Patterico's Pontifications


The Winners of the Big, Important Movie Awards Are In!

Filed under: General — Aaron Worthing @ 11:49 am

[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.]

No, not the Oscars, which I haven’t cared about for years.  The Razzies!

Not quite sweeping the ceremony, but still handily leading the pack among this year’s RAZZIE choices is RAZZIE Repeat Offender M. Night Shyamalan’s “re-imagining” of the faux-anime’ TV series THE LAST AIRBENDER into a jumbled, jump-cut mess of a movie that fans of the TV show hated even more than critics did (if that’s even possible!). In addition to Worst Director and Worst Picture, AIRBENDER also “won” Worst Screenplay, a brand-new RAZZIE category for 2010, Worst Eye-Gouging Mis-Use of 3-D, and Worst Supporting Actor Jackson Rathbone (who had the misfortune to appear in both AIRBENDER and 2010’s other most-RAZZIE-nominated title, TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE).

Actually, my wife dragged me to that one.  It wasn’t great but it wasn’t nearly as horrible as they said.  It was just “meh.”

On the other hand, I literally couldn’t finish the Russell Crowe version of Robin Hood when I got that recently on Netflix.  Ugh, that couldn’t have been more utterly ill-conceived.  For starters, Crowe was a terrible choice for the character.  Crowe just doesn’t have the grace, charm or agility of a proper Robin Hood.  He is a good actor, but he was all wrong for this role.  And there is a coincidence in the story that made me unable to take it anymore.

So do you think the Razzies got it right?  Well, check out their press release and site and then sound off on the comments.  The person who does the best job insulting a bad movie will get a very special prize…  respect.

H/t: Ign.

[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]

16 Responses to “The Winners of the Big, Important Movie Awards Are In!”

  1. that stupid CW vampire show got shut out? Dear diary today I’m an insipid vapid vampire plus also I have angst again and I’m thinking I need to get my highlights retouched. You know what look tasty? Animal crackers plus they have lots of calcium but I can’t eat them really cause of I’m a vampire. That effing sucks.

    happyfeet (ab5779)

  2. I’m glad at least one blog on the internets is aware there’s more to life than all the civil disobedience crap from Madison to Tripoli, and is covering it.

    elissa (320342)

  3. If they make a “Sex and the City 3” sequel, will it be eligible for a Lifetime Achievement in Sucky Dreck?

    JVW (1a2602)

  4. happyfeet — though I am not quite familiar with the Twilight series (not being a tween girl and all), I thought a friend of mine summarized the problem with those movies very succinctly. He pointed out that since 1966 it has been fully expected that a vampire movie will feature topless women at various points in the movie, and that Twilight had violated that sacred pact and, in fact, turned it on its head by featuring covered women and topless men. Just food for thought.

    JVW (1a2602)

  5. harlequinization

    happyfeet (ab5779)

  6. The fans of Airbender were a bit annoyed that a cartoon that featured all Asian heroes (well, two characters are Inuit/Eskimos) was turned into a feature film with all white kids.

    The Robin Hood story has an interesting background. It was originally pitched as having the Sheriff of Nottingham as the main character. The poor Sheriff was stuck between a mad king and a brigand in the woods of Sherwood Forest…

    Xmas (a79637)

  7. Never Say Never is the newest movie EVAH !!!!!!!!!

    William Yelverton (sockpuppet) (d4bbf1)

  8. The Twilight series has been hobbled by the fact that neither Hollywood nor the British theatre has any young male actors sufficiently talented to play heterosexual.

    SPQR (26be8b)

  9. JD, if you are going to sockpuppet outside of a sockpuppet thread, then identify as one, please.

    Aaron Worthing (73a7ea)

  10. The only Razzie-nominated 2010 movie I saw was Machete (nominated for Jessica Alba as Worst Actress.) I liked it. Maybe Rosario Dawson would have been better in Alba’s part, but everybody has already seen Dawson naked. If you like over-the-top comic violence, then Rodriguez’s movies like Machete, Planet Terror, and From Dusk Til Dawn are worth a look.

    gp (72be5d)

  11. Shyamalan should change his name to Shysterman. Well-produced crap is nothing more than crap wrapped in a pretty bow. It still stinks.

    Icy Texan (53dae7)

  12. I guess the worst movie I saw in 2010 was Law Abiding Citizen, which was just insultingly stupid. But that was actually a 2009 movie I think.

    gp (72be5d)

  13. gp

    alba is naked in machete? how could that possibly be a bad movie, then?

    Aaron Worthing (73a7ea)

  14. There’s a little scene of Alba in the shower. A little side-boob and butt. This part of her performance was subtle, deep, and sublime. You also get a glimpse of Blowhan’s massive funbags. But seriously, like I said above, Machete is NOT a bad movie; it’s over-the-top farce, fun stuff.

    gp (1330f9)

  15. He pointed out that since 1966 it has been fully expected that a vampire movie will feature topless women at various points in the movie, and that Twilight had violated that sacred pact and, in fact, turned it on its head by featuring covered women and topless men. Just food for thought.


    The real, true problem lies in Hollywood: Twilight-vs-Legion

    Vampires (soulless, evil creatures existing solely for the purpose of sucking the essence out of other creatures) are HEROES.

    Angels (Minions of God’s will) are VILLAINS.

    Now, I will kinda grant you that this started, AFAIK, with Joss Whedon’s Angel, but… Angel was a vampire who had a concience forced upon him, so that he understood the evil that he had done as a vampire, and set about attempting, in one way or another, to atone for it. In other words, he sought redemption, that is, God’s forgiveness and mercy, which, nominally, ALL creatures — even Satan’s minions — are capable of obtaining.

    The characters in Twilight, or True Blood, are not seekers of redemption, they’re “just like us”… well, except for the blood-sucking demon from hell part… Hey, other than that part, they’re just the peachy keen A-OK kinda guys you’d be happy to introduce to the Mom and Dad… assuming your name was, oh, Dahmer. Or Bundy. Or Berkowitz, or at least Menendez.

    IgotBupkis, President, United Anarchist Society (c9dcd8)

  16. Aston Kutcher in Killers ??
    WtF?? Really? Really?
    That’s the worst performance they could identify all year long?

    Gimme a break. It’s a light romantic comedy. If you went to it looking for deep acting, you should have your head examined.

    IgotBupkis, President, United Anarchist Society (c9dcd8)

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