Patterico's Pontifications

1/24/2010

Caption Contest

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 8:36 pm

Looks like a Photoshop — but it’s not:

Obama Kid Teleprompter

Thanks to Jammie Wearing Fool.

UPDATE: Apparently TOTUS was present for an address to the media conducted in an elementary school classroom. POTUS’S earlier remarks to schoolchildren were apparently given without the benefit of TOTUS.

For the record. Not that it makes the above image any less idiotic.

75 Responses to “Caption Contest”

  1. Join with me, students, in saying the Pledge of Allegiance.

    DRJ (84a0c3)

  2. “I’m here in the classroom where Ellie Light learned about the government, and the Constitution, and all….”

    reff (176333)

  3. TOTUS goes to Kindergarten.

    John Hitchcock (3b6c6d)

  4. An embarrassed Arne Duncan ponders whether he should resign.

    elissa (ecf89e)

  5. Just one year later, George W. Bush is looking a hell of a lot better …

    SPQR (26be8b)

  6. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can…

    davidt (bdd901)

  7. “Let me be clear. Make no mistake. As I’ve said before–the time for spitballs is over.”

    Official Internet Data Office (e46847)

  8. I’m speechless (like Obama would be without TOTUS).

    Brother Bradley J. Fikes, C.O.R. (9eb641)

  9. The teleprompter ate my homework.

    aunursa (a1573d)

  10. But the alternative, having to take questions from children, is too risky.

    Alta Bob (e8af2b)

  11. Miss me yet?

    W (1592cc)

  12. But, seriously. Seriously?

    Ag80 (1592cc)

  13. Yes, I am a telemprompter. Who’s that standing behind me? Oh, he’s the President. He follows me wherever I go.

    Some chump (36dbd5)

  14. What a fool. What a disgrace to this country.

    Kevin Stafford (abdb87)

  15. OBAMA demonstrates historic, unprecedented use of the TOTUS?

    anne (ee680a)

  16. OMG. LOL. I saw a photo of that same scene yesterday, but it captured only a corner of the room. I wasn’t totally sure if it was a real image or not.

    At least he’d never be caught dead on camera doing something as absurd as bowing down — like a servant — before a foreign leader.

    Uh, oh…

    Mark (411533)

  17. What happens when you elect an affirmative action president.

    Jim (582155)

  18. Kindergarten Flop.

    SarahW (692fc6)

  19. The only caption that captures this adequately is “WTF?”

    EW1(SG) (edc268)

  20. “And that concludes today’s reading of ‘My Pet Goat'”.

    oneisnotprime (e25cc0)

  21. And if you don’t keep your grades up, your class hamster will be tried in the Hague. After being mirandized.

    SarahW (692fc6)

  22. You will have to personally render a guilty verdict. We wouldn’t try him if there were any other possible outcome.

    SarahW (692fc6)

  23. Joking aside, this illustrates how really inept — and foolish — he and his staffers are. Why in hell would they want to set up a lectern with the official presidential seal, and with teleprompters on either side no less, in a classroom? And not even in a classroom at a college or university, or one in a high school, but one in an elementary school?

    I know he was caught unfairly in a snapshot taken at some Memorial Day ceremony in DC a few months ago, in which at first glance it looked like he was the only one on stage not responding to the passing of the US flag. But this photo his all his. He owns this one.

    Mark (411533)

  24. “Today, children, I want to begin by talking to you about a critical part of America’s energy plans for foreseeable future: the extension cord.”

