Patterico's Pontifications

5/25/2011

Oh My… Feds to Prosecute John Edwards (Update: Morrissey Predicts Plea Bargain and I disagree; Malkinalanche)

Filed under: General — Aaron Worthing @ 7:07 am

[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.  Or by Twitter @AaronWorthing.]

Update: Ed Morrissey writes:

Bet on the plea bargain. Edwards has been in court enough to know what a mountain of evidence means to an unsympathetic defendant, and Edwards is about as unsympathetic as it gets. A rich lawyer cheats on his dying wife, gets his girlfriend pregnant, and then moves cash all over the board to keep it quiet — what is there for a jury to like?

I will have to disagree with that. Morrissey’s argument is almost objectively correct. Ordinarily a lawyer as sharp as Edwards would understand all of that and seek a plea. But this requires Edwards to be honest with himself and not let his ego get in the way. He has to believe he can’t talk his way out of it. Are you seeing the flaw in Morrissey’s analysis?

The original post, as is, follows.

Update (II): Malkin links.

—————————

From ABC News:

The United States Department of Justice has green-lighted the prosecution of former presidential candidate John Edwards for alleged violations of campaign laws while he tried to cover up an extra-marital affair, ABC News has learned.

A source close to the case said Edwards is aware that the government intends to seek an indictment and that the former senator from North Carolina is now considering his limited options. He could accept a plea bargain with prosecutors or face a potentially costly trial.

John, some free advice.  If they offer a plea that allows you to avoid actual prison time, take it.  Seriously you don’t want to risk going to prison.

You won’t do well in prison.

And this all comes on the heels of this news:

Furious John Edwards has allegedly vented his anger at mistress Rielle Hunter over the steamy sex video they made during his White House run.

In an amazing outburst, the shamed politician reportedly exploded after a judge ruled portions of his testimony under oath would be made public.

An insider said: ‘John took his anger and frustrations out on Rielle.

‘He screamed at Rielle, calling her an idiot for not destroying the tape, and yelling that she made a fool of him for talking him into making it,’ a source told the National Enquirer.

‘Rielle was in tears, and tried to apologize, but John didn’t care.

And isn’t that so typical?  He knowingly and voluntarily consented to make the tape, and didn’t personally see to it that it was erased, but its all her fault, not only for not destroying it, but for even convincing him to agree to it.  Hey, John-boy, here’s a hint.  If you don’t want the world to learn about an affair with someone…  don’t make a sex tape.

And for that matter, use protection, you idjit.

Hat tip: Hot Air.

[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]

FLASHBACK COURTESY OF PATTERICO: January 2008:

Robert Novak reports President Barack Obama would offer the Attorney General’s post to John Edwards:
“Illinois Democrats close to Sen. Barack Obama are quietly passing the word that John Edwards will be named attorney general in an Obama administration. Installation at the Justice Department of multimillionaire trial lawyer Edwards would please not only the union leaders supporting him for president but organized labor in general. The unions relish the prospect of an unequivocal labor partisan as the nation’s top legal officer.

Too bad he didn’t get to become AG, huh?

87 Comments

  1. he really really should think about talking to a reality tv producer and making what lemonade he can out of this

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:20 am

  2. John Edwards in “Real Housewives of Orange County, NC”.

    Comment by EC (dda60e) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:22 am

  3. would it be mean to send him soap on a rope?

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:26 am

  4. Sad to see such a smart man be so utterly dumb.

    Comment by Kman (5576bf) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:30 am

  5. It couldn’t happen to a more deserving fellow…

    Imagine what will happen to this guy in prison?

    Comment by Bob Reed (5f2db5) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:35 am

  6. Bob

    > Imagine what will happen to this guy in prison?

    And will they make a tape of it?

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:36 am

  7. Hey, maybe he can channel the spirit of his rape/murder room-mate’s dead momma…

    Comment by LowKey (8096f2) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:45 am

  8. I can see it now, edwards on the witness stand channeling the baby crying about her father being imprisoned and asking for mercy.

    Comment by Jim (844377) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:45 am

  9. Or, for a radical idea, how about staying faithful to your wife? (Yeah, I know.)

    The discussions between Edwards and his lawyers are going to be pretty interesting “take the pea deal. No, I’m innocent!”

    I do feel sorry for the kids.

