Patterico's Pontifications


Sockpuppet Friday (Alec Baldwin cogintive dissonance edition)

Filed under: General — Karl @ 10:55 am

[Posted by Karl]

As usual, you are positively encouraged to engage in sockpuppetry in this thread. The usual rules apply.

Please, be sure to switch back to your regular handle when commenting on other threads. I have made that mistake myself.

Sockpuppet comments about the Republican primary race are strictly prohibited. If you wish to use sockpuppets for that purpose, confine your comments to this thread. Same goes for any discussion that is not funny where people want to get angry at each other. Offending comments will be summarily deleted and the violators flogged.

And remember: the worst sin you can commit on this thread is not being funny.

Film Actors’ Guild president Alec Baldwin has never been accused of being the sharpest tool in the drawer.  On Victims of Communism Day, Baldwin told MSNBC’s Lawrence O’Donnell of Republicans’ political woes:

Well, you know, things for these guys aren’t going that well. You know the, the economy may stumble. It probably won’t stumble that badly between now and the election. For those people who look at these very handy benchmarks like the Dow, the Dow is still staying pretty well above 13,000. Which that kind of crowd of Romney’s really, really goes for. ***

And here’s Alec talking to GQ in a new interview:

GQ: Yesterday you were speaking about how Mitt Romney is out of touch with the American people. If getting pizza with firemen isn’t the right way to remedy that, what’s a more appropriate food to show that you’re down with regular people?

Alec Baldwin: I think right now, and I know this is a very glib thing to say, but I think right now it would be to take a book full of food stamps and go buy whatever meals you can with a food stamp provision on a weekly basis. Because although welfare has been cut, as we all know from a lot of reportage over the last several months that food stamp use has soared. I think the most American thing you can do today is go stand in line and see what your weekly allotment of food stamps will buy you.

He thinks he’s being cute, but when Alec Baldwin joins Newt Gingrich in calling Barack Obama the “food stamp president,” he may want to rethink the notion that the GOP is running scared.



  1. Ding!

    Comment by Karl (6ac03c) — 5/4/2012 @ 10:55 am

  2. (BTW – one good reason to “Ding!” is to test that your post has inexplicably turned off comments.)

    Comment by Karl (6ac03c) — 5/4/2012 @ 10:56 am

  3. Let me just paraphrase one of my earlier comments. That actor Alec Baldwin, like a lot his fellow actors, is no good, lying bastard. He can lie out of both sides of his mouth at the same time, and if he ever caught himself telling the truth, he’d lie just to keep his hand in. And, fellas, you can quote me on this one!

    Comment by Harry S. Truman (6451eb) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:01 am

  4. since the tanning bed post is broken, i’ll post this warning here:

    Welding goggles should be donned prior to pushing the “play” button…. 8)

    just sayin’

    Comment by redc1c4 (403dff) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:01 am

  5. Sorry, fellas. I do like to speak plainly, but I do like to speak correctly. Baldwin is a no good, lying bastard. Now, I’d better get going as Bess is expecting me to sit down for lunch.

    Comment by Harry S. Truman (255b30) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:05 am

  6. I thought food stamps were a monthly thing did this change?

    Comment by happyfeet (a55ba0) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:11 am

  7. So, photos of Alec Baldwin should have the label “FAG” appear below his name?

    Comment by Team America (4ae072) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:15 am

  8. Oh yeah, we already did that.

    Comment by Team America (4ae072) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:25 am

  9. Alec Baldwin is heap good actor, with high cheekbones like brave.

    Comment by Lizzy "Sitting Bulls@#t" Warren (b5a1cf) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:37 am

  10. “Hey kids, keep in mind that it was an actor who murdered Abraham Lincoln !”

    Comment by Former California Governor Pat Brown, when campaigning against Ronald Reagan (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:39 am

  11. I think the most American thing you can do today is go stand in line and see what your weekly allotment of food stamps will buy you.

    That right there out to be a Mitt Romney 2012 commercial. End stop.

    Comment by Dustin (330eed) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:45 am

  12. *ought

    Comment by Dustin (330eed) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:45 am

  13. “I can confirm that Ms. Warren is definintely 1/32nd Native American, definitely 1/4th Anti-American, and absolutely 1/2 Crazy !”

    Comment by Geneologist confirming bloodlines of Elizabeth Warren (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:45 am

  14. You are not helping, Alec.

    Comment by Kim (330eed) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:46 am

  15. “No, Daddy, YOU are the pig !”

