Patterico's Pontifications


Santa Is Real!

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 7:51 am

At least this Santa is. He is born to be Santa. This is his natural look:

And he passes on great stories:

Anderson thought about dropping the question “Have you been good?” from his routine. But he changed his mind when he realized kids expect to hear that question.

Besides, it has provided some zinger responses.

“One little guy said, ‘I’m a 5-year-old and sometimes I pass gas,’ ”Anderson recalled. “There was another little boy. I said, ‘Have you been good?’ and he said, ‘I’m a normal 5-year-old boy,’ which sort of spoke volumes, if you know 5-year-old boys.”

Then there was the kid who outlined the requirements for achieving goodness.

“I did have one who said very seriously, ‘I don’t hit, spit, kick or plug things in,’ ” Anderson said.

And there was the kid who summed it up this way: “Well, let’s just say I’ve been better than last year.”

Three huge cheers for that kid. We can’t be perfect, folks — but at least we can strive to be better than last year. Tell half the lies you told last year. Screw over fewer people than you did in 2011. You’re a serial killer? Strive to kill fewer people this coming year.

Hey, every little bit helps.

P.S. You can still do your shopping at Amazon for Christmas, if you act today (or tomorrow). If you sign up for Amazon Prime, your items ordered today (or tomorrow) will arrive in time for Christmas. Amazon Prime is $79 per year, and entitles you to free 2-day shipping no matter how small your order. To sweeten the pot, Amazon Prime now has streaming video, at cheaper prices than Netflix.

Frankly, as an iPad owner, I think Netflix is slightly the better deal if you do a lot of movie viewing on your iPad. Nevertheless, I have signed up for Amazon Prime for a year, to watch the streaming movies, compare the service to Netflix, and enjoy the quick shipping.

If you decide, as I did, to give Amazon Prime a shot, make sure to use the search box on the right sidebar. I’ll get a small and legal kickback that costs you nothing, but which softens the blow of my monthly hosting fee. Thanks as always.

13 Responses to “Santa Is Real!”

  1. Now that is one authentic looking Santa.

    “I asked another little boy what he had done to be good, and he said, ‘Well, I keep my pants on,’ ” Anderson said. “We have a lot of politicians who haven’t learned that one.”


    no one you know (325a59)

  2. I get Amazon Prime jsut for the shipping perks, as I send almost all my gifts directly to my Dad’s place for family occasions.

    I’ve already ordered over $300 of stuff through the Patterico box and will likely up that by another $100 or so tonight.

    Everyone else, get crackin’! 😉

    Karl (f07e38)

  3. I use Patterico’s search box when I order from Amazon, too. It’s easy.

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  4. All my 10 year old is asking for from Santa is a hand written letter from Santa “that actually responds to the letter I sent him”.

    JD (9351a4)

  5. Fake Santa – have you been good this year?

    Daughter – I think so. My Dad probably thinks so. I would rather you not ask my Mom.

    JD (9351a4)

  6. JD @ #5,


    Dana (4eca6e)

  7. Smart daughters, JD!

    DRJ (a83b8b)

  8. Yes, DRJ. They take after their mother.

    JD (9351a4)

  9. Letters FROM Santa…

    Anyone see Christmas Mail on ION last night?

    AD-RtR/OS! (dadeb3)

  10. Amazon Prime now ALSO includes free Kindle library borrowing

    Kevin M (563f77)

  11. Santa says my present will be delayed until November 6.

    Kevin M (563f77)

  12. The dystpoians in North Korea won’t like this.

    Dohbiden (ef98f0)

  13. Dystopians*

    Dohbiden (ef98f0)

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