    Comment by rbj (487e2c) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:47 am

  10. Silky Pony is gonna make some cell mate VERY happy…

    Comment by Scott Jacobs (d027b8) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:48 am

  11. Is what he did worse than perjury? You know lying under oath about having sex with an intern versus using money people gave you to use to run for office to cover a sexcapade that would prevent you from running for office.

    Comment by quasimodo (4af144) — 5/25/2011 @ 7:56 am

  12. Remember a couple weeks ago when Yelverton was yammering on about how evil and corrupt conservatives are because the Republican party allowed Newt to run for President? Now, it was obviously a facially idiotic position, on many levels. I would be interested in seeing how Yelverton would reconcile that with Edwards having been the Dem VP candidate, and 2 time Presidential hopeful. It might cause Yelverton’s midget racist skin flute playin head to assplode.

    Comment by JD (85b089) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:02 am

  13. “But this requires Edwards to be honest with himself and not let his ego get in the way. He has to believe he can’t talk his way out of it. Are you seeing the flaw in Morrissey’s analysis?”

    Hubris. You gotta love it.

    Comment by Jack (f9fe53) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:03 am

  14. Edwards can’t be honest with anyone; especially not himself…

    Comment by Bob Reed (5f2db5) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:08 am

  15. #3, #4, #5, and #9, shame on you. Prison rape is not a fit subject for jokes. Well, not unless they’re actually funny, which yours are not. It was disgusting when Bill Lockyer made such a joke, and it isn’t any better this time around.

    Comment by Milhouse (9ef3cc) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:16 am

  16. “Imagine what will happen to this guy in prison?” … “And will they make a tape of it?”

    I still don’t understand why prison rape is such a popular joke, even regarding a jerk like Edwards. The baseline assumption of our society is that all prisoners get raped in American prisons, and the baseline cultural standard is that it is funny.

    I don’t care what happens to the worst-of-the-worst, but don’t non-violent run-of-the-mill prisoners deserve protection against physical attack?

    Comment by gp (72be5d) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:22 am

  17. But this requires Edwards to be honest with himself and not let his ego get in the way. He has to believe he can’t talk his way out of it.

    Exactly. Edwards always beleived he could get away with infidelity. He believes in two Americas — the one where John Edwards gets away with anything and everything, and the one where everyone else has to play by the rules.

    Comment by aunursa (a2a019) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:56 am

  18. Obama is not at war with islam just the extremists who follow the quran with orgasmic glee.

    Obama is not at war with John Edwards just his Mistress Rielle Hunter.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:08 am

  19. JD–I’m not speaking for Yelverton, but there is a crucial difference from Gingrich. Gingrich’s escapades were already publicly known; Edwards, as of the time he ran for VP, not (if I remember the chronology correctly).

    As for the main post-what’s that saying about having a fool for his client?

    Comment by kishnevi (a78c6d) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:19 am

  20. kish

    its he who represents himself has a fool for a client.

    i do wonder if edwards will allow himself to be represented in this. he might just decide that he is the best person handle the case. and it allows him to communicate with the jury without “testifying.” that is very useful.

    so… get out your popcorn. this could be fun.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:43 am

  21. I have an ample supply of popcorn already. I am forced to admit that the best sauce to go with it is pure Shadenfreude.

    Comment by BarSinister (b3a9ab) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:55 am

  22. I do agree that prison rape is not funny in and of itself.

    I think Aaron’s joke is that John Edwards has spent so much effort being a pretty boy, which served him well in many ways, and it’s amusing that his crimes would flip that effort to the worst thing he could possibly be: a pretty boy in prison.

    It’s funny enough. I grant it three stars.

    But for all my talking about making prison a very unpleasant place yesterday, prison rape has got to be the most counterproductive thing that could happen in a prison.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:59 am

  23. this could be fun

    I think it’s entirely possible he might go out in the back yard and blow his head off.

    Comment by happyfeet (a55ba0) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:06 am

  24. I assume that Amanda Marcotte will be checking in with her typically flawless, logical, and sober-minded commentary on this issue.

    Comment by SPC Jack Klompus (c1922b) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:14 am

  25. So, will the National Enquirer get named in the coverage?

    Will the NE now get the Pulitzer it deserved (or at least, deserved more than some who did get one)?

