Sockpuppet Friday (Moon Unit edition)
[Posted by Karl]
As usual, you are positively encouraged to engage in sockpuppetry in this thread. The usual rules apply.
Please, be sure to switch back to your regular handle when commenting on other threads. I have made that mistake myself.
And remember: the worst sin you can commit on this thread is not being funny.
—
In the segment on space policy during last night’s CNN debate, Wolf Blitzer observed that a lot of people have lost their jobs in Florida as a result of the decline of America’s space program. It was left to the viewer to draw the inference that Newt Gingrich’s renewed emphasis on ideas like a permanent moonbase was perhaps not merely one of his recurring flights of futuristic fancy, but also an unsubtle pander to a bloc of voters in a key primary. Left entirely unmentioned was the fact that space programs are among the very few Americans support cutting and the inferences that might be drawn about a politician who will pander away even low-hanging fruit.
–Karl
Ding!
Karl (8cdbad) — 1/27/2012 @ 6:47 amwe should send the alaskan snowbilly hoochie uterus mama into space so she don’t constantly tempt me with her microwave jpgs as I type one-handed ogodogodogodsarahbristolmoosehhhhhhh! . .
happyfeet (1adf4d) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:23 amHA!! HA!! I have a high IQ after all! And this totally unbiased study PROVES IT!!
Joe Biden (1adf4d) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:29 amI really enjoy mocking Indians. I can get away with it because the MSM give Democrats cover.
VP Biden (318f81) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:34 amIf a mandate tasted like cheese sticks, woudja eat it?
Harey Carey (b0e533) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:34 amanother Obama FAIL…
http://thearizonasentinel.com/2012/01/26/obama-failed-to-appear/
kay2the2nd (aff3f7) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:43 amI was so a Fannie Mae historian or something.
Newt Gingrich (b4fe48) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:44 amAfter decades of study, I still can’t pass the Turing Test.
Mitt Romney (1adf4d) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:50 amNot this shlt, again. You f@ckers ruin every single sock puppet thread.
JD (48f69a) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:55 amSomebody fix my website!
Patterico (b4fe48) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:10 amHmmmm…. get the unsuitable node message but seems to work if you go through the “last comment” link. Shoot I was hoping Ace would switch to this platform…oops!
madawaskan (89a442) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:15 amWhip Its, they’re not just for kids and desserts anymore!
Demi Moore (bf33e9) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:16 amYet strangely enough, I can.
Watson, Jeopardy! Champion of Champions (8e2a3d) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:28 amDoes this work?
Hello, My Name I Joe (8e2a3d) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:34 am‘parrently not.
Hello, My Name I Joe (8e2a3d) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:34 amI wonder if Solyndra needs a Historian?
Callista (44de53) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:36 amYou can’t buy a Slurpee at 7-11 without a little curry and goat.
VP Biden (318f81) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:37 am🙁
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
JD (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:47 amJD is a bad bad bad man. I know because I know things. I know things because I have an active imagination. I have an active imagination because I do drugs. I do drugs because the make the voices tell me to stop monkeymooning the potatohat.
EPWJ (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:49 amAm I still runnin’ for somethin’? I can’t remember what I was supposed to do today.
Rick Perry (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:51 amI personally vouch, staking my good name and reputation, on the existence of Barack Obama’s budget balancing plan.
Tax cuts for 98% of americans? I promise that has already happened.
Tommy X24rrr (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:52 amshouldn’t the focus of the thread be on specifically what I insist it should be? Even if that makes absolutely no sense?
I just don’t see how you doing what you want to learn what you want to learn will achieve totally unrelated goals that I came up with and seem relatively unimportant.
seattle snooki (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:56 amYou have to admit, when NYC assumed a gun owning Navy SEAL was insane and had him thrown in an asylum without checking him out, we had a point. You’d have to be crazy to expect NYC to treat such a person fairly.
Mayor Bloomberg (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:09 amBloomberg you islamophobe.
EffyousidewaysBloomberg (ef98f0) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:14 amDo Not Watch This Video
Trust me, not your lying eyes. The video might make Newt look like a Reagan supporter encouraging Republicans to be more conservative, but don’t worry about that. Trust me, instead. I will […] tell the truth.
DRUDGE REPORT (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:16 amReagan is holy. Anyone disagreeing with him is automatically wrong, even if he was saying stuff like ‘balance the budget’. How can a budget deficit be a problem if Ronald Reagan was president at the time?
Schizophrenic RINO (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:18 amSo, did everyone just adore my neon cobalt dress at the SOTU. All the other frumpy guests in my box faded into the background due to my brillance. I just love being the star of the show.
Michelle Obama (8aabf0) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:19 amI totally thought it was great that you wore a $3000 dress to a speech where you ostensibly supported the 99%. It’s subtle humor like that which keeps life interesting.
