Patterico's Pontifications

3/17/2015

Coming Soon To Your Local Starbucks: Pretentious Coffee *And* Pretentious Conversations About Race – Just Don’t Ask To Take That Coffee “Black”…

Filed under: General — Dana @ 5:53 pm



[guest post by Dana]

Ugh. This is one of the dumbest things ever. Who really wants to stop at Starbucks on the morning rush to work only to discover that their pretentious cup of coffee now comes with a pretentious discussion of race in America?

Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz announced a new PR campaign for the world’s largest coffee shop chain, in which employees are encouraged to serve up chats about race relations to customers.

“We at Starbucks should be willing to talk about these issues in America,” Schultz said in a corporate release on Monday announcing the “Race Together” campaign.

Starting on Monday, Starbucks baristas are being asked to write “Race Together” on coffee cups they hand to customers, as an invitation to talk to them about race.

CEO Howard Schultz is hopeful this “conversation” will make a difference in racists everywhere:

“We have problems in this country with regard to race and racial inequality and we believe we’re better than this and we believe the country is better than this,”

–Dana

85 Responses to “Coming Soon To Your Local Starbucks: Pretentious Coffee *And* Pretentious Conversations About Race – Just Don’t Ask To Take That Coffee “Black”…”

  1. Hello.

    Dana (86e864)

  2. Just another reason why I don’t go to Starbucks.

    Bill M (906260)

  3. it’s alreadt backfiring on them.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  4. they got sick and tired of complaints from POC PDQ!

    http://ace.mu.nu/archives/355578.php

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  5. My daughter has her answer ready: “The 1,000 meter really annoys me.”

    nk (dbc370)

  6. if this is the alternative to racism god help us

    happyfeet (831175)

  7. if they engage me at the drive-thru window, i shall turn the stereo up, raise my window and rev my engine… which with my car, would piss a lot of people off.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  8. Coffee #000000, please, hold the #FFFFFF.

    htom (4ca1fa)

  9. I am slowly becoming convinced that the racial justice warriors are just as bad as — and perhaps worse than — their racist opponents.

    There is a song about this. (And it’s not ABBA.)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owxRpV7l8Dc

    htom (4ca1fa)

  10. coexist cups
    starving kid photos
    Global Warming trolls
    trustafarian hypocrites
    burnt coffee
    not my kind of place.

    mg (31009b)

  11. I prefer not to pay $5 for a cup of burnt coffee.

    Edoc118 (8b952d)

  12. I am slowly becoming convinced that the racial justice warriors are just as bad as — and perhaps worse than — their racist opponents.

    I’ve found it fascinating that on a few occasions I’ve observed a variety of bigots — true 100%, non-polically-correct-inflated racists — who are far more obsessed about a person’s or group’s racial or religious background than on whether he, she or they are socially-politically liberal, moderate or conservative, or downplaying those aspects of the person or people in question.

    When I think of several well-known liberals/leftists, such as Alec Baldwin or Bill Clinton being caught sputtering vile, 100% bigoted words towards non-whites, I truly snicker at the assumption (or stereotype) that left-leaning sentiments mean a person is less likely to be a racist.

    Folks like Howard Schultz are such intrinsic dim-bulbs about human nature — of their own and and that of others — they really are more likely to be bigots or racists without realizing it. Therefore, I now conclude that such people truly are more vulnerable to being bland, faceless racists, along with all the other negative traits associated with liberalism/liberals.

    Liberalism: 0 and 1, 0 and 2, 0 and 3, 0 and 4, etc. A total flop on the playing field of decency and common sense.

    Mark (c160ec)

  13. So, all those Occupy Wall Street! people who couldn’t get real jobs after college can now put their gender and ethnic grievance studies degrees to use.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  14. 12. I prefer not to pay $5 for a cup of burnt coffee.
    Edoc118 (8b952d) — 3/17/2015 @ 6:47 pm

    Check your white privilege, you cisgendered heteronormative xtofascist oppressor!

    You’ll pay $10 and like it. $5 for the burnt coffee, and the other $5 for the Maoist struggle session.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  15. I stopped by the Starbucks and ordered a grande iced white chocolate mocha. Then repeated my order just to make sure he got it right. And smiled.