    Comment by jim2 (6482d8) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:19 am

  26. When did the Humor Police show up?

    Comment by LowKey (8096f2) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:41 am

  27. No Amanda Marcotte will accuse Eric Holder of being enslaved by his white wignut masters.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:42 am

  28. I’ll bet on the plea bargain. 20 ego points says this does not go to trial.

    –JRM

    Comment by JRM (de6363) — 5/25/2011 @ 11:04 am

  29. I think John Edwards will take a deal if it keeps him out of prison. This guy simply cannot leave his palaces for a prison cell, if he can help it.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 11:05 am

  30. happy

    > I think it’s entirely possible he might go out in the back yard and blow his head off.

    actually in seriousness, i agree.

    Except probably more like shoot himself in the chest. that way his face stays pretty.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 11:19 am

  31. I wonder if he’ll have sense enough to marry Rielle, won’t that take her off the witness stand? The way he’s acting, he’s about to piss her off – and that could turn out very badly.

    Comment by Mike Giles (a0a8cc) — 5/25/2011 @ 11:26 am

  32. John Edwards would drug himself if he resorted to suicide.

    He is not the kind of person to use a gun. He would take the woman’s path (no offense intended to women).

    Mike, I think John knows he’s got Rielle so desperate that he doesn’t have to worry about her. Sure, if she was sane, she’d be done with him, but some guys manage to rely on desperate affection. It’s very sad. I think Rielle was not all there upstairs, and Edwards used that, ruining her life. She’s responsible for her behavior, but I think John is even more responsible.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 11:32 am

  33. Money is fungible. Edwards has a LOT of it. He could have paid for all his dalliances out of his pocket litter. How is it that he used campaign cash and failed to cover it with his own money?

    Comment by quasimodo (4af144) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:03 pm

  34. quasi

    actually there is bluntly confusion on what he might be charged with. i am trying to find out definitively what it might be.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:19 pm

  35. This couldn’t be happening to a more deserving guy.
    And, the best part, as a convicted felon, he’ll be dis-barred, right?

    Comment by AD-RtR/OS! (b8ab92) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:23 pm

  36. AD

    > And, the best part, as a convicted felon, he’ll be dis-barred, right?

    That’s my understanding. i think in theory you can remain a lawyer, but in practice it is never allowed.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:28 pm

  37. But ambulance-chasers in prison jokes ARE funny!

    Comment by dfbaskwill (ca54bb) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:35 pm

  38. Just a few years ago, this man was 60,000 Buckeye voters and one heartbeat away.

    Comment by aunursa (a2a019) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:38 pm

  39. Just a few years ago, this man was 60,000 Buckeye voters and one heartbeat away.

    And he’s still very pretty. He still has that smooth whine.

    He’s just an Oprah show and a sob book away from a complete comeback. Nixon did it, why not Edwards?

    Seriously, once this legal matter is resolved, he could run for office again. If he’s smart, he could win a House seat and spend a few years trading on his notoriety.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:45 pm

  40. He made a sex tape? It is never appropriate but you expect this kind of stupidity from Paris Hilton. But this guy was running for President and he made a sex tape!

    It sort of makes you yearn for the good old days of Nixon and JFK…

    Comment by WarEagle (08c61f) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:46 pm

  41. But this guy was running for President and he made a sex tape!

    It takes a very screwed up ego to think you can get away with it.

    I can only imagine what would have happened if he got real power. This is the kind of crazy that causes huge damage. He’s make Nixon look like Mitch Daniels.

    And I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s in office within the decade.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:51 pm

  42. Oh damn. Guess me typing butt bingo, if he goes to da’ house, is off limits, eh?

    The dude made millions in court battles, doubt he’ll spend time in a max. Low security Fed house, if that.

    Comment by JP (508ef3) — 5/25/2011 @ 12:58 pm

  43. He may have used campaign money because it was easier to hide from his wife.

    Comment by jim2 (6482d8) — 5/25/2011 @ 1:10 pm

  44. # 14 Get a life.

    Comment by Frank (167bb8) — 5/25/2011 @ 1:19 pm

  45. War Eagle

    it will probably bother you to learn that JFK might have had a sex… well, not a sex tape, but a sex film…

    The story goes like this. Marilyn Monroe definitely had one and i won’t give you the gory details but reportedly it showed her carrying out a sex act with an unseen man so that she is clearly visible and he is not.

