The “Modern Man” vs. A Real Modern Man
[guest post by Dana]
This week there was a silly bit of absurdity in the Men’s Style Section of the New York Times. Tagged as Self-Help, the piece describes the “Modern Man” in all of his feminized glory:
Being a modern man today is no different than it was a century ago. It’s all about adhering to principle. Sure, fashion, technology and architecture change over time, as do standards of etiquette, not to mention ways of carrying oneself in the public sphere. But the modern man will take the bits from the past that strike him as relevant and blend them with the stuff of today.
Here are a few of the 27 examples of the unattractive and unappealing “modern man”:
When the modern man buys shoes for his spouse, he doesn’t have to ask her sister for the size. And he knows which brands run big or small.
*The modern man uses the proper names for things. For example, he’ll say “helicopter,” not “chopper” like some gauche simpleton.
The modern man has hardwood flooring. His children can detect his mood from the stamp of his Kenneth Cole oxfords.
On occasion, the modern man is the little spoon. Some nights, when he is feeling down or vulnerable, he needs an emotional and physical shield.
Does the modern man have a melon baller? What do you think? How else would the cantaloupe, watermelon and honeydew he serves be so uniformly shaped?
**The modern man has no use for a gun. He doesn’t own one, and he never will.
The modern man cries. He cries often.
Oh dear God. Does anyone doubt that the modern man’s melon balls are kept in his wife’s purse, only to be let out when she deems it necessary?
Now, while I realize this is in the fluff section of the NYT and should not to be taken seriously-under any circumstance-it nonetheless speaks to the efforts made by women to remake men into their own idealized image of manliness: softer, less formidable, less aggressive, less of a risk taker, more pliable, more emotional (hence, all that endless crying…) and certainly, a strong sense of guilt and shame for their basic hard-wiring. As we can see by the list, women are winning, especially when considering how closely the modern man resembles a woman… with a penis.
Anyway, it’s pretty hard not to contrast the NYT divorced-from-reality version of the “modern man” with this real-life modern man:
An Army veteran who bravely blocked the door as the Oregon gunman barged into a community college classroom Thursday, then took at least five bullets while pleading that it was his young son’s birthday, is recovering – and being hailed as a hero, according to his family.
Chris Mintz, 30, a North Carolina native who had moved to the Roseburg, Ore., area and is studying at Umpqua Community College to become a fitness trainer, hurled himself against the door in an effort to stop the gunman, identified as Christopher Harper Mercer, from entering. When Mercer, who killed at least nine people and injured at least seven before being killed by police, shot his way inside, hitting Mintz at least three time, the former soldier called out that it was his son Tyrek’s sixth birthday, according to Mintz’s aunt. His plea was rewarded with two more shots, Wanda Mintz told The Daily Beast.
None of the five shots that hit Mintz struck any vital organs, and he is expected to recover. “His vital signs are OK. He’s going to have to learn to walk again,” cousin Ariana Earnhardt told Q13Fox, “but he walked away with his life and that’s more than so many other people did.”
This modern man appears to have remained defiant in the face of our current cultural norms for males. I’m talking about that which is more deeply embedded in men, or at least used to be: the belief in duty to protect fellow-citizens, and the drive to run toward danger rather than run from it. As David French emphatically states: Men have a duty to defend the weak and the vulnerable. Mintz did his duty under the worst possible circumstances. We should all salute him — and pray that we could show similar courage if the worst happens in our own lives. Just recently, we witnessed the heroic acts of other men like Mintz. At one time in our culture, this reaction was a given. However, along with the re-definition of modern men, this once-given inclination also seems to be going by the wayside and in its place, a less risky, more self-serving approved of behavior.
And while it’s quite possible that the courageous Mintz owns a melon-baller and may use it with artistic flair and precision, I’m sure we can all agree that his melon balls have not been confiscated by a woman, nor would they fit in her purse anyway.
On the upside, thanks to the New York Times’ highly informative look at what constitutes the modern man, I was able to learn that I am the proud parent of a “gauche simpleton” who clearly fails the NYT modern man litmus test: Last night, my son who is a Marine, stopped by after having been away at sea for several weeks in preparation for a long deployment. I cringed as he referred to helicopters as “birds” and described the difficulty of squeezing his 6’4″ gear-laden frame into his seat while holding his machine gun between his legs.
