Sockpuppet Friday: The Praise Me More Edition!
[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.]
As usual, you are positively encouraged to engage in sock puppetry in this thread. The usual rules apply.
Please, be sure to switch back to your regular handle when commenting on other threads. I have made that mistake myself, a lot.
And remember: the worst sin you can commit on this thread is not being funny.
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And for a little Friday frivolity, I meant to post on this a few days ago, but it got pushed aside. If one wanted a window into the galling egotism of Nancy Pelosi, there are few better examples than this. The DNC was proposing a resolution honoring Pelosi’s years of service as Speaker of the House, but apparently Nancy felt there was insufficient praise in the draft:
The Democratic National Committee wanted to honor Nancy Pelosi Thursday — but its praise wasn’t good enough for the House minority leader. When the DNC’s Resolutions Committee brought up a resolution commemorating Pelosi’s years as speaker of the House, Pelosi’s daughter sought to alter the proposal at her mother’s behest, adding some of the accomplishments that the elder Pelosi felt the committee had overlooked.
“I have some friendly amendments,” said Christine Pelosi, a political strategist, at the committee’s session during the DNC Winter Meeting at the Marriott Wardman Park hotel Thursday afternoon. She is a member of the committee.
“You think I’m kidding,” Christine Pelosi added, to surprised laughter from the room. The proposed changes, she indicated, came out of a discussion with her mother.
[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]
Yep. It’s all about MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
And my service to the people, of course. I’ve been so good to them. Praise be to MEEEEEE!!
BotoxBitchByTheBay (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:00 am……Aaron…………..Aaron………………Aaron……………Aaron……..19,324 Aaron…………………………
Kaymawwwwn (967261) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:00 amI do NOT have an internet surfing problem – it was a popup, really
Elisssssssssa (967261) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:02 amSo a chick takes off all her clothes and pleasures herself in front of a class of college students. What’s the big deal? It’s not like any of the students were underage or anything.
[Puppeted by someone that attended a university at age 17.]
Kman (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:04 amI love all of my people. That’s why I’m prepared to kill every last one of them that dares to defy me.
GoDaffy.com (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:07 amIt’s time for Cute Taffy to go.
Unfortunately, I cannot envision my own departure.
Teh One (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:13 amI’m the most pro-gun candidate . . .
. . . nobody but NOBODY shoots himself in the foot the way I do!
Huckleberry (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:15 amMichelle Bachmann provides me with a wealth of material . . .
. . . and I deposit a wealth of ‘material’ on her photo everyday.
Chrissie Leg-Tingle (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:18 amTrust me, you do NOT want to know what me and Sullivan and Frank Rich are ‘up’ to.
Olbermonkey (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:20 amPlease let him be the nominee.
PLEEEAAASSEEE let him be the nominee!
Lawrence "I believe in toning down the rhetoric, EXCEPT when speaking of the Mormon devil, Romney" O'Donnell (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:26 amThe Wisconsin 14 should be given medals!*
They can make them from the plate in my head.
[*Ed. note: He really said this last night]
Ed Schultz (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:29 amThuffering thuccotath!
Gadhaffi Duck (882387) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:31 amhere for you from everybody’s favoritest or maybe second- or third-favoritest housemartin
happyfeet (a55ba0) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:43 amhello it is Friday I can tell cause there’s cookies
happyfeet (a55ba0) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:47 amlink
happyfeet (a55ba0) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:47 amWhat, no praise for the Empress for her pioneering work in botox?
notrbj (9f3937) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:09 amGOD HATES US!
Westboro Truth Squad (a2a019) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:11 amOUR CHURCH IS DOOMED!
WE ARE THE ANTICHRIST!
GOD IS OUR ENEMY!
GOD LAUGHS AT OUR MISFORTUNE!
WE ARE GOING TO HELL!
GOD HATES OUR HATE!
WE WILL BURN IN HELL!
GOD CURSES US BECAUSE OF OUR HATE!
GOD HATES OUR SIGNS!