    And it is believed to be very likely that the man is either JFK or RFK. i imagine its because the men sounded very similiarly.

    but we might never know for sure because a man bought it at auction claiming that his intention was to destroy it, so that it could never make it onto the internet.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (e7d72e) — 5/25/2011 @ 1:25 pm

  46. Newsworthy? lol Democratic leaderships’ sexual pecadilloes are of little interest to me. What is so insane about it is their “followers” just enable it— they were all over the allegations against Clarence Thomas by the pillar of virtue Ms. Anita Hill. ALL OVER IT!!! Clarence Thomas was bealzebub incarnate. And it never happened.

    John Boy is the second coming of JR Ewing– in real time real life— and there isn’t one peep about “I Believe Rielle” or anything else that would disgrace this d-bag with an overfunctioning penile complex.

    Hey DUMB ASS! You are in the public eye, so keep Ol One Eye OUT OF THE PUBLIC EYE. Capice?

    My money is that John Boy will eat the gun before it is all said and done. If he thinks the proctological exam so far has not been a chair of bowlies just wait til they start the tax audit enema.

    But let’s be honest here…..how far is the Holder Justice Department really going to let this go on….I mean violation of campaign laws— the stench from President Snow Job’s White House is wafting in the distance…. if Congress begins to smell blood in the water, who’s to say that the SS SnowBama won’t get caught up in an innocuous investigation that matures around primary time?

    Is Bubba Clinton and the old party hacks allowing this to go forward as a sideswiping distraction to the Methadon-Freak-in-Chief… i would find it very hard to believe if someone were to say that SnowBama’s people are not keeping a close eye on this….election law violations…hmmmmm…..not promising.

    I wonder too if it gives Issa some relief from Democratic scorn over investigating anything. Where did he disappear to? Make some hay.

    I think John Edwards is a waste of sperm cells and I never thought he had a single clue about running a country let alone his personal life.

    Funny what passes for manhood these days.

    All hail the Queen. ROFLMAO What a complete doofus! Sit down, Boy.

    Comment by bear1909 (239c22) — 5/25/2011 @ 2:49 pm

  47. As a former democrat, and someone who was a supporter and volunteer on the Edwards campaign web site, I can plainly state that while I have no sympathy for John Edwards, I have none for Rielle Hunter either. I have no problem with him yelling at her, but I think Edwards should be yelling at his old pal, David Bonior, the arrogant, radical leftist who duped Edwards into hiring radical leftists hand picked by communist Zack Exley, one of which was Rielle Hunter. Exley’s strategy wasn’t to help Edwards, but to help elect Obama. Hunter was Exley’s ace in the hole, but there were many others, like Edwards’ campaign website tech manager, Aaron, who along with his fellow parasites harassed and abused the wives and mothers, fathers of vets, and vets themselves, who were Edwards supporters initially. If you were witness to the deranged leftists, who Aaron employed, who looked down on average Americans who comprised so many of those who naively put their faith in the Edwards campaign, pledging their time, money and energy into it, it was enough to make you ill.

    Bonior him self was in on the scam as well. He allowed the fascist leftists to abuse and ultimately ban decent average Americans when they stood up for themselves after being subjected to ridicule and hateful abuse on the Edwards blog, and when they’d turn to the campaign manager for assistance and be lied to, and then they’d get no help at all. I can’t help but wonder how many other dem campaigns have some of Exley’s nut roots camp fascists attached to them, seeking to help drive them over the cliff.

    Comment by Mary (090eb0) — 5/25/2011 @ 3:48 pm

  48. bear

    well, bluntly if thomas was guilty, i think they would have had a fair point.

    The problem was the evidence was specious and it suspiciously lined up with the worst stereotypes about black men.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (73a7ea) — 5/25/2011 @ 4:03 pm

  49. A lot of people don’t know this, but that tape is only 60 seconds long.

    I wrote that! Nobody steal that!

    Comment by TimesDisliker (25285d) — 5/25/2011 @ 5:37 pm

  50. I claim no special insights about Edwards, his willingness to accept a plea, or the prosecutors’ willingness to offer one when and if he’s indicted (and he hasn’t yet been), but:

    Throughout this entire affair — and I use that term understatedly — Johnny Reid Edwards, former U.S. Senator from North Carolina, has proved himself to lack an ounce of courage.

