Patterico's Pontifications

3/6/2010

Chief of Staff Michael Moore

Filed under: Politics — DRJ @ 8:17 pm



[Guest post by DRJ]

Michael Moore thinks he is well-equipped to replace Rahm Emanuel as President Obama’s Chief of Staff:

“I don’t know what your team has been up to, but they haven’t served you well. And Rahm, poor Rahm, has turned into a fighter — not of Republicans, but of the left. He called those of us who want universal health care “f***ing retarded.” Look, I don’t know if Rahm is the problem or if it’s Gibbs or Axelrod or any of the other great people we owe a debt of thanks to for getting you elected. All I know is that whatever is fueling your White House it’s now running on fumes. Time to shake things up! Time to bring me in to get you pumped up every morning! Go Barack! Yay Obama! Fight, Team, Fight!

I’m packed and ready to come to D.C. tomorrow. If it helps, you won’t really be losing Rahm entirely because I’ll be bringing his brother with me — my agent, Ari Emanuel. Man, you should see HIM negotiate a deal! Have you ever wanted to see Mitch McConnell walking around Capitol Hill carrying his own head in his hands after it’s just been handed to him by the infamous Ari? Oh, baby, it won’t be pretty — but boy will it be sweet!

What say you, Barack? Me and you against the world! Yes we can! It’ll be fun — and we may just get something done. Whaddaya got to lose? Hope?”

Moore believes Obama’s 2008 election was a mandate proving Americans want universal health care and “oppose the Afghanistan and Iraq wars and want the bankers punished.” Moore seems to have forgotten Obama supported the war in Afghanistan, and I guess he believes Obama’s Presidential waffling is a result of bad advice from his Chief of Staff. Moore has also forgotten he trumpeted progressives’ 57-million person “mandate to to be as radical and liberal and steadfast as we need to be” after President Bush was re-elected in 2004 with 62 million votes.

Shorter Michael Moore: Democrats rule and Republicans drool.

— DRJ

29 Responses to “Chief of Staff Michael Moore”

  1. Epitomizes the idiocy, don’t he.

    EW1(SG) (edc268)

  2. They do need to be doing more to take on wall street. This CFPA is turning out to be kind of a joke.

    imdw (19cd35)

  3. Please Barry. Take him up on it. Please,Please.

    glenn (757adc)

  4. See, the thing that makes this not just funny, but hysterically funny, is not imagining Michael Moore or Barack Obama, but rather, imagining all of the tens of thousands of moonbats who will read Moore’s offer and then just nod and say, “Yup, yup, that’s probably not a bad idea, I kinda hope they do that.”

    Beldar (ad9810)

  5. It’s not the employing that’s the problem, it’s the feeding…we, as a nation, cannot afford it.

    Gazzer (655cee)

  6. It would be fun, though, if someone asked Gibbs if the President would consider the offer.

    Ag80 (f67beb)

  7. It might be good for Moore. He’d probably lose a lot of weight with the temperature set at the hot house levels Obama maintains in the Oval Office.

    daleyrocks (5710d7)

  8. I hope Obama doesn’t see this because Moore has a towering intellect that will destroy conservatism forever and his hygiene is impeccable.

    j curtis (5126e4)

  9. j curtis – Obama will be jealous because Moore’s moobs are bigger than Barack’s.

    daleyrocks (5710d7)

  10. They do need to be doing more to take on wall street.

    Given the current occupant of the White House, that deserves a big guffaw and sneer, one dripping with the ludicrous irony of it all…

    TheAtlanticWire.com, Heather Horn

    Brief bios: William Kristol is a dyed-in-the-wool conservative thinker, a defender of Bush foreign policy and founding editor of The Weekly Standard. Paul Krugman is a leftist economist who writes for The New York Times. The two, it goes without saying, are not natural allies.

    Yet they can agree on at least one thing: Obama is letting big bankers off too easily. Both are aghast at the president’s nonchalance about the JPMorgan Chase and Goldman Sachs CEO bonuses.

