Patterico's Pontifications

6/5/2008

Caption Contest

Filed under: 2008 Election,General,Humor — Patterico @ 6:37 am



From the L.A. Times Top of the Ticket blog: a picture that is worth a thousand words.

bill-clinton-thumb.jpg

42 Responses to “Caption Contest”

  1. See this thumb? It’s all I have left. (Spoken in the same whiney tone of voice as Steve Martin used in the move-out scene in “The Jerk”)

    martin (cd5d90) — 6/5/2008 @ 6:41 am

  2. “One in the stink…”

    Scott Jacobs (fa5e57) — 6/5/2008 @ 6:50 am

  3. Like Safire said…it’s congenital.

    capitano (03e5ec) — 6/5/2008 @ 6:59 am

  4. “Yeah, they’re big enough. Round ‘er up boys.”

    Jack Klompus (cf3660) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:01 am

  5. “Preparing to jump the largest shark-tank in the world, Super Dave Osborn gives Hoshi the thumbs up…”

    Scott Jacobs (fa5e57) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:08 am

  6. … Sound of rubber surgical glove being snapped in the background ….

    “Baracky. See this thumb? I am still debating on whether or not to lube it before I jam it in your arse”

    JD (75f5c3) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:11 am

  7. “Thanks for that copy of Swank, Armen!”

    Jack Klompus (cf3660) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:19 am

  8. “i’m going to jam my thumb in your anus” – from http://www.cracked.com/article/_16335_7-innocent-gestures-that-can-get-you-killed-overseas.html

    assistant devil's advocate (4718c3) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:33 am

  9. “Mommy, I got a booboo on my fumb.”

    nk (be56c0) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:34 am

  10. “I’m not allowed to use cigars anymore, so I just have to use my thumb when not having sex.”

    G (722480) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:17 am

  11. Dammit, G! I guess it was too obvious a joke.

    JohnW (8267ac) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:23 am

  12. Can I get a hummer over here, please?

    daleyrocks (d9ec17) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:23 am

  13. “Awww ah aint got nah place t’ put this heeyah thumb no maw!”

    Jack Klompus (cf3660) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:26 am

  14. “This is not what I pictured when Hillary promised me a new ride once the primaries were over.”

    Stashiu3 (460dc1) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:32 am

  15. Yeah honey….sure, I’d love to massage your feet

    rudytbone (291994) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:53 am

  16. “I did NOT have sex with that woman…Ms. Gershon! Hey, you gahht any fries with that?”

    Dmac (66e1f8) — 6/5/2008 @ 8:58 am

  17. “Ok, now Billy how does a liberal act when they lose an election?”

    Pout and suck this?

    “We NEVER admit that, Billy!”

    cfbleachers (4040c7) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:13 am

  18. “Hey Levi!! Does the size of this look familiar to ya?”

    Jack Klompus (cf3660) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:14 am

  19. Obama in ’08…then bursts into tears.

    Perfect Sense (b6ec8c) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:34 am

  20. “Close, but no cigar”

    cfbleachers (4040c7) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:39 am

  21. Barnaby Jones remake??? I’m a shoo-in!!

    harkin (f8877d) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:48 am

  22. “Mmmmm…MMMMM!! You feel that slight sting in the back of your nose? Now that there is some quality Big Mac flatulence.”

    Joel (77e407) — 6/5/2008 @ 9:54 am

  23. “You don’t have to run for something to get elected. I’ve gotten pretty far this race in my bid to re-enter the White House, I’ve campaigned long and hard. I’m viewed with high regard in places I’ve never been to and popular with boobs who’ve never read.”

    G (722480) — 6/5/2008 @ 10:27 am

  24. “Hey Chrissy! I’ll give you a thrill up your leg!”

