I have a shocking announcement to make: I will support a Democrat filibuster of George W. Bush’s next nominee.

As long as it’s a “filibuster” as defined by Joe Biden.

Biden, remember, recently accused Judge John Roberts of “filibustering” in his Senate confirmation hearings. Here is a transcript of the pertinent exchange. Note that the portion of Roberts’s answer immediately before Biden accused him of “filibustering” was fifteen words long:

BIDEN: Justice Ginsburg said precisely what position she agreed on.

Did she, in fact, somehow compromise herself when she answered that question?

ROBERTS: She said no hints, no forecasts, no previews.

BIDEN: No, no. Judge, she specifically, in response to a question whether or not she agreed with the majority or minority opinion in Moore v. the City of Cleveland said explicitly: I agree with the majority, and here’s what the majority said and I agree with it.

My question to you is: Do you agree with it or not?

ROBERTS: Well, I do know, Senator, that in numerous other cases — because I read the transcript…

BIDEN: So did I.

ROBERTS: … she took the position that she should not comment.
Justice O’Connor took the same position. She was asked about a particular case.

BIDEN: Oh, Judge…

(CROSSTALK)

ROBERTS: She said, It’s not correct for me to comment.
Now, there’s a reason for that.

BIDEN: But you’re going from the…

SPECTER: Wait a minute, Senator Biden. He’s not finished his answer.

BIDEN: He’s filibustering, Senator.

I propose that, in the debate over President Bush’s next nominee, Democrats be allowed to “filibuster” Biden-style. Each Democrat Senator will be allowed to speak as long as they wish — with a fifteen-word limit.

Call them the Gang of Fifteen . . . Words.

(Said in the super-fast voice used for disclaimers at the end of radio commercials: Pauses between words may not exceed 20 seconds. No more than 2 breaths per syllable. Words from the movie “Mary Poppins” not permitted.)