Patterico's Pontifications

7/6/2016

Dog Trainer Sends Out the Intern to Defend Hillary

Filed under: General — JVW @ 12:59 pm



[guest post by JVW]

This is just too sad and depressing for words. The Los Angeles Times opinion section, knowing that they needed to deliver a defense of former Secretary of State and IT whiz, Hillary! Rodham Clinton, apparently couldn’t rouse any of the feeble minds on their editorial board — which coughed up a tepid editorial managing to both vindicate and rebuke Her Clintonic Majesty — nor any of the laughably otiose columnists on the payroll (looking at you Patttt Morrison and Jon Healey) to undertake the thankless task. And David Horse’s Ass Horsey is apparently incapable of thinking up a way to link Secretary Clinton’s email crimes directly to the GOP, so he too is taking a pass. Thus, in casting about the op/ed department to find the one person who will rise up to mount a defense of the woman whom everyone on staff with the exception of Jonah Goldberg wants to see win in November, they finally found their patsy champion:

The freaking intern.

Seriously, folks, today’s paper carries an opinion piece written by one Melissa Batchelor Warnke bearing the headline “Hillary Clinton didn’t go where David Petraeus and Scooter Libby did.” As usual, it’s a disjointed collection of DNC claptrap and I don’t particularly recommend anyone bothering to read it. The only possible way to explain Ms. Warnke’s argument is as follows: both Libby and Petraeus lied to FBI investigators, but Hillary! Clinton only lied to the American public. And, for the record, Ms. Warnke does agree with James Comey that Secretary Clinton’s actions in this affair were “extremely reckless.” But her contention is that because it did not involve “deliberate leaks,” that the decision to forgo prosecution is the right one.

But that’s not what is notable about this very uninteresting pro forma defense of the presumptive Democrat candidate. What is eye-opening is the identifying paragraph appended to the bottom of Ms. Warnke’s piece: “Batchelor Warnke [oh, she’s one of those that uses two last names; my bad] is an intern in The Times’ Opinion section. Follow her on Twitter @velvetmelvis.” Cogitate on that for a moment: the Dog Trainer is now sending the intern to the party’s rescue. If you check out Ms. Batchelor Warnke’s Twitter page you will see that she has all of the requisite lefty opinions (Abortion? Loves it. Guns? Hates them. Police? Doesn’t trust them.) that one in her position is expected to have, so no doubt she’ll be promoted to full-time intern columnist once the Dog Trainer goes through their next round of staff layoffs and buyouts. Apparently this is not Ms. Batchelor Warnke’s first stint as an intern. She has a tweet from yesterday mentioning that she was an unpaid lackey on Capitol Hill ten years ago. It’s a sad fact of modern life that full-time jobs are harder and harder to come by, but if it is coming down to having to take an internship in your late 20s in a dying industry then maybe you should just see if Starbucks is hiring or if Pago Pago needs more English teachers.

But, anyway, I’m sure Hillary! appreciates that someone on Spring Street has her back.

– JVW

22 Responses to “Dog Trainer Sends Out the Intern to Defend Hillary”

  1. this is the paper what suppressed the khalidi tape

    hiding information from the public is what they do

    happyfeet (a037ad)

  2. This Melissa Batchelor Warnke is just another 20-something year old intern to give service to a Clinton.

    Cruz Supporter (102c9a)

  3. it’s a devil wears prada thing,

    narciso (732bc0)

  4. You get what you pay for.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  5. The Koch’s should have bought it out of BK, making the creditors an offer the judge couldn’t refuse. If all the regulars quit as they threatened, it would have saved them a bundle in severance. As long as the sports page stayed the same, no one would have cared.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  6. *Kochs

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  7. Hillary probably did lie. Who says she didn’t? And she sure would have if they had interviewed her before she had her story straight.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  8. you have to buy it through proxies, like adelson did the las vegas journal

    narciso (732bc0)

  9. I thought the press and the rest of the liberal world thought and described Hillary as the most brilliant female on the planet. If so, how could she not understand her actions were extremely reckless and the risks to others due to her actions. She knew exactly what she was doing. It is clear she intentionally used her own server and email to keep emails from being seen under FOI requests and to hide matters she didn’t want the world to know about (like the emails she sent to her son-in-law based on inside information about Greece in order to help is hedge fund). It is just sick that someone can clearly skirt the law and then get away so cleanly, when any mortal would have been behind bars for the same. To claim ignorance or “bad judgement” when you are supposed to be brilliant and an attorney no less who knows that ignorance is supposed to be no excuse.

    Greg (2eb833)

  10. Does anyone want to bet that her conduct of foreign policy while SecState was any less reckless? I mean someone really pissed Putin off.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  11. Does anyone want to bet that her conduct of foreign policy while SecState was any less reckless? I mean someone really pissed Putin off.

