Patterico's Pontifications

12/13/2013

I Don’t Know If Santa’s White, But He’s Definitely a Conservative

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 7:20 am



Megyn Kelly recently told viewers that Jesus and Santa Claus are white, and this sparked a great national controversy because something something I don’t even know how to finish this sentence. If you forgot who Megyn Kelly is, here is a reminder:

Screen Shot 2013-12-13 at 6.58.48 AM

Anyway, Allahpundit wrote about this, because hey, blog traffic! and did his usual entertaining job with the topic. However, I must take strong exception to this:

Whatever race you happen to think Santa is, can we all at least agree that he’s a liberal? I take no pleasure in drawing that conclusion but it is what it is. The guy hands out presents that others have paid for and then expects to be celebrated for it. His last name might as well be Kennedy. Get a job, Santa.

Excuse me, Mr. Candy-Ass RINO, but Santa has a job, and he does it in a remarkably efficient manner. He performs a valuable service, delivering presents all across the world in a single night, while facing logistical nightmares that would terrify the average liberal. Here are some other indications that Santa is definitely a conservative.

  • He makes a list and checks it twice. Lefties wouldn’t bother re-checking the list, if they could bother to make it at all. Obama would delegate the list-making to Valerie Jarrett and go play a round of golf.
  • He cares if you’ve been bad or good. If you’ve been good, you get your presents. If you’ve been bad, you get a lump of coal. He believes in personal responsibility and consequences for bad behavior. What part about any of this sounds leftish to you?
  • He has a large workforce, albeit of elves, and knows what it means to make a payroll. You think elves work for free? And I’m told they’re not always that easy to work with. Managing problems like this tends to make one conservative.
  • He has chosen to locate his business in a remote and extremely cold location. I hear he made this decision because the North Pole is one of the few places on Earth not under the jurisdiction of a government, meaning Santa is free from laws, taxation, and regulation. This is an indication of rugged individualism. [UPDATE: A reader informs me that Canada recently laid claim to the North Pole, eh?]

I do have to acknowledge two counterarguments. He does take credit for others’ good deeds, which is kind of lefty behavior. And he seems to be quite a fan of the surveillance state — he sees you when you’re sleeping? He knows if you’re awake? Really? — which is a disturbing characteristic that crosses ideological lines, as Bush and Obama both went overboard in that area.

Listen, I’m not saying the guy’s perfect. But look: Reagan signed an amnesty bill. On balance, Santa is pretty danged conservative.

86 Responses to “I Don’t Know If Santa’s White, But He’s Definitely a Conservative”

  1. Dude. In case you haven’t heard, Canada recently claimed the North Pole as its own.

    DarthChocolate (e63bb7)

  2. Santa also couldn’t be a liberal because he has to be on time in the wee morning hours of December 25th each and every year. In comparison, figureheads of the left, including Bill Clinton and Barack Obama, along with the new ultra-liberal mayor of New York City, were or are notorious for being late. I personally know a person of the left who has an irksome (and, quite honestly, rude) habit of being flaky-late to meetings and appointments.

    Mark (58ea35)

  3. [UPDATE: A reader informs me that Canada recently laid claim to the North Pole, eh?]

    Patterico (9c670f)

  4. And he seems to be quite a fan of the surveillance state ….

    A compassionate conservative, then.

    nk (dbc370)

  5. That’s all we needed — a hegemonistic, expansionistic, hockey super-power, on our northern border.

    nk (dbc370)

  6. Well, Santa and Jesus really are white, or at least Caucasian. Jesus was a Jew, and, given that the Gospels tell us that Judas Iscariot had to physically point him out to the soldiers sent to arrest him, it’s obvious that he looked very much like the other Jews in the area. Those were Caucasian people, even though they were mostly a darker shade of Caucasian than typically comes to mind.

    Saint Nicholas was Greek, born in Asia Minor, so he’s going to be pretty much the same: a Caucasian of a darker complexion.

