Patterico's Pontifications


In Praise of Spam…

Filed under: General — Aaron Worthing @ 5:58 am

[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.]

Oh, sure, we hate spam.  I can’t tell you how many times I have been told I have won millions of dollars in a sweepstakes I never entered, or how there is this guy in Nigeria who really needs my help laundering his money.  As Kevin Butler tells you, don’t believe everything you read on the internet.  That’s how World War I got started.

But sometimes spam can save lives:

Black Widow attempted New Year Moscow attack but blew herself up by mistake

A “Black Widow” suicide bomber planned a terrorist attack in central Moscow on New Year’s Eve but was killed when an unexpected text message set off her bomb too early, according to Russian security sources.

The unnamed woman, who is thought to be part of the same group that struck Moscow’s Domodedovo airport on Monday, intended to detonate a suicide belt on a busy square near Red Square on New Year’s Eve in an attack that could have killed hundreds.

Security sources believe a spam message from her mobile phone operator wishing her a happy new year received just hours before the planned attack triggered her suicide belt, killing her but nobody else.

She was at her Moscow safe house at the time getting ready with two accomplices, both of whom survived and were seen fleeing the scene.

Islamist terrorists in Russia often use cheap unused mobile phones as detonators. The bomber’s handler, who is usually watching their charge, sends the bomber a text message in order to set off his or her explosive belt at the moment when it is thought they can inflict maximum casualties.

So come on folks, let’s all get together and sing… “spam, spam, spam…”

I plan to have a breakfast of Spam and pancakes in honor of everyone who died stupidly for terrorism.

H/t: William Jacobson, who imagines that Skynet Stuxnet is behind it.

[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]

26 Responses to “In Praise of Spam…”

  1. Its the feel good story of the day. Heh.

    Aaron Worthing (b1db52)

  2. Schadenfreude doesn’t quite capture our pleasure.

    gary gulrud (790d43)

  3. Gary

    How about “splodyfreude?”

    Aaron Worthing (b1db52)

  4. Pretty sure I have a shadenboner.

    Scott Jacobs (d027b8)

  5. Pretty sure I have a shadenboner.

    Thread winner.

    Not presidential … but thread winner.

    SPQR (26be8b)

  6. Off topic, but…

    Whaddayaknow, it was not a conspiracy and a lie and a smear after all:

    Uploaded with


    oopsiedaisy (dafbd0)

  7. always screencap with chucky. you never know what will disappear down the memory hole.

    Aaron Worthing (b1db52)

  8. O/T:

    New Black Panther Party case: The facts are in

    The statements indicate several points: 1) the New Black Panther Party case brought by career Justice Department employees was meritorious on the law and the facts; 2) there is voluminous evidence of the Obama administration’s political interference in the prosecution of the New Black Panther Party case; 3) there is ample evidence that the Obama administration directed Justice Department employees not to bring cases against minority defendants who violated voting rights laws or to enforce a provision requiring that states and localities clean up their voting rolls to prevent fraud; 4) the Justice Department stonewalled efforts to investigate the case; and 5) vice chairman Abigail Thernstrom has, for reasons not entirely clear, ignored the evidence and tried to undermine the commission’s work.

    ….The Republicans need to go full blast on this corruption of the DOJ…..

    Baxter Greene (bdec36)

  9. Comment by SPQR — 1/28/2011 @ 6:54 am

    I must admit that it is a word I stole from Ace of Spades.

    Scott Jacobs (d027b8)

  10. baxter

    thanks. i did see that. i’ll probably post on it on monday to avoid the memory hole.

    Aaron Worthing (b1db52)

  11. The SPAM messages are so friendly, it’s hard to resist them.

    PatAZ (29affb)

  12. In his book “Rogue Warrior,” former SEAL Richard Marcinko, tells the story of his time in Beirut before the Marine barracks was blown up by a suicide bomber with a truck borne bomb. He learned that suicide bombers almost always had a detonator by remote control in case they lost their nerve. He suggested sending out random impulses on the frequencies usually used by the bombers. That way, the bombs would go off prematurely. His request was turned down for fear of civilian casualties. The Marine barracks was later blown up.

    Mike K (8f3f19)

  13. Hey, cool, I have a new friend here!

    Well, warm, actually. In fact, it’s hot as Hell here. But we can swap cool stories about our political activism, and really bond, ya know?

    Rachel Corrie (3e4784)


    IgotBupkis, President, United Anarchist Society (c9dcd8)

  15. and really bond, ya know?

    Well, you should have no problem wrapping it up…

    IgotBupkis, President, United Anarchist Society (c9dcd8)

  16. He suggested sending out random impulses on the frequencies usually used by the bombers. That way, the bombs would go off prematurely. His request was turned down for fear of civilian casualties

    Actually sounds like a good idea. Civilians are likely going to be killed anyway, yes? If it was done often enough they would likley have to give that technique up.

    MD in Philly (3d3f72)

  17. Fortunately in this country our violence prone people are somewhat self limiting. Between STDs, anal sex,same sex,and abortion their growth rate is stunted. The muslims breed like rabbits and their population grows despite poverty and suicide bombers.

    dunce (b89258)

  18. dunce – while you may not have discovered it yet for yourself, those of us who *have* enjoyed making the beast with two backs in many and divers (and ofttimes athletic) positions are having way too much fun enjoying each other and ourselves to waste any time on anti-social or anti-societal violence …

    While your muslim comparison is also a tad harsh, there is some analogous validity to it, in that the leporidae are known, under some circumstances, to eat their own young … sorta like what turning ’em into homicide bombers does – not exactly extending the family line …

    EricAzzWJohnston (e7cb73)

  19. *rinngg* *rinnnngggg*

    “Hello? Oh… no thanks, I wouldn’t be interested in switching to AT&–”


    qdpsteve (f1c59f)

  20. Mike K at 13 – Even more recently the US discovered that IED and suicide bomb makers in Iraq were using certain componenets in their construction. In a few cases they were killed when faulty components caused the bombs to detonate during construction. The proposal was made to flood the underground market with faulty components.

    The plan was rejected on humanitarian grounds.

    Have Blue (854a6e)

  21. Aaron – Note that Chuckles starts out by accusing Patrick of paranoid stalking and lying, even accusing him of making up evidence in order to make Chuckles look bad. When it is shown that the exact opposite is true – no retraction, no apology.

    Have Blue (854a6e)

  22. I love it when a plan comes together

    Jones (72b0ed)

  23. When I told one of my friends that karma is a bitch, she responded that the lovely lady in this case had gotten karmalized. :)

    The amused Dana (132cf8)

  24. That’s how World War I got started

    I take it that this is a punch line to a joke. What is the joke?

    rp (6f7ea7)

  25. Think about it awhile.

    SPQR (26be8b)

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