Kinda inappropriate look, too, for a SOTU, but enough to leave room for the sapphire stud bikini you plan to wear next year.
1% (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:24 amDon’t try to pretend you have cajones on my turf, Buddy.
Jan Brewer, Gov of AZ (8aabf0) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:26 amNewt’s got a point. The Chinese are trying to get to the moon, why not us who have already been there and would have had a colony on it 30 years ago but for the democrats? is it a form of welfare? Sure. But considering the the trillions we have and are continuing to spend on slugs and junk like high speed rails to nowhere, I rather spend some money on geniuses who’s work will eventually lead to things that benefit us all. And while we are at it, lets restart the huge collider program in Texas that was killed off during the Clinton Administration.
cubanbob (ad2274) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:55 amLet me be clear: I have the greatest respect for President Reagan. I think he personally understands the threat of communism.
as loyal a friend and ally to Ronald Reagan as could be found in the day (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:59 amMoon colony? I think I saw a moon colony just the other day. A bunch of people with their pants down around their ankles were bent over while looking at the ground at something behind them. I wanted to stop and go over to see what the thing on the ground was, but my Secret Service driver wouldn’t stop the car. I think it could have been a Big Effing Deal!
Joe Biden (58dde3) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:29 amAntarctica has oxygen, water, etc. but only scientists are willing live there for short times.
So let’s go colonize the moon! Who wants to volunteer to live where walking outside means instant death, plus you have to bring your own air?
I hear the golfing is spectacular.
Looney Newt (b120ce) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:36 amDon’t Cut and Run
A Real President (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:40 amHEY! Leave my secretary alone!
Just because I brought her up? Repeatedly? Schyeah. Who are YOU to question MY math? I’m friggin Warren Buffett and I don’t answer questions!
Warren "Chris Crocker" Buffet (325a59) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:40 amYeah, guys. You’re supposed to accept what your betters tell you and not ask any questions. That it doesn’t make sense to you only proves you’re all idiots.
President Barack H. Obama, Healer of Planets and Supressor of Tides, I mean Tax Brackets (325a59) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:46 amCigarettes are intolerable for airing on TV, but people drinking animal urine and animal semen in exchange for money is wholesome entertainment.
… so long as there aren’t any chewing tobacco commercials. That would be gross!
National Broadcasting Corporation, AKA GE AKA Democrats (7362cd) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:48 amI’m the smartest person in whatever room I happen to wander into.
Sloe Joe (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:11 pmHey, if you were married to a no-talent pile of crap you’d be huffing some stuff, too!
Demi (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:19 pmAm I still runnin’ for somethin’? I can’t remember what I was supposed to do today.
Comment by Rick Perry — 1/27/2012 @ 8:51 am
Oh good! We’re safe . . . for awhile.
The flock . . . and the ranch hands (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:22 pmWhich one was I, the dog or the pony?
I must contemplate this while I hang out at one of my houses.
Warren Buffett's secretary (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:28 pmYou vill NOT be critical of Ear Leader!
MSM "analysis" of Gov Brewer (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:31 pmOh, hi! Hey, I’m pretty busy right now, directing my first movie — yep, branching out again — but I’ll be with you in a minute …
“Okay, Miss Locklear, you’re the rehab veteran; Miss Moore is your new roommate in the lockdown facility. It’s a hot summer day and the a/c has just conked out. As the two of you are ‘getting comfortable’ Miss Park, in her starched white nurse’s uniform, walks in to give you your meds. All right, people, let’s make the magic happen! And . . . action!”
Auteur Worthing (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 1:46 pmHmm… the leader of the most powerful nation-state on this puny planet looks most unappetizing. Maybe we should rethink our plans.
A Really Big Canamint (6451eb) — 1/27/2012 @ 2:55 pmI like space adventures more space adventures please
happyfeet (3c92a1) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:34 pmLike I told everyone before, I’m outta here. The first thing I’m going to do is say goodbye to slick willie and take 2/3rds of our combined assets. Next my lovely assistant, is going to dump that worthless weiner guy, bring her child and move in with me.
Hillary, Sec. of State and one big old mama. (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:38 pmNa, na na na, hey, hey hey, goodbye!
We like you Newt, and yes you could go toe to toe with the Obama guy in a debate, (although the liberal moderators will chew you).
The Republican populace (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:43 pmBut we really need to nominate a guy who can win. Sorry bucko, you’re not it. Maybe Mitch of Indiana?
bitchy mitchy is not ready for prime time anymore he wants to go unite with his happy Romney friends for to “save the safety net”
hurray!
I’ll be over here
happyfeet (3c92a1) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:44 pmWhaa, whaa.. That evil guy lied about me.
Newt (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:45 pmActually, I was just telling everyone the truth, you liberal slut.
Mitt (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:46 pmI still love to be on top of things.
Madonnagal (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 3:50 pmBottoms for me.
