Patterico's Pontifications

6/21/2006

Is That a Banana in Your Pocket, Or Just a Minute Change in Your Erectile Response?

Filed under: Humor — Patterico @ 12:10 am



This interesting How Appealing blog entry says:

“Penile plethysmograph testing is a procedure that ‘involves placing a pressure-sensitive device around a man’s penis, presenting him with an array of sexually stimulating images, and determining his level of sexual attraction by measuring minute changes in his erectile responses.'” So begins an opinion that a three-judge panel of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit issued today.

The punch-line potential is endless. Write your own.

17 Responses to “Is That a Banana in Your Pocket, Or Just a Minute Change in Your Erectile Response?”

  1. Several members of the 101st airborne have been charged with using this test on al-qaeda prisoners, discovering that many of them were aroused by picures of small boys, pigs of either sex, and John Murtha.

    The latter has been ruled torture by Army officials.

    Murtha, reached for comment, could only sputter “Okinawa.”

    Kevin Murphy (0b2493)

  2. Hillary Clinton speeches were shown to cause near-intant deflation.

    Alan Kellogg (d8ffa0)

  3. I wonder to see the advancement in technology, wanna say just one word……
    “UNBELIEVABLE”

    Andrewgates (26c850)

  4. I think a machine that attaches the same way but administers a strong electric current rather than measuring anything would be a much more effective tool in dealing with pedophiles.

    nk (35ba30)

  5. Whereas Dick plethysmograph testing is a procedure that ‘involves placing a pressure-sensitive device on the head of a Democratic Underground member, presenting him with an array of pictures of Dick Cheney, and determining his level of dedication by measuring how quickly his head blows up.

    Neckties are required to keep the foreskin down during the procedure.

    Ed C:\> (7e9680)

  6. I got nothing but #1 and #5 got me laughing. Thanks.

    Old Coot (caf903)

  7. So much for the hand to mouth possibilities.

    Vermont Neighbor (a9ae2c)

  8. And just who is in charge of installing this device on the person? Is there a corresponding device for women? What does it look like?

    dchamil (82fe1b)

  9. The opinion says that there is. Footnote 1 says:

    In addition to penile plethysmograph testing, there is a corresponding procedure for women, known as “vaginal plethysmography.”

    It is not described any further.

    Patterico (50c3cd)

  10. ( Is there a corresponding device for women? What does it look like? )

    I presume it looks something like a credit card.

    Vermont Neighbor (a9ae2c)

  11. Several members of the 101st airborne have been charged with using this test on al-qaeda prisoners…

    Heh, heh, he said “members.”

    Attila (Pillage Idiot) (88e3e3)

  12. How can this work? Depending on exactly who afixed the device, it seems that one would either be unable to respond or unable to stop responding for a considerable period.

    Doc Rampage (47be8d)

  13. Doc, any more pragmatic suggestions on this topic and you’re going to have to rent a warehouse for filming purposes! And don’t forget the script. Magnolia Boulevard has some deals…

    Vermont Neighbor (a9ae2c)

  14. The kicker is that it was invented in the Czechoslovak Socialist Republic. No, really.

    Bleepless (2bdaa1)

  15. #14

    I believe it. Nothing goes better with potato vodka!

    Vermont Neighbor (a9ae2c)

  16. It’s been awhile, but I recall it was this device that’s been used for two purposes.

    The first in studies to determine how men react to the female form of various ages. Seems that half of the men tested had a reaction to girls as young as 12.

    The second in child sexual abuse cases to see how the suspect reacts to various situations, including pictures of young girls.

    Finally, keep in mind that human males, even pre-pubescent boys, have spontaneous erections.

    Are you getting the feeling I’m getting? 🙂

    Alan Kellogg (5cefdf)

  17. ……….complete loss of privacy i believe.

    Ethanwills (222f2a)


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