    I thought the barista was going to jump over the counter and attack me.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  16. I almost yearn for teh cereal wholesomeness of Postum®… hhhooooaaaaaarrrrkkkkkkkkk!

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  17. That “HOPE” has changed to CHAGRIN.

    People who live in glass bubbles should really get out more.

    Especially if they demand others have a discussion with them
    about things they know nothing of.

    jakee308 (49ccc6)

  18. Steve: “One grande iced white chocolate mocha… hold the chocolate, please.”

    Barista: “really.?!?!?… Okay, one grande iced white chocolate mocha, hold the chocolate… anything else, sh*tbird?”

    Steve: ” yes… I want you to hold the chocolate between yer knees.”

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  19. Will they call me a racist if I order tea?

    DenverTodd (0aaddd)

  20. Mark (c160ec) — 3/17/2015 @ 6:52 pm

    These days it’s difficult to tell the real racists from the faux racists.

    In fact, I would say the real ones are smart enough to take care where they
    speak what they believe.

    The faux racists, not being racists, have no clue what will be considered
    racist by the Eternally Butt Hurt.

    Thus they get the majority of the finger pointing and placards thrust in their
    faces.

    This is what Shultz envisioned; that some self-flagellating caffeine addicts would
    willingly let themselves be berated by a minimum wage counter worker without a
    murmur of protest.

    Little did he realize that the Eternally Butt Hurt have a proprietary attitude about
    any ownership of their butt hurt.

    jakee308 (49ccc6)

  21. i like the ‘coexist’ logo. think it is neat and shows real design ingenuity.

    i suppose this is good news for Tullys and Dunkin Donuts. though perhaps people will just make their own cups of coffee to avoid the “discussion”.

    seeRpea (b6bbec)

  22. Just shut up and hand me my coffee; I don’t need lectures from a young twit.

    Skeptical Voter (12e67d)

  23. I wonder if Schultz really believes his statement, or if he’s just being a smart businessman. Starbucks is already hated by many of the left because it’s a large corporation that puts mom and pop coffee shops out of business. Stumping for racial “equality” just might take some of the edge off that hate.

    norcal (b8f701)

  24. I have zero tolerance for this sort of SJW nonsense, and will turn on my heel and exit any commercial establishment that inflicts it upon me.

    Beldar (fa637a)

  25. Would you have a serious conversation with a hamburger flipper?

    AZ Bob (34bb80)

  26. The faux racists, not being racists, have no clue what will be considered racist by the Eternally Butt Hurt.

    In general, I’m always leery whenever a person who’s judging what’s racist or not is of liberal persuasion, since folks who lean left tend to have a lousy sense of reality, of what’s truly good or bad about themselves, about other humans and situations in general.

    As for a liberal who truly is an out-and-out bigot/racist (eg, Harry Truman who railed against “conservatives” on the campaign trail, liked the idea of publicly-financed healthcare and desegregated the military, but spoke and wrote like a crude Klanner behind closed doors), such a person to me is analogous to a conservative who lacks logic and common sense.

    Mark (c160ec)

  27. I don’t know what kind of Starbucks you guys have on the Wacko Coast, but up here in Chicago, the ones I take my daughter to are staffed by friendly and polite young people. A little bit warmer I’d say than Chik fil A even. I don’t think you’ll get much of a drama unless you make it yourself.

    nk (dbc370)

  28. Howard has officially lost his mind. I admit that I am curious as to how this little chat might be initiated and handled by the barrista. But I do not intend to go there to find out first hand.

    elissa (0525e7)

  29. I want my coffee just like my barista: black and bitter.

    lostingotham (adddc2)

  30. @29– And there is the problem. While the initial exchange might be classic, it is worth supporting such a doofus owner. I don’t think you have to spend the whole Abe Lincoln… a plain old cup o’ joe is about a buck-eighty in the small size, although they call it “tall”.

    Isn’t this the same outfit that wanted their baristas to slow things down so as to prolong the customer’s “experience” in the store, not thinking that many had jobs or appointments to get to and just wanted a cup for the road. I don’t understand how people who think like this guy could run a business this size; maybe work behind the counter, but not run it.