Barney's Frank (44de53) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:01 pmHey diddle, diddle
JoePerryProject (b486eb) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:05 pmput the Newtie in the middle
rode a shark jumped over the Moon
Be sure to check our wedding registery at Walmart. Looking forward to lots of nice things to start our new life together.
Bwarney Frank & Fiance (8aabf0) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:11 pmI advise Barney Frank to make sure his Tardasil injections are up to date before his nuptials.
Rick Perry (bf33e9) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:15 pmMOMMMMMIE!!!!!!! I want a MOONBASE but Uncle Willard says NO! Waaaaaaaaaaaah!
Little Newton Leroy (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:30 pm[X] To the moon, Alice! Bang-zoom!- Ralph Kramden, 1952
TV GUIDE votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:36 pm[ ] To the moon, Callista! Bling-zoom! – Newt Gingrich, 2012
[ ]Romney [ ] Gingrich [ ] Paul [ ] Santorum [X] boobs
Dolly Parton votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:38 pmNewt, That there moon base thingy y’all talked about in Florida is a dang fine idea fer gettin’ jobs here in Texas.
Oops.
Rick Perry (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 4:44 pm123 delegates.
Texas (401f3a) — 1/27/2012 @ 5:14 pmHave you had enough of London fog? New York snow and California smog?
Mel Torme (44de53) — 1/27/2012 @ 5:14 pmWould you say “arrive derci” to Rome in June?
Then fly with me Lets go swinging on the moon.
Ok you occupiers, this time we really, really mean it. No camping in McPherson Square or Freedom Park in DC. You have until, well, Monday afternoon to remove the tents.
US Parks Dept Spokesperson (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:28 pmNo fair US Parks Dept. Where are we going to live now?
DC Rats (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:29 pmYou rats can always go back to the White House or the offices of the DC City Council.
US Parks Dept Spokesperson (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:30 pmThe bankruptcy is a minor set back, President Obama. Can you slip us another $100 million or so in grants? How about loan guarantees that get paid after Democratic contributors equity investments?
President of Ener1 (a1fcca) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:43 pmWe won’t stop protesting until Wall Street become lap dogs for the Obama admin.
OWS (ef98f0) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:48 pmCome fly with me, let’s fly, let’s fly awaaaaay
Let’s take this tune up to the Moon
and let’s colonize away
Come fly with me, don’t worry how we’ll pay
And while we’re there we’ll build Jurassic Parrrrk
–a comfy home where dinos roam
and we’ll walk them after darrrk
Come fly with me — what do you mean, “clusterfark?”
Once I get us up there
where the air is pumped inside
We’ll just glide
starry-eyed
Once I get us up there there’ll be no going back
Imagine the stack
Of bills we’ll run up while we’re together
Cloning-wise it’s such a perrrrfect daaaaay
Newt Gingrich channeling Ol' Blue Eyes (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 7:50 pmYou just show me how and I’ll feed the cow
to the dino birds of prey
Come fly with me—now why would you run away?
How dare you peons want english as the official language you waaaaaaaaaaaacists.
OWS (ef98f0) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:08 pmRegolith
DIRTY WORDS FROM NEWT #14 (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:39 pmMoonpies
Desserts by Newt, page 19 (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:43 pmGreen Cheese
Hors d'oeuvres by Newt, page 26 (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:47 pm[ ] moonbase [X] moonshine
Jed Clampett votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:47 pmRaptor wings in Garlic Buffalo Sauce
Appetizers by Newt, page 1 (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:48 pm[ } Sea of Tranquility [X] Moon River
Johnny Mercer and Henry Mancini (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:50 pm[ ] moonlight [X] Bud Light
Budweiser votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:50 pmI was going to jump over the moon, but the raptors ate me.
The Cow (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:53 pm[ ] mooners [X] nooners
University of Miami votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:54 pmGoodnight Me.
The Moon (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:55 pm[ ] moon shots [X] tequila shots
Tijuana votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:57 pm[X] Which is right [X] Which is an Illusion
Moody Blues (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:59 pm[X] waxing [ ] waning
Harry Moon votes... (9d1bb3) — 1/27/2012 @ 8:59 pm[ ] without a dream in my heart [X] without a love of my own
Bobby Vinton (577ce5) — 1/27/2012 @ 9:06 pm[ ] moon shots [X] body shots
Tila Tequila votes (8ddb53) — 1/27/2012 @ 10:05 pm[ ] Lunatic Fringe [ ] Paulestinians [ ] Anyone that thinks Newt can win in the general election
Reality votes (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 1:20 am[ ] Dark Side of the Moon [ ] Bark at the Moon [ ] Walking on the Moon [ ] Moonage Daydream
PinkOzzyPoliceZiggy (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 1:31 amThe lunatic is in Newt’s head,
Roger Waters (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 1:45 amThe lunatic is in Newt’s head . . .
