Sockpuppet Friday–The Barack the Barbarian Edition!
[Guest post by Aaron Worthing; if you have tips, please send them here.]
As usual, you are positively encouraged to engage in sock puppetry in this thread. The usual rules apply.
Please, be sure to switch back to your regular handle when commenting on other threads. I have made that mistake myself, alot.
And remember: the worst sin you can commit on this thread is not being funny.
—————–
And I am going to try something new on this thread. This literally might not work physically, or you all might decide this stinks as an idea. Using one of those polling widgets, I have nominated imho the five best sock puppet comments from the last sockpuppet friday. So vote for what you think is the best.
Also, please note that there were some worthy comments that were too long to put in this poll. And none of the nominees are mine, because that would be cheesy to nominate myself.
And is there a prize? Yes, there is. Respect. So there you go.
[Posted and authored by Aaron Worthing.]
You did not list any of mine. I’ll nurse that grudge for awhile.
SPQR (26be8b) — 12/17/2010 @ 9:09 amWay off subject, I got a bill from the L.A. Times last night .When I called to ask why the hell they were sending me a bill. I was told That I had signed up at a supermarket by a solicitor. I told them I would never subscribe to that crap rag and to cancel it now. Has the L.A. times resorted to sending I D theft punks out to get more papers off the Rack? Or worse are they doing it themselves? Nah would liberals lie,cheat and steal……..OOPS Keep your hands on your wallet folks,they will start doing this for Dem fundraisers soon
Jackosan (ea4bfa) — 12/17/2010 @ 9:19 amYou didn’t list any of mine. Racist!
The Emperor (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:07 amAlright then guys, its friday. My day.. You know the rules: show respect to The Emperor. Now have it boys.. Break a leg!!
sock puppet Joe (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:12 amStep one: Get some bars on Dad’s castle window.
And yes, Piers, THAT window.
Edward II (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:22 amI have an opinion about everything, and knowledge about nothing. If you beat me over the head you’d get a sound similar to a base drum.
Kfap (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:31 amIf I stand sideways in a stiff breeze, my head whistles.
Kfap (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:34 amThose Jewish cupcakes keep dodging my ovens.
Unhappyhand (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:35 amHell if I am giving him these suspenders.
Larry King (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:47 amall your monikers are belong to us.
lovey present day (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:49 amI’m totally non-partisan and civil. Please buy my book, Independent Nation: How Centrists Can Change American Politics and Wingnuts: How the Lunatic Fringe is Hijacking America. It has the word “independent” in it.
John Avlon (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:54 amI really don’t know anything about sockpuppeting.
That said, I’ll move along and let someone else, from a totally different IP, make a comment.
Wilson (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:56 amOh, and Rush Limbaugh is a drug addled fat slob. See, my insults scream “centrist.”
John Avlon (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:56 amWhat IS this sockpuppeting, Wilson?
By the way: Edward II? VERY underrated king. Glenn Greenwald did a great bit on his blog about it.
Ellison (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:57 amMiss me yet?
mike castle (6075d0) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:58 amJim Demint invented AIDS.
Alvin Greene (b54cdc) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:59 amDo I look like I care that your child is in danger?
Spiderman (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:59 amEllison,
I love that blog too! Have you also seen Greenwald’s best-selling books about Bush’s abuses of power?
Ryan (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 10:59 amShaken but not stirred… No, stirred but not shaken,.. no, not stirred but shaken. No, shaken stirred but not…
James Bond (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:03 amWhere can one find an answer about nearly everything without going to a library? I mean I have a computer, and access to the internets, but somehow, the solution to this problem eludes me.
stuck on Wilson (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:04 am…stirred shaken not but, No, not but shaken stirred, No, shaking my waist till my tiny wee wee is stirred… No,….
James Bond (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:08 amI am your moral and intellectual superior. I read crooksandliars and mediamatters.
Willie the Racist Hilljack (0d2ffc) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:09 amI love how, if — as this website is claiming — Obama is a “barbarian,” Bush is spared any criticism for his own barbaric abuses. Didn’t some part-time Brazilian guy write two best-sellers about this?
Rick Ellensburg (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:10 amI’m innocent, Glenn said so, no the blue wire get’s
noor mohammed (6075d0) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:12 amconnected to, did I say that outloud?
Paaaaat, I can haz comment space to trash Bush?
Dick Willspooge (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:15 amMe and Larry King are in the zipper club together.
