked up the beach, holding hands, found a nice hidden spot in the dunes, laid down the beach towel, and made love. It was all in fun, but I was on a tight schedule. I had to be back home in time for my evening job. She understood that. So we ran back to the showers and changed, enjoyed a delightful meal together, then I drove her home.
That was the only date I went on my entire senior year, and it was beautiful. Finally, some fun in my life. I got back home just in time to get back to work.
Over the weekend, silence. Nobody called me. I went to school on Monday. Then it was like, dude, where you Friday? I had a doctor’s appointment. You won’t believe what happened in the cafeteria! I don’t want to hear about it. Dude, these three girls went totally ballistic on this guy! I don’t want to hear about it. I don’t want to know about it. I was at the doctor’s office all day.
I had to establish at least the appearance of plausible deniability. If anyone found out that I knew what was going what was going to happen and didn’t tell anyone, I could be charged as a co-conspirator. And if anyone found out that I wasn’t really in the doctor’s office, but instead was having sex on the beach with a high school girl, that would have been worse. There’s no telling what kind of charges they would have filed against me. I had to stick to my story, because I needed plausible deniability.
They did it. They actually went through with their revenge plan. What happened to the girls? Suspended for the rest of the year. What happened to the boyfriend? Transferred to another school. What happened to me? Nothing. I wasn’t there, don’t know what happened. The girls weren’t going to talk. I surely wasn’t going to talk. What is said in the car stays in the car. I had plausible deniability, based on the excuse letter which the secretary approved. I was at the doctor’s office. Now, if anyone had checked with the doctor’s office, I would have been screwed. But no one did, so I walked away clean. If anyone had, I certainly wouldn’t have told them about what I did, a gentleman never tells. I would have just said, I went driving around. And dared them to prove otherwise.
It just goes to show that high school girls are really fun. They’re so happy, cheerful, and full of energy, great to be around. They’re also the most vicious animals on the planet. You do not want to mess with them.
Gawain's Ghost (336140) — 5/1/2021 @ 1:38 pmWow, GG. That was a roller coaster of a story!
You’re right. Women can be so wonderful, and yet turn so ruthless.
norcal (01e272) — 5/1/2021 @ 2:58 pm