Oh, God. *Using an improper term and having a **gun!!!
It’s true, parenting is not for the fainthearted.
I shared the NYT list with him so that he could courageously strive to become a modern man. He grinned, then apologized for being such a disappointment to me. I just hope I can move past it.
–Dana
Hello.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:04 pmI read that article, Dana, shook my head and moved on. Eisenhower complained about the Military/Industrial Complex. I complain about the Education/Entertainment Complex today. Their description is not that of a modern man, it’s that of a pussified wimp. I’m happy as hell to hear about your son since I’ve found it almost impossible to find a real man under 45.
Some day these leftist idiots are going to need a real man and none will report for duty. Like I said, we went from John Wayne and Reagan to Pajama Boy and Hussein in a generation. The leftists are winning.
Hoagie™ (f4eb27) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:13 pmMy sons are the “run to danger” types, Hoagie. They take after their dad. It simultaneously makes me proud as heck and scared to death.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:17 pmThis pic says it all. Classic, but worth repeating.
Gazzer (7baf28) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:20 pmhttp://elenaives.com/2011/07/11/obama-reagan-if-not-now-when/
Or this Man:
Liviu Librescu (Romanian pronunciation: [ˈlivju liˈbresku]; Hebrew: ליביו ליברסקו; August 18, 1930 – April 16, 2007) was a Romanian-born Israeli scientist and engineer. He was a professor whose major research fields were aeroelasticity and aerodynamics. A prominent academic in addition to being a survivor of the Holocaust, he is most widely known for his actions during the Virginia Tech shootings, in which he held off the gunman, giving all but one of his students enough time to escape through the windows.
Shot and killed during the attack, Librescu was posthumously awarded the Order of the Star of Romania, Romania’s highest civilian honor. At the time of his death, he was Professor of Engineering Science and Mechanics at Virginia Tech.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liviu_Librescu
Kevin M (25bbee) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:37 pmThis modern man is Air Assault qualified, which means that he rappelled out of a chopper, with a gun, careful to affix the harness so as to not bruise those definitively not melon balls. Ooo-rah (No “H” in that, so Army)
ChrisB (b69997) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:40 pmLibrescu was well trained in weapons in the Israeli army, but like all other people on the Virginia Tech campus, he was unable to legally carry a weapon on the grounds. Had he had one, he and any number of other students would be alive today.
Kevin M (25bbee) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:40 pmI would like to see movement in red states to require weapons training in high school for both sexes, subject only to RFRA-type objections.
Kevin M (25bbee) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:44 pmThe modern male NY Times writer has made a certain number of compromises to pursue his craft:
* He has agreed to live in a 380 square foot apartment which he can afford, and has no room for a proper TV & stereo system.
* His wardrobe consists only of his work clothes and some casual attire (certainly no hunting clothes, or formal wear, a suit and tie collection, or Western attire).
* He has no room for an in-home bar beyond a bottle of vodka in the freezer and an unopened bottle of high-end bourbon in the pantry.
* He does not own a car (can’t afford it) and only rents one once a year when he drives up to New England for a clambake, so he is wholly dependent upon someone else (public transportation, taxis, or ride sharing) to get around.
* He works in an environment where he is constantly in danger of saying something sexist/classist/racist/heternormative. Not that he ever would, of course, but he makes sure to self-censor all the same.
* He knows better than to ask out a successful career-oriented woman (that would be patriarchal), so he’ll wait around for her to invite him to a feminist poetry reading where he can impress her by telling her how moved he was by the plight of women in modern society. If they decide to marry it will not be after a proposal from him, it will be mutually agreed upon over a glass of chardonnay at that really expensive Himalayan Restaurant they both like.
* He plays no contact sport, nor any sport where scores are kept or participants are ranked. Instead, he stays in shape by riding his bicycle, doing yoga, and abstaining from carbs.
* He follows sports just enough to make small-talk about the yankees, Mets, Giants, Jets, Knicks, Nets, and Rangers (certainly not the Islanders), but he knows nothing beyond the names of the three best players on each team and what the result of the most recent game was.
