Patterico's Pontifications

11/28/2013

Fun Videos for Your Post-Turkey Internet Browsing

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 5:25 pm

I haven’t had my dinner yet, but the way the Internet and time zones work, most of you probably have. If you’re here looking for some mindless entertainment, you have come to the right place. Speaking of regional differences, here is a fun little video on regional expressions:

Thanks to Lou P. for this.

I match up with pretty much every expression or pronunciation that is native to North Texas, which is, I guess, no surprise — since (as regular readers know) I grew up in Fort Worth, Texas. Probably the major area where I depart from North Texas-ese is calling a fast-moving road with no stoplights a “freeway” rather than a “highway.” I confess that I’ve become California-ized on that narrow expression.

But really: is “puh-CAHN” as the (proper) pronunciation of the word “pecan” really so narrowly limited to North Texas and a small handful of maybe six states to the north and east of Texas? Seriously? Do the rest of you pronounce that word in some other (stupid) way? More to the point, and a greater cause for concern, do other Texans (such as West Texans) pronounce that word incorrectly?

Please advise.

Second goofy video: the explanation for why your neighbor would rather earn $10,000 less if he could prevent you from being a millionaire. It turns out that the base emotion of envy does not just cause humans to act in an irrational fashion; monkeys have the same ethos:

Obama just wants to spread the grapes around, folks!

69 Responses to “Fun Videos for Your Post-Turkey Internet Browsing”

  1. Ding.

    Patterico (d87e46)

  2. Monkeys == Occupy Wall Street is the obvious comparison.

    SPQR (768505)

  3. Heh.

    Patterico (d87e46)

  4. Here in the Deep South, PEE-can is the correct pronunciation.

    Also: the overwhelming majority of whites in this neck of the woods say Coke, but many blacks say soda. They must be transplants.

    Whitey Nisson (aa99c0)

  5. The monkeys are females, at least the one on the left is? “You gave her the grapes, you can get your rocks from her. And you know where you can put your cucumber.”

    nk (dbc370)

  6. I grew up hearing pee-CAHN in east Texas and Louisiana, but later in Carolina, Michigan and Tenessee, I heard PEE-can mostly.

    Jim (875033)

  7. Am I the only one that noticed that the other monkey immediately ate her grape, and made no attempt to share?

    Could one make the assumption that greed was natural/instinctive? Don’t we implicitly assume this is true when we are surprised by instances of altrusim…and go to great lengths to figure out a reason why the act wasn’t altrustic in the first place?

    gahrie (a05ed4)

  8. Also anyone notice it was the “government” (as much as test monkeys have government) who was rewarding the monkeys differently for doing the same job..maybe we should call the monkey getting grapes Solyndra?

    gahrie (a05ed4)

  9. I’m in West Texas and everyone I know says puh-cahn.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  10. DRJ,

    Thank goodness. I was hoping you would say that.

    Patterico (d87e46)

  11. Pee-cahn pie is supposed to be great. I never understood that.

    JD (ea1128)

  12. Also, I think most West Texans refer to multi-lane roads with overpasses as freeways when they are in a city and as highways when they are between cities, e.g., LBJ Freeway is in Dallas but IH-20 connects West Texas to DFW.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  13. Thanksgiving isn’t Thanksgiving without pecan pie, JD. It’s the perfect finish to turkey and cornbread dressing, and much better than pumpkin pie. The real question is whether you call it stuffing or dressing, and whether you make it with white bread or cornbread.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  14. I call it stuffing when it’s cooked in the turkey and dressing when it’s cooked separately, and I never ever use anything but cornbread.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  15. What do you call the freeway when you enter Carmel?

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  16. Stuffing in turkey. Dressing with cornbread out of turkey.

    Pumpkin pie with Cool Whip is my undoing every year.

    Smoked a turkey and a pork butt this year. I got skillz.

    JD (ea1128)

  17. Growing up in Southeastern Colorado I always heard it as PUH-cahn.

    JVW (709bc7)

  18. I call all highways highways. I don’t think I have ever called a road a freeway. There are a few that I call turnpikes, because I was introduced to said roads as a child.

    JD (ea1128)

  19. Patterico, what do you call the freeway that is south of Paschal High School and north of Southwest High School? Is it “I-20″ or “the 20″ to you?

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  20. There is only one way to say pecan. It does not rhyme with p or can in either syllable. And believe me, my East Texas credentials are bonafide.

    Stuffing in the bird, dressing outside.

    The pavement leading outside of town is the road. As in, “Take the road to Crockett, then go up the next road to Elkhart.” Interim roads are “the dirt road” or “just follow that trail,” and sometimes “look for the asphalt road on the left.”

    The road between Houston and Dallas is the freeway.

    If you on the freeway to Carmel, you are lost because there ain’t no Carmel in Texas.