    The multi-cultural Dana (3e4784)

  7. Why, of course the Canadians want to annex the North Pole; now Mr Claus will be subject to Canadian taxes!

    The Dana who can see the real reason (3e4784)

  8. Santa’s sleigh may be running slow this year.

    cnbc.com, December 13: [T]he [CNBC All-America Economic Survey] of 800 people nationwide (with a margin of error of 3.5 percent) predicts a sharp, 9.4 percent drop in holiday spending this year compared with actual outlays a year ago as measured by the National Retail Federation. Americans plan to spend just $681 this holiday season, about on par with 2009, when the nation was clawing its way out of a deep financial crisis.

    Behind this drop is a sharp falloff in spending by the wealthy. Those with incomes above $100,000 plan to lay out $300 less than they did last year, undoing two years of strong gains. But more broadly, overall sentiment about the economy remains muted and incomes severely challenged. There’s even evidence that the imbroglios in Washington had a depressing effect on holiday spending.

    Just 15 percent of the public rate the economy as excellent or good, a substantial gain from 4 percent during the recession that began in 2008 but still well below the 26 percent who thought the economy was in good shape in 2007.

    Meanwhile, 83 percent rate the economy fair or poor. A quarter of those who will spend less this year say it’s because their income is lower; 22 percent report that it’s because the economy is in bad shape.

    Mark (58ea35)

  9. Well done, Patterico! Your presentation of the two counter arguments is yet more evidence that I am reading in the right(no pun intended) place.

    felipe (70ff7e)

  10. Santa Claus is not St. Nicholas. St. Nicholas comes on December 6 and leaves candy in your shoe. St. Basil of Caesaria is Santa Claus. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basil_of_Caesarea#Caesarea They are both kindly saints, so I can understand the confusion, especially among northern European barbarian latecomers to Christianity who were still painting themselves blue and fighting the Romans when the two saints were alive.

    nk (dbc370)

  11. 6. Comment by The multi-cultural Dana (3e4784) — 12/13/2013 @ 7:49 am

    Those were Caucasian people, even though they were mostly a darker shade of Caucasian than typically comes to mind.

    cf The Mishnah Negaim 2:1

    Sammy Finkelman (ca4c0f)

  12. I too, would not call Jesus “white”. He was born and lived in the middle of the known world, with a skin tone in the middle range of skin tones.
    FWIW

    Though there is a tribe in Africa of dark pigmentation that has genetic markers largely limited to Jewish males, FWIW.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lemba_people

    Consider me old fashioned, but I am suspicious of theology coming from someone dressed like that.

    MD in Philly (f9371b)

  13. Santa Claus was invented in New York, a Yankee adaptation in the first half of the 1800s of something Dutch..

    Several people are responsible (like whoever wrote the poem wronly attribited to Clement Clark Moore) but he was given a big push by Macys.

    Sammy Finkelman (ca4c0f)

  14. Plus, Santa does not take from some to give to others. He creates his presents out of magic, for crying out loud! So he’s not a liberal.

    (Mark, I guess they are all saving up for their free health care next year!)

    Patricia (be0117)

  15. Sammy, since we’re on religious traditions, and you didn’t seem to know what I was talking about when I mentioned it before. I was invited to a Hanukkah dinner and I was seated with a strange lady with our wrists tied together (my left to her right) the entire time at the table. They’re Morrocan Sephardics. Is it a universal Hanukkah tradition or just theirs? (They also had a belly dancer.)

    nk (dbc370)

  16. The original giving and child focused SinterKlaas was from Holland and was White European with a black helper sidekick. He rode a huge horse and wore bishop’s robes. He carried a big bag and delivered gifts to children by knocking on their front door. SinterKlaas was imported to Niew Amsterdam and the Hudson Valley well over 300 years ago with the Dutch settlers. Clement Moore’s jolly plump St. Nick with sleigh and reindeer was described and pictured in modern terms in 1826. White. The history of Santa in America is clear and incontrovertible no matter what the later arriving Greeks say. In the spirit of the season I love seeing Black Santas and Korean Santas and other ethnic Santas running around this time of year to meet the needs of our American melting pot culture.

    elissa (0c4f80)

  17. He cares if you’ve been bad or good. If you’ve been good, you get your presents. If you’ve been bad, you get a lump of coal. He believes in personal responsibility and consequences for bad behavior. What part about any of this sounds leftish to you?