    Comment by Ireland Baldwin, daughter of Alec Baldwin who was called a 'pig' by her father in a taped voicemail (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:52 am

  16. Uh, I can see Russia from my house!

    /got nothing

    Comment by Tina Fey (7c3d5b) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:01 pm

  17. Comment by happyfeet — 5/4/2012 @ 11:11 am

    I thought food stamps were a monthly thing did this change?

    That’s not the problem – Alec Baldwin is assuming a person buys only one week’s worth of groceries at a time – no more and no less.

    The problem is I think there are no more food stamp books! There’s now an EBT card — a debit card that can carry both cash (welfare) and food stamps.

    Comment by Sammy Finkelman (6ae430) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:03 pm

  18. It is safe to say that Alec Baldwin isn’t living on food stamps.

    Comment by Kevin M (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:10 pm

  19. While checking out the lower price grocery stores to see what a person on food stamps can buy I found this wonder thing called “London Broil”. I bought some and had my chef prepare it, and it almost tastes like steak, at a fraction of the cost of cheap steak like wegu. It does taste so much like steak that I am sure people on food stamps are eating it instead of steak. Whatever it is made of is certainly unhealthy and killing them. We have to something to prevent corporations from selling this type of fake food to people on food stamps.

    Comment by alec "it's not a girdle" baldwin (131bc0) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:18 pm

  20. I think I could umpire as well as this.

    Comment by Barack Hussein Obama (cc0aaa) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:23 pm

  21. My composite wife whose name is Julia Michelle wants to know if we can purchase arugula with these food stamps.

    Comment by Barry (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:44 pm

  22. It sure is tough going through life with my head permanently stuck to one side and feet forever akimbo, but at least my contraception is FREE!

    Comment by Julia, pastel-hued beneficiary of Barack the Magnificent's beneficence (325a59) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:48 pm

  23. FAG President.

    I see what you did there.

    And I LOVE it.

    Comment by Space Cockroach (8096f2) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:52 pm

  24. “Uncle Sam Barack, I need twenty bucks to go to the movies with my friends. Also, can you pay for my renewal of my subscription to People magazine ? They’re doing a cover story about a blind Chinese man who got beat up by the Chinese Government ! Also, I need to go to the nail salon on Saturday, can you leave me a blank check that I can take with me ?”

    Comment by Julia (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 12:52 pm

  25. And, I almost forgot, no eyes or mouth, but who cares? I get FREE ABORTIONS!!!

    Comment by Julia, slave to the welfare state (325a59) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:02 pm

  26. “President Obama, where can I get some of those cool Mom jeans that you famously wore when you bounced threw out the first pitch like a helpless girl like Roger Clemens ? By the way, can you buy me a pair ?”

    Comment by Julia (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:31 pm

  27. I get food stamps, too?!!? Damn, baby, no gas, no mortgage and now no food bill? I am just so thrilled!!! He’s the best president EVER!!!!

    Comment by Peggy Joseph (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:32 pm

  28. He has to get himself a pair first.

    Comment by Kevin M (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:33 pm

  29. No sock: R.I.P. Adam “MCA” Yauch of The Beastie Boys

    Comment by Icy (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:34 pm

  30. Ireland, the Republicans are all lying, money-grubbing whores . . . just like your mommy.

    Comment by Alec "el presidente de FAG" Baldwin (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:37 pm

  31. Yeah, I know that I look like Suze Orman covered in s*it. What about it?

    Comment by Tanning Mom (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:40 pm

  32. So, no eyes or mouth, but she needs free abortions. She obviously isn’t totally “hole”less.

    Comment by concerned citizen paying for Julia's freebies (e7a709) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:52 pm

  33. Hulk crush Alec Baldwin like a puny insect!!!

    Comment by Hulk (6451eb) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:52 pm

  34. They’ll turn us all into beggars ’cause they’re easier to please…

    Comment by Another Anon (f43943) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:52 pm

  35. I see I am not part of BuhRock’s composite girlfriends. Right now, I am some angry black woman.

    Comment by Meechelle R. Obama (e7a709) — 5/4/2012 @ 1:53 pm

  36. Dadeee! Those letters to your girlfriends were soo lame. How could you? Eew.

    Comment by Malia Obama (0dbe1e) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:15 pm

  37. Granny Warren has run into a pache of bad luck.

    Comment by Uncle Sam (44de53) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:17 pm

  38. But, but . . . exploiting racial minorities is what we Democrats DO! And now you all wanna act surprised about it?

    Comment by Elizabeth "SittingBullshit" Warren (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:21 pm

  39. I’m looking to all of you … to help us … to fabricate a new nation.

    Comment by Our Composite President (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:25 pm

  40. Mommee! Why don’t you wear pretty clothes that look nice on you like that Mrs. Romney does? Sometimes the pictures of you really embarrass me, and my “friends” are laughing behind my back.