    Gramps, the original (9e1415)

  31. Schultz and his idea are so idiotic, they’re almost a parody, like something one couldn’t have made up even if he tried. The whole episode is worse than a very bad, unfunny skit (as if there is any other type) on Saturday Night Live.

    Moreover, if liberalism were a race (or “race”), that would be the only race that dingleberries like Schultz would give a flying squat about. Even the Twitter snark directed by the apparently black guy who snorts “y’all realize there are no coloured hands in the press photos…” (at the link in Elissa’s post) speaks volumes.

    The story out of Starbucks confirms it: Liberalism truly is a mental illness.

    Mark (c160ec)

  32. This is SOOOOO important. All this opposition to Obama just shows how racist this country really is!

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  33. Q: How would you like that coffee?

    A: African-American.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  34. nk–

    Here in Hollyweird Starbucks are staffed by pretty much the same polite young people, but nicer looking of course.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  35. Can you imagine the reaction to this bat guano at Starbucks’ regional and local meetings, not to mention the staff meetings at each location? I would think that there was a lot of, ah, grumbling.

    Kevin M (25bbee)

  36. re #35: reminds me of a reporter using the term “French African-Americans” when she was reporting from a city in France.

    seeRpea (b6bbec)

  37. Grand Torino I had rented it at the Blockbuster. Returning it late. The counter girl was kind of like the black female police officer in Police Academy, the first one. She asked me how was the movie.

    “Disappointing.” I said, “Don’t get me wrong, the first hundred times I heard the joke about all white guys being the racist, it was like, ‘Ha ha. I get the joke.’ But it’s been thirty years, and Hollywood is still beating me over the head with it. Not so funny anymore.”

    She looked at me like I had grown horns, and was just done snacking on a freshly killed sacrificial goat.
    Never saw her again. Maybe she decided customer service wasn’t her thing.

    Anyhow lets talk race with counter girls. Fully equipped and ready. Looking forward to it.

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  38. “Just Don’t Ask To Take That Coffee “Black”…” – LOL. Reminds me of this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7tDiIwcPao

    Darren (e10d8e)

  39. Guess I’ll get a lecture next time I order the Flat White…

    the bhead (ab64c0)

  40. Starting on Monday, Starbucks baristas are being asked to write “Race Together” on coffee cups they hand to customers, as an invitation to talk to them about race.

    1) Forced “dialog” is neither debate nor discussion.

    2) If I drank coffee, my solution would be to write “Fuck Off” on the cups I stopped buying.

    IGotBupkis, "Si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses." (225d0d)

  41. 28. I don’t know what kind of Starbucks you guys have on the Wacko Coast, but up here in Chicago, the ones I take my daughter to are staffed by friendly and polite young people. A little bit warmer I’d say than Chik fil A even. I don’t think you’ll get much of a drama unless you make it yourself.

    nk (dbc370) — 3/17/2015 @ 8:27 pm

    I wouldn’t say they’re warmer than the people at Chik-fil-A but they’re pretty nice here in north Texas. And I haven’t been to a Starbucks since this idiot Schultz started this idiocy but I can’t imagine the people behind the counter would want to confront people over race relations. Which is what this “conversation” about race would entail.

    “We have problems in this country with regard to race and racial inequality and we believe we’re better than this and we believe the country is better than this,”

    What’s that even supposed to mean? Apparently, they want to either find out if their customers are the kind of good people Schultz thinks he believes we should be, or raise his customers’ consciousness to elevate them to the moral plane he inhabits where “we believe we’re better than this.”

    Insulting your customers is a really crappy business strategy, generally speaking. It works for Arrogant Bastard Ale…

    This is an aggressive ale. You probably won’t like it. It is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to be able to appreciate an ale of this quality and depth. We would suggest that you stick to safer and more familiar territory…

    …but then Arrogant Bastard Ale doesn’t attack its customers on their moral failings on an issue totally unrelated to appreciating a beer.

    Just give me the coffee, dammit. Hold the moralizing and judgementalism.

    Better yet, there are a ton of places that brew better and/or cheaper coffee. I can fill my gargantuan travel mug at Racetrack without the lecture and for less dinero.

