Patterico's Pontifications

10/13/2009

Reportedly Impotent and Sexually Frustrated Man Lashes Out at Attractive Conservative Commentator

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 7:51 pm

I refer, of course, to Keith Olbermann’s latest rant against Michelle Malkin:

She received death threats and hate-filled voice mails all thanks to the total mindless, morally bankrupt, knee-jerk, fascistic hatred, without which Michelle Malkin would just be a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.

Mashed-up bag of meat indeed:

But you know, without his spittle-flecked, laughably over the top rants against conservatives, this reincarnation of Edward R. Murrow would just be another “dud in bed”:

A BROWN-haired beauty who claims she had an unsatisfying one-night stand with Keith Olbermann is getting her sweet revenge – she’s launched a blog to warn other women about the acerbic MSNBC commentator’s boorish bedroom habits.

. . . .

A 30-something office worker of Caribbean descent, KarmaBites1 said she struck up an e-mail friendship with Olbermann, whom she admired, and agreed to fly to New York to meet him last May. She says he came to her hotel room and opened a bottle of Merlot which he “spilled all over.” Then, when “sexual activity began [in] less than an hour,” Olbermann had difficulty. “I pretended he knew what he was doing,” the embittered blogger writes. “I adored the guy. I didn’t want him to think he was a dud in bed,” so she faked experiencing ecstasy.

Hahahahahahaha. It’s an oldie, but it still makes me laugh.

And it’s worth remembering now, as it may explain the frustrations that seethe beneath Olbermann’s surface.

UPDATE: Here’s the video:

P.S. Did Senor Soft-Stick there pronounce “fascistic” as “fasheestick”? Just checkin’.

UPDATE: Hey, at least it’s better than Chris Matthews daydreaming about Rush Limbaugh’s violent murder and saying, “we’ll be there to watch”:

UPDATE x2: Caption contest!

Comments (41)

41 Responses to “Reportedly Impotent and Sexually Frustrated Man Lashes Out at Attractive Conservative Commentator”

Hahahahaaaa.

Why am I not surprised?
KingShamus (fb8597) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:00 pm
Keith Olberman is a picklebiter.
nk (df76d4) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:07 pm
” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Well, not to put too fine a point on it, but I think she’s pretty hot.
EW1(SG) (edc268) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:12 pm
Wow.

“…without which Michelle Malkin would just be a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it…”

And Patterico? I wonder what would happen if many of us politely wrote to NOW headquarters and asked them to comment on Mr. Olbermann’s support of feminism?

But it is interesting to see how the nice, mature Leftists rave like maniacs when people in Defined Groups do not toe the line.
Eric Blair (0b61b2) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:12 pm
In fact, maybe that nutjob at Sadly, No could comment? I mean, since he is so sensitive to nuance.
Eric Blair (0b61b2) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:14 pm
So I’m seeing a pattern here with ~~men~~ males on the left, between Olbermann and the hateful comments from the Sadly, No wusses, they seem to genuinely hate women.

How ironic that in our post-racial world, misogyny and sexism is still perfectly acceptable.
dana (863a65) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:16 pm
There is a fable about a toad that puffed himself up until he exploded. Is there a lesson there for Keith ?
Mike K (187f3b) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:16 pm
In fact, maybe that nutjob at Sadly, No could comment? I mean, since he is so sensitive to nuance.

You’re speaking of the enlightened site where someone today said of Tammy Bruce:

You have to fucking pay to post on that bitch’s cuntblog? Fuck that noise.

Pass.
Patterico (64318f) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:18 pm
Olbergasm takes ona whole new meaning.
JD (6ef835) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:19 pm
The NFL commissioner’s views of Rush being too controversial makes me wonder what they should do about Olberman. Conservatives should start a campaign getting him off the NFL shows on NBC.
Alta Bob (e8af2b) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:23 pm
#6 dana:

How ironic that in our post-racial world, misogyny and sexism is still perfectly acceptable.

Well, certainly! If you are appropriately a member of the “in” crowd. Along with a heaping dose of anti-Semitism. And racism. And hatred. And, you know what?

It’s a long darn list.
EW1(SG) (edc268) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:28 pm
Well, Patterico, I appreciate that information. It’s good news that those folks at Sadly, No are so devoted to Progressive ideals.