* He has learned nothing of self-defense, won’t own a weapon of any sort (beyond the iron bar that holds his apartment door shut), trusts the police to protect him, but wishes they wouldn’t treat minority males so harshly. He doesn’t interact with any young minority males ever, but it isn’t because he doesn’t support their struggles.
So, yeah, given all of that I’m not too interested in what this dude has to say about manliness.
JVW (ba78f9) — 10/3/2015 @ 1:59 pmI agree with you about Mintz. Raising boys, it’s interesting to see how the schools describe men.
But the SF and F author Larry Correia is a human honeybadger, and fisks the heck out of the NYT column (language warning):
http://monsterhunternation.com/2015/10/02/fisking-the-new-york-times-modern-man/
I think that our culture wants sheep. That’s okay, so long as we have sheepdogs to keep the wolves at bay. Like Mintz. And Librescu.
Simon Jester (c8876d) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:01 pmInstead, he stays in shape by riding his bicycle, doing yoga, and abstaining from carbs.
Hey, JVW, quit your patriarchal insults. This is how I stay in shape!
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:11 pmDana, I bet that JVW keeps the temperature low in the workout room, which is anti-feminist.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNH0bmYT7os
The Patriarchy is icy cold!
Simon Jester (c8876d) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:22 pmTo YOU and your Marine: Semper Fi! OOORAH!!
reff (ad1e4f) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:25 pmYou Neanderthals so make me want to cross my arms, stamp my foot, and grimace. If you could only see me tossing my my head and flouncing. So there!
nk (9faaca) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:26 pmSimon Jester,
As a “modern” woman, all I can say is if I were young, unattached and read that list, I would be sticking my head in an oven because of the desperation overtaking me. I don’t know any women who want men to be like that. Women like men that are smart, witty, healthy, full-bodied, hard-bodied, strong, forceful, gentle, kind and polite. We don’t want to be with women. (Well, most of us anyway.) There is nothing more thrilling than a man who knows his way around a gun or an engine or the study of logic as easily as he knows his way around a woman.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:29 pmDana, I bet that JVW keeps the temperature low in the workout room, which is anti-feminist.
Uh-oh, they’re on to me!
JVW (ba78f9) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:33 pmyou need the baller for to make a watermelon caprese plus melon is a fun garnish for martinis and other drinks
but is not essential i don’t have one right now and you know what it’s all good
happyfeet (831175) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:37 pmNo way the idiot article was written by a man. It smacks of a committee effort with all the attendant diversity representatives in full-throated attendance, intent on advancing today’s burning social issue of the century.
ropelight (f0afa2) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:38 pmropelight,
According to the NYT’s blurb about the author: Brian Lombardi lives in DeKalb, Ill., with his wife, Linda, and their three children.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:42 pmA Muslim, a black, and a feminist walk into a bar. [Content removed by administrator due to complaints.]
nk (9faaca) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:43 pmYou Neanderthals so make me want to cross my arms, stamp my foot, and grimace. If you could only see me tossing my my head and flouncing. So there!
nk (9faaca) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:26 pm
Just take those shiny, tasseled loafers off before you scratch the wood floors, nk.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:44 pmI bet the modern man never manspreads, nor has he a need to.
Kevin M (25bbee) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:47 pmJust take those shiny, tasseled loafers off before you scratch the wood floors, nk.
You can use my cherry wood and titanium shoehorn to put them back on when I show you the door for requesting a Sprite Zero.
JVW (ba78f9) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:49 pmLike Larry Correia says — they’re not the man’s floors, they’re the Frau’s. Yes, dear.
nk (9faaca) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:49 pm#19, Well, Dana, it’s possible that Brian from DeKalb might be more familiar with his wife’s wardrobe than she is.
ropelight (f0afa2) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:52 pmStephen Miller at NRO had a less-profane (but equally withering) take on the banality of the NYT piece. My favorite:
The whole purpose of the NYT piece, I am guessing, was to put in that pantywaist-urban barb against gun ownership.
JVW (ba78f9) — 10/3/2015 @ 2:55 pmhttp://www.nationalreview.com/article/424941/new-york-times-modern-man-list-rebuttal
JD (fdcb4b) — 10/3/2015 @ 3:00 pmI should do a woman’s rebuttal of the list. Given that my gender specializes in passive-aggressive bitchiness, it could be fun.