    After 20 years in the Navy all you care about is if the coffee works. The fact that the pot has been left on over the weekend and you can tar a roof with it is just an added plus.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  42. this whole deal is very embarrassing and very sad for the shareholders of starbucks

    but I think it’s neat cause it undercuts the credibility of starbucks and the dippy ceo guy and undermines any further social justice nonsense from them going forward and serves as a warning to other companies what might want to do similarly silly things

    starbucks is a joke anymore, to put it simply

    happyfeet (831175)

  43. To Coffee Bean!

    Harcourt Fenton Mudd (5e0a82)

  44. I don’t do Starbucks ’cause tounge rings make me retch.

    DNF (946592)

  45. Tongue, wretch, whatever.

    DNF (946592)

  46. Would you have a serious conversation with a hamburger flipper?

    If he and I wanted to trade ideas on a subject, sure. I’d far rather talk with a burger flipper than some menopausal padded shoulders militant with a hyphenated name and a law degree.

    The Friendly Grizzly (c59e80)

  47. I don’t like SPAM!!!

    Icy (b003af)

  48. maybe when people makes their mandatory electoral vote the polling officials can talk nicely with them about how race issues are coming along.

    seeRpea (b6bbec)

  49. I don’t like SPAM!!!

    Icy (b003af)

    Yeah, for me I don’t much care that Starbucks is liberal. I care that I’m just trying to go about my business without that kind of interruption. Free speech is good, but so is a peaceful trip to the coffee shop so I can enjoy myself, and I don’t want that time interrupted for some aristocrat’s sense of righteousness.

    Dustin (2a8be7)

  50. As always, Monty Python was decades ahead of the curve on this one:
    the-conversation-menu-from-the-meaning-of-life-1983
    WAITER: “Good evening! Would you care for something to talk about? Our special tonight is minorities.”

    Icy (b003af)

  51. meanwhile in the real world outside of Starbuck’s bubble,
    Islamic Terrorists kill over 20 visiting tourists in Tunisia,
    a major battle erupts in Frankfurt between police and protestors concerning EU,
    and in Schultz’s own Seattle workers are getting laid off or reduced hours due to min wage raise.

    seeRpea (b6bbec)

  52. Maybe that’s the reason for Schultz thing. He needs a new line in the sand to weed out baristas. Since one coffee despensor is much like another, how’s a coffee baron to tell which 47 % of his workforce stays and which 53% gets let go?

    Hey! Let’s have a racial test. The easy way to discriminate!

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  53. If your craving diversity – stand in line at a dunkin donuts.

    mg (31009b)

  54. their food is garbage is the problem

    i like their hot chockit though

    happyfeet (831175)

  55. me too.

    mg (31009b)

  56. I buy their Starbuck’s coffee by the pound and grind/brew my own at home. If I’m heading into my office (on the one day a month I do that) I’ll grab a cup in the drive-thru and then hit the road. No time for chats (racial or otherwise) other than exchanging pleasantries with their baristas, who I’ve found are very pleasant folk.

    I like their coffee, because it’s chock full of caffeine and tastes pretty good.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  57. Sorry Colonel but I had their coffee only once and that was when a metrosexual business associate forced me to meet him there. As I recall it took three shots of Knob Creek to get the taste out of my mouth. Starbucks is for sissy’s.

    Hoagie (58a3ec)

  58. Oh, and anyone who would pay $6 for a damn cup of coffee needs their head examined. Sounds like some government make-work program or redistribution plot. $6 for coffee. Hell.

    Hoagie (58a3ec)

  59. I think Americans need to have a discussion but not about white privilege. We need to have a discussion about white guilt and why it led us to elect Obama in the first place … and then re-elect him despite his incompetence and lies.

    DRJ (e80d46)

  60. That’s like bottled water. $1.50 for 16oz. of what comes out of the tap for (almost) free. That’s $12 a gallon and the same freaks that complain about the price of gas at $3.70 buy bottled water by the case. And how much more effort does it take to discover, drill, refine, ship and distribute that gallon of gas than running water through a filter? Starbucks and bottled water are both the result of great capitalist ideas to suck the cash out of idiot liberals. Don’t be a liberal, drink bourbon and Folgers.