I think that NOW needs to address this immediately.

Dana, I wonder why they hate women, particularly women with whom they disagree. I can come up with some answers, as I’ll bet you can, as well.
Eric Blair (0b61b2) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:29 pm
Vile little git.
SPQR (26be8b) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:29 pm
You know, that’s a really lovely photo of Malkin. A pretty, young woman who is a mommy to small children and wife to a good husband; it rather makes Olbermann’s attack all the more rancid. And pathetic. And desperate.

Perhaps he can get help for his dysfunction. Maybe then he won’t be consumed by his own anger and frustration.
Dana (863a65) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:32 pm
Ms. Malkin is gorgeous and Mr. Olbermann is, shall we say, less than attractive. Perhaps the bigger envy is that she’s got a NYT bestseller (more than one actually IIRC), two great websites and a terrific family and Keith is, well…on MSNBC. With, so far as I know, a cute kitteh called Miss Precious Perfect waiting at home for him.
no one you know (1ebbb1) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:33 pm
#12 Eric Blair:

I wonder why they hate women, particularly women with whom they disagree.

Oh, I think it’s that classic insecurity thing, you know like their mother is going to leave them or something. A mental disease, like. I think it’s called “smallcocks.”
EW1(SG) (edc268) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:34 pm
Keith Olberman said:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

I’m not a huge fan of Malkin. I’m not a huge fan of Olbermann, but let’s put this comment in a bit of context I mean, just suppose:

Olbermann said about Laura Bush:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Olbermann said about Ann Coulter:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Olbermann said about Laura Ingram:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Or, suppose, Rush Limbaugh said about Nancy Pelosi”

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Or Rush said about Hillary Clinton:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Or Rush said about Justice Sotomayor:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

I’m not going to defend Rush Limbaugh or Keith Olbermann on anything they may or may not have said.

I just want to say, what if Keith Olbermann had said that my wife is:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

Or if he had said my daughter is:

” …a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.”

You see, the problem isn’t the “big mashed up meat with lipstick” part.

The problem is the “it” part.

I welcome any responsible, intelligent progressive to explain to me why a woman, or a man, or an African-American or a Hispanic-American or a gay person or a Tea-bagger or a Conservative, or a union member, or an Acorn member, or anyone, should be called an “it” for purely political purposes.

If you can’t, why in the name of all that’s right would you not call out Olbermann for the wicked filth he spewed?
Ag80 (2a7a2a) — 10/13/2009 @ 8:34 pm
Michelle I find more compelling when she’s on the case of Republicans than when she’s going after dirty socialists. Mostly cause I’ll never get over her shrieky weirdness about Dubai Ports World.

That was very wrong.
happyfeet (f62c43) — 10/13/2009 @ 9:17 pm
I have a friend from Dubai and it was embarrassing.
happyfeet (f62c43) — 10/13/2009 @ 9:19 pm
I can’t stand watching his show because he is so vicious, but this really takes the cake.

“Bag of meat with lipstick on it.” Good grief. I’m sure the feminists will condemn him soon.

I have to say, though, dud or not, I have to give him credit. I never imagined him as human enough to engage in any
sexual activity.
Patricia (c95a48) — 10/13/2009 @ 10:54 pm
Why is it that the liberals that whine and cry about how angry and hateful Republicans are seem to be the ones on TV being hateful and angry all the time.

I guess this irony is racist.
Baxter Greene (af5030) — 10/13/2009 @ 10:57 pm
I guess this irony is racist.

The irony also illustrates other pathetic aspects of liberals. Here, again, is my semi-regular salute to the left, to their hollowness and insincerity, if not two-timing dishonesty:

Reason.com:

‘Tis the season for giving—and it turns out that conservatives and like-minded welfare skeptics more than hold their own when it comes to charity. So says Arthur C. Brooks in his new book Who Really Cares?: The Surprising Truth About Compassionate Conservatism. Brooks, a public policy professor at Syracuse University, sums up his own results thusly: Giving is dictated by “strong families, church attendance, earned income (as opposed to state-subsidized income), and the belief that individuals, not government, offer the best solution to social ills–all of these factors determine how likely one is to give.”