    Excuse Me?
    I’ve seen the commercial.
    If you’re bad, you get a red Mercedes; good, a white one.
    How does that work?

    askeptic (b8ab92)

  18. Classic Patterico. Well done!

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  19. Santa is definately a liberal…because he is a lie.

    DejectedHead (a094a6)

  20. Me, I like teh HAWT female elves in teh short skirts. YMMV.

    daleyrocks (bf33e9)

  21. 15. Comment by nk (dbc370) — 12/13/2013 @ 8:51 am

    Sammy, since we’re on religious traditions, and you didn’t seem to know what I was talking about when I mentioned it before. I was invited to a Hanukkah dinner and I was seated with a strange lady with our wrists tied together (my left to her right) the entire time at the table. They’re Morrocan Sephardics. Is it a universal Hanukkah tradition or just theirs? (They also had a belly dancer.)

    Especially when you add the belly dancer that doesn’t sound like any kind of religious tradition. Maybe it is something Moroccan, and has nothing at all to do with Hanukkah even if there is some kind of significance to it.

    Google found this:

    http://www.jasontopia.com/2011/03/16/thai-wedding-of-our-wedding-world-tour/

    I have no idea where these people got it from – I can make guesses at ideas, that is all.

    Sammy Finkelman (3bb3ae)

  22. 13. By the way, he was still St. Nicholas in the 1823 poem, although the date had been moved to dec. 24. It was first published anonymously, and attributed to Moore in 1837. Moore included it in the 1844 anthology of his works Poems. Wikipedia says he hadn’t wanted to be associated with it because he was a professor. Donald Foster, who has been involved in somne controversies about authroship and claims to be able to detect it by cpontent analysis questioned whether he was really the author. Wikipedia seems to settle on Moore citing

    http://www.sethkaller.com/about/educational/tnbc/

    Sammy Finkelman (3bb3ae)

  23. nk – The string was obviously to keep you from stealing stuff. They knew about greeks.

    daleyrocks (bf33e9)

  24. Denounced. Denounced and condemned. Racists.

    JD (a8d68a)

  25. santa is a strong black woman

    strong and proud

    like oprah but less whiny

    happyfeet (c60db2)

  26. I wish to clarify that as a non-state actor Santa Surveillance (pty ltd) is not part of any surveillance state. Despite repeated threats by many governments aimed at forcing Santa Surveillance to turn over information, we have an unbroken record spanning centuries of independence from government. While certain Santa affiliated corporations have found it useful to enter into relationships with government groups (see Toys For Tots for instance) Santa Surveillance is dedicated to maintaining the integrity of Naughty/Nice data. Santa Surveillance takes this obligation so seriously that all employees are required annually to sign an oath to destroy the data before allowing it to fall into non-elf hands.

    J. Pintersen
    Chief Elf Officer
    Santa Surveillance, a subsidiary of Santa Enterprises

    jaypintersen (131bc0)

  27. Oh, come now, Santa is the king of delegation. Maybe long ago he used to go about on a sleigh doing his own deliveries, back when his territory only covered a few villages. But demand for his services spread quickly, so he developed a network of volunteers to do his deliveries. Nowadays this network spreads all over the globe, and he has so many volunteers that none of them have to do much work; indeed most of them are only assigned a single household to deliver to! That, of course, makes volunteering attractive enough to prevent burnout, and allows the system to keep working from year to year.

    Once he licked the distribution problem, it naturally occurred to him that the list-making could be delegated too, to the same agents. Unfortunately the work involved proved to be a bit more than some of the volunteers bargained for, and I’m sad to say that many of them — in typical liberal fashion — fake their reports. Like those census workers in Philadelphia who faked their employment numbers last year in time for the election, too many of Santa’s volunteers just put down “nice” for all the kids in their assigned household, and recommend them for presents, regardless of merit.