    DCSCA (9d1bb3)

  25. You guys are hilarious. LOL

    no one you know (1ebbb1)

  26. “Let me be clear – A is for Apple…”

    Scott Jacobs (d027b8)

  27. Aay. Bee. See. Dee. Eee. Eff. Gee…

    w3bgrrl (12f86d)

  28. Alright, who shot the spitball on my teleprompter?

    crosspatch (6adcc9)

  29. One day kids, if you stay in school,study hard and not do too many drugs like I did, you won’t have to use a teleprompter to give short little speeches because your brains are fried.

    daleyrocks (718861)

  30. “And, if you don’t do well in school, you’ll be stuck serving in the military; Just ask John Kerry. Now, where’s the plastic turkey?”

    redc1c4 (fb8750)

  31. “Where’s IMDW and Lovey today, did they make it to class for once, or are they out back sniffing glue and bicycle seats again?”

    redc1c4 (fb8750)

  32. Arne: I can’t believe he needs TOTUS to sing the words to ‘Mmmm, mmm, mmm’ . . .”

    Ozwitch (10578e)

  33. “…and remember, if your parents voted for Scott Brown, make sure you let your teacher know about it. It’s never good to keep secrets from Mr. Obama, is it?”

    Joel (641e64)

  34. “P-O-T-A-T-O. That is why I need your help to correct the mistakes of previous administrations.”

    Sam (8d373a)

  35. I’m here to announce the war on big education…

    EricPWJohnson (65ba3e)

  36. Obama begins campaigning early. Really early. For 2024.

    Steve B (5eacf6)

  37. OK, I just looked at a video of the President walking into this school room, shaking hands with the kids and being an all-around good guy. It’s at whitehouse.gov here http://www.whitehouse.gov/photos-and-video/video/raw-video-president-and-secretary-duncan-meet-6th-graders

    Good for him. I don’t know when the teleprompters and monitors were put into the schoolroom, but there may have been for a good reason.

    I retract my earlier snark and apologize to the President.

    Ag80 (1592cc)

  38. Not so good for him. You know why he was there, don’t you?

    SarahW (692fc6)

  39. Also the ‘good reason’ is that he’s a terrible extemporaneous speaker.

    SarahW (692fc6)

  40. I think this highlights one of the important differences between B.O. and G.W.. Bush enjoyed being thought of as the everyman, as a roll up your sleeves and get to work kind of guy.

    Obama is about The Image. About “being Presidential.” One the one hand, nothing wrong with that, but when it tranlstates into bringing out the full regalia complete with podium for a bunch of school-age kids, I think it’s trying too hard.

    It also screams “photo op” more than “genuine character.” IMHO.

    Steve B (5eacf6)

  41. I actually have no knowledge of why he was there.

    I acknowledge putting up teleprompters and monitors was stupid without a good reason.

    I also know what would have happened to President Bush in a similar situation, so I was trying to be charitable. Maybe my charity goes too far.

    Ag80 (1592cc)

  42. See the update. He apparently addressed the media in the classroom. Hence, TOTUS.

    Not that a funny caption is any less warranted.

    Patterico (c218bd)

  43. –Explaining to is his aides why he needed the teleprompter setup: “Whew, tough questions…the journalist I deal with aren’t this smart”

    –Encountering tough questions for the first time: “Uh, okay, uh, that one wasn’t my fault — I can explain…”

    –Explaining Liberal Economic Theory, which is the core of his domestic policy: “See, there are these Money-Elves…”

    –The President explains how he will repay their generation: “See, I’ll borrow it from you guys, then I will repay it with…hey, look over there, it’s something shiny!”

    Pons Asinorum (1f16cc)

  44. You might revisit here (from Jamie’s site) again. Look at the pictures carefully. Then look at the still for the WH video. It’s all from the same 6th grade class. He baffled them with bullshit then sat down to try to dazzle them with smiles. (Or the other way around. Who cares? He’s still scrofulously pathetic.)

    {^_^}

    JD (847e52)

  45. JD and Ag80 – only problem is that the President sat down with the kids in one classroom, and the podium and Seal are set up in an entirely different classroom … look at what is on the wall in each case …

    Two different classrooms …

    Yes, the stills show both classrooms …

    So far – I don’t see anything that says this wasn’t as set-up as all the astro-turfing currently being unearthed …

    Alasdair (205079)

  46. Caption Contest:

    I’m here today to express my heartfelt thanks for being offered this honorary degree from the school I’ve never successfully learned anything at — the Elementary School of Hard Knocks.

    IgotBupkis (79d71d)

  47. Inspired by other commenters, here are a few more possibilities —
    =============================================
    DRJ:
    Join with me, students, in saying the Pledge of Allegiance.