Free Willie Clinton (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:15 amI demand net neutrality! If you’re mean to Odipshit, you must be equally nasty to Bush…oh, and RACIST!
Empama the Contrarian (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:19 amI’m as transparent as a mirror, and I like the view!
Odrama (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:23 amYou stoopid wing nazi faux news luvin racists are dumber than a turd.
Crooksandliars (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:30 amNet neutrality requires you to be equally nasty to Bush as you are to Otrauma!
Phuk Knuckleburg (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:31 amOur religion is better than your religion, you wingnut Christianist science deniers. Your religion is really a spinoff of ours. Plus, we killed your Messiah. HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
The Zionist Conspiracy (c07dfa) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:32 amI wish professors would not plagiarize.
Rawstory (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:33 amshaking my stirred but not taken, No, stirring my bum bum but not shaken, shaking as I drink it stirred, No, My name is Bond, James Blonde… No, My name is James, Bond James… Not right.. my name is shaken and don’t call me stirred!
James Bond (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:37 amI’m the smartestest steaming pile in the democratic party.
Briliiant Turd (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:37 amBarbarian?! Are you kidding me?!
NAACP (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:39 amWell, I voted for my own comment, of course!
Julian Assange (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:40 amOf course, since you didn’t have me first, the way I always should be, my comment doesn’t show up unless you hit the drop down menu arrow. I’m quite put out by that, and you know how I despise people who don’t put out.
Julian Assange (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:41 amMike Castle wrote:
How could we; you haven’t gone away yet!
Christine O'Donnell (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:43 amIf you do not watch yourself, I might just make sweet sweet love to you while you sleep with a torn lambskin.
Julian Assmunch (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:44 amAnd y’all thought that you had won!
Barack Hussein Obama, President of the whole United States of America! (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:47 amNot me, Julian: I am a borned again virgin, and one twenty-oneth century trend has completely passed me by!
Christine O'Donnell (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:48 amI seem to have left out the oven dodgers cables. Totally unintentional. I don’t fear the mossad. Nope.Not.One.Bit. I’m courageour like that.
Jewlian Assuage (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:48 amAsk for more negotiation, I dare you!
Assfuckistan (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:52 amHey, Julie, you can have me, and now I can even serve in the Navy!
Glenn Greenwald (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:53 amAnd y’all thought you could get rid of me! Hah!
Harry Reid (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:54 amI DREAM of a bedwetting Act, but it depends…
Harry Peed (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 11:58 amCan someone please get me out of here? Julian? Anyone?
PFC Bradley Manning (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:00 pmDon’t you worry, PFC Manning: when they’re done with you, I won’t protest at your funeral.
Fred Phelps (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:01 pmSpc Manning – I would like to extend my thanks and praise to your noble work, and I will certainly help raise money for your legal defense fund. A patriotic American like you should not be treated in such a manner.
Michael Moore (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:04 pmMy stuff has been read into the congressional record and quote in the NY Times. Take that, beeyotches.
Gren Gleenwald (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:07 pm@James Bond.
M (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:09 pmAm sorry Bond but you are broken…
Just how dumb do you have to be if you think that Rex Grossman is the answer?
Donovan McNabb (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:13 pmEnvironmental justice is one of the key components of Homeland Security.
Janet Napolitano (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:14 pmYou know, I really would love to own a dog again. It will show how much I changed.
Michael Vick (b1db52) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:14 pmThanks SCOTUS for allowing us to push misinformation. We really don’t want our viewers to know the truth. It would be bad for business.
We own you (8b3a2d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:14 pm-Fox and Friends
Ask me about negotiation, and my homicide bomber newsletter. It contains the popular Subjugation section with a feature article, Catching His Eye With Ankle Bruising.
@$$phukistan (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:14 pmWell, Don, baby, at least Rex knows how to run a two-minute drill in less than five minutes.
And it wasn’t me who
Terrell Owens (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:15 pmchokedblew chunks at the Super Bowl!I’m unretiring again.
Sent you a text about it. Attached pic is unrelated.
Brett Favre (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:17 pmWhy is it that a professor feels the need to plagiarize?
JD (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:18 pmI just love dogs to pieces! I just love ’em to death!
Michael Vick (b54cdc) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:19 pmWe used Howard Cossell’s toupee as a dust mop.
Zombie Don Meredith (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:19 pmWe are responsible for that crazed hilljack stalker that strums the ukulele. he is one of our mindless drones.