When she gets up to Saddam-like election percentages, 90-100 pct, I may care. But probably not.
Bigfoot (8096f2) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:20 amHeh heh. I’d like to munch on Sarah’s ‘cookies’.
happy lecher (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:21 amLook! There he is! Right there at the top of the thread.
STOP FOLLOWING ME!!!
Grace Park (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:23 amAm SO a word! Just ask your average liberal arts major.
alot (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:25 amWhat are federal quorum requirements? Do extradition treaties cover federal legislators on the run from job responsibilities?
Badger 14 Fan Club (3d3f72) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:36 amThey crossed state lines. Call the FBI!
It’s a missing persons case. We just want to reunite them with their loved ones.
A-HA! (4f6850) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:38 amWould someone puleezz tell the clueless morons that it’s supposed to be Lady Justice who’s blind, not me.
The Statue of Liberty, feeling claustrophobic and itchy (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:48 amI’m pretty sure you’re just trying to flout my ruling, but I’ll be nice and assume you Obama admin lawyers are merely weapons-grade stupid. So you have seven days, that’s S-E-V-E-N, as in 7, not seventeen like Al Gore’s election count lawyers tried to get away with.
Do I need to remind you what happened with that case? DO I????!!!?
U.S. District Judge Roger Vinson (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 11:58 amMillionaires are so selfish. They think their money belongs to them. It’s a national resource and everyone is entitled to their money!!
Michael "I already made my millions so new taxes don't apply to me" Moore (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:02 pmFeeling down? Depressed?
Your president takes too many vacation days?
Thinks partying is more important than doing his job?
Doesn’t pay attention the way you want him to?
We have just the fix for you! It’s the new “Embarrass Him On National Television”(tm) Press Conference!
Guaranteed to work FAST! Just look at this demonstration!
John Boehner, Speaker of the House (new and improved!) (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:14 pmRep. Michelle Litjens is being such a baby. Doesn’t she know that yelling “you are f*****g DEAD” on the State House floor is part of my average day?
Don’t take it personally, dollface. At least I don’t talk to you like I talk to my hos.
Rep. Rep. Gordon Hintz (D-Mobster) (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:22 pmRep. Michelle Litjens is being such a baby. Doesn’t she know that yelling “you are f*****g DEAD” on the State House floor is part of my average day?
Don’t take it personally, dollface. At least I don’t talk to you like I talk to my hos.
Rep. Rep. Gordon Hintz (D-Mobster) (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:23 pmWell speaking of strong f******g language (see what I did there, tee hee!) I did manage to scrounge a little extra attention for ME ME ME at the Oscars, didn’t I?
And that’s all that counts! Right?
Melissa Leo (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:26 pmSo I fly my personal trainer in from Chicago a few times every week to help Michelle and myself stay fit. What’s wrong with that?
Because I’m worth every penny. Wouldn’t you agree? Well?
President Barack H. Obama, Healer of Planets even if my carbon footprint exceeds that of the state of New Hampshire (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 12:29 pmYou’re all so jealous because you won’t get to taste our White House Honey Ale, made just for our family and friends and Richard Trumka. I really don’t like big Dick, but he is going to get BuhRock elected again.
First Lady Michelle Obama (6b2e01) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:44 pmIf this standoff lasts much longer, I’m going to have this baby at the Motel 6 in Rockport. That is where we are, isn’t it?
State Senator Julie Lassa (D, Fleebagger) (6b2e01) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:48 pm“These goggles they do nothin,”
rainier wolfcastle (bcb6cc) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:49 pmYou teabaggerz are racists.
Barack Obama (d4bbf1) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:49 pmYou do see how much more muscle tone I have, right?
President Barack H. Obama (6b2e01) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:50 pmYou do see how much more muscle tone I have, right?
Comment by President Barack H. Obama — 3/4/2011 @ 1:50 pm
Sure we do.
Mad dictators and plotting terrorists worldwide (325a59) — 3/4/2011 @ 1:53 pmWow… that Nancy Pelosi sure is full of herself, isn’t she?