    If I may suggest an addition:
    Join with me, students, in saying the Pledge of Allegiance to me.

    Alta Bob:
    But the alternative, having to take questions from children, is too risky.

    “Is Obama smarter than a fifth grader? Unfortunately, as we’ve learned, no.”

    oneisnotprime:
    “And that concludes today’s reading of ‘My Pet Goat’”.

    I knew someone would have to mention that.

    Steve B:
    Obama is about The Image. About “being Presidential.”

    What’s hilarious, Steve, is that he’s as inept at that as he is of pretty much every other task more complicated than reading off a teleprompter.

    President. Parrot. Both start with “P”… Coincidence? Not in this case.

    Pons Asinorum:
    –The President explains how he will repay their generation: “See, I’ll borrow it from you guys, then I will repay it with…hey, look over there, it’s something shiny!”

    Nice one.
    “Pay NO attention to that man behind the Teleprompter!”

    Would that it were that simple, huh?

    IgotBupkis (79d71d)

  48. It looks to me like the President and his teleprompter were in a classroom but the students were in some kind of storage room. Maybe the students were moved out of their classroom to make room for the press conference people and podium/teleprompter set-up.

    DRJ (84a0c3)

  49. #48:”It looks to me like the President and his teleprompter were in a classroom but the students were in some kind of storage room. Maybe the students were moved out of their classroom to make room for the press conference people and podium/teleprompter set-up, bless his heart.”

    FTFY!

    redc1c4 (fb8750)

  50. Text of the Obama speech:

    A girl got a pet goat. She liked to go running with her pet goat. She played with her pet goat in her house. She played with her pet goat in her yard.

    But the goat did some things that made the girl’s dad mad. The goat ate things. He ate cans and he ate canes. He ate pans and he ate panes. He even ate capes and caps…

    American Elephant (c5189e)

  51. the “my pet goat” thing has always struck me as an odd way to attack Bush. Bush’s most defining day as president… the day when virtually no other president could have done as good as job as W, was that awful day. The time to react was not within 10 minutes of hearing something vague about the attacks.

    The guy who had the big red button and power over all the lives of our troops had a moment of deep thought just after he learned about 9/11. Oh, but it makes him look distracted on TV… Oh No!

    Obama, on the other hand, apparently actually plans out dopey looking moments at schools. I guess I should just consider my blessing that it wasn’t Obama who had to figure out how to avoid collapse and rioting on 9/11. Leaders like Obama could have simply lobbed missiles or even overreacted, and my guess is he would be unable to restore American confidence. Let’s hope we are further blessed that he doesn’t have to deal with another attack on a 9/11 scale.

    If he does, and he has a few minutes of stunned awkwardness, I bet the left is a lot more understanding.

    Dustin (b54cdc)

  52. “Kids, I am living proof that absolutely anybody can grow up to be POTUS.”

    “And remember — this is VERY important — when you sign your letter to the editor you are pretending to be Ellie Light.”

    “Remember when your teacher told you that your class bunny rabbit went to live on a farm? Well, kids, the truth is that an evil witch named Sarah Palin shot your bunny and then ate it.”

    “You kids have it so easy these days. Back when I was your age, I had to learn the Qur’an!”

    “And that, children, is how you ensure that everyone is treated fairly — by taking rights from some and giving them to others.”

    “If my daughter was pregnant with you, I would have your brains vacuumed out, and your body yanked out of her with a rusty coathang– Hey! This isn’t supporsed to be on-screen!”

    “Under my plan, if daddy wants to blow his money on crack & hookers, you still receive medical care. Pretty neat, huh?”

    “The irony, children — can you say “irony”? — is that Conan is getting paid a thousand times more than I am; and yet, I’m the bigger joke!”

    “For the hundredth time, NO, i’m not going to sign a golf ball for you!”

    “What does “Constitutional scholar” mean? Well, sweetie, it means that I am well-versed in international law.”

    “Do you understand, little girls? If Scott Brown were your father he would be FORCING you to kiss boys! ‘Yuck’ is right!”

