Sockpuppet Friday!!!
[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.]
As usual, you are positively encouraged to engage in sock puppetry in this thread. The usual rules apply.
Please, be sure to switch back to your regular handle when commenting on other threads. I have made that mistake myself, alot.
And remember: the worst sin you can commit on this thread is not being funny.
Also please note that blogging might be a little light today and tomorrow. My wife’s “uncle” passed away. Mind you, Filipinos tend to use an expansive definition of “family” that includes people not technically related to them, but she was still close enough to him that she is pretty upset. I will try to fill this with something, but please do bear with me.
[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]
For God’s sake! All I did was fire a black guy!
Vivian Schiller (1d2640) — 10/22/2010 @ 1:38 pmMy condolences, Mr. and Mrs. AW.
DRJ, not a Sockpuppet (d43dcd) — 10/22/2010 @ 1:40 pmAW,
I’m sorry. Having a spouse lose someone they love is the absolute pits.
That said, I sure hate Christine O’donnell. She has olive breath.
Dustin (b54cdc) — 10/22/2010 @ 1:47 pmI have a sockpuppet ready…on my penis
Willie (f0c487) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:01 pmDid someone say Johnson?
Johnson (f0c487) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:02 pmIf I was a Pirate, And I was from Butte Montana. What kind of Pirate would I be?
ARRRGHHH (f0c487) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:04 pmThis blog’s a real blast!
And by that I do not mean it exploded in an effort to distract from an execution style murder of some lady that didn’t want me to molest a little girl.
BTW, please give Brad Friedman your money! And his loyal commenter Chris Hooten, could teach you a thing or two about being polite!
Person Pretending to be Brett Kimberlin, this is a joke, please don't sue/murder anybody Brett (b54cdc) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:10 pmI want my blog back…. does anyone know how to crack the password on WordPress?
Patterico (fb8750) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:24 pmI’m releasing these classified documents to stop the killing.
What do you mean it will get more people killed?
Julian Assange (1d2640) — 10/22/2010 @ 2:42 pmIs it a left to get back to the plantation?
Juan Williams (aefe1c) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:21 pmNext on the list of people to fire: Mara Liasson.
Eric Boehlert (d43dcd) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:24 pmFirst, they came for the black guy…
Mara Liasson (aefe1c) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:32 pmMy Speakership? I AM NOT in DENILE. De Nile is a river in Egypt.
Nancy P (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:35 pmIf I hadn’t stepped in and forced Nancy & Barry to provide billions to my freinds and buddies in the banking world, then we’d be in a really deep depression with say 10% unemployment.
Harry the Savior of the World Ecomony (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:40 pmDear Ms. Schiller: I hear Stepin Fechit is looking for a job at NPR. He can have mine!!
Juan Williams (848837) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:52 pmOh no! Massa NPR! Pleease doan’ throw me in that FOXNews Briar patch. Not the FoxNews briar patch!
Brer Williams (848837) — 10/22/2010 @ 3:55 pmReally funny Brer Williams. Damn, wish I came up with that one!
Cheshire Cat (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:14 pmA job opening at NPR? Don’t tell David Shuster.
Rick Sanchez (9d1bb3) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:14 pmThere is no evidence of discrimination at NPR.
AG Eric the man Holder (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:16 pmI don’t worry about the polls. As long as I’m not more than 5% down, the secret democratic voters (illegally registered and those from the grave yards), will carry me over. (Lessons I’ve learned from Chicago politics).
Barbara B (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:23 pmSo what if I’m at a party kissing butt with the Google people whose effective tax rate is 2.4% They are big democrat party backers. Why should they pay what the average US middle class taxpayer has to fork over?
The Pres. and dont' you forget it (0cd6a2) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:34 pmGot any good pix of woman wrestlers? I’ll pay $$$
Sent from my iPhone from Vietnam
Dick (69b3db) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:43 pmTed, this is Harry. Why haven’t you been returning my calls? I’m in a tight one here. Nevada ain’t no Massachusetts, you know.
Harry Reid (82ea8b) — 10/22/2010 @ 4:50 pmThat sounds slick!
The Honorable Hillary Rodham Clinton, Secretary of State of the whole US of A! (3e4784) — 10/22/2010 @ 5:20 pmMy condolences, too, A.W. We also have an extended family tradition in my culture.
nk (db4a41) — 10/22/2010 @ 5:26 pmThere’s still room out here on the porch, Juan.
Hon. Clarence Thomas (9d1bb3) — 10/22/2010 @ 5:45 pmWhy aren’t you scared of me? Maybe if I blow something up I will be relevant.
Brett Kimberlin (737dc8) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:03 pmHow dare those nasty Republicans send a libertarian to run against me!
And they even got Cindy Sheehan to endorse him!
nancy pelosi (3a3033) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:09 pmThe car is in the ditch and it’s a really deep ditch, but the old Republicans are just standing up there drinking something, but not Slurpees, because you know, that got old. So now they’re drinking something else.
So we’re down here, all of us, Reid, Pelosi, Hoyer and some new guys on my economic team, but I can’t remember their names because they’re new. And we’re pushing. Michelle is helping, too. She’s athletic and eats a lot of vegetables.
So we’re down in the ditch. The ditch is pretty deep. And we’re pushing and shoving, but it keeps getting deeper. So, we ask Clinton and his wife to help us out of the ditch, but they start arguing about who’s better at getting the car out of the ditch and it ends up being more trouble than it’s worth.