    Which I suppose is just as well, since where are you going to get coal nowadays? You’d have to shop high and low for a lump of coal, whereas toys are cheap and abundant, and you can get all the naughty kids toys at the 99 cent store for a fraction of what you’d spend in time and gas to get them coal. Beside which, have you ever thought what a naughty kid could do with coal, in a nice clean house? Most parents of naughty kids would be not be happy about someone giving their kids coal! What are you going to give them next, matches and kerosene?!

    Your complaint about how he takes credit for other people’s work, though, is misplaced. Unlike socialists, he doesn’t tax anybody, nor does he force anybody to work or donate to his project. Anyone who buys toys for Santa’s network is free to put their own name on them, and let the recipients know who really paid for them. Santa has no objection to this. If most of his presents seem to come directly from him, it’s because the donors chose to be anonymous. In this he’s no different from any charity that distributes its donors’ money, which the recipients think it comes from the charity itself. “How wonderful our pastor is, giving us all this stuff”, they think, when actually it came from kind Mrs Smith and Mr Jones and old Mrs Papadopolous down the block, who gave it anonymously and specifically asked that they not be named. Santa’s donors, too, often ask specifically that they not be named, and that the recipient be allowed to think Santa bought the gifts himself. That’s not socialism, it’s respecting the wishes of property-owners.

    As for the surveillance, he’s not a state actor, so it doesn’t worry me. The Fourth Amendment only applies to governments, for the very good reason that only governments have the coercive powers that make a right to privacy necessary.

    Milhouse (b95258)

  28. Oh, and he has no payroll, since all his workers are volunteers.

    And if Canada thinks they can tax him, they’ll have a rude shock coming, since he has no income.

    Milhouse (b95258)

  29. I don’t want to argue whether Santa is/was real. But are Megyn’s boobs? I’m inclined to doubt it. (From my art classes in college!) They can’t be that big and that perky and natural. Gravity. What do the rest of you think?

    nk (dbc370)

  30. that’s just good journalism Mr. Milhouse

    thank you for your thorough report

    happyfeet (c60db2)

  31. Please, think of all of the good Canadian citizens who can be helped by Santa Claus, not just on Christmas morning, but on every day of the year, if his enormous industrial empire is brought under our sovereignty and fairly taxed. If we assume that St Nicholas distributes an average of $10 per person, worldwide, or roughly $70 billion, a simple 10% rate of taxation would produce $7 billion, a substantial amount given our small population.

    The Dana in Ottawa (3e4784)

  32. 29- nk, kids help, and I believe that pix was taken just after her first child!

    askeptic (b8ab92)

  33. Dana, he has no income. Nor any assets to speak of. He’s the ultimate non-profit. So what are you going to tax?

    Milhouse (b95258)

  34. Beside which, it’s not as if he has to be located at the North Pole. There aren’t any resources he needs there, it isn’t particularly close to his suppliers, so if Canada manages to make a tax stick he’ll just move his operation to the Caymans.

    Milhouse (b95258)

  35. Milhouse wrote:

    Oh, and he has no payroll, since all his workers are volunteers.

    Not volunteers, Mr Milhouse, but slaves, slaves! The British Parliament’s Slavery Abolition Act of 1833 abolished slavery in our great Northern nation, and we should expand to include Mr Claus’ illegal industrial works in the Arctic, which would free these poor elves from oppression.

    Just think what good could be accomplished! S Claus Enterprises would have to pay his workers a fair and living wage, with holidays off, guaranteed health care — including abortion; the forced breeding of elvettes has been a consistent problem — and the full range of worker protection and safety programs.

    And, as long as we are on that subject, I believe that there are some real concerns with using reindeer as beasts of burden . . . .

    The indignant Dana (3e4784)

  36. Not slaves, Dana, volunteers. Much like the workers who joyfully give up their weekend to put in extra shifts at the factory for the good of the Workers’ Paradise… Actually not like that at all. Nobody makes them do anything; they work as much or as little as they feel like doing. If they decide to take a Christmas off, no biggie, the kids on their route (which, as I said, generally consists of only one household, very close to their own residence) will just have to do without presents that year; Santa won’t give them any grief about it, though the kids might. They will be welcomed back next year with no hard feelings (again, on Santa’s part, not the kids’).