    Comment by Malia Obama (0dbe1e) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:27 pm

  41. gives acting bad name
    f*ck that Alec Baldwin
    and his Schweddy Balls

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (1f7484) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:35 pm

  42. “Now, nobody will question MY bloodlines, when I apply for that teaching job at Harvard !”

    Comment by Tanning Mom (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:39 pm

  43. White County Judge Thomas Hughes concluded that Duncan bought the winning ticket, even though lottery records and store security video didn’t synch up to the precise timing of the purchase

    That’s not a problem. The picture and video of African American man wearing a hoodie buying (maybe) skittles and iced tea doesn’t synch up either, but that didn’t stop me.

    Comment by Special Prosecutor Angela Corey (d22d64) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:43 pm

  44. It still has to be Travon Martin, or at least I can imply it.

    Comment by Special Prosecutor Angela Corey (d22d64) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:44 pm

  45. “I’m a white Indian.”

    Comment by Elizabeth Warren (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:46 pm

  46. “Me, too !”

    Comment by Tanning Mom (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:46 pm

  47. “I’m a gay American !”

    Comment by Jim McGreevey, former Governor of New Jersey (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:48 pm

  48. “So am I !”

    Comment by Charles Johnson, proprietor of (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:49 pm

  49. “I’m a composite girlfriend !”

    Comment by Genevieve (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:53 pm

  50. “I’m just the ex-body man—how come nobody in the media want to talk about me ?”

    Comment by Reggie Love (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 2:55 pm

  51. Damn! I sure do not remember the campaign being this stressful in 2008.

    Comment by Dave Axelrod (0dbe1e) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:00 pm

  52. Thanks to the ketchup queen, I am the richest man in the senate.

    Comment by John effin Kerry (44de53) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:00 pm

  53. Hmmm–I wonder if I can get the GSA to install a few more mirrors around this place.

    Comment by Barack "narcissus" Obama (0dbe1e) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:05 pm

  54. “I support Dope and Change !”

    Comment by Woody Harrelson (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:07 pm

  55. “I like Biden and Obama, too !”

    Comment by Susan Sarandon (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:08 pm

  56. “Today is ‘Quatro de Cinco,’ as they would say in Austrian !”

    Comment by Barack "The Linguist" Obama (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:11 pm

  57. “C’mon, everyone, I had to fabricate a composite boyfriend girlfriend for the book. After all, I most obviously wasn’t there for any of Barack’s dates.”

    Comment by Bill Ayers (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:17 pm

  58. Thank God Cinco de Mayo is on a Saturday this year!

    Now, of any white students wore USA flag t-shirts today, then you know . . .

    Comment by Sammy Finkelman (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:44 pm

  59. My book was just a humble man-bites-dog story.

    Comment by Barack "I love canines ... barbecued, on a bed of arugula" Obama (486a22) — 5/4/2012 @ 3:49 pm

  60. Number 57 was not me, just for the record.

    Comment by Sammy Finkelman (0dadb5) — 5/4/2012 @ 4:08 pm

  61. Hey, I was the first Obama body man and Reggie Love gets all the love. I demand a recount.

    Comment by Nick Colvin (e7a709) — 5/4/2012 @ 5:01 pm

  62. Tucker Carlson, that bow-tyin’ white boy, thinks he can criticize Native American women like Elizabeth Warren.

    …What? I never called him any names!!

    Comment by Jehmu Greene (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 5:50 pm

  63. 61 comments and no one can supply the correct spelling of “cognitive”.

    Comment by SPQR (453cf2) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:40 pm

  64. No one said there was going to be a spelling test.

    Comment by ESL teacher (e7a709) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:49 pm

  65. 61 comments and no one can supply the correct spelling of “cognitive”.

    Comment by SPQR — 5/4/2012 @ 6:40 pm

    Oh, we noticed it, all right.

