The Jury Talks Back

6/15/2009

Fat Tony Sings

Filed under: Uncategorized — fat tony @ 7:20 pm

Hi all,

I don’t write much here because you all seem to have the bases covered. I haven’t really had much to add, but I want to try. Unfortunately, incisive political commentary, amazing research skills and timeliness aren’t my strong suits. For the next few days I’ll put up some older pieces I’ve done. Let me know if you want to see more (or less). And let me know if language is an issue. We can’t all be Scott Jacobs. :-)

This is a piece I put up back when I thought there was no way that this country would elect Barack Obama. I think it was right around the time of the seal. There are a lot of things I would fix now. Mostly, though, I want to make clear that I am not a Birther, I just like tweaking the O-bots. And, if you read that far, please realize I’m not mocking Michelle Obama’s looks, but Barack caught in flagrante. Jeez, the bases we have to cover anymore…

THE CANDIDATE GENERAL’S SONG
(after Gilbert and Sullivan (and Iowahawk!); to be played on a rusty calliope)

I’m the very model of a modern Candidate-General.
I’ve information vegetable (especially arugul…)
Uh…uh… O! I am clean and bright and uh…uh… articulate.
Did I ever tell you, from Harvard Law did I matriculate?
I’m very well acquainted, too, with people communistical.
I ditch them when they “dis” me Kos I’m very egotistical.
With my flip-flopping positions, it seems I’m always in the news.
But be assured I’ll screw Israel Kos it’s full of fucking Joos

But be assured He’ll screw Israel Kos it’s full of fucking Joos!
We’re sure He’ll screw Israel with a “Farrakhan you” to the Joos!
Yes, rest assured He’ll screw Israel Kos it’s Pfleging full of Joos!

Tell the bitter clingy yokels I’m THE post racial candidate
Do not look behind the curtain; ignore my church that preaches hate.
I said, in matters vegetable (especially arugul…)
Uh, let’s say I’m a suitable modern Candidate General.

He said, in matters vegetable (especially arugul…)
O! says that He’s a suitable modern Candidate General.
You have read my mythic histories, how Barry became Barack.
Who’s sayin’ Obama cannot win? This election is a lock!
I need to buy a longer bus cuz there’s no more room below it.
That’s where past and present friends go cuz I don’t intend to blow it.
Samantha Powers and Jim Johnson and ole Jeremiah Wright
Goolsby and my own Grandma (did I ever tell you she is white?).
My flag-trampling friend Bill Ayers, yes, the man I barely even know,
Has an “explosive” personality, so he’ll be last to go.

His “explosive” personality, ensures he’ll be last to go!
It’s just like it was in the 60’s: he’s always the last to go!
If your Daddy always paid your bills, then you would be last to go!
(more…)


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