The payoff is the last paragraph, but somehow it seems funnier to read it all in context, alongside the more serious entries.
October 23, 2013
Campus Watch: Below is a summary of campus activity reported to or observed by the University Police Department between Friday, 10/18/13 and Wednesday, 10/23/13.
GREGORY GYM, 2101 SPEEDWAY STREET
Theft: A UT Student reported his iPhone 5 as stolen from the Gregory Gym basketball court area. Estimated Loss Value: $400.00 Occurred on: 10/22/13, at 8:00 PM.
JESTER WEST, 201 EAST 21ST STREET
Theft: A Non-UT subject reported his black Galaxy S4 phone as stolen from the Jester Academic area. Estimated Loss Value: $300.00 Occurred on: 10/20/13, at 6:59 PM.
Assault, Criminal Trespass: A Non-UT male subject was seen yelling at a Non-UT female subject in the 2000 block of Speedway. The male subject struck the female subject causing her to fall to the ground before fleeing the area. A UT Police Officer responded to the area and arrested the subject for Assault and Criminal Trespass. The subject was transported to Central Booking and was released to TCSO personnel. Occurred on: 10/20/13, at 1:10 PM.
2400 TRINITY STREET
Graffiti, Criminal Mischief: A UT Student reported seeing Texas A&M themed markings made in white spray paint on the tiger statue near the Texas Memorial Museum. Additional markings were found around the Doty Fine Arts, Thompson Conference Center, LBJ Library and Performing Arts Center areas. All of the additional markings were made in maroon and white spray paint. Coincidentally the Texas A&M football team had a devastating loss to the Auburn Tigers earlier the same day. Unlike the Texas A&M loss, these blemishes found on campus can and will be removed as soon as possible. Estimated Removal Cost: $525.00 Occurred on: 10/20/13, at 4:49 AM.
Hook ’em Horns!
Thanks to a tipster.