    Milhouse (b95258)

  37. The same applies to the elves, they work only as and when the fancy takes them, but they take such joy in their work that although Santa tries to tell them to take it easy they overproduce by a ridiculous amount, leaving Santa with a huge toy surplus every year. Hence the supply of toys in the 99 cent stores that I alluded to earlier; where did you think that came from?

    Milhouse (b95258)

  38. Plus, the elf refectory and recreation facility has to be seen to be believed. Google has nothing on Santa.

    Milhouse (b95258)

  39. Actually Google has quite a lot on Santa, but you know what I meant. (Just thought I’d get that out there before someone else did.)

    Milhouse (b95258)

  40. “I don’t want to argue whether Santa is/was real. But are Megyn’s boobs?”

    I don’t want to argue either, so I will paraphrase a stupid mendacious person:

    What difference, at this point, does it make if those bewbs are real?

    daleyrocks (bf33e9)

  41. How much does Santa pay his elves an hour?

    ratbeach (477e41)

  42. How much does Santa pay his elves an hour?

    Dude, what part of “volunteer” didn’t you understand? They would pay Santa for the privilege of working there, if he felt like charging them. Not only do they get to work in Santa’s Workshop! but the amenities put Google to shame. Why would they want money on top of that?

    Milhouse (b95258)

  43. Not only are the elves enslaved by S Claus Enterprises LLC, but they are piece-worked out to Keebler; surely you have seen the commercials in which Keebler proudly proclaims that their cookies are baked by elves.

    The righteously indignant Dana (3e4784)

  44. Whoa, there! What have the elves who work in the cookie factory got to do with the ones at the toy factory? The baker elves are the ones whose right to work as long as they pleased was upheld by Lochner (and then sadly violated by subsequent courts). They get paid peanuts. And tree nuts, chocolate, etc. The toymaker elves are a completely different lot. Next you’ll be dragging in elvers as a well!

    Milhouse (b95258)

  45. Hmmm, coal is hard to come by, eh?
    Somebody once made a fortune on “Pet Rocks”.
    I bet someone could make a fortune, at least one year, on lumps of coal in little wood gift boxes for all of the children , and grownups, who have been naughty that year.
    Please consider giving me at least 1% of profits for the idea.

    MD in Philly (f9371b)

  46. After you reminded me who Megyn Kelly is, I forgot the topic of this thread.

    Something about Santa delivering pajama-grams or something . . .

    Icy (2cc9fb)

  47. What do the rest of you think?

    Comment by nk (dbc370) — 12/13/2013 @ 10:46 am

    Think? ThinK? That photo does not help me think!

    felipe (70ff7e)

  48. Naughty boys get coal. Naughty girls get diamonds.

    nk (dbc370)

  49. Why is Santa so jolly? He knows which are the naughty girls.

    nk (dbc370)

  50. Well nk, first St. Nicholas, was one of your kinsman, born in Cappadocia, which doesn’t make him a Turk

    narciso (3fec35)

  51. If you like the tradition of your Santa Claus, you can keep it.

    Elephant Stone (6a6f37)

  52. One of my early memories etched in my mind forever: I was doubting the whole Santa thing as a young boy while visiting Patterico over Christmas. My brother and Patterico argued and argued that he was real and that all these news people wouldn’t waste so much time and money on someone who wasn’t real. His political affiliation never came up somehow. I still remember this debate 30 something years later.

    Jim C (35d712)

  53. I have only one firm belief about the American political system, and that is this: God is a Republican and Santa Claus is a Democrat.

    God is an elderly or, at any rate, middle aged male, a stern fellow, patriarchal rather than paternal and a great believer in rules and regulations. He holds men accountable for their actions. He has little apparent concern for the material well being of the disadvantaged. He is politically connected, socially powerful and holds the mortgage on literally everything in the world. God is difficult. God is unsentimental. It is very hard to get into God’s heavenly country club.