Rawstory, thinkprogress, mediamatters (96d86a) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:22 pmOccassionally, we’d rub one out in his hairpiece glue bottle.
Zombie Don Meredith (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:23 pmSpeaking of Fox and Friends, tune in tomorrow to see how short a skirt I’m wearing! I’ve got legs!
Alisyn Camerota (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:24 pmSo long, Barack. We will have fun in Hawaii without you. Good luck getting away by Christmas with the whiner from Searchlight in charge.
Michelle Obama (b334e9) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:36 pmBut who will pick up my poo?
BO (b334e9) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:37 pmExcuse me, Can I fart here?
Hillary Clinton (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:37 pmBo, can you teach your owner to fetch me a cup of coffee?
BJ Clinton (e7577d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:40 pmWhy not, Hillary; you did everywhere else.
Bill Clinton, the real President of the whole United States of America! (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:49 pmHey, at least I never got benched in DC!
Jason Campbell (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:51 pmYeah, Jason, you think you’re just so hot . . .
JaMarcus Russell (3e4784) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:53 pmWhere my car at, playa?
Marion Crackberry (0b469d) — 12/17/2010 @ 12:59 pmIsn’t it ironic? The Viking’s season, the Metrodome roof, and my career all collapsed at the same time!
Brett Pevre (0b469d) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:01 pmJoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mel G. (0b469d) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:04 pmWhen she shot that stag my man-berries shrank!
happyhappyjoyjoy (0b469d) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:08 pmI love her so much I hate her.
Oh, Conan! You big barbarian you!
KREEGAH, Lord of the Mugwumps (8096f2) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:13 pmAll you conservatives are ignorant for thinking that unemployment is worse than they promised it would be. And can you believe these rubes think that health care legislation will increase the deficit. I mean okay, if we keep it this way, it will be a problem, but Paul Krugman has a final solution to the problem.
WorldPublicOpinion.org (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:24 pmI’m on the comeback trail! First, “The Beaver.” Next, my own line of novelty birthday candles called “But First You Will Blow Me.”
Mel Gibson (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:41 pmMel
I think last night you were a little too hard on The Beaver.
June Cleaver (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:45 pm“Aaron.” That’s a Jewish name, isn’t it?
What? I’m just asking.
Mel Gibson (890cbf) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:46 pmThe Beaver is going to be great. For all you people who thought that Nell would be so much better starring a rabid anti-semite, this is the movie for you!
Jody Foster (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:46 pmOh am reminded of my commando years in Angola.. We came under much fire power.. I dived into the line of fire to save Bill’s ass.. Took one in the ass for the jerk. Shouldn’t have bothered. Son Of a b*tch!
Hillary Clinton (1fca40) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:47 pmNo, Mel, actually its a girl’s name.
Erin Worthing (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:48 pm> Took one in the ass for the jerk.
You have not ever done that for me, Hilldog. I begged for it, but you said you don’t swing that way.
Bubba Clinton (e7d72e) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:50 pmIf I tighten up my suspenders, my pants give a great crotch rub!
Larry King (848837) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:52 pmI’m going over to Boehner’s office to touch his gavel.
Nancy Pelosi (848837) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:55 pmIn my White House garden I can play squat-tag in the asparagus patch all by myself. It feels sooo good!
Michelle Obama (848837) — 12/17/2010 @ 1:57 pmThere are some real cringe inducing comments here.
JD (07faa1) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:01 pmOur new slogan is: “Erin go Broke!”
Irish Prime Minister (848837) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:03 pmI wake up every morning. Being Vice-President does that to a fellow.
Joe Biden (848837) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:06 pmI wish you would stop attributing that saying to me. I never make miskates.
alot (1db6c5) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:27 pmAin’t no way for Mel to dodge my oven, baby!
Lou C. Fur (7f42e2) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:41 pmCome on, guys! Gimme some hair to hide my Mickey ears.
Barack the Barber (7f42e2) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:47 pmWhy is it “3 wise men“? Why not “3 wise Latinas”? Racist, sexists!
Sotomayor (7f42e2) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:51 pmI got pulled from the shelves, again.
Chia Pet Obama (07faa1) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:53 pmWhat’s that? I’m 2% Jewish? Which part?
'Gelding' Gibson (7f42e2) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:55 pmMy weenie? Cut it off! I don’t care; cut it off!!!!
What’s the big deal?
William 'the dickless wonder' Yelverton (7f42e2) — 12/17/2010 @ 2:58 pmOk you people win, we’ll just roll over submissively. Pleae don’t hit us too hard with the newspaper.
