Patterico's Pontifications

10/11/2015

Classic ’90s-Era Onion: “Crazed Palestinian Gunman Angered By Stereotypes”

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 6:40 pm



A classic Onion piece from 1997 is making the rounds on the Facebook today. I thought it might be worth sharing here.

HEBRON, WEST BANK—In an emotionally charged press conference Monday, crazed Palestinian gunman Faisal al Hamad expressed frustration over the stereotyping of his people.

[Caption: Faisal al Hamad, seen here shrieking anti-U.S. slogans, says that “not every crazed Palestinian gunman is exactly alike.”]

“As a crazed Palestinian gunman, I feel hurt by the negative portrayal of my people in the media,” said al Hamad, 31, a Hebron-area terrorist maniac. “None of us should have to live with stereotyping and ignorance.”

He then began screaming and firing into a busload of Israeli schoolchildren.

“It hurts that in this supposedly enlightened day and age, people still make assumptions about other people,” al Hamad said. “We should not rely on simple generalizations. Each crazed Palestinian gunman is an individual.”

Al Hamad said that he himself has often been unfairly stereotyped. “Any time I enter a crowded temple with fully loaded AK-47s in both hands, people just assume I’m going to open fire,” he said. “That really hurts.”

“Yes, I sometimes do gun people down in the name of the One True God,” he noted. “But there is so much more to me.”

Read it all.

P.S. If you were following Patterico on the Facebook you would already have read that!

P.P.S. I’m also on the Twitters.

9 Responses to “Classic ’90s-Era Onion: “Crazed Palestinian Gunman Angered By Stereotypes””

  1. “All the different peoples of the world have something special to offer each other,” he said. “Our diversity is our greatest strength. Let’s not make a weakness out of that strength.”

    To emphasize his point, al Hamad fired into a crowd, killing nine.

    I doubt they would write that piece today.

    Patterico (fecd9b)

  2. wish I could at least crack a smile , but after this past weekend …

    seeRpea (ce512c)

  3. This article perfectly represents the enemies of “Stop & Frisk”

    Rodney King's Spirit (ab8c0d)

  4. the events in Chattanooga, and most recently Sydney, seem to evoke the same blindness,

    narciso (ee1f88)

  5. The saddest thing is how clearly this shows how much we have slide backwards in just 18 years. Now days The Onion would be vilified by the left and much of the “right” for spreading fear and hate.

    Mark Johnson (f7ada4)

  6. P.P.S. I’m also on the Twitters.

    Yoda very sorry, twitter I do not do, either!

    Yoda (feee21)

  7. I hope to outlive Facebook.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  8. @7, 8 — Agree. Those are for you young-uns.
    Gramps is facebook-resistant.

    Gramps, the original (bc022b)


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