    “Oh. My. God.” writes an excitable Krugman, as Obama continues to fall short of liberal expectations. “These bank executives,” he explains, “are not free agents who are earning big bucks in fair competition; they run companies that are essentially wards of the state.” Thus, “at the very least, you would think that Obama would understand the importance of acknowledging public anger over what’s happening.”

    “I agree with Paul Krugman,” announces Kristol, not mincing words. “If Obama’s idea of moving to the middle politically is to embrace Wall Street’s too-big-to-fail banks, he’s crazy.” Here’s why:

    Usually Republicans are the party of Big Business and Democrats of Big Government, and the public’s hostility to both more or less evens the politics out. But if Obama now becomes the spokesman for Big Government intrusiveness and the apologist for Big Business irresponsibility all at once–good luck with that.

    Mark (411533)

  11. Mark – Obama sucked in some major contributions from those Wall Street firms. It’s payback time.

    daleyrocks (5710d7)

  12. #4 Beldar:

    See, the thing that makes this not just funny, but hysterically funny,

    You’re right, there is a certain hysterical note to my laughter.

    However, since I’m not usually the hysterical type, I was having a difficult time identifying what it was. OTOH, the O!ne does so bring out the hysteria in me.

    EW1(SG) (edc268)

  13. It’s also pretty funny that Moore thinks he would be a valuable addition in the Obama White House.

    DRJ (daa62a)

  14. Put him in, Coach. The irony of him having to front Government Motors would be hugely delicious.

    political agnostic (5c49a5)

  15. 7.It might be good for Moore. He’d probably lose a lot of weight have to take his shirt off with the temperature set at the hot house levels Obama maintains in the Oval Office.

    Wait …

    Arbalest (9185e7)

  16. Michael Moore & Liz Cheney should both be grateful for the 24 hour newscycle; they’re both the epitome of stupid public rants.

    JEA (63b53e)

  17. “Given the current occupant of the White House, that deserves a big guffaw and sneer, one dripping with the ludicrous irony of it all…”

    It seems like you get exactly what I’m talking about. People are like “Obama the socialist” and I’m like “uuuh, please?”

    imdw (de7003)

  18. If only Obama would take him up on that offer. *clicks heels 3 times*

    Vivian Louise (643333)

  19. “Michael Moore & Liz Cheney should both be grateful for the 24 hour newscycle; they’re both the epitome of stupid public rants.”

    At least this gets Moore back in the news temporarily. although probably not in the way he wanted. He’s been pretty irrelevant for a while. Liz has been on a roll.

    daleyrocks (5710d7)

  20. ootta give the fat guy a point for consistentcy. Michael Moore believes his owo private version of utopia is desireble, possible and popular support. Moore has little patient and anybody who will not cede to hissy fits.

    Drop down and give me one, Micheal.

    DavidL (376fcd)

  21. “It’s not the employing that’s the problem, it’s the feeding…we, as a nation, cannot afford it.”

    Comment by Gazzer

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Between the food and the cost of transporting his fat ass around the globe, Americans can ill afford it. The foul-mouthed, former ballerina must stay.

    GeneralMalaise (04e9c2)

  22. It seems like you get exactly what I’m talking about.

    Nobody gets “exactly” what you are talking about.

    When you aren’t absolutely incoherent, you display absolutely no knowledge of history, economics, politics, nothing that has any bearing on the subject at hand…or any other, for that matter.

    Go grow up first, then come back.

    EW1(SG) (edc268)

  23. “Liz has been on a roll.”

    An anti-American, anti-Constitution roll. The founding fathers are rolling in their graves with her latest outrage. She eclipses Coulter by a mile.

    Moore’s just as bad, only a hell of a lot uglier

    JEA (63b53e)

  24. I guess the difference is that Liz Cheney isn’t touting herself for White House Chief of Staff.

    Some chump (36dbd5)

  25. I remember Obama saying something about his being “a blank slate”, that people were free to think of him as they wanted to.

    As a candidate, this was great. The hard core left knew what it meant to hang around with Weathermen Underground types as your buddy and jumped at it. Other people didn’t know, didn’t care, and/or didn’t want to know, they just liked the sound of all of his rhetoric whether it was reality-based or not.

    As an elected official, not so good. The far left wants him to live up to their expectations now, and the more “moderate” or conservative voters that bought the happy rhetoric want no part of the liberal policies.