A 2002 poll found that those who thought government “was spending too much money on welfare” were significantly more likely than those who wanted increased spending on welfare to give directions to someone on the street, return extra change to a cashier, or give food and/or money to a homeless person.

Brooks finds that households with a conservative at the helm gave an average of 30 percent more money to charity in 2000 than liberal households (a difference of $1,600 to $1,227). The difference isn’t explained by income differential—in fact, liberal households make about 6 percent more per year. Poor, rich, and middle class conservatives all gave more than their liberal counterparts. And while religion is a major factor, the figures don’t just show tithing to churches. Religious donors give significantly more to non-religious causes than do their secular counterparts.

Asked about the relationship of the belief in freedom to the levels of giving, Brooks responds quickly: “Freedom and opportunity are the sister virtues to charity,” he says. “People who do not value freedom and opportunity simply don’t value individual solutions to social problems very much. It creates a culture of not giving.”

The people who give the least are the young, especially young liberals. Brooks writes that “young liberals—perhaps the most vocally dissatisfied political constituency in America today—are one of the least generous demographic groups out there. In 2004, self-described liberals younger than thirty belonged to one-third fewer organizations in their communities than young conservatives. In 2002, they were 12 percent less likely to give money to charities, and one-third less likely to give blood.”

Liberals, he says, give less than conservatives because of religion, attitudes about government, structure of families, and earned income. The families point is driven home by other results from Brooks. He writes that young liberals are less likely do nice things for their nearest and dearest, too. Compared with young conservatives, “a lower percentage said they would prefer to suffer than let a loved one suffer, that they are not happy unless the loved one is happy, or that they would sacrifice their own wishes for those they love.”

Mark (411533) — 10/13/2009 @ 11:17 pm
I have said it before and i will say it again. nothing drives liberals more crazy than a sexy conservative. my pet theory is that sex and politics is mixed up with them in a really, really bad way, so to desire a woman who doesn’t agree with them is really, really frustrating.

I mean i am sure by now you have all seen Malkin’s hate mail. Yes, her hate mail is appallingly racist, but also there is an element of wish fulfillment going on there as they stereotype her as a whore. And Ann Coulter has haters expressing rape fantasies. Exhibit A is that playboy blog about who you would like to “hate-screw” (they used a stronger term, but i am not sure if this forum is moderated that way). And of course Olberman is expressing his sexual frustration here, too.
A.W. (e7d72e) — 10/14/2009 @ 5:51 am
Didn’t Olby spend an hour ranting about the care his father has received and the frustrations he has had with Medicare?

Why doesn’t he take some of the millions he got from MSNBC (who got it from GE who got it from the U.S. taxpayer courtesy of TARP) and use it to get the private care for his dad?

Is he really that big of a dufus to believe that the government can do a better job taking care of people than private individuals?
MU789 (3f9d29) — 10/14/2009 @ 6:11 am
He’s ruining Sunday Night Football, with the smugness.
carlitos (ad57b1) — 10/14/2009 @ 6:18 am
It’s already ruined IMO. And yeah, Malkin’s really ugly, no question. What?
Dmac (5ddc52) — 10/14/2009 @ 7:20 am
Still studying the case to know whose side to take. Hmmmmm….
The Emperor always strives to be fair and objective. 8)
The Emperor (1b037c) — 10/14/2009 @ 7:23 am
Tell Olbermann’s frustrated 30-something, brown-haired, playmate of Caribbean descent not to feel bad. The condition she encountered, or failed to encounter (whatever, I don’t want details) is typical of drunks, progressives, closeted gays, and softies on the Left. It really isn’t her fault. She’s not to blame, she’s just got her account in the wrong bank.

If she wants a man who can cut the mustard, she should forget those blabber-mouth, pastel poodles, in the antique media, and be on the lookout for a solvent heterosexual. One who doesn’t waste his precious bodily fluids spewing venom at the likes of intelligent and attractive women. That should be like a flashing red light: Watch Out, Black Ice Ahead. It’s there alright, you just can’t see it till it’s too late.