Dem House pack of doggies (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:04 pmI’m soooooo disappointed the Obamas won’t be coming to my wedding. Every wedding has exactly two rude ingrates who complain about everything and invade people’s personal space and leave sh*tty narcissistic presents. Now I just know it’s going to have to be my weird uncle Rupert and his new wife Oleander. HOW embarrassing.
Kate Middleton (b5428c) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:08 pmI wish to thank the members of the house for finally realizing that it was over and approving the bill. I wish you had done it a few weeks ago as I am tired of having my rear being waxed by the Republicans. Hopefully I have a chance for reelection although you all didn’t help much!
Obamaman (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:08 pmI thought this week would go better.
Harry Reid (f0c487) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:09 pmSauronObama said that if I played along I could get the pretty all to myselfI control the senate. Anything passing has to meet with my approval.
Harry Reed guy (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:11 pmDon’t let any one fool you, I still have power. And denile is just a river in Egypt..
Nancy P (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:13 pmHey Barack, we had this discussion earlier. Since your “pals” in the house can’t figure out that most of America doesn’t support the view of your left wing democrat and chicago beat them with a stick people… Please bend over and ask.. “Thank you sir, may I please have another.”
John B 7 Mitch M (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:22 pmYo Harry @ 100. it’s over and YOU lost.
Mitchy guy (0cd6a2) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:25 pmHillary Clinton wrote:
Madam Secretary, we didn’t really need to know that you weren’t wearing your thong panties.
The late Richard Holbrooke (bd7e62) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:52 pmBubba, she did it for me! 🙂
The late Vince Foster (bd7e62) — 12/17/2010 @ 3:54 pmI was in Angola, and I never saw her.
tony montana (6075d0) — 12/17/2010 @ 4:01 pmHere’s why, Tony: you were . . .
Wm J Clinton (bd7e62) — 12/17/2010 @ 4:44 pmSee, I told you my stuff was stored in my official residence. Nothing will hold me back now.
Rahm Emanuel (b334e9) — 12/17/2010 @ 5:18 pmI am innocent of all charges.
Kwame Kilpatrick (b334e9) — 12/17/2010 @ 5:19 pmThis thread is just awful – not nearly as good as last week’s. Barack, drop off your autographed copy of Of Thee I Sing and let’s sneak a snack off the reception table and get out of here.
Michelle "the perfect guest at any occasion" Obama (b5428c) — 12/17/2010 @ 5:39 pmI have a degree from ASU in recreation and tourism management so the reason i can not get a job organizing keggers in the boonies is because of greedy rich people.Liberals are not lunatic psychopaths that shoot people for doing their job so i must be a gun clinging conservative.
florida school shooter (b89258) — 12/17/2010 @ 6:43 pmDon’t interrupt me while I’m circling the drain.
Ric Caric has nothing on me, beyotches!
Willie the Wanker (c07dfa) — 12/17/2010 @ 7:11 pmEric Blair is our sponsor.
Troll One (97ee52) — 12/17/2010 @ 8:17 pmSometimes, you never know who that stranger is that waves at you.
Anonymous Stranger Waving (07faa1) — 12/17/2010 @ 8:45 pmMy hiding place is better than Bin Laden’s!
The Regulation of Bake Sales Contained in the Public School Food Act (7f42e2) — 12/18/2010 @ 1:33 amDon’t let all of those record low temperatures — all across the country — fool you. I’m still real.
Settled Science (7f42e2) — 12/18/2010 @ 2:13 amWeather is not climate…er, climate is not…ah…Al Gore FTW!!!
Climate Change Consensus (e7577d) — 12/18/2010 @ 2:59 amHey, guys, Fox & Friends is on right now, and I’m wearing this awesome Christmas-red dress, showing off my gorgeous legs, and, for a bonus, just a tiny bit of cleavage! 🙂
Alisyn Camerota (bd7e62) — 12/18/2010 @ 4:15 amWhat the hell happened to my sockpuppet? bah I had a William down pat comment 🙁
Lord Nazh (11400d) — 12/18/2010 @ 11:46 amFantastic news today folks!
Anyone know how I can get my personalized line of fisting kits and dental dams into the military PX system?
Kevin Jennings (c07dfa) — 12/18/2010 @ 4:03 pmBlame those porn stars… I am innocent!
Ted Bundy (f1908c) — 12/19/2010 @ 9:04 pm