Must have been some Tiger DNA mixed in with all that botox, or something.
Charlie Sheen (1db6c5) — 3/4/2011 @ 2:01 pmSheila Jackson Lee will have ample “friendly” amendments too when the democrats inevitably honor her as an exemplum of their character and values.
Serious head cases.
Federal Dog (8dc08a) — 3/4/2011 @ 2:53 pmGloria in excelsis Nancy!
Democrats We Have Heard On High (890cbf) — 3/4/2011 @ 3:18 pmWell you’re the real tough fetish with a long history
Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me
That’s okay let’s see how you do it
Put up your sawzall, let’s get down to it
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Why don’t you hit me with your f*cksaw?
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Fire away
You come on with a come on, you don’t fight fair
But that’s okay, see if I care
Knock me down, it’s all in vain
I’ll get right back up on my feet again
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Why don’t you hit me with your f*cksaw?
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Fire away
Well you’re a real tough fetish with a long history
Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me
Before I put another notch in my lipstick case
You better make sure you put me in my place
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Come on, hit me with your f*cksaw
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Fire away
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Pat Benatar (ae76ce) — 3/4/2011 @ 3:54 pmWhy don’t you hit me with your f*cksaw?
Hit me with your f*cksaw
Fire away
Walker is such a bad man, I am shutting down any music education. Just go to my website and blog to see how the gov is abusing us. I am exercising my 1st amendment rights..
Jack Senzig Wisc. teacher (0cd6a2) — 3/4/2011 @ 5:11 pmWait a minute, the union boss is on the line..
“What do yo mean, I’m making everyone look bad. OK I’ll shut down the link to keep children out.”
Am I in charge yet? When do the bucks start rolling in?
Rahm Emanuel (6b2e01) — 3/4/2011 @ 5:11 pmMy department sees nothing wrong with threats and publci displays to lynch a black supremem court justice. That’s what he gets for leaving the liberal plantation.
Eric slick Holder (0cd6a2) — 3/4/2011 @ 5:13 pmAnd the administration doesn’t care about Planned Parenthood partnering with pimps and illegal immigrant underaged hoes…
Eric slick Holder (0cd6a2) — 3/4/2011 @ 5:16 pmHey, I just want to show my democratic bonifides since I will run in 2016….
Marty O'Malley (0cd6a2) — 3/4/2011 @ 5:25 pmFirst, I am a member of an old political MD family, just like my wife, who got a plum appointmetn as a judge because her daddy was the Md attorney general, Pelosi whose dad was the Mayor of Baltimore.
Next, I support the green movement like Al Gore. My idea is to build wind mills off the MD coast. Of course they are not efficient so I will force the utilities to buy power at an inflated price. Thus raising consumer bills. Sine that is not enough to make it work, the state will put up $50 million AND I’ll make consumers pay a $7 or so a month surchare to help them build the windmills.
And no, I really don’t know what the turbines will cost.
So I’m a good democrat to run, eh?
Overheard Coversation:
Fly on Wall (3d3f72) — 3/4/2011 @ 8:17 pmJane: I can’t believe the way things are getting out of hand in Madison!?
Joe: What is it now??
Jane: Well, everybody was behaving themselves, showing their signs, chanting, “This is what Democracy looks like”, and some guy has the nerve to come into the rotunda and actually tries to talk to people about why he thinks Walker is right!! [ http://althouse.blogspot.com/2011/03/free-speech-countervoice-takes-center.html ]
Joe: You’ve got to be kidding!! Right there in the middle so people can see him and talk with him if they want???
Jane: That’s exactly what I mean. He just stood there in the middle of it all and wanted to talk to people “one-on-one”.
Joe: They didn’t let him get away with it, did they?
Jane: Well, they tried to chant loud enough so people couldn’t hear to talk to him, and a couple of brave people asked if he could move out of the center and go somwhere so he wouldn’t be in anyone’s way, but he just wouldn’t budge.