    And the food of God is black-eyed peas and cornbread.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  21. And I’ve never really thought about it, but I think I’d agree with DRJ’s distinction between “freeway” and “highway.” (I grew up in Freeport but have lived in Fort Worth since 1985.) Maybe that’s because lots of the freeways have “Freeway” as part of their formal names, e.g. North Freeway and South Freeway (I-35W) and West Freeway (I-30 west of downtown.) Curiously, there’s no name that I know of for I-30 between downtown and Arlington, where it becomes the Tom Landry Freeway.

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  22. There are toll roads in Texas, but they are all named after Sam Rayburn, H.W. and some guy named Loop.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  23. I always thought the rule was that a freeway had no stoplights or cross-traffic, but a highway in some cases could. Highway 1 in California is everywhere a highway, but in some stretches a freeway too. You will see signs along the road designating “Begin Freeway” and “End Freeway.”

    JVW (709bc7)

  24. Ag80, over here, we’re about to add the Chisholm Trail to your list. A new toll road (called a parkway for some reason) between downtown and Cleburne is under construction. I think it’s an extension of Texas 121; the first stretch is supposed to open in the spring.

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  25. My knowledge of freeways is primarily from traveling to the big Texas cities but I always thought the term freeway came about to distinguish a free city highway from pay highways like toll roads and turnpikes. But I don’t really know.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  26. Ag80,

    We have that Loop guy in West Texas, too. He really got around.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  27. Diffus, but 121 is Sam Rayburn. However, Fort Worth is special and it gets to do things differently.

    The only significant highway in Texas is the one that runs both ways through College Station.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  28. JVW, I believe the formal definition of a freeway would involve high-velocity traffic moving unimpeded over medium to long distances at no cost to the driver (hence the “free” part, as opposed to a toll road).

    But outside of the Dallas-Fort Worth Turnpike, which closed its toll booths sometime in the 70s,m I believe, and the Dallas North Tollway, toll roads were a relatively unknown species in Texas until maybe 15 or 20 years ago. So you’ll understand why we’ve become accustomed to referring to any decent-sized stretch of road accommodating fast-moving vehicles as a “freeway.”

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  29. I like Fort Worth. And Paschal.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  30. Maybe 121 is called Sam Rayburn up where you are; over here, we call it 121, or Airport Freeway. After it goes past Coppell, we don’t really care anymore. Call it what you want.

    Wasn’t there a dispute at one time between those who wanted the highway to be bidirectional and those who insisted on the more traditional unidirectional orientation? 😉

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  31. Oh, yeah, don’t forget Beltway in your list of toll-road honorees.

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  32. puh-cahn, sub sandwich, pop, rowt (rhymes with out), expressway, sneakers, casket.

    elissa (4738eb)

  33. Back in the day, all roads in Texas were free with Stuckey’s to boot.

    Now, some cost money. I have always suspected creeping socialism.

    On the plus side is we now have Bucee’s, being an Ag and all.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  34. Mr. Buc-ee and I went to different high schools together. He’s recently opened one at US 290 and FM 362 in Waller. I’ve seen smaller Walmarts. Wanna see my beaver pictures?

    Whatever happened to Stuckey’s?

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  35. My brother lives in Saginaw (Texas)and I can’t understand half of what he says.

    Regardless, Diffus, even over here we call 121 the road to the airport. Truth be told, no one calls it Sam Rayburn except the radio traffic people.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  36. I don’t want to see your pictures, but Buc-ees (is that the proper nomenclature?) is opening in Terrell soon.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  37. Grew up in East Texas (Beaumont). We had 16 acres of puh-cawn trees. Never heard it pronounced any other way until I moved north and east and heard all of those other mispronunciations.

    Cecil (28a0dd)

  38. Buc-ee’s. I dunno why. Mr. Buc-ee went to Brazoswood HS, whose mascot is the Buccaneers; maybe that has something to do with it. (“Today, Lake Jackson; tomorrow, the world!”, maybe?) The one at 362 and 290 is the last one between Houston and Fort Worth. The furthest north I’ve heard of one is, I believe, Madisonville, but I haven’t driven I-45 in years. Terrell would be the first in North Texas, AFAIK.

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  39. Smoked a turkey and a pork butt this year. I got skillz.

    Comment by JD (ea1128) — 11/28/2013 @ 7:45 pm

    Must have lotsa skills! Hard to hold while lighting and puffing on I bet!

    Anyone ever h’ar of Sulphur Bluff, that’s where this Jedi Master grew up!

    Yoda (c1890a)

  40. Yoda was gonna ask what end you puffed on, but that question is moot with “pork butt” it is!

    Teheeheeheee! 😆

    Yoda (c1890a)

  41. Patterico, what do you call the freeway that is south of Paschal High School and north of Southwest High School? Is it “I-20″ or “the 20″ to you?