    But what could she have possibly done to piss Putin off? I mean she pretty much fawned all over Russia with her stupid Reset button, and Obama himself was caught on mic telling Medvedev to let his boss know that in Obama’s second term he would be a meek pussycat for the Russian bear, so if Putin feels anything towards us it is probably amazement and disgust rather than anger.

    JVW (eabb2a)

  12. Does anyone want to bet that her conduct of foreign policy while SecState was any less reckless? I mean someone really pissed Putin off.

    But what could she have possibly done to piss Putin off? I mean she pretty much fawned all over Russia with her stupid Reset button,

    Well, Putin’s a real stickler for spelling.

    CayleyGraph (353727)

  13. It is just sick that someone can clearly skirt the law and then get away so cleanly, when any mortal would have been behind bars for the same.

    Hillary violated security protocols for the same reason Bill abused women, because she could.

    ropelight (596f46)

  14. well they did have latitude in the ukraine, up to a point, although the events of 2013-2014, probably did not please volodya, nor supporting the gulf’s proxies in syria,

    narciso (732bc0)

  15. There’s still a Los Angeles Times? Who knew.

    hunson abedeer (80144e)

  16. I guess Putin didn’t like what he read in her private emails.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  17. Kevin M (25bbee) — 7/6/2016 @ 3:07 pm

    I mean someone really pissed Putin off.

    Victoria Nuland, after Hillary Clinton was no longer Secretary of State.

    http://www.wsj.com/articles/putins-press-propagandists-1467761144

    For Kremlin PR managers who control the media, writes Mr. Ostrovsky, “words and images no longer signaled reality; rather, reality was constructed to validate what had been seen” on television. In the process, in order to create the trope of the mighty Russian fortress, Russia’s enemies needed to be endowed with unimaginable capability and perfidy. So after the Russian annexation of Crimea in 2014, Ukraine ceased being the broken country it was and became a neo-fascist bastion of NATO aspirations. The Euromaidan toppling of the Yanukovych regime could not be portrayed as actions by the Ukrainian population itself, but had to be constructed as an evil plot conducted by that angel of darkness, State Department Assistant Secretary of State Victoria Nuland. Above all, it was necessary to deny that the Ukrainian uprising had arisen organically, given that the same process was being so rigorously suppressed in Russia.

    Sammy Finkelman (88f52d)

  18. as usual she doesn’t know what she’s talking about,

    http://www.nytimes.com/2016/07/07/us/hillary-clintons-email-was-probably-hacked-experts-say.html?_r=0

    I wonder if she’s any relation to paul warnke, democratic legal powerhouse and arms control negotiator,

    narciso (732bc0)

  19. yes, it seems she’s been more than an intern,

    http://melissabatchelorwarnke.com/bio/

    narciso (732bc0)

  20. yes, it seems she’s been more than an intern,

    From narciso’s link:

    Melissa Batchelor Warnke is a writer and the interviews editor at The Rumpus. She studies investigative reporting at the UC Berkeley Graduate School of Journalism, where she is a Dean’s Merit Fellow.

    Goodness gracious! I was on the first crew to receive The Rumpus. It was (is?) a set of letters to which one subscribed so that every week or thereabouts for a year you received a new letter from some (mostly second-tier or lower) writer. They weren’t personalized, they were instead rather generic and sent to a broad audience (at least, as broad as their subscriber base was). Some author wrote polemics, some wrote whimsical stuff, some wrote biographical/confessional pieces (no, millennial writer, I really don’t care about your sex life, varied though it may be), and some just wrote stream-of-consciousness dreck that was as pretentious as it was hollow. It must have been four or five years ago that I was receiving those letters. Interesting to hear that it apparently is still around.

    Her writing has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, the San Francisco Chronicle, VICE, The Daily Beast, Pacific Standard, U.S. News & World Report, The Hairpin, BKLYNR, and other places.

    She has been named a Fulbright Scholar, a Kathryn Wasserman Davis Fellow for Peace, a Journalism and Women Symposium (JAWS) Emerging Journalist Fellow, and a StartingBloc Social Innovation Fellow, among other honors.

    Prior to becoming a journalist, Melissa worked as an anti-genocide community organizer at the Save Darfur Coalition, a human rights grantmaker in the Open Society Foundations’ Africa Office, and an assistant in the Google Creative Lab.

    My word, she is absolutely perfect for the Dog Trainer editorial page, isn’t she?

    JVW (eabb2a)

  21. “…the laughably otiose columnists on the payroll (looking at you Patttt Morrison….”

    So funny.

    AZ Bob (d6a3a9)

  22. Great blog post, JVW. Thanks for the laughs.

    GrandmaP (b8dd10)


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