    Comment by Your fellow commenters, who just realized their polite ignoring of a typo has brought out some rude and condescending tendencies in one of us (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:51 pm

  66. Dear “Your fellow…”, it is NOT a ‘tendency’. As you would know if you paid any attention.

    Comment by SPQR (453cf2) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:54 pm

  67. Just wait until tomorrow when I announce Barack Obama will succeed me someday at Berkshire Hathaway! I expect my stockholders will be over the moon, because they know I’m always right!

    Comment by Warren Buffet (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:57 pm

  68. Dear Miss Manners:

    I spotted a spelling error in (unbelievable but true) the very title of a blog post recently. I thought of ignoring it, but after some consideration, thought it more expedient to correct the matter, and in addition, to point out how odd I thought it was that no one had corrected it before myself. What would you have done in my place?

    Comment by Spelling Police, Quite Right (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:57 pm

  69. Plus, it will make sure the IRS drops that meritless lawsuit.

    Comment by Warren Buffet (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 6:58 pm

  70. Spelling Police? I want your badge number.

    Comment by SPQR (453cf2) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:03 pm

  71. Gentle Quite Right Commenter:

    Thank you for your question. Generally speaking, it is always a far greater error to point out someone else’s mistake, unless of course grave consequences would result from the ignoring of such a mistake, such as noticing the wrong pill being administered at a pharmacy, for example.

    Miss Mannaers would require more information before knowing the results of such an error as you describe. Was the blog post creating a trip hazard?

    Comment by Miss Manners (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:05 pm

  72. Honesty requires Miss Manners to point out that the typo in the previous post was in fact not a test. That was an actual typo, and Miss Manners is gently laughing at herself over her cup of tea.

    Comment by Miss Manners (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:07 pm

  73. Dear “Your fellow…”, it is NOT a ‘tendency’. As you would know if you paid any attention.

    Comment by SPQR — 5/4/2012 @ 6:54 pm

    Oh. You mean it’s not a tendency, but a deeply ingrained practice? We weren’t going to be so harsh. But if you continue to insist…

    Comment by Your fellow commenters, who just realized their polite ignoring of a typo has brought out some rude and condescending tendencies in one of us (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:12 pm

  74. SPQR never laughs “gently”.

    Comment by SPQR (453cf2) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:13 pm

  75. and he once shook his own hand to see what all the fuss was about…

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (1f7484) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:20 pm

  76. gasbag Jehmu say
    all you bow-tyin’ white boys
    can all go to Hell

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (1f7484) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:23 pm

  77. Well, Mr. Carlson is male, he is white and he has been known to wear bow ties. No apology necessary, right?

    Comment by Jehmu Greene (e7a709) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:32 pm

  78. Also, Carlson probably ate his share of CrackerJack, if you get my drift. Probably has a few white sheets his his closet, too.

    Comment by Lizbet Warren (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:39 pm

  79. Tucker Carlson obviously acted stupidly.

    Comment by President Barack H. Obama, Healer of Planets and Suppressor of Tides, I mean Transcripts (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:39 pm

  80. What, some ofay is upset he gets called a white boy? These peckerwoods need to get a grip — come round my house and you’ll hear this stuff all the time. What’s the problem?

    Comment by Maxine Waters (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:47 pm

  81. should be around

    Comment by Spelling Po-lice (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:48 pm

  82. And just HOW how do you know I’m not from the UK? I am OUTRAGED at the racism present on this thread!

    Comment by Maxine Waters, who never, ever misses an opportunity (498806) — 5/4/2012 @ 7:51 pm

  83. You know what you are? The lot of you are pansy asses.

    Comment by Dan Savage (0dbe1e) — 5/4/2012 @ 8:03 pm

  84. You know what you are? The lot of you are pansy asses.

    And proud of it!

    Comment by Richard Grenell (bf8ad7) — 5/4/2012 @ 8:05 pm

  85. “I don’t know what Joe Biden was talking about, because Barack most definitely does not have a ‘big stick’ !”

    Comment by Michelle Robinson Obama (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 8:39 pm

  86. “Not around you, he doesn’t !”

    Comment by Reggie Love (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 8:40 pm

  87. Are people allowed to use their regular names in the sockpuppet thread?

    Comment by WTF is going on around here (c41574) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:00 pm

  88. I never sockpuppet. Its beneath me.

    Comment by SPQR (26be8b) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:01 pm

  89. I think it is horribly sexist that Obama thinks that I need/want the government to help me with every step of my life.

    Comment by Julia (c41574) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:03 pm

  90. Is it also sexist that Obama wants you to have choices when it comes to your body?

    Comment by tye (420898) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:24 pm

  91. Whoever sockpuppeted “tye” there did a pretty good job of posting a comment with the mixture of utter vacuousness and hot-aired filled strawmen we’ve come to expect from “tye”.

