Patterico's Pontifications

3/31/2006

iowahawk: Operation Steel Gazelle: A Smart, Multi-Slide Plan For Toughening American Security with Smartness

Filed under: Humor,Terrorism,War — Patterico @ 11:16 pm

iowahawk has great post, in which Harry Reid and a realistically inarticulate Nancy Pelosi discuss the way they plan to end terrorism by capturing Osama bin Laden. A sample:

REID: . . . Using state-of-the-art PhotoShop smart computers, we will create simulated pictures of Osama bin Laden wearing a mustache, soul patch, trucker hat, and so on, and these will also be included in our emails. Then, the generals will distribute the pictures to the soldiers, and they can then make a surprise attack at Pakistan and get Osama bin Laden, no matter his latest look. Imagine the looks on the terrorists’ faces!

NANCY: Me too! What is next, in the plan?

HARRY: Well Nancy, after invading Pakistan and getting Osama bin Laden, our plan will next focus on rapid American redeployment from Iraq. With terrorism finally a thing of the past, we will need our American soldiers back here in the “good ol’ USA” to guard Osama bin Laden while he serves out a tough sentence in jail or an innovative work-release program.

NANCY: Sounds, smart! But what about toughness?

HARRY: Don’t worry Nancy – before we redeploy the soldiers out of Iraq, we will pass a tough new assault weapons ban in Iraq to keep these dangerous weapons out of the hands of civil war gangs. We will back it up with a roadside bomb amnesty program, and after-madrassa programs for at-risk insurgent youths.

An assault weapons ban! Iraq already has tons of assault weapons. They should already be banned! Damn incompetent Bush.

Go read it all.

One Response to “iowahawk: Operation Steel Gazelle: A Smart, Multi-Slide Plan For Toughening American Security with Smartness”

  1. I seriously injured myself reading that! ROTFLMAO!

    Peg C. (5907f4)


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