So, now there’s a crowd and they keep saying, just shift to “R” and you can get out of the ditch. But they don’t have Slurpees and they’re stupid and confused by the lack of Slurpees.
So we say, no, that won’t work. Maybe if we dig the ditch a little deeper, we can get momentum to get the car out of the ditch.
But, that doesn’t work because it started to rain.
So, I said, let’s go hitchhike and find a gas station so we can hire a wrecker to pull us out of the ditch.
Besides, I have a tee-time at 9 tomorrow and the ditch can wait.
The President (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:21 pmThat’s an Iowahawk caliber comment. Well done, sir.
DRJ, not a Sockpuppet (d43dcd) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:24 pmI’ve worked my whole life exposing the inherent racism of a system that keeps minorities on the fringe of success.
Then, some white woman says I need a psychiatrist.
I would ask for a do-over, but $2 million from a wacky Australian will suffice.
Juan (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:47 pmYou are all a bunch of meanie McMeanie-pants and doodooheads that do not care about fair elections like my BFF Brad Freidman and my oh shucks not-buddy Kimberlin. Racist stupid wingnazis.
Chris Hooten (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:48 pmAll I had to do was scrub O’Reilly’s back with a loofah and call it a falafel and we became buds forever. Oh, how I love playing with the Billy Pulpit.
Juan Williams (ae99e7) — 10/22/2010 @ 6:52 pmAnd Oh God how great it feels to not have to fake being a LINO any longer. Now I’m truly right. About everything! These people believe in me!!!! They believe in ME!
So maybe I will, too, somdeday. Oh God I love Rupert’s money!
Thank Gawd that sugar daddy Georgie Soros came through with a million for us and another million for our BFF’s at MediaMatters.
NPR Lady (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:01 pmThis isn’t working out the way I expected.
A-rod (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:09 pmI have a big gavel. I smile a lot. I know the voters in my district have only the best interests of the nation.
So, please, for all that is good and holy, shut up.
Nancy (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:17 pmB-b-b-but Sarah Palin is dumb. Team “R” is gay. And bumblefuck is…well, bumblefuck.
Happierfeet (aefe1c) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:18 pmI only smile a lot because I am not capable of any other facial expressions.
Nancy (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:21 pmYou’re welcome!
Botox (aefe1c) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:24 pmI heart you so so much, Oh Great Speaker. I dream of you lustily, and your images have made my Magic Sock happy countless times.
Chris Hooten (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:26 pmWhat! Chuck Norris is their closer?
Derek Jeter (02509e) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:27 pmI am so freaking superior to all of you peons. Me and my friends, the pseudo-intellectual superior class in the journalism and media on the coast are simply better people, with better upbringing, education, and moral character. I pity you rubes and your hate. Now, I have to run off to a very important meeting. I will check back later to see if any of you knuckle-dragging neanderthals could manage a substantive response. Later, haters.
Myron (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:29 pmJeff Goldstein is teh Awesome!
Darleen Click (bd7e62) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:34 pmOf course my good friend Juan had to go; it’s simply against NPR rules to act as a political pundit.
Mara Liasson (bd7e62) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:35 pmI’m dead serious here now. People really don’t realize how fabulous what we’re trying to do is. It’s really fabulous. It transcends fabulous. It is so fabulous that fabulous is just a word that means its transcendent in the sense that is fabulous. Just like that Lady Gaga that all the young people like right now.
Valarie Jarrett (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:45 pmThat tea bagger Angle’s new ad about me and Barcky pretty much neutered both of us. Ouch.
Hairy Reed (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 7:49 pmThe witching hour is getting closer.
Christine O'Donnell (9d1bb3) — 10/22/2010 @ 8:05 pmWhat? I am the dude. Oh well, I’m rich.
A-rod (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 8:13 pmWhen I am not sockpuppeting, changing genders for my names, and otherwise making an are of myself, I get all of my talking points from the soros family of websites, which makes me all tingly.
Willie Yelverton (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 8:19 pmI am an example of the open minded faux academics that know they are superior to the genetically inferior conservatives.
Willie Yelverton (eb1dfe) — 10/22/2010 @ 8:38 pmWhat? We’re the Yankees!
Joe Girardi (743fd1) — 10/22/2010 @ 8:41 pmI am the Great and Powerful Donk. Pay no attention to that curtain over there.
Jack Burro (9e8ad9) — 10/22/2010 @ 10:41 pmOK… who in the hell keeps turning me into a newt?
Dustin (b54cdc) — 10/22/2010 @ 11:35 pmAt a Las Vegas campaign rally with President Obama on Friday 10/22/2010:
Harry Reid (d43dcd) — 10/23/2010 @ 10:52 amDear Cheshire Cat @#17: Thanks for the grins!!
Brer Williams (f10de7) — 10/23/2010 @ 1:10 pm🙂
My condolences to your wife and family for the loss of your Uncle. I too have a Filipina bride, and I understand the family thing. It would do us all well if we all had such a broad sense of family.
God bless.
djb (ea43f1) — 10/24/2010 @ 3:34 pmI had so much fun playing this week…A great chance to let off steam..
Cheshirecat, not the sockpuppet (0cd6a2) — 10/26/2010 @ 4:34 pmCan we play again next week?? <nuzzle, nuzzle, purr, purr)
Current newsbites are sending me over lots of ammo. 🙂
Cheshire Cat, not the sockpuppet (0cd6a2) — 10/26/2010 @ 4:40 pm