The Jury Talks Back

7/24/2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — fat tony @ 11:46 am

“She’s a wise Latina. He’s a stupid cop. Together they fight crime…”

COLOR OF AUTHORITY, coming this fall to MSM.

Starring “Red Sonia” Sotomayor and Harvey Keitel as Officer Y. T. Pigg, MSM brings you a fresh take on a tired genre. COLOR OF AUTHORITY.

She puts the salsa on his saltine. He puts the Twinkie in her insulin. She’ll summarily dismiss your case, but he’ll put a cap in your ass for looking at him crosswise.

Together, they’ve got ATTITUDE.

COLOR OF AUTHORITY.

See what the critics are saying:

“Let me be clear, uh, as I’ve previously said, uh, I don’t have all the facts, but from what I hear, this show re-affirms my core beliefs. That’s my favorite kind of story.
Don’t be distracted–you MUST see COLOR OF AUTHORITY. Look, I’m not kidding. You will respect COLOR OF AUTHORITY.
–Barack Francis Xavier Obama

“What he said. Wait, what I said. No–what he said… Does not compute. Does not compute. Circuits failing…”
–Barack S. Prompter

“Aren’t Barack’s eyes just the dreamiest?”
–Tom Shales

“When Woody and I…”
–Dick Cavett

You’ve finally got a reason to get a digital converter. Get your coupon and join us this fall for COLOR OF AUTHORITY. Please?

COLOR OF AUTHORITY, A BM Production

Episode One:
The Curious Case of the Taillight that Didn’t Break in the Night

Act I:
“Screen Test”

(Judge Sotomayor and Office Pigg meet cute)

Pigg: Do you know how fast you were going ma’am? What’s the rush? You trying to socialize health care?

Judge: Do you have any idea of who I am?! I’m late for my confirmation hearings. If I don’t have time to prepare, I might say something stupid.

Pigg: Too late for that, ma’am.

Judge: You wouldn’t say that if I were white.
(attempts to drive away)

Pigg: Please step out of the car, ma’am.

Judge: I’m calling my lawyer, Skip Gates.

Pigg: (sotto voce) Dispatch–Officer requests backup.

Judge: What did you say to me? Crack up?! I bet you’d like me barefoot and pregnant, too! Racist and sexist!!

Pigg: I simply requested backup, ma’am. I didn’t mean to imply anything else.

Judge: Oh (hurt tone)

Pigg: I’ll go easy on you today, but it will be harder on you next time. I mean, uh… (face flushes)
Have a nice day, ma’am.

Judge: Oh, I intend to, officer, I intend to. You’ve been very racially sensitive.

(Pigg fumbles embarrassedly back to car. Judge looks in mirror and chuckles knowingly.)

(CUT TO TITLE)

1 Comment

  1. Sounds like a winner. Or maybe not, depending on your point of view.

    Comment by PatAZ — 7/24/2009 @ 3:24 pm

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