Joe: I wonder how much the Koch brothers paid him.
Jane: A few people said he must have been a Walker plant to disrupt things and stir up trouble, and a few folk seemed ready to oblige, but they were too intimidated. If he was paid to stir things up he didn’t do a very good job of it.
Joe: Well, there can’t be many more where he came from, I bet things will get back to order tomorrow.
Sure, I make more than $400,000 a year. But I do a lot for little, brown people. Plus, I distract the guilty rich from actually having to deal with real problems and they get to feel good by donating to our relentless pledge drives.
It’s a win-win. Especially for parents sending their kids to private schools – like the President.
Vivian Schiller (efea1d) — 3/4/2011 @ 8:19 pmYo gringos, we got trucks AND guns coming to your town soon…..now give us more money gabachos locos. Hey, and like Sr. Baracho sez…always be kindly and generous to los illegos and do what they want….or else! Viva la reconquita, ducha detráses!
F. Calerone, Prez of Aztlan and Mexico (e51d21) — 3/4/2011 @ 9:11 pmSeriously, we really don’t need stinking badges.
Juan (efea1d) — 3/4/2011 @ 9:31 pmLooks like a little paranoia.
What’s wrong with this map?
Can’t they read the title?
Goy Boy (6e2abb) — 3/4/2011 @ 9:52 pmI would say that Donald Douglas gets me hot, but teh gay is disturbing.
SEK (ac48cc) — 3/4/2011 @ 10:55 pmNot that I’m still up at this hour marking student drafts on a Friday night/Saturday morning, but that previous comment — as I’m 100 percent certain someone who can see the IP address will confirm — wasn’t written by me. I am, however, flattered by the fact that someone would take the time and initiative to sockpuppet me, as I am that awesome.
SEK (1d9681) — 3/5/2011 @ 2:27 amTo follow up, while contemplating my awesomeness, I was forced to reflect on how not awesome the rest of you inbred hick troglodyte mouth-breathing racists are.
SEK (d4bbf1) — 3/5/2011 @ 6:44 amIf you like your patterico you can keep ypur patterico.
Obama (984d23) — 3/5/2011 @ 7:26 amYour*
I’am such an commie.
Obama (984d23) — 3/5/2011 @ 7:26 am(And it seems I’m a humorless idiot in the wee hours and should be ignored, so, as to the previous comment, etc. etc.)
SEK (1d9681) — 3/5/2011 @ 9:04 amOkay, I’m going to commit the cardinal sin here and not be funny, but I’m not sure where to post this.
Sarah Palin was on O’Reilly last night, and told everyone that what Chris Christie is doing in NJ isn’t as courageous as what she did in AK. She claimed that it doesn’t take real courage to cut spending when running a deficit, because she cut spending while running a surplus.
I think this is a huge tactical error on her part. She’s going to piss off a large portion of the Republican base by criticizing Christie, and this comparison opens her up to the rebuttal that at least Christie hasn’t resigned his job. Maybe that’s not fair, but then, it certainly wasn’t fair of her to disabuse Christie’s performance.
Some chump (e84e27) — 3/5/2011 @ 9:40 amI’m sure she’ll be heartbroken over it, if not for
narciso (bcb6cc) — 3/5/2011 @ 10:35 amthe garbage spewed by pikachu, the man from Dubai,
and other assorted characters, who are a proxy for
her opponents elsewhere.
And I’m sure her supporters will rationalize her comments, because in their eyes she can do no wrong.
Some chump (e84e27) — 3/5/2011 @ 11:36 amThe only time I’m funny — unintentional as it might be — is in my regular posts.
SEK (f55fa1) — 3/5/2011 @ 9:33 pmI love the idea of Chris Christie
Christine O'Donnell (352bcf) — 3/6/2011 @ 9:09 amTrust me, you don’t.
meg whitman (bcb6cc) — 3/6/2011 @ 9:20 am
Fatboy Slim (aacc3d) — 3/6/2011 @ 4:03 pmI wrote you a song in lieu of a longer comment.