    Comment by Diffus (4a5ca6) — 11/28/2013 @ 7:54 pm

    20.

    I-20 if you’re being all formal for some reason.

    Patterico (d87e46)

  42. And I don’t know that I would have ever called 20 a “freeway.” Maybe. I can’t remember. We would tend to refer to the roads by their numbers and not use a general term.

    All freeways in California are preceded by “the.” In Texas that would sound stupid. You take 20 to Spur 408 to 30 to 35 to Central, for example. “The” doesn’t enter into it.

    Patterico (d87e46)

  43. As another west Texan (a bit further up in the panhandle), I ditto DRJ’s comment(#9 — 11/28/2013 @ 6:43 pm): puh-CAHN.

    I never heard of “freeways” until I visited Houston or Dallas or Austin as a teen, and then only heard the term applied to interstate or comparable roads without traffic lights (i.e., with on- and off-ramps, over- and underpasses, etc.) Even major roads like U.S. 87 (which passed through my hometown, Lamesa, en route from Lubbock to Big Spring) were “highways,” not “freeways.”

    Beldar (8ff56a)

  44. And regarding Buc-ees, this article is worth a look — and as the article says, Buc-ees has restrooms that “You Have to Pee to Believe.”

    Beldar (8ff56a)

  45. Oh — and my favorite nickname for an interstate was I-35 in Austin, which at least when I was a UT student was still called “the Interregional.”

    Beldar (8ff56a)

  46. Sorry for the “string comments” — I ought to have consolidated these into one, longer comment — but:

    My new favorite freeway nickname is what I often hear fellow Houstonians call Texas State Highway Beltway 8: The part that’s free is the “Sam Houston Parkway,” the part that’s a toll-road is the “Sam Houston Tollway,” but together they’re colloquially referred to just as “the Sam,” as in “He lives about a half-mile west of the Sam” out in [New] Katy.”

    Beldar (8ff56a)

  47. Now what is silly are “Interstate” highways that don’t leave a state. In Denver there is “I-270″ that is barely 10 miles long and never leaves Colorado … heck, it barely crosses a county line.

    SPQR (768505)

  48. Interstate is used for the segment of a freeway that runs by a city, whereas freeway is used for the loop through town.

    I-80 and Capital City Freeway are my one example.

    It might be a California thing.

    papertiger (c2d6da)

  49. @23– those “end freeway” and “begin freeway” usually correspond with an intersection that does not meet the standards of the national highway folk. They end the freeway, have a non-compliant intersection and then start it again.

    As to that short stretch of I-270, (@47) it probably hooks up with I-70 someplace around there. In the SF bay area, I-80 is the dominant interstate, and the various feeders are labelled I-580, I-280, I-880, etc as they connect in some manner with the main highway, I-80.

    Pat, I disagree on the prefix “the” in CA. I think it is a soCal term, as in “The 10″. Never heard it used up this way. Just 80, 280, etc for the interstates, and “SR” as prefix for the numbered state routes… at least on reports.

    gramps, the original (c9132b)

  50. i’m just so goddamn thankful i can’t even tell you even though technically it’s after midnight and thanky thanky day is over already

    i’m a go see if there’s any pita chips left

    happyfeet (8ce051)

  51. as a native here, in Lost Angels, they are freeways.

    we should know. we invented/perfected them.

    just ask the Panther. 😎

    http://articles.latimes.com/1998/mar/12/local/me-28172

    redc1c4 (abd49e)

  52. i’m not a native here by any stretch

    the freeways here are weird cause these wackadoodles have no idea what an access road is

    in real america everyone understands this concept

    but not here

    *shrug*

    not my problem really

    happyfeet (8ce051)

  53. $1 Taco Tuesdays @ Manzanos…

    redc1c4 (abd49e)

  54. that’s value!

    happyfeet (8ce051)

  55. Interesting….here in New Jersey, we have so much traffic and so little regard for speed limits and turn signals that most roads are becoming highways. But we are very creative in naming our roads: we have a parkway (Garden State Parkway that connects NYC to the Shore, the Turnpike (which exit?), the Expressway, which connects Atlantic City to Philly via the North South Freeway (which actually runs East-West), 295 (never I295), two Pikes – the Black Horse and the White Horse, which are confusing because they run parallel and both start in the same place to connect Philly to Atlantic City.

    Pine Baroness (a1d9be)

  56. Around the mouth of the Chesapeake Bay and well down into coastal North Carolina it’s P-Can, same rule of pro-nouncement as C-Ment and A-Rab. And, around Thanksgiving we look forward to Punk-in Pie for D-Zert.

    ropelight (bd3c06)

  57. SPQR, there’s an interstate highway on Oahu.

    Beldar, I miss your blog.