    Nice job.

    Comment by SPQR (26be8b) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:30 pm

  92. Well, if you put it that way. I am happy to give up my free will to the government as long as I can have abortions.

    Comment by Julia (c41574) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:33 pm

  93. (Sung to “Me and Bobby McGee” )
    Freedom’s just another word for free condoms.

    Comment by SPQR (26be8b) — 5/4/2012 @ 9:36 pm

  94. “Hey, what’s the deal with this Elizabeth Warren lady who says she’s an Indian ? Is she really running for Senate ? She should be running a donut shop or a 7-Eleven, like all the rest of those people from India !”

    Comment by Joe Biden (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 10:03 pm

  95. “Why is it that I’m called ‘a white Hispanic,’ yet Elizabeth Warren is called simply, ‘a Native American’ ? I’m at least five shades darker than she is !”

    Comment by George Zimmerman (0ae97d) — 5/4/2012 @ 11:28 pm

  96. Vote Obama and I won’t abuse your wife.

    Comment by Sherrod Brown (44de53) — 5/5/2012 @ 2:52 am

  97. When will they harvest me some eyes?

    Comment by Blind Chincom (44de53) — 5/5/2012 @ 2:59 am

  98. Are people allowed to use their regular names in the sockpuppet thread?
    Comment by WTF is going on around here — 5/4/2012 @ 9:00 pm

    NO, which is why we all wish that you’d stop using yours.

    Comment by Regular Name (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 3:21 am

  99. I should be the next cover girl. I mean man.

    Comment by Rachel Maddow (44de53) — 5/5/2012 @ 3:22 am

  100. Harvester of eyes, that’s me
    And I see all there is to see
    When I look inside your head
    Right up front to the back of your skull

    Comment by BÖC (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 3:35 am

  101. I’m a Near-oquois!

    Comment by Liz Warren (721840) — 5/5/2012 @ 5:10 am

  102. 13 comments and no one can supply a missing apostrophe?

    Comment by Just yankin' SPQR's chain, now (325a59) — 5/5/2012 @ 6:06 am

  103. ”””””” Happy?

    Comment by Tailface Warren (721840) — 5/5/2012 @ 6:09 am

  104. Just yankin’ SPQR’s chain is a good thing, doncha ya know.

    Comment by General Jocelyn Elders (662a22) — 5/5/2012 @ 8:44 am

  105. Oh is THAT what “yanking your chain” means? I thought it meant busting chops (or does that mean something different now too)?

    Comment by That one guy who's still living hopelessly in the 50s when it comes to figures of speech (325a59) — 5/5/2012 @ 8:52 am

  106. Speaking of figures of speech, I think it’s pretty funny that some people think “composite girlfriend” means something other than “the personality traits of all the male roommates I had in college.”

    Comment by President Barack H. Obama, Renowned Cherisher and Protector Of Womenkind Everywhere, just ask Julia (325a59) — 5/5/2012 @ 8:56 am

  107. I knew Barack’s old girlfriend seemed familiar. She seems just like a combination of 1981, May through October.

    Comment by Hugh Hefner (bf8ad7) — 5/5/2012 @ 10:36 am

  108. bow-tyin’ white boyz
    just say “NO!” to Shamu Green
    let her stay on beach

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (f36c14) — 5/5/2012 @ 10:44 am

  109. I’m a Nava-ho!

    Comment by Dances With Truths Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 11:48 am

  110. I’m a Semi-nole!

    Comment by Lies Like A Rug Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 11:54 am

  111. I’m A-patchy Indian!

    Comment by "You can tell i'm Indian because i want to take all of the white man's money" Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 11:57 am

  112. warren nuthin’ but
    a goddam Fauxahontas
    of Fugawi tribe

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (f36c14) — 5/5/2012 @ 11:57 am

  113. I belong to the “Up the CREEK without a paddle” tribe.

    Comment by Off-The-Reservation Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:02 pm

  114. I belong to the Little River Band; both the Native American tribe AND the Australian pop music group. I’m like a true renaissance woman, or something.

    Comment by Doesn't know Shoshone from shineola Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:11 pm

  115. hang on!… help is on the way…

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (f36c14) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:12 pm

  116. I’m A-rapa-hoe!

    Comment by Down wit' the hip-hop Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:14 pm

  117. no justice when Chief
    Illiniwek gets boot but
    fake squaw gets Harvard

    Comment by elissa (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:14 pm

  118. what is “fair share” of
    Native American blood
    for Democrat Liz?