    Why expect him to find the courage to face what would — under every possible scenario, including even those in which he’s acquitted — be a trial that would set new standards of savage media-age humiliation?

    Look for plea discussions to include not just jail time but desperate bargaining by the defendant for assurances regarding conditions of confinement. (“Mr. Edwards asks that paragraph 8(b)(iii) be re-written to guarantee that his bath soap bars all come on lanyards.”)

    Comment by Beldar (7c0dd5) — 5/25/2011 @ 8:56 pm

  51. Re disbarment, a lot would depend on what he’s charged with. If it’s fraud-related — intentional violation of campaign finance laws, conspiracy to obstruct justice or cover up with respect to same, fraudulent misreporting — most state bars would consider those crimes of moral turpitude. If there’s a plea, or once appeals are exhausted, the conviction collaterally estops the convict from denying the factual elements of the crime(s), so Edwards couldn’t re-argue his innocence in disbarment proceedings. If he can paint this as some sort of technicality, I suppose there’s a remote, outside chance he could do a deal whereby he surrenders his license without a struggle but with some long-term window to seek re-admission someday.

    But if you were a North Carolina bar official considering his continuing ethical fitness to practice law, and Edwards were adjudged guilty (either by trial or plea), would you unleash this guy again to be anyone’s licensed fiduciary? I wouldn’t.

    Comment by Beldar (7c0dd5) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:04 pm

  52. Joking about the soap, but since we’re talking about the feds here, among his best-case scenarios he could totally hope to negotiate something involving a low-risk population of non-violent offenders with high security. If they’re landing on him like the proverbial ton o’ bricks, maybe not, though.

    Comment by Beldar (7c0dd5) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:08 pm

  53. Beldar

    i thought it was pretty much “committ a crime, lose your license.” but i could be wrong.

    As for whether edwards would accept a plea, no one can claim to be sure, so obviously you could easily be right.

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (73a7ea) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:18 pm

  54. Apparently Edwards has already contemplated suicide,

    ‘In early March, his legal team told him there was a strong chance he could be indicted, and John completely lost it.

    ‘He cried his eyes out and said, “I won’t go to jail. I’d kill myself first!”‘

    I don’t think he will because I believe he really loves his children and they will be the only reason he doesn’t.

    Comment by Dana (4eca6e) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:24 pm

  55. “Mr. Edwards asks that paragraph 8(b)(iii) be re-written to guarantee that his bath soap bars all come on lanyards.”

    If you didn’t laugh at this, you have no soul.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:28 pm

  56. wingnut*

    Has Amanda Marcotte blamed the g*d damn christofascists?

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:29 pm

  57. dustin

    tsk tsk laughing about prison rape. how dare you. there is nothing funny about prison rape. /sarc

    Comment by Aaron Worthing (73a7ea) — 5/25/2011 @ 9:44 pm

  58. Aaron, the disbarment standard varies from state to state, and I’m too lazy to look up North Carolina’s. But Tex. Gov’t Code § 82.062, by way of example, provides:

    Any attorney who is guilty of barratry, any fraudulent or dishonorable conduct, or malpractice may be suspended from practice, or the attorney’s license may be revoked, by a district court of the county in which the attorney resides or in which the act complained of occurred. An attorney may be suspended from practice or the attorney’s license may be revoked under this section regardless of the fact that the act complained of may be an offense under the Penal Code and regardless of whether the attorney is being prosecuted for or has been convicted of the offense.

    And Tex. Gov’t Code § 81.078 provides:

    (b) On proof of an attorney’s conviction in a trial court of competent jurisdiction of any felony involving moral turpitude or of any misdemeanor involving the theft, embezzlement, or fraudulent misappropriation of money or other property, the district court of the county of the residence of the convicted attorney shall enter an order suspending the attorney from the practice of law during the pendency of any appeals from the conviction. An attorney who has been given probation after the conviction, whether adjudicated or unadjudicated, shall be suspended from the practice of law during the probation.

    (c) On proof of final conviction of any felony involving moral turpitude or any misdemeanor involving theft, embezzlement, or fraudulent misappropriation of money or other property, the district court of the county of the residence of the convicted attorney shall enter an order disbarring the attorney.