There’s actually plenty of decent, good looking, healthy guys available. Hint: they don’t drink white wine and they don’t show up at rallies for Greenpeace or PETA. They don’t froth at the mouth if you happen to disagree with liberal dogma, and they don’t suck-up to charlatans and philistines, nor do they look like extras on made-for-TV gangster movies.

You can save lots of time if you skip any guy who makes a distinction between liberals and progressives. That guy hasn’t got you on his mind, and guaranteed, he hasn’t got the right stuff to make your monkey dance. Happy hunting.
ropelight (8dcd85) — 10/14/2009 @ 7:31 am
“Señor Soft-Stick” — HA!

That should be the hateful ranter’s new nickname.
Brother Bradley J. Fikes, C.O.R. (0ea407) — 10/14/2009 @ 7:34 am
I now support government-paid health care, because Keith Olbermann needs his Viagra. Surely we taxpayers could help him come, er, up with that.

[note: fished from spam filter. –Stashiu]
The suddenly liberal Dana (3e4784) — 10/14/2009 @ 9:05 am
Oops, should have realized that the name of a particular prescription drug would send my last comment to te spam queue! 🙂

Well, we all know what particular prescription drug Mr Olbermann needs, so we should now all support government health care, to make sure he gets it.
The suddenly liberal Dana (3e4784) — 10/14/2009 @ 9:07 am
Ropelight wrote:

Tell Olbermann’s frustrated 30-something, brown-haired, playmate of Caribbean descent not to feel bad. The condition she encountered, or failed to encounter (whatever, I don’t want details) is typical of drunks, progressives, closeted gays, and softies on the Left. It really isn’t her fault. She’s not to blame, she’s just got her account in the wrong bank.

And the Oscar for the best unintended pun of the day goes to . . . .
The amused Dana (3e4784) — 10/14/2009 @ 9:09 am
Kudos to Keith for identifying a tasty morsel of mystery meat simmering in the caldron of canned conservative stew. The vegetables are so much easier to identify. Eat it up! And sop up the gravy with a fat slice of white bread. No ‘rush’… wash it all down at leisure with a bottle of Beck’s. Empty calories all.
DCSCA (9d1bb3) — 10/14/2009 @ 12:32 pm
The International Man of Parody endorses misogyny.

Typical.
SPQR (26be8b) — 10/14/2009 @ 12:45 pm
I give Keith credit. He hired his gf (as a ‘producer’) unlike David Letterman.And (She’s 22), he was appointed her legal guardian by the court.
Wonder what stories she’ll sell to the tabs.
corwin (d1092a) — 10/14/2009 @ 3:46 pm
IMP does not endorse misogyny, he is a misogynist.
JD (cc3aa7) — 10/14/2009 @ 3:56 pm
“I give Keith credit. He hired his gf (as a ‘producer’) unlike David Letterman.And (She’s 22), he was appointed her legal guardian by the court.
Wonder what stories she’ll sell to the tabs.”

– corwin

Ewww.
Leviticus (5288ba) — 10/14/2009 @ 4:36 pm
Leviticus – Ewwwwww is something that Olbergasm likely hears quite often.
JD (70688e) — 10/14/2009 @ 4:38 pm
Someone said it above, but I’m just pissed to see his smug little face on Sunday Night Football. It’s no problem to avoid MSNBC, but I likes me my football, and it makes me mad that Olbermann gets to keep announcing football after making an ass of himself as a political commentator.

It’s almost like (regular) NBC only cares about ratings, or something.
Leviticus (5288ba) — 10/14/2009 @ 4:45 pm
How does Rush get run out of the booth and Olbergasm stays in the booth?
JD (70688e) — 10/14/2009 @ 4:54 pm
[…] who called Bobby Jindal a “caveman” who was “Gomer Pyle” and called Michelle Malkin “a big mashed-up bag of meat with lipstick on it.” He also went on a rampage last year […]
Absurd & Vile: Olbermann & His Racist Smears Against Massachusetts, Brown, & Truck Owners (video) « Frugal Café Blog Zone (a66042) — 1/21/2010 @ 2:58 am

10/13/2009

Reportedly Impotent and Sexually Frustrated Man Lashes Out at Attractive Conservative Commentator

41 Responses to “Reportedly Impotent and Sexually Frustrated Man Lashes Out at Attractive Conservative Commentator”

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