Emily Litella on France’s Gun Control Laws
[Guest post by Emily Litella]
Patterico.com recognizes its obligation to present responsible opposing viewpoints to its editorials when we feel like it. Here to reply to a recent editorial is Ms. Emily Litella.
EMILY LITELLA: After the attacks in Paris, many of my friends have criticized the attacks as an episode of “gun violence.” I agree! France should not have a “right to bear arms.” People wanting to buy guns should have to get “a hunting or shooting sporting license that requires a psychological evaluation and regular renewal.” There should be permits required for “[s]emi-automatic rifles that can hold more than three rounds, as well as rifles and handguns with military-grade calibers.” And [pounds the table] fully automatic weapons should be completely illegal for civilians! If I had anything to do with it, illegally purchasing a gun would lead to a punishment of [Chevy Chase starts to tap Ms. Litella gently on the left shoulder] a “maximum of seven years in prison, plus a fine” — [Chevy Chase continues to tap her shoulder] . . . yes?
CHEVY CHASE: Everything you just said is already the law today in France. They already have strict gun control.
EMILY LITELLA: Oh! I see.
. . . .
. . . .
Never mind!
— Emily Litella
An appeal to the old folks.
Patterico (86c8ed) — 11/15/2015 @ 6:55 pmYou made all that up, didn’t you? There really is no Emily Litella, is there?
Gramps, the original (bc022b) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:22 pmI wonder if the Brits think they are immune to ‘gun violence’ from islamic terrorists.
seeRpea (71d373) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:23 pmI’d feel better if all the people who spout off like Emily were doing so out of political expediency. Unfortunately many of them (probably the majority) are actually just that stupid.
After these many years I sometimes get Emily Litella mixed up with Roseanne Rosannadanna.
Mark Johnson (a64489) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:24 pmman, what a talent Gilda Radner was. Can’t remember where I saw it, but she and her husbankd (Gene Wilder) did a skit that was tears inducing.
seeRpea (71d373) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:28 pmanyway, look up “Soviet Jewery” (https://f.vimeocdn.com/p/flash/moogaloop/6.2.8/moogaloop.swf?clip_id=9220868#!flashvars#clip_id=9220868&api=1&moogaloop_type=moogaloop&noscript)
the reality, only belatedly arrived at:
http://hotair.com/headlines/archives/2015/11/15/belgian-minister-government-lacks-control-of-neighborhood-linked-to-terror-plots/
narciso (ee1f88) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:40 pmI’ve had a bit of fun recently, pointing out that the city of Dunedin, New Zealand has had over the last 30 years, a mass murder (public random shootings over 4 victims) rate something like 100x that of the US over the same time on a victims/per capita basis. In fact, the country as a whole has had only two events during that time and on those alone we’re doing worse.
Mass shootings are really, really random. In a large population, you’re going to have more of them.
scrubone (c3104f) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:41 pm“What’s all this talk I keep hearing about presidential erections?!!”
“Oh, never mind.”
Mark (f713e4) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:47 pmI think they should politely remind all incoming Jihadis that Europe is a “gun-free zone” and that they should kindly leave their firearms behind and behave properly as guests when invading and overrunning Europe.
I am sure they will all understand and this whole mess will have been cleared up by a simple appeal to reason and logic.
Get trained, get armed and get prepared. It won’t be long until this happens at a mall or stadium or restaurant near you.
WarEagle82 (44dbd0) — 11/15/2015 @ 7:50 pmThe guerilla must swim in the population as the fish swims in the sea. Hide in plain sight. That is the French weakness and our weakness. Multiculturalism and multidermochromaticism. Ok, our two weaknesses. Multiculturalism, multidermochromaticism, and polyglotism. Our three weaknesses — multiculturalism, multidermochromaticism, polyglotism, and a false sense of security. Our four weaknesses … aw bugger!
nk (dbc370) — 11/15/2015 @ 8:59 pmthat’s why i don’t go to either sort of target any more…well, the occasional small restaurant, maybe, but not major venues.
always scan, always locate the various exits, and identify and memorize the location of field expedient weapons. i’d CCW, but i don’t feel like going to prison here in #Failifornia.
redc1c4 (0e5599) — 11/15/2015 @ 9:10 pmCalifornia causes cancer.
nk (dbc370) — 11/15/2015 @ 9:19 pmand never sit with your back to an entrance/doorway, unless there are multiple ones, in which case try to be there with other observant folks, and not sheep.
redc1c4 (0e5599) — 11/15/2015 @ 9:23 pmSeriously. There is no populated area in California where you will not see a sign like this after a few minutes there. http://www.bobdorigojones.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/disney_sign-OCSmallBusiness.com_.jpg
nk (dbc370) — 11/15/2015 @ 9:30 pmThis is true. The signs are everywhere. In stores, in amusement parks, in businesses . . . everywhere.
Patterico (86c8ed) — 11/15/2015 @ 10:37 pmWarning: NaCl causes cancer.
John Hitchcock (04afab) — 11/15/2015 @ 11:07 pmWarning: The lack of NaCl causes imminent death.
And just like almost any other Californian, I’ve just gotten to where I simply ignore them. Blind to them, you might say.
I really wish the government would stop trying to nanny me. I really do know enough not to eat lead chips. The ones that don’t know or don’t care? Darwin will know his own.