    (d) In an action to disbar any attorney for acts made the basis of a conviction for a felony involving moral turpitude or a misdemeanor involving theft, embezzlement, or fraudulent misappropriation of money or other property, the record of conviction is conclusive evidence of the guilt of the attorney for the crime of which he was convicted.

    Comment by Beldar (7c0dd5) — 5/25/2011 @ 10:29 pm

  59. I have restored the update that I originally added to the post, which Aaron deleted by adding his own update without refreshing.

    That is:

    FLASHBACK COURTESY OF PATTERICO: January 2008:

    Robert Novak reports President Barack Obama would offer the Attorney General’s post to John Edwards:
    “Illinois Democrats close to Sen. Barack Obama are quietly passing the word that John Edwards will be named attorney general in an Obama administration. Installation at the Justice Department of multimillionaire trial lawyer Edwards would please not only the union leaders supporting him for president but organized labor in general. The unions relish the prospect of an unequivocal labor partisan as the nation’s top legal officer.

    Too bad he didn’t get to become AG, huh?

    Comment by Patterico (c5e915) — 5/26/2011 @ 12:24 am

  60. Yeah, too bad. Funny how things work out. Even given his current difficulties, Edwards has more professional integrity than the racists, liars, and crooked bastards running the Justice Department now.

    Which, of course only serves to indicate the piss poor state of law enforcement at the highest levels of our nation.

    Comment by ropelight (eea158) — 5/26/2011 @ 4:08 am

  61. A very special post for Milhouse and gp:

    – That boy is gonna play catcher on the prison hardball team.

    – No worries. He will find plenty of volunteers willing to goo in his hair do his hair.

    – Unlimited opportunity to pole the electorate . . . to feel the pulse of the people . . . to take the temperature (the old-fashioned way) of the common man.

    – “‘Silky Pony’ is right! Get on all fours and lift your tail, beyotch!!!”

    – Do not let your heart be troubled! In prison he will STILL be the Breck Girl.

    – I don’t know what people are so worried about. He’s a lawyer; he’s used to ‘negotiating a settlement’.

    – He’s a Democrat; he’s used to ‘getting on his knees and capitulating’.

    – He was a U.S. Senator; he’s used to ‘whoring himself out to powerful interests’.

    Comment by Icy Texan (3f01f5) — 5/26/2011 @ 6:18 am

  62. I’m appalled. Rape is not a joke. Yes, Beldar’s sneaky formulation in #49 was genuinely funny, and thus exempt from all rules, but the rest of it is disgusting. What kind of person makes unfunny jokes about such a subject? And how can you do so, and then turn around and complain about Ed Schultz?

    Comment by Milhouse (9ef3cc) — 5/26/2011 @ 7:14 am

  63. Edwards has wallowed in self-pity from the very start of this fiasco and he’s shown not even a spark of interest in shouldering responsibility and rehabilitating himself

    You’d think he’d want to do this for his children, but he’s a surpassingly self-centered douche. Remember how he used to pimp out his dead kid in campaign materials?

    He’s just a terrible person, and the court can’t but take that into consideration on some level.

    Comment by happyfeet (3c92a1) — 5/26/2011 @ 7:20 am

  64. I’m amazed that in this day and age anyone makes a sex tape and then is surprised when it goes public. That stupidity in and of itself should render Edwards and anyone else ineligible for public office on the grounds that if you are too stupid and inept to manage your private sex life, you are too stupid and inept to manage any public issues.

    Comment by Rochf (f3fbb0) — 5/26/2011 @ 10:12 am

  65. Rochf – ate at LaBamba earlier today. Proof that Allah luvs us, and wants us to be happy.

    Comment by JD (306f5d) — 5/26/2011 @ 10:46 am

  66. Comment by Milhouse — 5/26/2011 @ 7:14 am
    What kind of person makes unfunny jokes about such a subject?
    – So your issue isn’t with the making of jokes; you’re just being a humor critic?

    And how can you do so, and then turn around and complain about Ed Schultz?
    – It’s statements like this that gets others here into arguments with you. Ed Schultz is INCAPABLE of making (or taking) a joke. The man is a hate-filled pathetic creature, and your comparison is a pathetic apples-to-oranges exercise.

    Comment by Icy Texan (3f01f5) — 5/26/2011 @ 11:29 am

  67. John Edwards being off color insulted is unlike Laura Ingraham being off color insulted

    One is merely speaking her mind on politics, frankly with class as far as I know. The other cheated on his dying wife and broke the law and is a total coward about the consequences.