    Comment by elissa (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:23 pm

  119. I’m a Winnebago!

    [Hey, have you seen my a$$ lately? It's TRUE.]

    Comment by "Think I'm lying? So Sioux me!" Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:27 pm

  120. I belong to the Ho-Chunk Nation. Chunky Hoes unite!

    Comment by Chicka-saw an opportunity and pounced on it" Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:32 pm

  121. I love all you guys. Emphasis on “guys”.

    Comment by B. Hussein Obama (662a22) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:35 pm

  122. I thought Johnny was interested in me for my mind.

    Comment by Bunny Mellon (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:43 pm

  123. Breaking!!! Harvard faculty lore has it that one of Elizabeth Warren’s forebearers may have hung around Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show.

    Comment by The National Enquirer (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:55 pm

  124. Why is that Warren woman getting so much attention? This is Julia’s week and I am the one who killed Bin Laden!

    Comment by Prezzident B. Obama (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 12:59 pm

  125. Okay, I see what all the confuzzlement was about. I didn’t claim that I have 1/32 Cherokee blood in me . . . I meant to say that when I was growing up in Oklahoma City a Cherokee girl once bled on me for 30 seconds.

    Kicked her butt, I did. Those high school debates can get rough!

    Comment by "As clear as the Native American features on her pasty white face" Warren (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:01 pm

  126. Malia, honey, I know you’re confused by what you saw, but I can explain. You see, Uncle Reggie was just sticking his furry dog’s tail into daddy’s mouth. Daddy was hungry for some dark meat, that’s all.

    Comment by President "the Down Low average is way UP" Obama (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:25 pm

  127. colonel once hunt deer
    with full-blooded Navajo
    that makes me cousin

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (b3f585) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:27 pm

  128. I did too have actual girlfriends! As the clinic records will plainly show . . .

    Comment by Barry Soetoro was a playa! (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:32 pm

  129. One of my best friends for the past 30 years is a full-blooded Navajo, which makes me ONE-HUNDRED PERCENT . . . the friend of a Native American.

    [I teared up a little bit just now. I'm so awesome!]

    Comment by Icy (1b8eb0) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:37 pm

  130. call me crazyhorse but
    Warren doesn’t look Siouxish
    just typical lib

    Comment by Colonel Haiku (b3f585) — 5/5/2012 @ 1:56 pm

  131. Alec Baldwin is an ignorant asshat…I apologize for descending into the triviality of name calling. I simply do not have the energy to respond in any other way.

    Comment by g walker (23cfe9) — 5/5/2012 @ 3:14 pm

  132. Yeah, have Romney go to South Philly and exchange those food stamps for cash – 50c for a dollar – to buy crack. Or have him buy a shopping cart full of ice cream with them, I’ve seen that happen.

    Food stamps are awesome.

    Comment by Amphipolis (e01538) — 5/5/2012 @ 3:54 pm

  133. Why don’t they let me come to important meetings anymore? Is it something I said? Do you think they’re going to try and replace me on the ticket? Seriously, should I get a food taster?

    Comment by Vice President Joe Biden (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 4:14 pm

  134. How’s your campaign launch going, Barack?

    Comment by The OSU half empty stadium (18d8d7) — 5/5/2012 @ 5:15 pm

  135. “Can we redistribute some Indian blood from those who have to the have-nots ? C’mon, it’s unfair that the 1% have all the Indian heritage, while the 99% of us have to fabricate our resumes in order to get teaching jobs at Harvard !”

    Comment by Lawyer Who Likes to Sioux Corporations (0ae97d) — 5/5/2012 @ 5:59 pm

  136. I’m turning Cherokee
    I think I’m turning Cherokee
    I really think so;
    Turning Cherokee
    I think I’m turning Cherokee
    I really think so

    Comment by Elizabeth "My my, i do believe i've got The Vapors" Warren (8d0fcc) — 5/6/2012 @ 3:13 am

  137. Leave her alone.

    I was at the Chicago Police Academy. I wrote “white”. About half of my classmates wrote “black” Was a kid, looked just like me, wrote down “other”.

    In retrospect, I should have written “human”.

    Comment by nk (875f57) — 5/6/2012 @ 3:22 am

  138. Not a Bear?

    Comment by Pundits A Plaudit (8e2a3d) — 5/6/2012 @ 5:13 pm

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