    Santa Claus is another matter. He’s cute. He’s nonthreatening. He’s always cheerful. And he loves animals. He may know who’s been naughty and who’s been nice, but he never does anything about it. He gives everyone everything they want without the thought of quid pro quo. He works hard for charities, and he’s famously generous to the poor. Santa Claus is preferable to God in every way but one: There is no such thing as Santa Claus.

    Parliament of Whores

    Scrutineer (08b0be)

  54. Is she the spokes-model for the Bad Elves?

    Of course Santa is real. Suffering from overwhelm, which is why I’m helping him again.

    htom (412a17)

  55. (nk — not real. Well, real with stuffing. Calves, thighs, a–, waist, arms, neck, all say B or C, which is probably what she’d have (and look better, imao) without the DD stiff stuffing.) People do strange things.

    Don’t get me started about husbands telling their wives to get implants. That ought to be considered domestic abuse.

    htom (412a17)

  56. You know Santa doesn’t exist, right? I mean THE Santa Claus. Sorry to ruin it for you kids.

    The Emperor AKA the ReAlist (fc6588)

  57. Comment by nk (dbc370) — 12/13/2013 @ 10:46 am

    Of course those are hers, I bet she’s even got the receipt.

    SPQR (768505)

  58. And he seems to be quite a fan of the surveillance state — he sees you when you’re sleeping? He knows if you’re awake? Really? — which is a disturbing characteristic that crosses ideological lines, as Bush and Obama both went overboard in that area.

    I wish to register a protest, in that there’s no question that the most recent, most clear example of surveillance state BS started with not Bush, but Clinton. Do a search on Project Echelon.

    The surveillance (hey, whooodathunkit!?!?) did not MATTER until GWB was in charge.

    THEN, suddenly, it, like “Extraordinary Rendition” as well as the notion of just killing enemies of the state by what nominally would be called “assassination” methods, mattered, since a Republican was (“Oh Noeeeees!!!“) In Charge.

    Smock Puppet, Gadfy, Racist-Sexist Thug, and Bon Vivant All In One Package (225d0d)

  59. Well there was ‘Enemy of the State’ that Hayden overreacted to, it’s ironic how they gave Jon Voight’s the better lines, since Will Smith was the putative hero,

    narciso (3fec35)

  60. I’d sure like Santa to leave Megyn under my tree.

    Dirty Old Man (5b158d)

  61. if you love your Megyn set her free if she comes back it’s probably cause she forgot her cell phone

    happyfeet (8ce051)

  62. If you don’t like Megyn Kelly, you probably live in the wrong country.

    Or you pay for HBO instead of volunteering at a food bank or giving a quarter to the Salvation Army.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  63. Why is Santa so jolly? He knows which are the naughty girls.

    Comment by nk (dbc370) — 12/13/2013 @ 1:10 pm

    And I always thought he was just being jolly when he says “Ho,Ho, Ho!”, now you tell me that he’s just naming names!

    peedoffamerican (c1890a)

  64. That’s good, POA. How are you?

    I’m doing two threads with one post here, hope you like it. http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-uzkis88nfLg/Uqvxw-RiBuI/AAAAAAAAAgw/5866EvA_QOE/s1600/obamadud.png

    nk (dbc370)

  65. Curves from the waist down do it for me.

    mg (31009b)

  66. That chick Kelly is hot. What does she do for a living?

    AZ Bob (ade845)

  67. Attracts middle-aged white men to watch her on Fox News.

    nk (dbc370)

  68. All yall’l like this. http://imgur.com/gallery/jMGx7SV

    nk (dbc370)

  69. Surgically enhanced is real. Enhanced by photoshop is not real.
    That’s the distinction that matters.

    NickM (f8e14b)

  70. 25. santa is a strong black woman

    strong and proud

    like oprah but less whiny

    Comment by happyfeet (c60db2) — 12/13/2013 @ 10:15 am

    So Santa is about how I like my coffee. Good Navy coffee. Black and proud. If you stick a spoon in it you don’t need to wonder if it’ll stand upright without hitting one of the sides. If you make it right it won’t even hit the bottom.

    I’ll have to ask for it, the next time.

    Steve57 (137dd8)

  71. Speaking of black, doesn’t it take a woman with a little seasoning to really make it work? A twenty something couldn’t turn that dress into the smoking hotness Megyn Kelly can. That takes practice.