    That’s why calling Laura a talk slut bugs people who find Edwards to be fair game.

    OK… I’m Master of the Obvious right now, aren’t I? Anyway, Icy’s right.

    Also, OF COURSE it’s sick and depraved to laugh a little at John being raped. That’s a horrible thing, and everyone knows that. Hence the gallows humor. If anyone seriously advocates raping John Edwards, I’m sure Icy and the rest will disagree with that.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/26/2011 @ 11:34 am

  68. Right, Dustin.

    The last thing I want is for that slick trial lawyer to have a case for suing the federal penitentiary system for failing to protect his arse.

    Comment by Icy Texan (3f01f5) — 5/26/2011 @ 11:50 am

  69. Milhouse – Send Edwards some Astroglide if you’re worried about him getting hurt in prison.

    Comment by daleyrocks (bf33e9) — 5/26/2011 @ 7:53 pm

  70. Oh, and Milhouse, you think that Ed Schultz is a standup guy, do you?b

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 8:36 pm

  71. For the record, I’m not trying to pile on Milhouse. I like his comments, but I see why (And have experienced) how that gets on a nerve or two. His heart’s in the right place, but I suggest a bit of perspective on the low importance of anything that happens in a discussion thread.

    Comment by Dustin (c16eca) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:05 pm

  72. Look. Any subject can be funny. There are funny Holocaust jokes. And it’s OK to tell them, because laughter obeys no rules. But if you joke about the Holocaust and are not funny, then you’re just making light of something that’s deadly serious. Rape is much the same. Just imagine someone making the same joke about your sister, mother, or daughter; would you still think it was OK? Edwards is a POS; Schulz is a POS; but the prospect of their getting raped is not funny. You have to work at making it funny.

    Comment by Milhouse (ef4a58) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:23 pm

  73. Edwards prison tattoo:
    If you’re gonna ride my a$$ you could at least feather my hair!

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:26 pm

  74. Look, I’m just in favor of the guy getting raped in prison…

    But only if it isn’t rape-rape…

    Comment by Scott Jacobs (d027b8) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:27 pm

  75. John Edwards’ prison-lawyer business card:
    In the courtroom or in your cell; either way I will get you off!

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:29 pm

  76. Overheard in John Edwards’ prison cell:
    “Ouch! Damn! Usually I get paid $1000 an hour to do this to other people.”

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:33 pm

  77. Cruel and unusual punishment:
    Conjugal visits by Al Grope and the International Monetary Frog

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:36 pm

  78. Redd Foxx: “This is it. This is the big one. I’m comin’, Elizabeth!”

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:39 pm

  79. What the? :lol:

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:40 pm

  80. So what do you peoole think of Bill Lockyer? Was it OK for him to make that crack?

    Comment by Milhouse (ef4a58) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:41 pm

  81. John Edwards is a silky phony………….An actual communists wet dream.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:47 pm

  82. “Redd Foxx: “This is it. This is the big one. I’m comin’, Elizabeth!””

    LaMont Texan – Classic, you big dummy!

    Comment by daleyrocks (bf33e9) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:48 pm

  83. John Edwards: This is it. This is the big one. I’m gonna sue you Elizabeth.

    Sorry I just had to do that.

    Comment by DohBiden (15aa57) — 5/26/2011 @ 9:58 pm

  84. Thanks, daleyrocks!

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 10:45 pm

  85. Milhouse, I wouldn’t be using the term “crack” in this context . . . not unless you want to read about Edwards being caught with contraband — specifically, a pipe in his cr***

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 10:49 pm

  86. I guess Milhouse doesn’t want to hear about Edwards’ legal briefs being around his ankles.

    Comment by Icy Texan (3bc534) — 5/26/2011 @ 11:41 pm

  87. No, I don’t. I want to hear about his first visit to the prison barbers. I want to hear about his encounter with the gourmet cooking of the prison kitchen. I want to hear about the first time he tries to pull a “do you know who I am?”. I do not want to hear about his being raped, or murdered, or anything like that. If there is reason to expect any of that to happen to him then the gov’t has no right to imprison him in the first place.

    Comment by Milhouse (ea66e3) — 5/27/2011 @ 7:31 am

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