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 3:06 pmMen’s Colorful Sock Rules!
When and How to Wear Brightly Colored Socks
happyfeet (831175) — 10/3/2015 @ 3:39 pmHaving a daughter makes the modern man more of a complete person. He learns new stuff every day.
I have daughters as well. I actually agree with this one. (That’s Larry Correia on the second line.)
I agree, too. The daughter and I split a Pad Thai and a Thai Panang curry the night before last. With tofu! I liked the curry (even the tofu). You taste the flavors first and the hot is the aftertaste. That’s a neat trick.
nk (9faaca) — 10/3/2015 @ 3:48 pmThis reads like a list of minor annoyances the author compiled about his boyfriend and published as a passive aggressive response.
egd (1ad898) — 10/3/2015 @ 3:52 pmThis reads like a list of minor annoyances the author compiled about his boyfriend and published as a passive aggressive response.
That might help to explain the bizarre entry pertaining to big spoon/little spoon.
JVW (ba78f9) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:23 pmWho is Kenneth Cole? And what are oxfords?
mg (31009b) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:30 pmAnd what are oxfords? You’re joking – right?
ropelight (f0afa2) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:41 pmUhhh, my darling bride would never ask me to buy shoes for her, because she has to do something really radical like try them on first.
The redneck Dana (1b79fa) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:50 pmThe much better looking Dana wrote:
They stay in her purse when she finds a real man to cuckold him.
The thoroughly country Dana (1b79fa) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:52 pmThe much better-looking Dana wrote:
Oddly enough, none of those children resemble him in the slightest, and one is clearly biracial.
The Dana who can see the obvious (1b79fa) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:57 pmRedneck Dana,
Isn’t Mountain Dew your drink?
Dana (86e864) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:59 pmThe modern man cries. He cries often.
John Boehner (31009b) — 10/3/2015 @ 4:59 pmAnd he is paid by the tax-payer to be a drunk.
yes, ropelight.
mg (31009b) — 10/3/2015 @ 5:10 pmUhhh, my darling bride would never ask me to buy shoes for her, because she has to do something really radical like try them on first.
As a person who sells shoes for a living, I can say she is totally correct, because styles run differently even in the dame brand. Although I would bet you do know her shoe size, even if you never buy them.
Actually, that goes for clothes too.
kishnevi (9cb6b5) — 10/3/2015 @ 6:41 pm“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.”
Robert A. Heinlein
Roy Lofquist (6e7240) — 10/3/2015 @ 6:43 pmBTW
kishnevi (9cb6b5) — 10/3/2015 @ 6:45 pmI denounce the NYT for cisgenderism.
he doesn’t have to ask her sister for the size.
After all, modern man’s spouse may be a transvestite from transexual Transylvania.
That list off metro-hipster douchenozzle crapola is practically insufferable. The author and I may be biologically the same gender, but our similarities end there. That is beyond Beta-male nonsense. Delta maybe male.
JD (fdcb4b) — 10/3/2015 @ 7:59 pmI have said this, in one form or another, in several places where this silly article has been discussed, but it bears repeating;
The Modern Man is a man of intelligence and discernment. Consequently, he knows that the New York Times is a provincial hack-rag, and has been for some time. He seldom reads it, as its opinions and editorial policy have no bearing on anything not directly concerned with the intellectually incestuous lives of a small clique of Manhattanites.
C. S. P. Schofield (ab2cdc) — 10/3/2015 @ 8:55 pmThe much better looking Dana asked:
‘Tis true that Dew is my drink of choice. However, wouldn’t the Modern Man™ — is this the new name for “metrosexual?” — have only diet colas in the fridge?
The Dana who grew up in Kentucky (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 6:25 amMr nevi wrote:
I think she wears a 6½ shoe, but I wouldn’t bet more than a case of the Modern Man™-disapproved Mountain Dew on it. As for her clothes, she has to try those on as well, because she’s
The Dana who admits to nothing (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 6:34 amsuch a munchkinvery short, and has to buy petites.JD erred:
No, the author and you may be biologically the same sex, but you are clearly of different genders:
The grammatically correct Dana (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 6:37 amwhile gender refers to behaviors, roles, expectations, and activities in society.