    And I went into the restroom at the Buc-ee’s at 290 and 362 last weekend. It was pretty awesome. I haven’t hit your link yet but the story I heard is that Buc-ee’s was started after the owner’s mother complained that she could never find a clean restroom when she stopped on the highway. So he set out to have a place with a restroom his mother would be proud of.

    Diffus (4a5ca6)

  58. Am I the only one that noticed that the other monkey immediately ate her grape, and made no attempt to share?

    Could one make the assumption that greed was natural/instinctive? Don’t we implicitly assume this is true when we are surprised by instances of altrusim…and go to great lengths to figure out a reason why the act wasn’t altrustic in the first place?

    Comment by gahrie (a05ed4) — 11/28/2013 @ 6:13 pm

    Using animal “research” to try to say something about human behavior is even more ridiculous than shrimp on treadmills. They’re just torturing the animals for no point. Well, at least they’re not designing “enhanced interrogation” protocols for Gitmo. And as long they’re using private grants for their foolishness and not taxpayer money … considering that otherwise they’d be bussing tables at McDonald’s.

    You can find a thousand human examples of this behavior just by going out and about with people. Do you remember when Paris Hilton had to spend time in jail, and all the hookers, female shoplifters, and female drug dealers, also serving time in LA County, complained about the special treatment she was getting?

    And there’s the Obamacare shill, Zachariah Emanuel?, and his “the winnners of the genetic lottery” (meaning healthy people) should pay for the health care of the “losers” (the chronically sick), just recently.

    But it is a funny video. It reminded me of the Koran’s admonition that a man may have more than one wife but he must treat them all equally. It’s not just a commandment, it’s good advice. Its disregard will not await Judgment Day for the punishment — the man will see hell on earth real fast in the here and now. 😉

    nk (dbc370)

  59. Ag80,

    A story about Aggie Christmas wishes, with video.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  60. Today, the Obamas visited the immigration activists who are fasting on the National Mall. I wonder if they took them any leftovers from their 9 Thanksgiving pies?

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  61. nice…

    remember when we had a President who would visit the troops @ war on the holidays, instead of sucking up to criminals?

    redc1c4 (abd49e)

  62. Here’s a weird video of ice spinning in a ND river.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  63. Here’s one for Ag80:

    Two recent graduates of Texas A&M decided to start a chicken farm. They order 500 chicks and plant them feet first in the ground with only the heads above ground. Within a week all of the chicks are dead. One Aggie says to the other, “We must be doing something wrong.”

    So they order 500 more chicks and this time they plant them head first with only the feet above ground. Well, within minutes, all of the chicks have died. One Aggie says, “We still must be doing something wrong! Let’s write A&M and describe what we are doing, and they will be able to tell us where we are going wrong!”

    They write the letter and send it to Texas A&M, and finally after two weeks they get the following reply.

    Dear Sir:

    We have considered what you advised in your letter. Please send soil samples!

    Yoda (c1890a)

  64. Ha ha, yoda. That is so funny.

    You have to plant the eggs, not the chicks. That’s why soil samples are important.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  65. Just to lighten up your day a little more, here’s another old one for you.

    What do you call an Aggie after 5 years?












    BOSS!

    Yoda (c1890a)

  66. So, an Aggie walks into a drug store. He asks the pharmacist for condoms. The druggist says: “That will be $1.98, $2 with tax.”

    So the Aggie says, “Tacks? I thought you just rolled them on.”

    Then the druggist says, “Just kidding, Obamacare makes them free.”

    Then everybody laughs until they cry. Except they can’t stop crying.

    So much for Aggie jokes.

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)

  67. Two Aggies arrive in Dallas by bus on vacation, and after bus fare have only 5 dollars left. One says, “Here we are in Big D, and only have 5 dollars to spend. How are we going to afford to do anything on that?”

    The other Aggie looks around and sees a drugstore, grabs the 5 dollars, runs into the store, and comes back out a few minutes later with something in a brown paper sack. He hands it to the other Aggie who opens the sack and pulls out a box of Tampax Tampons. He looks at them quizzically, and then asks, “Just what are we supposed to do with these?”

    The first Aggie responds, “Well, it says on the side of the box that you can go horseback riding, swimming, bicycle riding……….”

    Yoda (c1890a)

  68. An Aggie and a t-sip are taking a leak in a men’s room.

    When they finish, the t-sip says: “At Texas, they teach us to wash after using the restroom.”

    The Aggie says: “At A&M, they teach us not to piss on our hands.”

    Then, they try to sign up for insurance on healthcare.gov and it doesn’t work.

    So, the t-sip says: “At Texas, they taught us how to build a simple Web site.”

    And the Aggie says: “Yeah, at A&M, they taught us that, too.”

    Ag80 (eb6ffa)


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