    Hoagie (58a3ec)

  61. That’s just the problem, DRJ. One can’t have a conversation with somebody who only wants a monologue. It’s like this: the poor oppressed blacks and their enabling leftist white sponsors talk and we listen. Any effort toward reason is met with “Racist!”.

    Hoagie (58a3ec)

  62. The few times I’ve been to Starbucks, the baristas were very busy, and there’s usually a waiting line. Where are the workers supposed to find the time for #RaceLecture? And what makes Schultz so sure that the workers are all competent lecturers, and conform to the PC race narrative?

    gp (5a38d9)

  63. Col- as one who has roasted green beans for a decade, starbucks burns their coffee on purpose. Most people put sugar and a white dairy product in their coffee to make it palatable. Enjoy.
    I drink it black. I’ll take my sweets in a pastry or three.

    mg (31009b)

  64. We need to have a discussion about white guilt and why it led us to elect Obama in the first place …

    DRJ, I almost wish that Obama were supported by whites mainly due to (or only due to) so-called white guilt. But if Obama were a staunch conservative, a dyed-in-the-wool Republican, I have a suspicion that far too many of those same Americans would have shrugged off such a candidacy and looked elsewhere for a president.

    In the 21st century, we have a problem not of race but of the lunacy and stupidity of modern-day liberalism.

    Mark (c160ec)

  65. It’s all about the caffeine, Hoagie, and I drink mine black too, mg. I like their Komodo Dragon blend and some of their seasonal stuff. I always get two shots of espresso added. I’m sure there’s better coffee out there, I just haven’t looked for it.

    Y’all probably drink that blend from those beans reclaimed from civet cat crap, Hoagie, thinkin’ it puts some lead in your pencil.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  66. a friend of mine just got some weasel poop coffee from vietnam he hasn’t tried it yet though

    happyfeet (831175)

  67. he says it’s probably the fake kind where they use enzymes that mimic the magic of the weasel bowels, but that it’s still supposed to be tasty and distinctive

    happyfeet (831175)

  68. Weasel poop has a magic all its own.

    Give generously to my weasel poop campaign.

    weaselpoop@clintonemail.com

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  69. I have a picture of all these Malaysians gathering up civet poop and laughing their butts off: “Americans boil this and drink it!” Then, they collapse with hyperventilation and aching ribs and can’t work for an hour. And then it happens again.

    nk (dbc370)

  70. It’s a little like those Oriental marital aids that some enterprising Chinamen market as weapons complete with intruction manuals and videos.

    nk (dbc370)

  71. I have a picture of all these Malaysians gathering up civet poop…

    In my last dream I was still stuck at the Tampa airport saying, “How can it possibly cost $5k to fly to Dallas.”

    Then I woke up.

    And fought the civet poop.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  72. nk, could you enlighten us on the “Oriental marital aids” that “enterprising Chinamen market as weapons.”

    Curious minds want to know.

    Steve57 (88b05c)

  73. think I’ll switch to POSTUM® for a few days…

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  74. wow… I hereby declare a chubwa on Dana Perino!

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  75. I think the ultimate would be to have civet cats kept in pens and force-fed coffee beans… no?

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  76. I just remembered I have an old Rudy Ray Moore LP I recorded on a CD… I could have that bad boy turned up at a high volume as I wait in the drive-thru line. just doing my part to further the discussion along.

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  77. oh, yeahhhhhh… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Voxp3ckwJZ0&sns=em

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)

  78. Kubotans. Don’t make me link the Wu Shu video with the eunuch and his three concubines, or the Hanzo the Razor video with the samurai lady.

    nk (dbc370)

  79. Many good coffee bean companies, try Peets.

    mg (31009b)

  80. Guatemalans are growing some very good beans lately, as are the Nicaraguans.

    mg (31009b)

  81. don’t like Major Dickhead’s coffee from Peet’s, mg. gotta have teh caffeine. guatemala… maybe, but no COMMIE coffee for me!

    Colonel Haiku (2601c0)


Powered by WordPress.

Page loaded in: 0.5718 secs.