Yes, Ann Coulter says a lot of really wretched things, but she also can be pretty amusing. Via Allah [UPDATE: and WLS!], this Joel Stein column is actually funny — but it’s really Coulter (whom I was in a room with last night) who makes it so. Joel Stein decided to try to manufacture some goofy Coulter quotes in a “Mad Libs” style column by asking Coulter for words that he would randomly plug into sentences he had written. The thing is, her responses are often funnier than his sentences. For example:
[Liberals] don’t believe in the Constitution (you know, that piece of paper that Bill Clinton thought was for cleaning up [something messy] DEMOCRATS’ POSITION ON NATIONAL SECURITY after he [verb, past tense] JITTERBUGGED.
When I was on [obscure cable news show] ANYTHING ON MSNBC, I mentioned to fellow guest [grumpy old white man] WALTER CRONKITE that, scientifically, men are [any number] 47 times more likely to accomplish [an incredible feat] A LIBERAL LISTENING POLITELY TO AN OPPOSING POINT OF VIEW than women, who should stay at home and focus on [obsolete chore] BUTTER CHURNING.
So while my Godless, liberal detractors are in hell with the [non-Christian group] MASONS, [ethnic group] ALEUTS, [occupation, plural] DOCTORS and [deceased Democrat] MIKE GRAVEL, I’ll be in heaven dying my hair and not eating. Because the one person I haven’t offended is God.
By the way, what is Stein saying when he talks about Coulter “dying” her hair? Is he suggesting that she is killing it by dyeing it?
Anyway, good stuff. I don’t usually say that about a Joel Stein column, but it isn’t really just a Joel Stein column.
UPDATE: D’oh! That’s what I get for not reading my own blog before posting! WLS has already posted on this here.
WLS semi-accuses Stein of ripping off an NRO idea. Oh, I don’t know. I doubt Stein reads NRO.
UPDATE x2: This, however, is quite an amazing coincidence indeed.