    “Let me be clear. All of the evidence is not in, yet. But I will say this: it has not been proven that Bobby Jindal is free of cooties.”

    “Yes, son, acorns are nuts. What’s your point?”

    Icy Texan (9f815c)

  53. “Let me be clear! The layout of this classroom is completely unprecedented. We have created… or saved at least 100 hours of children not using it to learn simply by taking this to an unprecedented technology level as opposed to just walking in and saying what’s on my mind or answering questions.”

    Dustin (b54cdc)

  54. “Anybody can buy a TelePrompter.”

    Walsingham (3ff5ed)

  55. “Try to shoot those spitballs around these plastic shields of unprecedented clarity!”

    Do kids even do that anymore? They’d probably be in prison if they did.

    Dustin (b54cdc)

  56. “You think this is cool? You should see the TOTUS setup in each of my daughters’ bedrooms!”

    Joel (641e64)

  57. “It’s not about me…”

    SaveFarris (bb671c)

  58. So, when I need inspiration I turn to my favorite philosophers, Chairman Mao and Mother Teresa…

    ropelight (399497)

  59. Even a child can see that my I’m not just reading words written by my handlers. “Hope” and “change”, baby…

    chris (7b4ac6)

  60. You just know some union roadies are getting good coin out of this prez’nit.

    RickZ (515f30)

  61. “And today I’m announcing little Timmy from the third row as my 6th-Grade Education Czar.”

    the wolf (85e509)

  62. […] Patterico’s running a caption contest. Nicholas (via email) proposes Is Obama smarter than a fifth grader? Unfortunately, we’ve discovered the answer is: “No.” […]

    Fausta’s Blog » Blog Archive » Obama brings teleprompter to 6th grade (a98aa5)

  63. There are those who say a tax on school lunches can’t make a difference. Let me be clear, rationing will happen this year.

    FeFe (c2547f)

  64. […] to Talk to Schoolkids Frankly Speaking: My Goodness. Patterico’s Pontifications: Caption Contest and Obama: Did I Mention I Won the Nobel Prize? Frugal Café Blog Zone: Priceless: Scott […]

    Best Photo of the Weekend: Barack Obama & His Teleprompter Go to School (video) « Frugal Café Blog Zone (a66042)

  65. The time for raising your hand is over. POP QUIZ!

    SarahW (692fc6)

  66. TOTUS: Shit!!!! I broke down again!!!!

    POTUS Obumbler: UH, UH, UH!! OH SHIT!!!!!!

    peedoffamerican (b6ef3e)

  67. Truly Pathetic!!!

    AD - RtR/OS! (a1830d)

  68. “Kindergarten Klueless”!

    PCD (1d8b6d)

  69. Jeff, I’m ready to show that I am smarter than a fifth grader. As you can see, I brought my own version of “peek” which, as always, I’ll use for every question.

    Kevin Murphy (e38cfd)

  70. OK kids;
    Don’t be punished with a little kid…uh never mind.

    So, you want to be a spy? You can start today. Cool, huh.

    Shooter (df74e9)

  71. No No NO…’dog ate my homework’ doesn’t work any more, but you can use mine, it fools em every time…just tell ’em “It’s George Bush’s fault.”

    Shooter (df74e9)

  72. I was watching President Obama today, and that see-saw head movement he has as he switches from one teleprompter to another to mimic looking at the audience has really started to annoy the crap out of me.

    SPQR (26be8b)

  73. Isn’t it about time for Denzel to star in the remake of “The Candidate”?

    Icy Texan (858a9a)

  74. […] TOTUS to Speak to 6th Graders! Frankly Speaking: My Goodness. Patterico’s Pontifications: Caption Contest and Obama: Did I Mention I Won the Nobel Prize? Gateway Pundit: Sad: Obama Brings Teleprompter to […]

    Another Ouch… Jon Stewart Zings Obama for His Lame Teleprompter Use with 6th Graders (video) « Frugal Café Blog Zone (a66042)

  75. ” Now.. who can name all 57 states?”

    Vermont Neighbor (1a9eb2)


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