No. These things are still sex. Gender is strictly grammar for people who are not queers.
The more grammarian than thou nk (dbc370) — 10/4/2015 @ 6:55 amMuch appreciated post.
I may be a Neanderthal but I cry and often.
DNF (51a50d) — 10/4/2015 @ 7:01 amwas the original article serious or humor in the vein of “real men don’t eat quiche”?
seeRpea (ce512c) — 10/4/2015 @ 8:50 amSeeRpea – no. It was dead serious.
JD (fdcb4b) — 10/4/2015 @ 8:57 amIf those “men” – “modern men” as described by the NYT – are the best we’ve got, we deserve to be destroyed.
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 9:30 amWe need to kill the bear, not curl up in a fetal position as we’re eaten.
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 9:32 am“Help thyself” vs “Know thyself.”
Being a Mother or a Father is serious business. Their entire example will inform and influence their young forever. If they don’t do it, someone else will.
Real mean and women will know who they are if their parents knew themselves.
felipe (56556d) — 10/4/2015 @ 9:37 amY’know colonel? A bear breaks upon two men. One curls into a fetal position while the other kills the bear. Both survive and tell how their respective actions saved them. whatareyagonnado?
felipe (56556d) — 10/4/2015 @ 9:42 amModern man is a nancified sissy boy.
Bugg (fa64ec) — 10/4/2015 @ 9:48 amhttp://cobb.typepad.com/cobb/2015/10/27-ways-to-be-a-classic-man.html
Cobb (d6ddbb) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:22 amId rather be Classic than Modern
Felipe… teh man who kills the bear should take teh fetal position meh out shopping and buy “him” a pink dress, with matching shoes and a lovely strand of pearls…
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:23 amHere you go, guys. http://www.artofmanliness.com/ You can find the chapter on whittling with a pocketknife yourselves. Not that real men would need it, or any other part of the site, but maybe you know somebody ….
The more grammarian than thou nk (dbc370) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:30 amI’d rather be man primeval* than either modern or classic.
I read through your list, cobb, and it was only slightly less painful than the NYT’s.
Fortunately I have the alcohol on hand for the ritual purification.
*Happily so since the Nixon administration, when I killed my first duck one fine Thanksgiving morning. It’s been on to bigger and better things ever since, except for that unfortunate hiccup after I signed the contract when the Navy told me, no, I couldn’t shoot down any more Iranian airliners.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:31 amOk, this I did not know how to do. http://www.artofmanliness.com/2014/10/02/how-to-gird-up-your-loins-an-illustrated-guide/
The nk who never wore maxi skirts (dbc370) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:32 amOur Windy City barrister wrote:
Alas! Had you written this in 1963, you’d have been correct, but the usage has changed since then.
Of course, I am the one who insists that the word “gay” means only happy and carefree . . . .
The grammarian Dana who keeps up to date (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:34 amLt Col Haiku wrote (using more than seventeen syllables):
I guess that they’re really far out in the woods in this case. Any port in a storm, wot?
The Dana who never saw Brokeback Mountain (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:38 amDon’t worry about it, Dana. I still insist that the word “decimate” means to reduce by one tenth, and then maybe subsist on barley rations, and be forced to sleep outside the camp’s perimeter defenses.
Everybody else uses the word decimate when they’re talking about annihilating or obliterating.
Weirdo me, you know what words I use when I’m trying to convey the meaning of annihilating or obliterating something.
Annihilate. Obliterate.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:41 amI thought decimatio was a punitive measure, in the legions for mutiny and in subject foes for rebellion, where they’d line up the men of the offending unit or village and stick a spear in every tenth one.
nk (dbc370) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:50 amModern man is a nancified sissy boy.
Who is also a dyed-in-the-wool liberal/Democrat, who dominates the offices of places like the New York Times, who incubates and makes excuses for the anomie and decline of Western society, who ultimately deserves to be forced into large room to face a bunch of gun-toting, bomb-toting Islamofascists.
May the two sides both lose.