Bill H (2a858c) — 11/15/2015 @ 11:23 pmDo this, Don’t do that, Can’t you read the sign.
mg (31009b) — 11/16/2015 @ 12:40 amSign says:
PROFILE and KEEP YOUR WEAPONS CLEAN and LOADED
sign I wish were true
mg (31009b) — 11/16/2015 @ 12:52 amPaul Ryan- Deported.
how mang gun violence deaths have their been in france this year compared to ameriKKKa?
beni (33b90c) — 11/16/2015 @ 1:18 amWarning: Lack of brain cells causes perpetual Democrat control of state assemblies.
papertiger (c2d6da) — 11/16/2015 @ 1:33 amHow many white 80 year old Democrats live in white communities while claiming Republicans in multi-ethnic families are racist? I know of one. He lives in Lewes, Delaware.
John Hitchcock (04afab) — 11/16/2015 @ 2:39 amI need to buy a vowel, John.
papertiger (c2d6da) — 11/16/2015 @ 3:55 amI saw what you did there, John Hitchcock.
Rev. Barack Hussein Hoagie™ (f4eb27) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:02 amSo, the one jihadi they captured alive, he’s going to be charged with firearms violations, right? That’ll show him!
The Dana who isn't an attorney (f6a568) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:21 amNanny queries:
1)It is being reported the French PM knew plans for Fri 11/13 attack were being drawn up.
2)ISIL was definitively implicated immediately prior to their obligatory taking of responsibility.
3)The fact that the Syrian passport found with a homicide bomber’s parts was a forgery was rendered irrelevant because his assembled fingers passed thru Greece.
4)The intelligence that the plan of attack was drawn up in Syria lead to immediate retaliation against the ISIL stronghold on the Syria/Iraq border.
5)A manhunt is now underway for the getaway driver of the concert venue assassins after he was stopped at the Belgian border and released.
6)ISIL managed to thwart their ongoing invasion of Western Europe, a strategic faceplant.
Hmmmmm.
DNF (755a85) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:22 amI was in Brussels in September and saw many, many Muslims. There are areas that we drove through where the streets are a sort of open market, like a flea market that goes for blocks. Lots of women in burkhas.
That appears to be ground zero for Europe as the planning was done there.
Of course, the LA Times reports that French Muslims fear reprisals although I’m not sure who would be reprising who since no one but Muslims go into those “No Go Zones” that we are assured don’t exist.
In the wake of Friday’s terrorism strikes in Paris, some residents of this suburb – built in the 1970s to offer a cheaper, more spacious alternative to city living, but now mostly home to poorer immigrants – faced the possibility that some might view them as the enemy.
Why would anyone do that, I wonder ?
Mike K (90dfdc) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:31 am20. Like how many Americans have been taken hostage and shot while randomly shopping in Jewish delis?
Lessee, why, none?
Ok, how many Americans have been shot randomly attending concerts in Jewish-owned venues, the remainder taken hostage and then blown to bits when the authorities arrive.
Yeah, we thought so.
Bet we can do this for hours, huh?
DNF (755a85) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:33 amIts not an accident they targeted the bataclan, a Jewish owned establishment that was proudly pro Israel.
narciso (ee1f88) — 11/16/2015 @ 6:54 amthis is the fellow who apparently had no trouble in procuring weapons,
https://emmejihad.wordpress.com/tag/abdelhamid-abaaoud/
narciso (ee1f88) — 11/16/2015 @ 7:09 amGuantanameraGuantanamo BayGuantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
I’m a bomb-throwing man , I’m from where camels are loved
I’m a bomb-throwing man , I’m from where camels are loved
and before I die I want to sing the verses of my soul
Chorus: Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
I carry Kalishnakov rifle, a Quran, wear a suicide bomb vest
I carry Kalishnakov rifle, a Quran, wear a suicide bomb vest
I kill the infidels, who give me sanctuary
Chorus: Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
My vest is camouflage color but soon will be carmine too
My vest is camouflage color and soon will be carmine too
My show is on a long road trip, it will be coming to you
Chorus: Guantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 11/16/2015 @ 7:13 amGuantanamo Bay, Hejira, Guantanamo Bay
that’s sacrilege, colonel.
narciso (ee1f88) — 11/16/2015 @ 7:16 amthat lyric goes ‘I am a sincere man, from where the palm tree grows’ as you can tell Pete Seeger had no understanding of this,
narciso (ee1f88) — 11/16/2015 @ 7:23 amOne ton of metal?
Why he carry one ton of metal?
(Credit Xrlq)
One ton of metal;
He’ll blow you up with one ton of metal.
One of the sappiest songs from the sappy-hippie era when the flower children badly needed weeding. Not as bad as Joan Baez or Janis Ian, but then nothing could be.
nk (dbc370) — 11/16/2015 @ 8:19 am31. Nicely done, you have a gift.
DNF (ffe548) — 11/16/2015 @ 8:36 amColonel Haiku (2601c0) — 11/16/2015 @ 7:13 am
Kudos, Colonel.
felipe (b5e0f4) — 11/16/2015 @ 8:40 amPapertiger, here’s your vowel:
John Hitchcock (ded0bd) — 11/16/2015 @ 8:43 amHoagie and I are each members of multi-ethnic families. Perry is the Democrat I described.
thanks, gents!
Colonel Haiku (2601c0) — 11/16/2015 @ 8:44 amThat has to be the most computer savvy octogenarian I’ve ever heard of.
Most of em can’t even change the channel on the tv without help.
This one changes pseudonyms like socks.
It’s incredible.
papertiger (c2d6da) — 11/16/2015 @ 9:30 amHe has teachers for that. PIATOR from New Zealand, to name one. And he has had to resort to that because he’s been banned too many places, and the website of his that adj Dana paid for just doesn’t get any visitors, so his rants echo through huge, empty caverns.
John Hitchcock (ded0bd) — 11/16/2015 @ 9:54 amApplause, Col.
mg (31009b) — 11/16/2015 @ 12:29 pm