    I imagine Obama, if he had his way, would wink at the hard core left and they would catch his lead and tone it down for awhile in order to not upset those in the middle who got him elected, giving him a chance to put in the roots of revolution that would flourish later.

    MD in Philly (70a1ba)

  26. “Michael Moore & Liz Cheney should both be grateful for the 24 hour newscycle; they’re both the epitome of stupid public rants.”

    Comment by JEA

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Liz Cheney’s “stupid public rant”/”anti-American, anti-Constitution” statements were what specifically???

    GeneralMalaise (04e9c2)

  27. Did anyone catch this from Mikey’s blog:

    “THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ELECTED ME, NOT THE REPUBLICANS, TO RUN THE COUNTRY! I AM IN CHARGE! I WILL ORDER ALL OBSTRUCTIONISTS OUTTA MY WAY! IF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE DON’T LIKE WHAT I’M DOING THEY CAN THROW MY ASS OUT IN 2012. IN THE MEANTIME, I CALL THE SHOTS ON THEIR BEHALF! NOW, CONGRESS, DROP AND GIVE ME 50!!”

    The hubris of that overwhelms me. The President does not run the country, contrary to the wishes of the left. The country is made up of 300 million autonomous people who are (or at least should be) capable of running themselves. At best, you can say the President is in charge of the executive branch of the government, but that’s a far cry from “running the country”.

    I heard claptrap like this when Clinton was President (during the Lewinski saga, he said more than once he had to get back to the business of running the country). So, I guess that’s what liberals want: someone to run their lives.

    Some chump (050674)

  28. Fisking Moore’s rant:
    “I don’t know what your team has been up to, but they haven’t served you well.”
    — The fanatical devotion of the true believer: the Great Man remains great; it is his subordinates that have failed him. Many a German officer back in ’44-’45 was lined up against a wall & shot as the result of this kind of blind loyalty.

    “And Rahm, poor Rahm, has turned into a fighter — not of Republicans, but of the left. He called those of us who want universal health care “f***ing retarded.”
    — Tellingly, Moore sees the one thing Rahm got right as his greatest sin. What an effing retard!

    “Look, I don’t know if Rahm is the problem or if it’s Gibbs or Axelrod or any of the other great people we owe a debt of thanks to for getting you elected.”
    — Gibbs helped get Obama elected? That seems to be just one of many things that Moore “don’t know”. And if he doesn’t know where the problem lies, how can he possibly know how to fix it?

    “All I know is that whatever is fueling your White House it’s now running on fumes.”
    — Resulting in the accomplishment of Jack & Squat. Thank God!

    “Time to shake things up! Time to bring me in to get you pumped up every morning! Go Barack! Yay Obama! Fight, Team, Fight!”
    — All he has to do to shake things up is get out of bed on the 2nd floor of the WH.

    “I’m packed and ready to come to D.C. tomorrow.”
    — I don’t want my tax dollars spent buying two seats on that plane!

    “If it helps, you won’t really be losing Rahm entirely because I’ll be bringing his brother with me — my agent, Ari Emanuel. Man, you should see HIM negotiate a deal!”
    — This shows great confidence in Ear Leader, eh? He hired the wrong brother!

    “Have you ever wanted to see Mitch McConnell walking around Capitol Hill carrying his own head in his hands after it’s just been handed to him by the infamous Ari? Oh, baby, it won’t be pretty — but boy will it be sweet!”
    — Yeah, Mitch looks really scared. Maybe he’s afraid that you’ll be in line ahead of him at the congressional cafeteria.

    “What say you, Barack? Me and you against the world! Yes we can! It’ll be fun — and we may just get something done. Whaddaya got to lose? Hope?”
    — It’s the Jabba & Lando Show! [denounce myself] Actually, it would be the two of you against a free society. Quite a daunting task, don’t ya think?

    [note: released from moderation. –Stashiu]

    Icy Texan (775cfd)

  29. Michael Moore doesn’t know what Rahm knows. Obama is there for Soros and Pharma, not to advance some dopey hippie agenda.

    Vermont Neighbor (fdd4e9)


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