Mark (f713e4) — 10/4/2015 @ 10:57 am#ManPrimeval Can start a propane camp stove with the muzzle blast of his .45
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:03 am#ManPrimeval Never says “Hold my beer and watch this.” Holds own f***ing beer while delivering the crazy.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:04 am#ManPrimeval Has left at least one 4wd vehicle in a lake or river.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:06 am#Man Primeval When confronted with a points and condensers doesn’t act retarded. H3ll, let’s just water this down to “Knows what a distributor looks like.”
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:09 am#ManPrimeval Rides a motorcycle.* Or, has a really good, colorful reason why not. Like that run in with the three strand barbed wire fence at the end of the road my uncle’s cabin was on in the Plumas National Forest.
WHO THE H3LL STRINGS A BARBED WIRE FENCE ACROSS A ROAD!?!? COULD YOU AT LEAST TIE A COUPLE OF RAGS ON IT OR SOMETHING!?!?
I’m a big fan of windshields.
*Extra points if you’ve ever ridden a Hodaka Combat Wombat.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:16 am#ManPrimeval Thinks it’s weird that a guy wouldn’t want to play Rugby.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:19 am#ManPrimeval Picks up a sword and kinda sorta knows what to do with it
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:19 amlame-ass “modern man”
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:23 amlightly loafered nancy-boy
all-purpose eunuch
#ManPrimeval Understands that sinking feeling you get in your bowels during your last and final rock climb that, unless you have friends with helicopters, you’re not getting back down.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:25 amteh New York Times meh
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:26 amlow-T pencil-dicked effete
teh Sulzberger gene
#ManPrimeval Always packs extra ammo. Lots of extra ammo. Toiletries you can get anywhere. Even if you don’t use the ammo personally, people in police states like North Korea, New York, and Kali will pay handsome sums in good coin for your extra ammo.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:29 am#ManPrimeval Only uses the word “swirl” when discussing the combustion characteristics of a cylinder head he has personally ported.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:32 am#ManPrimeval Only eats BBQ at shacks whose four walls are, as far as he knows, only still standing through the sheer force of his will.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:34 amThere’s no real symmetry here.
Everyone agrees that the shootings are a bad thing.
But not everybody agrees that the abortions and the selling (allegedly at no profit – charges are just for shipping and handling) of body parts of aborted babies, AND strategizing so as to get more whole body parts are a bad thing.
Sammy Finkelman (2972ba) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:36 am#ManPrimeval Thinks globally but acts locally. As in, only dines at Asian immigrant restaurants who source their meat at local parks.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:38 am#ManPrimeval Understands that every single person on the payroll of the NYT could perform oral sex on me and it still wouldn’t make up for the fact I wasn’t the guy who killed Cecil the lion.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:41 am#ManPrimeval Understands that while al cohol like al gebra has an Arabic name associated, it doesn’t mean the freaking Arabs invented it.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:50 am#ManPrimeval Three words. Beer can chicken.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 11:59 am#ManPrimeval Discovers God in a strip joint.
“Look at this. It can’t be an accident. THERE MUST BE A GOD.”
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 12:09 pm#ManPrimeval Can figure out RADAR but not women.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 12:10 pm#ManPrimeval Works at Walmart, thinks he has a chance with a Kardashian.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 12:12 pmSorry, @87 was aimed at a modern man.
#ManPrimeval doesn’t give a s*** about the Kardashians.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 12:20 pm#ManPrimeval Is intensely curious why a chicken can live so long without a head.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:10 pm#ManPrimeval Wonders where he can get the best price for his coyote pelts
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:11 pm#ManPrimeval contemplates the broad Pacific, wonders which of his companions of the Lewis and Clark expedition should be offered in sacrifice to his primitive gods.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:28 pm#ManPrimeval Names his horse “Sunny” after the eggs.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:30 pmSunny side up.
Duhh!
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:35 pm#81, Sammy, conspiring to peddle human baby organs for a Lamborghini is undeniably a bad thing. You know that, and it’s a bad thing to pretend otherwise. You ain’t perfect, none of us are, but you’re better than that.
ropelight (20f73a) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:40 pmSorry, Sammeh… anyone I know or would care to know knows unequivocally that what PP does vis-a-vis babies and baby body parts is immoral and worthy of condemnation.