    Steve57 (137dd8)

  72. As an aside, I rehooked up with my lesbian cousin at the funeral. Haven’t seen her for years. I’m looking forward to it.

    What do I talk about with her gay male friends? The weather? Real estate? Stocks? How hot Megyn Kelly happens to be is out, I’m figuring.

    Steve57 (137dd8)

  73. I’m looking forward to seeing her at Christmas.

    Steve57 (137dd8)

  74. Sometimes, Steve, I don’t believe you really were in the Navy. Because if you really were, you’re putting us on by pretending that you don’t know how to talk to gays.

    nk (dbc370)

  75. The legend is based on the life of the historical Saint Wenceslaus I, Duke of Bohemia or Svatý Václav in Czech (907–935).

    Svatý Václav or Santa Claus.

    I don’t care what the black man say,
    Santa Claus was a white man…

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  76. Yeah, I expected that. And I don’t know what it’s like down in enlisted berthing. Mebbe it’s gayer.

    Still, I’ve showered with what? Ten thousand guys in 20 years? And I’m like, “meh.” Seen 2000 swinging d**** you’ve seen them all. And then Megyn Kelly puts on a black dress. And I’m like, “Whoa Nellie! Check that out.”

    I plan on continuing to disappoint you as I continue coming to grips with my heterosexuality, despite my naval past. So sorry.

    It is a real problem, not being able to relate to my cousin’s gay friends.

    Steve57 (137dd8)

  77. I think you need to get some of those words back.

    Narciso, if you paid a thousand. You got jipped.

    Maybe you can make up the difference with an anchorbabe from CNN.

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  78. Like the black Santa would say,”hoe hoe hoe!”

    The Emperor AKA the ReAlist (5647ed)

  79. Racist.

    I thought it was cute how MPH over at MSLSD tried to blame this whole discussion on the existence of racial animosity and Megyn Kelly, instead of noting that this nonsense resulted from that slate writers advocating for the Penguin Santa because of racisms and non-inclusiveness.

    JD (5c1832)

  80. 84. …I thought it was cute how MPH over at MSLSD tried to blame this whole discussion on the existence of racial animosity and Megyn Kelly, instead of noting that this nonsense resulted from that slate writers advocating for the Penguin Santa because of racisms and non-inclusiveness.

    Comment by JD (5c1832) — 12/15/2013 @ 11:11 am

    I love how liberals define “inclusive” to mean more minorities and women.

    Spike Lee got upset with Clint Eastwood for only casting Whites and Asians in Flags of our Fathers and Letters from Iwo Jima.

    Spike Lee would cry bloody murder if you tried to cast a white man to play a historically black figure. But he’ll be the first to demand to know why Clint Eastwood isn’t airbrushing black characters into history (there was a black army logistics unit at Iwo Jima that played no role in combat).

    It’s actually kind of schizo when you think about it. Movie makers that want America to constantly get its face rubbed into a racist past that exists primarily in their imaginations also demand to know why Clint Eastwood isn’t integrating the WWII military.

    It’s now possible to visit the USS Constitution and learn about the men and women who fought that ship. I’m pretty sure women were pretty scarce in that crew when they were fighting the Barbary pirates or during the War of 1812. But I guess in the name of “inclusion” we’ve got to rewrite history to erase our sexist past as well. While simultaneously not letting people forget the evils teh patriarchy continues to inflict during its never ending “war on women.”

    And now Santa Claus can’t be a white man.

    It’s getting so as it’s racist and sexist to even have a history.

    Steve57 (96df60)

  81. In the spirit of the season I love seeing Black Santas and Korean Santas and other ethnic Santas running around this time of year to meet the needs of our American melting pot culture.

    And you thereby fail to see that this has, at its heart, a message to kids that “skin color matters“.

    You can’t expect a child to truly discount race when they are NOT taught from early on that racial appearance does not matter, what the person is and does matters.

    Smock Puppet, Gadfy, Racist-Sexist Thug, and Bon Vivant All In One Package (225d0d)


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