Patterico's Pontifications

2/28/2009

Ya Damn Blazer-Wearers!

Filed under: General — Patterico @ 3:53 pm

Jeff Goldstein is (not really) at CPAC, and he’s spotted some of you there!

[T]he occasional Patterico reader marches by with a big sign reading “NOT IN MY NAME,” a kind of surreal sight, given that they’re all wearing smoking jackets and top hats and wagging their fingers indiscriminately at anyone who looks like s/he might listen to Rush Limbaugh without the requisite sense of sophisticated coastal irony.

In addition to your smoking jackets and top hats, you wear blazers. And sip tea.

I don’t even know you people.

23 Responses to “Ya Damn Blazer-Wearers!”

  1. Please, try to end each comment with “. . . old boy.” And it’d be good if you could begin them with “I say . . .”

    Let’s practice. I’ll take one of daleyrocks’s past comments as an example:

    Actual comment:

    A fuckstick like yourself sounds just like the unhinged moonbats from Racistdogfakes or Kos, who can’t disagree with anyone without verbal abuse. You can’t just disagree with Patterico’s post, you have to make fun of it. Blow me ’til I burst.

    Preferred language to comport with Goldstein view of Patterico commenters:

    I say, my good man, you’re quite the fuckstick. Kindly blow me ’til I burst, old boy.

    Add a tip of your top hat and a moustache twirl and you’re done!

    Patterico (cc3b34)

  2. That last “old boy” should rightly be replaced with an “Old Sot”.

    AD - RtR/OS (5e419c)

  3. Oops, forgot…
    Please precede comment with an “I say, old boy”!

    AD - RtR/OS (5e419c)

  4. …wear blazers….
    Don’t forget a proper Ascot, old chum.

    AD - RtR/OS (5e419c)

  5. okay I will practice. Actual comment.

    I say, looking at the videos and reading your text causes me to experience a sense of dislocations. You have tried to make their emphasis different than was their intent and have thereby mischaracterized what was said. Shame on you. It makes me wonder if you don’t have too much unresolved anger about some of these people and issues for you to be able to comment in a fair manner, old boy.

    happyfeet (71f55e)

  6. Lol!!!

    I spot patterico readers occasionally when I travel–usually smiling smugly with their free mileage coupon first-class upgrade, sitting in seat 2A enjoying a freight mimosa whilst perusing the latest comment flame-war on the fancy iPhone 3G.

    The Uniform:
    – Jeans (expensive)
    – Shirt (tucked in)
    – Loafers by Bruno Magli (in voice of Johnny Cochran)
    – And … A Blazer!!!

    I daresay, old boy, that the elitist bastards must be overcompensating for the potty-mouthed rantings of the commentariat.

    carlitos (6a7ad8)

  7. I say, old chums, that “freight” is a contraction of free pre flight”

    Cheerio

    carlitos (6a7ad8)

  8. How about instead of old boy at the end of every comment you type “he’s a good man trying to do what he thinks is right for the country.”? I think that would be more applicable in this situation.

    Mr. Pink (0ee368)

  9. It is dreadfully droll, don’t you think, the way a barbarian such as Goldstein chooses to–I think he believes–lampoon, as it were, the way everyone seems to be all wrapped up in moralizing about the terribly vitiated sensibilities of everyone else, wot? Mmmmmm, and I rather think it would be best if we kept our voices at a responsible volume lest he attempt a bit of the old krav maga on us, old boy.

    Dan Collins (4dc2da)

  10. Hey, Jeff knows that I wear a well-worn leather jacket and drink beer – although not that Guinness swill he likes.

    SPQR (26be8b)

  11. Actually, you have to end each declarative sentence with, “isn’t it?” with a tone that brooks no refusal to agree. Also, “old man” is actually a bit more authentic.

    The proper tone can be determined, when in doubt, by watching Harry Lime in “The Third Man.”

    Mike K (2cf494)

  12. Where to begin?

    We are North Americans.

    And for those of you who still think we’re from England… we’re not, no, I don’t think.

    happyfeet (71f55e)

  13. “Oh, please. Patterico is a tool of the government, a bought and paid for brick in the wall.”

    Now that’s sum funny stuff right there!

    TC (0b9ca4)

  14. Jolly good! The bloke is joking, isn’t he?

    But, honestly, tea? Gentlemen, it’s after five somewhere! I’m off to quaff a Pim’s Cup or two.

    Patricia (419c68)

  15. Patterico is a tool of the government. . .
    a crescent wrench – in their works.

    Apogee (f4320c)

  16. #14 Patricia:

    But, honestly, tea?

    I am convinced that the decline of the British Empire and a downturn in the consumption of tea are closely related.

    And if I sipped the damn stuff I’d never get my daily gallon in.

    EW1(SG) (e27928)

  17. Really, only a fashion barbarian would ever think of wearing a top hat with a smoking jacket. I am a Patterico reader who has, on the proper occasions, worn a tuxedo, a dinner jacket, a blazer and a smoking jacket. I have also worn, with elan, an ascot. Never a top hat as they went out of fashion when Kennedy was elected. A smoking jacket, to Mr. Goldstein and others of the “great unwashed,” is worn indoors, preferably with a good cigar in one hand and a fine brandy in the other, by a gentleman entertaining a lady. A top hat is never worn indoors unless the wearer is an observant orthodox Jew.

    Longwalker (4e0dda)

  18. The difference is, Longwalker, you have a job, Patterico has a job, I have a job…

    Goldstein does not, so he is unaware of how one would dress for work. Then again, it would take a truly gifted tailor to fit a jacket over the chip he has on his shoulder.

    Meanwhile, Pablo is somewhere weeping with JD…they hate when their parents fight.

    timb (ab19f6)

  19. Fuck off, timmah. Go find someone else to stalk. You are creepy.

    JD (0d1f38)

  20. Okay, so maybe I overdressed when I went to lunch with Jeff, but it’s not like I wear the top hat every frickin’ day…

    Karl (8966b4)

  21. Dickwad, I mean, JD, don’t project. Just pick whose house you want to live in after the divorce. I’d choose Patterico, because, well, he’s not crazy and self-destructive.

    But, I get it, you’re hurting inside.

    timb (8f04c0)

  22. Patterico – Wow, did I say that out loud? Excuuuuuse me!!!!!

    daleyrocks (5d22c0)

  23. You really are a vile fucking asshole, timmah.

    JD (2d2bfc)


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