Wish Warren would shut the f___ up. I had my eye on ANTOHER 2ND home in Arizona, this one not so close to the fairway, with a pool, water feature, gazebo,fire pit, 5 bedrooms, 3 baths, a play room, overlooking the open desert. Sunsets to die for! It looks like something on HGTV. And this stupid bastid is going round saying I don’t make so much is causing banks not to give me a mortgage. SHUT UP!WHy did you decide to make me the big example?
Who the hell wants to leave Arizona in winter to spend a January night in freezing DC sitting next to a Sasquatch/Wookie hybrid attacking Cheese Doodles all night? It was a cloud of Doodle dust. DOn’t think the drycleaner can get that orange crap off my blouse.
Warren Buffet's Secretary (34ad0e) — 1/28/2012 @ 5:20 amFreak out in a moonage daydream, oh yeah.
Newtie Stardust (b486eb) — 1/28/2012 @ 6:36 amYou don’t know the power of the dark side
Looney Newt (e01538) — 1/28/2012 @ 9:52 am10101100010101011100010111
MittBot T-1000 (7729bb) — 1/28/2012 @ 10:11 amAll the folks wonder
Col Haiku (563f77) — 1/28/2012 @ 10:25 amWhy do I hate Newt so much?
Does Romney pay me?
Wow we’re criticizing Obama because he is black?
Eff you liberals.
If Obama were cleaning up Bush’s mess he would have stopped bailouts for banks.
Vote Obama and we will be Communist by 2015.
Dohbiden (ef98f0) — 1/28/2012 @ 10:36 amVo Ahead, make my day’
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Budget_of_NASA#Annual_budget.2C_1958-2011
werner von braun (87e966) — 1/28/2012 @ 10:38 amJust wait until I debate Obama, mano-y-mano! I’m gonna wipe the floor with him, just like I did with John King and Juan Williams.
What? Yes, I know those guys are not running for president. But did you see me kick their butts? I body-slammed ’em, baby! Whoo!!!
Now, if Obama gets all mean and attacky, like Mitt, then I’m gonna have to point that out. Ain’t gonna be no “there you go again” moment with me, honey. I’m going all-in with “why you bein’ so mean, playa?” Whoo!!!
Newtonian political physics (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 11:14 amKeep your ‘lectric eye on me babe
Put your way-gun to my head
Pwess your space face close to mine, love
Fweak out in a moonage daydream oh yeah!
Lady Bawney Fwank Stardust (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 11:19 amWhat are y’all freaking out about? My advisors told me I needed to “press the flesh” with the sheeple!
Ya know what? This is all getting too complicated. I’m just gonna take my pension check and go back to work.
And on this farm he HAD a ewe, EE-I-EE-I-O (6f50d8) — 1/28/2012 @ 12:11 pmJust to sum up, he wasn’t focusing on NASA.
http://www.space.com/14363-newt-gingrich-space-moon-colony-mars.html
chesley bonesteel (87e966) — 1/28/2012 @ 5:47 pm“In German und in English
Tom Lehrer (9d1bb3) — 1/28/2012 @ 6:54 pmI’ve learned how to count down…
Und I’m learning Chinese,
Says Wernher Von Braun.”
Y’know, thinking back on it, it might have been a Big Effing Tower. Was I in Paris? I forget where I am some times.
…What was I saying? Oh, yeah, Paris. That’s in Texas, right? Rick Perry is the governor, there, as I recall. Wait, no, he’s the lead singer from Journey.
Ok, wait. I’m confused. Why is the lead singer from Journey a presidential candidate again?
J Biden, Esq, (8e2a3d) — 1/29/2012 @ 12:50 amG.O.P. was having trouble
What a sad, sad story
Needed a new leader
To restore its former glory
Where, oh where was he?
Where could that man be?
We looked around
And then we found
The man for you and me
And now it’s…
Springtime for Gingrich and G.O.P.
Maddow is giddy and gay
Reagan them in a frantic pace
Look out,
A Romney-Newt debate
Springtime for Gingrich and Tiffany’s
Winter for Cartier’s in France
Springtime for Gingrich and Tiffany’s
Come on, Newties
Go into your dance
I was named New-ton Le-roy
And liked the zoo as a small boy
Everyone says I’m a moon-ie
Just because my plans sound loony
Don’t be stupid, be a smarty
Come and join my NewTzie Party
Springtime for Gingrich and G.O.P.
Florida’s gone kosher today
Bomb throwing is my style and then,
Reagan is on the rise again
Springtime for Gingrich and G.O.P.
Mel Brooks (9d1bb3) — 1/30/2012 @ 6:15 pmIran’s gone shopping once more
Springtime for Gingrich and G.O.P.
Means soon we’ll be going
We’ve got to be going
You know we’ll be going to war