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 10/4/2015 @ 1:46 pmre #81 and #96: Hi Sammy! unfortunately, he is correct. Do a search and you will find a ton of comments that the benefits of greater social good of having the stem cells and organs of aborted fetuses override any moral squeamishness about it. I hope these are astroturf campaigns but still, the meme is out there (btw: you will also find those who say executed people’s parts should be fair game as well)
It is not a pleasant country or world we currently live in.
seeRpea (ce512c) — 10/4/2015 @ 2:19 pmre #97: “pleasant” in moral things, not physical things.
seeRpea (ce512c) — 10/4/2015 @ 2:21 pmand there is a reason eBay had to explicitly state that selling body parts was a no-no-no.
Actually, if you meet someone who is military or ex-military, a good way to tell what branch of the service they’re from is what they call a helicopter. Army generally says “Chopper”, Navy says “Helo” (Not sure about Air Force and Marines).
Eric (bfaeb1) — 10/4/2015 @ 2:57 pm#ManPrimeval “Does this look like a race I want to lose?”
Steve57, just steps in front of the mob, trukkin’ back to the ship after the liberty incident.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 3:40 pmThe Marines pretty much conform to Navy slang.
It helps when calling in air strikes or medical.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 3:48 pmIt helps to be singing from the same sheet of music. To illustrate, according to the Navy signal book in use at the time, “roger” could either mean “commence firing” or “confirm my last.”
So, a skipper might send his task force commander, the Officer in Tactical Command (OTC), a two word message, “Interrogative, roger.”
Interrogative meaning of course it’s a question.
So, the OTC thinks the skipper of one of his boats wants to know if he received his last voice transmission. So the OTC responds “Roger.”
But the skipper was asking if he should commence firing.
As an aside, you should always commence firing.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:02 pm#ManPrimeval Never wonders if he should commence firing. Ungawwa!
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:04 pm#ManPrimeval When in doubt destroy the village.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:06 pmot, his second volume is out,
http://www.bookreporter.com/reviews/the-conquering-tide-war-in-the-pacific-islands-1942-1944
the first, December 7, had a lot of background to the conflict,
narciso (ee1f88) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:12 pm#ManPrimeval http://www.snipercountry.com/Articles/GunfightRules.asp
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:28 pmOne of my strongest memories of 20 years of service is of the priest looking out over his flock, first Sunday after a port visit to Thailand. And laughing.
Don’t get me wrong. He loved all of us sinners. And weren’t there lots to love, after Pattaya.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:36 pmMr 57 wrote:
Shouldn’t that be, “27. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun, the caliber of which does not start with a “.4”? 🙂
The nitpicking Dana (1b79fa) — 10/4/2015 @ 4:41 pmif you like 2 fight u a double-drag fool i’m goin 2 another life how bout u
happyfeet (831175) — 10/4/2015 @ 5:06 pmMay the Lord protect you and your family and your magnificent Son.Thank You and him
john morrissey (736d03) — 10/4/2015 @ 5:20 pm#ManPrimevel Already booked the Mariachi band for the funeral. Approved the sheet music for the designated songs from the Stone Temple Pilots, thus ensuring the ceremony will be dignified.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 8:18 pmDana, I think the saying is don’t attend a knife fight with vapor ware.
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 8:21 pmhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYru-wlZ5Fc&list=RDJQA0CJlfN3Y&index=7
Cawabunga!
Steve57 (fe8ad6) — 10/4/2015 @ 8:24 pm“If you ain’t cheating, you ain’t trying” The first rule of air combat.
Eric (bfaeb1) — 10/5/2015 @ 2:47 amI have hardwood floors so can I come to the party if I buy a melon baller today?
mark johnson (a922de) — 10/5/2015 @ 6:39 amThe “Modern Man” would never exist in a country devoted to earning money by manufacturing or doing useful things.
He is a product of deficit financing, which artificially supports hordes of grief counselors, provosts, “diversity” specialists, “educators” instead of teachers, and “journalists” instead of reporters.
A “melon baller/small spoon/cries a lot/ew! a gun” man has no idea how to do useful things, and sees no reason to reward those that do. And sadly, his vote counts as much as yours.
Harcourt Fenton Mudd (5e0a82) — 10/5/2015 @ 10:23 am…Then they cheat on the dickless wonder with a Real Man…
IGotBupkis, "Si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses." (d7ab6c) — 10/5/2015 @ 6:53 pm