The Jury Talks Back


Fake Steve Jobs on AT&T

Filed under: Uncategorized — Kevin M @ 11:53 am

If you have an iPhone, and especially if you’ve heard AT&T’s whining about how the iPhone is tapping out their network’s data bandwidth, this is worth a few minutes read.

[Regarding Meet the Beatles] Now, the thing about that album was, on the day it hit the U.S. the whole world changed. Like, before that day, the world was one way, music was one way, culture was one way — and then after that day the world was never the same ever again, and as soon as you heard that album you knew that, and even if you were only nine years old, which I was, you just knew. You knew. Sales were crazy. I mean nuts. The thing was a huge smash hit. By April, twelve weeks after that album came out, the Beatles had the top five spots on the Billboard chart.

Now there was a lot of demand for that record — so much that the plant that printed the records could not keep up. Now here’s the lesson. Do you think the guys who were running Capitol Records said, Gee whiz, the kids are buying up this record at such a crazy pace that our printing plant can’t keep up — we’d better find a way to slow things down. Maybe we can create an incentive that would discourage people from buying the record. Do you think they said that? No, they did not. What they did was, they went out and found another printing plant. And another one and another one, until they could make as many records as people wanted.

Then he gets mean.


  1. I so very much hope that AT&T’s words/actions cause Apple to take the iPhone to another carrier. Like Verizon.

    That would be God Damn hilarious.

    Also, I would be able to get one without leaving my cellphone service provider (whom I love).

    Comment by Scott Jacobs — 12/17/2009 @ 12:41 pm

  2. Oh god, within the first paragraph is maybe my favorite part – and it applies to oh so many companies today:

    when the stars align, and the hardware is great and the ecosystem is great and the apps are great and the whole experience is great, and everything you do just makes everything else better, and you’re totally on a roll and can do no wrong — when that happens, you do not go out and try to fuck it all up by discouraging people who love your product. What you do, instead, is you fix your fucking shitty ass network you fucking shit-eating-grin-wearing hillbilly ass clown!

    It’s like reading stuff I might write, if I were witty. :)

    Comment by Scott Jacobs — 12/17/2009 @ 12:44 pm

  3. I had Verizon. Didn’t work at my house. Their “3G” Voyager phone was such a turd that I was happy when it got stolen. Served the thief right. It took about 4 minutes to load my Google home page, and EVEN WITH A HARD KEYBOARD, you couldn’t enter text because the software couldn’t avoid moving the cursor with the slightest impulse.

    Now I have an iPhone. Still doesn’t work at the house (over 3G). But I don’t need a phone there, anyway. Everywhere else it works like a dream. Two taps on the phone and within 15 seconds I have a full traffic map where I am, down to surface streets. Or an RPN calculator, or a game machine, or email, or…

    I keep telling myself the AT&T 3G network isn’t that bad, and in fact it works pretty well for me. YMMV.

    Comment by Kevin Murphy — 12/17/2009 @ 1:58 pm

  4. Most of the time I would use data with my phone I am around wifi. Work, transit, home.

    I’m really lucky to have a phone that has wifi, a good browser, good media, and was cheap (free w/K).

    It’s only a matter of time before

    mobile broadband : cable internet

    becomes like

    cell phone : landline

    and I don’t need two connections. Probably should buy stock or something, but I’m Galt right now.

    Comment by Dustin — 12/17/2009 @ 11:14 pm

  5. Ironically, in the bolded section, replace the word “buying” with the word “downloading” and the lesson could be given right back to the subject of the example.

    Comment by Buzz Killington — 12/18/2009 @ 5:11 am

  6. Cifomsizphoff

    Comment by Mandideomia — 1/5/2010 @ 8:37 am

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