    Jack Klompus (cf3660) — 6/5/2008 @ 10:33 am

  25. “President Clinton would you show us an example of how you will act once you get behind Sen. Obama?”

    cfbleachers (4040c7) — 6/5/2008 @ 10:39 am

  26. “I never inhaled.”

    mike191 (77257c) — 6/5/2008 @ 10:56 am

  27. I never smoked crack or had sex with that man, Larry Sinclair.

    daleyrocks (d9ec17) — 6/5/2008 @ 12:29 pm

  28. Now that your wife’s out of the Presidential race, how do you feel about spending more time together?

    Apogee (366e8b) — 6/5/2008 @ 1:10 pm

  29. Ah’d be happy to hold Obama’s Quran thing on Inauguration Day.

    Vermont Neighbor (2464ca) — 6/5/2008 @ 1:46 pm

  30. Is there a reason why staffers call your buddy Ron Burkle’s private jet “Air Fuck One?”

    daleyrocks (d9ec17) — 6/5/2008 @ 1:56 pm

  31. “Michigan Switch — an earthy palate with a nutty aftertaste… a fragrant, yet fruity nose.”

    capitano (03e5ec) — 6/5/2008 @ 2:18 pm

  32. Up Obama(‘s) ’08!

    Zoltan (4d4c17) — 6/5/2008 @ 2:43 pm

  33. 1. “Ah’d use my middle finger if it weren’t so sticky”

    2. “Ah feel your pain. Ouch, it hurts!”

    ras (cfe315) — 6/5/2008 @ 5:14 pm

  34. This is not the Bill Clinton I knew….The Bill Clinton I knew used to have his finger pointed towards the camera as he swore ” I never had…with that woman…” This is a fake picture.

    love2008 (a6320b) — 6/5/2008 @ 5:51 pm

  35. If I can’t be “First Husband”, can I have Roger Ebert’s job?

    proof (4721a6) — 6/5/2008 @ 6:21 pm

  36. Hitching a ride down the road to oblivion.

    Peccator Dubius (0a6237) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:07 pm

  37. Hmmm… Tastes like chicken. Yep.

    EHeavenlyGads (f29174) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:37 pm

  38. “I hit it like a big dog!”

    Stan Switek (7cfd24) — 6/5/2008 @ 7:41 pm

  39. Since Patterico said this is a contest, and since no one else has stepped up to judge the entries, here is my ranking:

    1. Apogee #28 — excellent use of both the thumb and the facial expression in your entry.

    2. Scott Jacobs #2 & #5 — the “one in the pink” (or “one in the goo” or “one in the frown”) never gets old, and a Super Dave Osborne reference is always welcome.

    3. Jack Klompus #7 — for referencing Swank (do they still publish that mag?).

    Honorable mention to capitano for using the Urban Dictionary and Joel for making a fart joke. Excellent job all around from the contestants.

    JVW (78155f) — 6/5/2008 @ 10:59 pm

  40. — “Hey! Air Force One. Over here. Hey!”
    — Reaction to seeing Chelsea in Girls Gone Wild
    — The Spirit Of ’92
    — “I had an office in Harlem. How could they turn against me?”
    — “I should have inhaled.”
    — “You’re all just jealous of all the tail I’ve had.”
    — “Damn Vanity Fair, spoiling my good time.”
    — Four More Years . . . at home with the nutcracker
    — The thousand-bitch stare
    — “Why couldn’t someone ‘RFK’ her?”
    — “It used to stand up like this.”
    — “He’s already more popular than I ever was.”
    — “If you think living with her was hell before . . .”
    — “Do you know how many hos 20 million could have bought?”
    — “And they say that she hooked up with a loser.”
    — “I was this close to tappin’ Michelle.”
    — “Sit and spin, Howard Dean! Sit *sob* and *choke* spin.”
    — ‘Show us where the first lesion appeared, Mr. President.’

    Missed It By THAT Much (dfa803) — 6/6/2008 @ 4:20 pm

  41. I will not inhale, I will not inhale…

    Ken Hahn (7742d5) — 6/6/2008 @ 6:45 pm

  42. No, Barry, you forgot the “rotate” part. Try it again.

    bobby b (df4492) — 6/10/2008 @ 1:25 am


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