Patterico's Pontifications

5/30/2005

Teen Logic

Filed under: Judiciary,Law,Politics — Dafydd @ 1:04 am

Everything I know, I learned from the Brady Bunch.

In one episode, teenaged Greg is grounded from driving the car (because he was reading a record album cover while driving on the freeway… a strange coincidence, as I was watching the episode while driving on the same freeway). Later, his father, Mike, discovers he drove somewhere. “But you said I couldn’t drive the car,” Greg frantically explains; “our car. But I didn’t. I borrowed a friend’s car!”

Teen logic.

Teen logic is also the only thing that explains the glee with which Sen. Harry Reid (D-The Strip) exhorted his democratic colleagues, including the Seven Serpents, to filibuster judicial nominees Brett Kavanaugh and William Haynes, who haven’t even been vilified yet. Talk about getting ahead of yourself!

One imagines the dialog between Harry-Greg and Harry-Dad:

HD: Now Greg, you just gave your word you wouldn’t filibuster.

HG: No, my exact words were that I wouldn’t lead a filibuster except for “extraordinary circumstances.” I go by my exact words!

HD: What’s so extraordinary about Kavanaugh and Haynes?

HG: Well, I — I borrowed the car from — well, isn’t it extraordinary that a guy could steal the 2000 election, steal Ohio in 2004, and then turn around and nominate judges to the Circuit Court? I call that pretty extraordinary circumstances!

So now that we know what Sen. Reid meant by “extraordinary circumstances,” what would he think if a couple of the Seven Dwarfs — say Lindsay Graham and Mike DeWine — and maybe even the two “compromised” Democrats who turned him down (Ben Nelson and Mary Landrieu), were to decide that since he was breaking the spirit, if not the “exact words,” of the Memorandum of Misunderstanding, they would cross the aisle and vote for the constitutional option?

Somehow, I suspect he would argue as a few of the lawyerly types in Blogworld have: that the “agreement” they signed prohibits them from doing so, because it allowed each senator to decide for himself whether the circumstances were extraordinary.

HG: So, like, I can lead a filibuster if I decide myself that it’s extraordinary circumstances… but you can’t quit and vote for the nucular option because, like, you promised you wouldn’t, no matter what! Hah, burn!

Teen logic.

Well, that’s what you get for imagining any point of intersection between the real world and that strange Twilight Zone of “lawyer-space.” The reality is that any of the Gang of Fourteen, Republican or Democrat, can leave any time he wants… and the only people he would owe an explanation to are his constituents. None of whom hail from Nevada.

UPDATE FROM PATTERICO: Thanks to John Hinderaker for linking this post, and welcome to Power Line readers. As the comedians say, Dafydd is “here all week!” — along with a couple of other great guest bloggers: the Angry Clam and See Dubya. I hope everyone will continue to check back.

6 Responses to “Teen Logic”

  1. McCain, the guy who can strut while sitting down, just went for another “Campaign Finance” deal. I think the GOP is incapable of governance, incapable of just doing something, and only interested in praise from the Left Wing Media. No wonder Hillary Clinton is doing well in initial polling.

    Howard Veit (baba22)

  2. A lot of conservatives are upset, fearing that Harry Reid has executed an ingenious coup. But it’s ingenious in the Greg Brady sense – namely, idiotic.

    As minority leader, Reid has two responsibilities: promote the party’s ideology, and protect its incumbents.

    In the previous election, Daschle’s obstruction was immensely damaging to red-state Democrats. In the next election, more red-state Democrats will be vulnerable. So what does Harry do? He escalates the obstruction.

    This will play well in New York and Massachusetts, where Democrat senators are not vulnerable. But what matters is how it plays in Nebraska, North Dakota, and Florida – states where President Bush won re-election by a wide margin.

    Harry’s strategy will force exactly the response you predict. At least two of the seven dwarfs will walk away from the deal. In the end, he’ll lose both the ideological debate and the senate seats.

    lyle (440884)

  3. Funny, I always thought Greg had the better point in that argument.

    Not teen logic. Lawyer logic.

    Poly Psy (f5cbc8)

  4. Kavanaugh and Haynes are current nominees. The “extraordinary circumstances” pledge applies to future nominees. And Reid was not a party to the agreement and didn’t promise anything.

    James B. Shearer (fc887e)

  5. What’s next? “Mom always said, don’t play jihad in the house …”

    Leopold Stotch (c2e990)

  6. To James – Thanks, Greg!

    lyle (9627b4)


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